Holding You

by Kelly Elliott

  Chuckling, I said, “I will, sir.”

  Turning and leaning against the fence, Scott scanned the area. Pushing my hand over my head, I wasn’t sure why I was so damn nervous.

  “The second thing you showed me is your respect for my daughter and your belief in what she is capable of doing. Something I wasn’t doing until you and I had that little talk.” Glancing at me, Scott’s face was serious. “You sat there and let her take control of the conversation. You showed her that you would stand by her side no matter what and I respect the shit out of you for that, Colt. Your daddy is a fine man. One of the best men I’ve ever had the privilege of calling a friend. I have to tell you that . . .” Scott’s voice cracked as he shook his head and cleared his throat. “I have to tell you, Colt. Your daddy should be damn proud to see the man he and your mother have raised. I’d be honored . . . um . . . I’d be . . . hell this is so damn hard to say.”

  Trying to get a grip on my emotions, I had no idea what Scott was going to say. I had approached him yesterday morning and asked for Lauren’s hand in marriage. I wasn’t sure when I was going to ask her, but I wanted to make sure I had Scott and Jessie’s blessings. Scott had stood up and walked out of the room, leaving me standing there wondering why he left. Jessie had said it was hard for Scott to think of his little girl growing up and getting married. She told me to give him some more time.

  “Scott, if I did something wrong with the stallion then—”

  Scott lifted his hand and laughed. “No, Colt. You’re doing everything right, son, don’t stop what you’re doing.” Placing his hands on his knees he began taking in deep breaths.

  “Um, do you have asthma Scott? Is everything okay?” I asked as I tried to figure why Scott suddenly went pale and was trying to take in deep breaths.

  Holding up his hand and motioning for me to stop talking, I just stood there. Taking a look around, I saw Jessie standing on the back porch with a smile on her face.

  Scott stood up and jogged in place. “I’ve got this. I can do it.” Cracking his head from side to side I just stood there, trying to figure out what in the hell he was going to say.

  Turning to me, Scott looked right into my eyes. “Colt, I’d be honored to have you ask for Lauren’s hand in marriage. I see the two of you together and I know there is no other man that would make my little girl happier than you.”

  I bit down on the inside of my cheek to keep my tears at bay. What the hell was wrong with me? I’m acting like a pussy. I’m not going to cry. I’m not. I’m not a pussy. Don’t you dare cry, Colt Mathews.

  Reaching deep down inside, I pulled out the memory of seeing Luke naked that one time. My body shuddered at the memory and the tears quickly vanished.

  Reaching my hand out to shake Scott’s, I smiled. “Thank you, sir. That means the world to me to have your blessing.”

  Scott nodded, shook my hand fast and hard before dropping it. “Right. Okay then. That’s done.” Turning, he made his way back to the house. Jessie wiped a tear away as she watched Scott walk toward her. It wasn’t lost on me the motion of Scott’s hand coming up to his face and wiping a tear away.

  Glancing back at the barn, I watched as the love of my life came walking out with Mia on the end of the reins as she told Mr. Betrim what her plans were.

  Leaning against the fence I took it all in. The way the sun was shining on her hair, the smile that she wore that seemed to brighten the area around her. The way she laughed when Mia got excited about heading out. Everything about this moment was perfect.

  Beyond perfect.

  SITTING NEXT TO the fire, I watched everyone laughing. Alex was sitting on Will’s lap and I could practically see the love pouring out of them.

  Someone bumped my arm so I looked up. Libby was standing there. “Walk with me?”

  Nodding my head, I got up and started following her to the river’s edge. “These parties just don’t seem as fun anymore.” I said as Libby nodded her head in agreement.

  “Yeah, I agree. I’d rather be snuggled up on the sofa in Luke’s arms.”

  Smiling, I looked over at Libby. Her blonde hair was blowing softly in the breeze as she stared straight ahead. Taking in breath, I slowly blew it out as I said, “What’s on your mind?”

  Shrugging her shoulders, she peeked at me. “You.”

  Laughing, I pointed to myself and said, “Me? What about me?”

  Taking my arm in her arm we started walking along the riverbank. “I see something in your eyes, Lauren. Something I saw in my own eyes not too long ago.”

  “Oh yeah? What would that be?”

  Thinking Libby was going to say something about being in love, or being happy, I wasn’t prepared for what actually came out of her mouth.

  “You’re not happy and I talked to Colt about it.”

  I stopped walking and glared at her. “What? How dare you tell Colt I’m not happy. I’ve never been so happy in my entire life, Libby! Why? Why would you do that to me? Why would you say something to Colt like that?”

  My heart was beating like crazy because deep down inside, Libby was right. No. No. No she was wrong. So very wrong because I’m happy. I am. I have everything I’ve ever wanted.

  Placing her hands on my shoulders, Libby chuckled. “Calm down, Lauren. I don’t mean you’re not happy with Colt.”

  Wait. What? I’m so confused. What in the hell is she talking about?

  “What? Libby, are you like on crack or something because you aren’t making sense.”

  Laughing, Libby slowly shook her head. “No, I’m not on crack, but I am tired. Mireya hasn’t been sleeping very well through the night and I’ve been trying to figure out a way to get her to sleep and—”

  Oh. My. Glitter. Is she serious right now? She tells me she told Colt I’m unhappy, yet she babbles on about her daughter not being able to sleep? I’m about to vagina punch her.

  Libby continued to talk about some new lavender pillow she bought for the baby. Shaking my head, I held up my hands. “Stop. Oh my glitter, please stop talking. Libby! Focus, bitch. Focus!”

  “Oh right, gosh I’m so sorry. Okay, focusing back to you not being happy.”

  Ugh!

  “I am happy! Do I need to shout it from the rooftop?”

  Libby tilted her head and gave me that look. The same look my mother used to give me when she’s about to lecture me on something like, my shorts are too short, or I’m wearing way too much makeup or how guys like girls who are natural.

  Oh holy hell. Now I’m not focusing.

  “Lauren, honey I know you are so very happy with Colt. And he is so happy with you and he loves you so very much.”

  Tears began to form in my eyes. Ugh! I don’t cry. Stop this, Lauren. Stop this now. Why do I always cry when it comes to Colt? My voice cracked as I talked. “I know. He’s the yummy marshmallow fluff to my hot chocolate.”

  Libby giggled. “Yeah, I know he is, sweetheart.”

  A tear slowly made it’s way down my cheek. “Libby, I hate school. Oh my glitter . . . I hate it so much and I don’t know what to do. I can’t focus. I thought at first it was just because I was so wrapped up in Colt. You know. Pushing him away and always thinking about him.” Rubbing my fingers under my nose, I kept talking. “Then when we finally got together I was thinking this would fix everything, but it didn’t. I can’t focus because I don’t care about any of it, Libby! What am I going to do?”

  Libby pulled me into her arms and held me as she ran her hand up and down my back. “Shh, it’s okay, Lauren.”

  Shaking my head, I pulled back. “It’s not okay, Libby. If my father and mother heard me say that, I’d get the biggest lecture of my life. You know how our parents are about college degrees. I mean, look at my mother. She could own her own Vet clinic! She’s got all these stupid degrees and I . . . I just want to work on the ranch. I want to be with the horses everyday, not sitting in some stupid class learning about business.” Slamming my hands up to my face, I let out a frustrated scream as I s
ank down to the ground.

  Libby sat down next to me and took my hands in her hands. “Lauren, you only have two more years and that’s it. Then you’ll be back in Mason, working on your daddy’s ranch and Colt will be by your side.”

  Nodding my head, I took in a shaky breath. “I know. I know, Libby. Believe me I keep telling myself that.”

  Reaching over, Libby pushed a piece of my blonde hair behind my ear. “Colt said your grades are amazing.”

  Chewing on my lower lip, I whispered, “I have a four point zero grade average.”

  Libby laughed. “You’re with Colt, sweetie, and you both only have two more years. Take it a semester at a time and I promise it will go by fast. Look, Alex, Will, and Maegan have just this year. It’s gone by fast.”

  Nodding my head, I knew Libby was right. There was no way I could leave school, and leave Colt behind. Plus, my father would chain me to a desk at A&M and make me stay there.

  “I promise to take it a semester at a time.”

  Libby smiled and stood up. “Good. Now that we’ve got that taken care of, are you ready for the wedding?”

  Jumping up and down and letting out a squeal, I clapped my hands. “Yes! Yes! Yes! It’s finally here. Seems like forever ago they got engaged.”

  Libby and I started walking back over to the party. It was a small get together with just a few friends from high school that we had invited. Libby and I talked about last-minute details that we were taking care of for Alex. My eyes caught a glimpse of someone and I looked to see it was, Rachel. Colt’s ex-girlfriend. What in the hell was she doing here? She was talking to Colt and kept putting her hand on his arm. Balling up my fists, I stared at them.

  Libby kept talking but I heard nothing. Nothing but the sound of my blood rushing through my veins as I watched Colt throw his head back and laugh at something she said.

  “Lauren? Hello, Earth to Lauren? Are you even listening to me?”

  “No, I’m not because I’m too busy looking at the little slut who’s talking to Colt.”

  Grace walked up next to me and laughed. “Oh man, I love that you’re turning more and more like me as the days go by.”

  “That truly does concern me,” Libby said.

  Holding up my hands to them both I shouted, “Hush up!”

  Why is he laughing? What does he find so funny? If she touches him one more time I’m going to rip her eyes out.

  Hot breath was near my neck as Grace whispered, “I’m going to safely say you’re currently thinking you want to rip her hair out.”

  Swallowing hard, I whispered, “Her eyes.”

  Grace chuckled. “Lauren, take a deep breath and let it out. Colt loves you and only you. She knows by talking to him she’s gonna get under your skin.”

  Dragging in a deep breath, I slowly blew it out as I released my fists. Right about that moment, Colt’s eyes found mine. I could almost see the blue in his eyes from where I was standing. Moving my eyes back to his face, they landed on his lips. The same lips that had kissed my body tenderly last night as Colt made love to me under the stars again in the bed of his truck, our new favorite place to be.

  Grace whispered in my ear, “Do you see how he’s looking at you, Lauren? His whole face lit up the moment he saw you. Baby girl, you have nothing to worry about.”

  Smiling, I nodded my head. “I know,” I whispered.

  Giving me a nudge, Grace said, “Now get over there and show that little bitch who Colt belongs to.”

  Turning to Grace, I quickly hugged her. “I love you, Grace.”

  Holding me tighter her voice cracked as she spoke. “I love you too, Lauren.”

  Dropping her hold on me, Grace took a step back. Turning, I made my way over to Colt. Rachel was talking to him as he kept his eyes on me the entire time I walked over to him. As I got closer I remembered the last time I approached him like this. He was looking at me the same way he did the day of Luke and Libby’s wedding. My heart began to beat faster in my chest as I stopped right in front of him.

  “Hey,” I whispered.

  Giving me that panty-melting grin of his, my knees went weak as a rush of goose bumps covered my entire body.

  The crooked smile grew bigger as Colt took a step closer to me. “Hey, sweetheart.”

  Rachel stopped talking as Colt pulled me into his arms. “I was wondering where the most beautiful girl in the pasture was.”

  Letting out a soft chuckle, I turned to Rachel. “Oh hey there, Rachel. I didn’t see you there.”

  Rachel gave me a dirty look, but quickly turned it to a smile when Colt looked at her.

  That’s right. He’s mine bitch so just move along. Move. Along.

  “Lauren, how are you?”

  An evil thought entered my mind. Do I ignore said thought? No. No I don’t think I should.

  Giving a fake, but believable laugh, I looked at Colt, then back to Rachel as I let out a breath. “Well, I’m tired but that’s to be expected. You know, first trimester and all.”

  Peeking back to Colt, his smile dropped and I actually could see the color drain from his face. Swallowing hard, Colt said, “W-what?”

  Rachel also asked what. But her what was more of a shout.

  “What? What do you mean? Oh my God. Are you?”

  My eyes were still on Rachel, but I was watching Colt out of the corner of my eye as he leaned closer to me. “Lauren, baby, I need to talk to you.”

  It was taking everything I had not to bust out laughing. Rachel was now falling over her words as she attempted to ask me how far along I was.

  “When . . . is the baby . . . don’t you think you’re a little young?”

  Placing her hands on her hips she looked between Colt and me.

  Tipping my head to the side, I placed my fingertips on my partially opened mouth. “Well, I don’t know what my age has to do with anything.”

  Colt pulled on my arm. “Um, Lauren can I speak with you for a second?”

  Snarling her lip up at me, Rachel shook her head. “Your parents must be utterly disappointed with you.”

  Colt stepped in-between us. Oh man. This was just too fun watching Rachel get her panties in a twist.

  Looking around Colt, I asked, “Why do you say that, Rachel? My father is extremely proud that my first attempt at breeding was successful,” I said with a wicked smile.

  “What?” Rachel and Colt said at the same time. Colt pushed me away from Rachel. “Baby, I really think you and I need to talk.”

  Leaning in I kissed Colt on the lips softly but quickly. “Colt, I’m just happy about Mia being pregnant. I thought you were, too?”

  Biting on my lower lip, I tired like hell to keep in my laughter. Taking a peek at Rachel, I saw the confused look on her face.

  “Wait. What?” Colt said as relief washed over his face. Then he smiled. A really big smile that made my stomach flip. “Mia’s pregnant?”

  Smiling, I nodded my head and said, “Yep. My mom confirmed it this morning.”

  Pulling me into a hug and lifting me up, Colt spun me around. “Sweetheart, this is wonderful!”

  Setting me back down, Colt placed his hands on the sides of my face as his thumbs brushed across my skin leaving a fiery wake in their path. “Lauren, I’m so damn proud of you.” Leaning in closer, his lips brushed against my neck as he moved them up to my ear and whispered, “And you totally had me second-guessing our decision about no more condoms.”

  The moment his lips touched mine, I forgot everything and everyone. My hands reached up and held onto his arms as my knees wobbled. Colt’s tongue danced in perfect harmony with mine as he deepened the kiss with a moan.

  Rachel cleared her throat. “Um. Hello, you know I’m still standing here.”

  Colt pulled his lips back and whispered, “I love you so much.”

  Looking into his eyes I was lost within the moment we shared. Lost in his beautiful blue eyes that seemed to sparkle when he smiled. Lost in his blissful love.

  “Take me to our spot,
Colt,” I said, barely above a whisper. Before I knew it, Colt was carrying me to his truck and we were on our way to our secret spot where we spent the rest of the night wrapped up in each other’s arms.

  “OKAY, IT LOOKS like I’m gonna have to be the one to say this. Alex is bridezilla. There. I said it.”

  Everyone turned and looked at Taylor. Raising her eyebrows and dropping her mouth open she asked, “Am I wrong?”

  Maegan started laughing. “Hell no you’re not wrong, baby sister. You’re just the only one brave enough to say it out loud.”

  Shaking my head, I turned back around and finished putting the flowers in Grace’s hair. “Cut her some slack, y’all. She’s been really stressed. Weren’t you stressed with your wedding, Libby?”

  Libby chuckled. “It all happened too fast for me to get stressed.” Libby twisted Maegan’s hair up and began putting bobby pins in. “God, Meg, I’d kill to have your hair.”

  Maegan rolled her eyes. “I hate my hair. I wish Tay had gotten the auburn hair and I got the brown.”

  “Dye it,” I said as I placed the last flower in Grace’s hair.

  Turning, I looked at Maegan. “Seriously, why don’t you just change the color then?”

  Maegan started chewing on her lower lip. “You think?”

  Grace leaned forward and put more lipstick on. “Hell yeah, you should! Shake things up a little. Maybe it will throw the little bitches off at your school, too.”

  We all started laughing. Then someone knocked on the door and we fell silent. “It’s her!” Taylor whispered as she moved away from the door with a look of fear on her face.

  Brushing Taylor off with my hand, I moved to the door. Opening the door, my mouth fell open. Alex stood in the hallway. “Alex? Honey, are you okay?” She was just standing there, looking lost. Very lost. Reaching for her hand I looked up and down the hallway before I pulled her into the guestroom. We were in Gunner and Ellie’s house since the wedding was right outside in their backyard practically.

  “Alex, sweetie, what’s wrong?” Libby asked as she walked up to Alex and led her over to the desk chair. We all gathered around Alex.