The Long Way Home

by Rachel Spangler

  She had fought so hard to forget this place. Sure, she liked to think she could face it now and stand strong in the face of criticism, but why should she have to? Why would she willingly subject herself to their disdain, to their whispered accusations or outright condemnation? That wasn’t her idea of a good time. No, she’d rather spend her night cooped up inside watching the St. Louis Cardinals game. The Redbirds were one of the few things from her childhood that hadn’t betrayed her.

  Just after eight o’clock Raine heard a knock at the door. Even through the distortion of the peephole’s curved glass, she could clearly make out Beth in her softball attire. She opened the door and grinned in spite of her apprehension.

  “We won,” Beth said with a smile. “I thought you’d like to know since you didn’t see any of the game.”

  “About that...” Raine didn’t have an excuse. “Do you want to come in?”

  Beth looked around the empty apartment and said in a mocking tone, “I don’t know. You seem awfully busy, but yeah, do you mind if I have a quick shower?”

  “Shower?”

  “Yeah, I’ll change here before we go out.”

  “Out?”

  “Is there an echo in here?” Beth asked as she headed for the bedroom. Rory followed her as far as the threshold and then rested against the doorway as Beth tossed a duffel bag onto the unmade bed. “Doesn’t make sense to go all the way back to my house when we can leave from here.”

  “Okay, I’ll bite. Where are we going?”

  “To the fall festival,” Beth said casually, but Raine noticed she didn’t meet her eyes. She obviously knew that statement wouldn’t go over well. “Now, do you mind if I shower? I don’t want to get my clean clothes all sweaty.”

  “Sure,” Raine said with a chuckle and closed the door before she headed back to the couch.

  This little drop-in didn’t seem like Beth’s style. She was sweet, quiet, and well-mannered. Then again, a week ago, Raine thought Beth was straight. Perhaps there was more to little Beth Devoroux than her good-girl image suggested. For one, she certainly didn’t come across as a frumpy librarian in her softball shorts and her T-shirt that showed enough of her cleavage to make Raine’s eyes wander. She also wasn’t too timid or closeted to barge into Raine’s apartment and ask to use the shower. Holy shit, Beth is in my shower.

  Raine paced around the living room, flashing back to the way she’d invited herself into the shower with Patty. Instead she pictured Beth with her long dark curls dripping wet and cascading down her gorgeous body under the spray. Knowing that dream was only a few feet away made her a little dizzy, so she sat back down and rubbed her face viciously as if trying to wipe away the images.

  She had to pull herself together. Despite her recent show of bravado, Beth was sweet and innocent, not to mention in a relationship. She was clearly here to drag Raine out of her solitude, but probably had no other motives for her visit. Raine was the one who’d sexualized her actions. Beth hadn’t indicated that she was offering anything more than friendship.

  Raine forced her mind back to the central question of the evening. How could she get out of going to the fall festival? If the softball games had been daunting, the fall festival was the fifth circle of hell. The festival, held in the center of Darlington, consisted of everything from craft booths to street vendors to pony rides. It was the epitome of small-town life, and all of Darlington would be there, either taking in the food and festivities or socializing in the bars and restaurants that ran specials to entice them. She refused to subject herself to all of her nightmares magnified by the influence of alcohol and mob mentality.

  The shower stopped, and Raine heard Beth moving around in the bedroom. She tiptoed to the door with no intention of opening it, but she couldn’t ignore the thought of Beth in there dressing. How was she supposed to concentrate on getting out of the evening’s entertainment if she couldn’t think about anything but Beth in her bedroom? Maybe that was part of Beth’s plan, to be so alluring that Raine couldn’t refuse her invitation.

  No, that was silly. Raine knew plenty of women who’d use that ploy, but Beth wasn’t one of them. Beth was watching out for her, trying to play social director. For some reason she’d put it upon herself to see that Raine got out, and she was attempting to do so right now, but it wouldn’t work.

  Raine refused to be bullied or pushed or even persuaded to do something she didn’t want to. She was strong in her convictions. She’d stood up to stronger forces than Beth Devoroux. Her fortitude had made her famous in the first place. Who did Beth think she was, barging in with her sexy legs, peeks of her cleavage, and her innocent femme persona? Raine wouldn’t fold like a rag doll. She didn’t let anyone tell her where to go, did she?

  If she were being honest, she’d have to admit that Beth had convinced her to go see her parents, and Beth had taken her to the store. And see how well those things went for you?

  Another knock at the door. “What the hell?” Raine mumbled.

  “That’ll be Tyler,” Beth called from the bedroom.

  Raine opened the door. “Are you here to drag me out too?”

  “Beth thought she might need reinforcements,” Tyler said with a grin and brushed past her into the apartment.

  “And does our little doe-eyed Mata Hari have any other surprises for me tonight?” Raine raised her voice so she could be heard through the bedroom door.

  Tyler made himself comfortable much the same way he’d done when they were lounging in each other’s living rooms as teenagers. “Either we get you to go to the fall festival with us or call people and tell them to meet us over here.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “Yeah, who wants to have a party in family housing, right?”

  Raine couldn’t believe what was happening. The anger she hadn’t quite been able to muster finally welled up inside her. She had to stop this. Beth had crossed the line from busy-body to bully. Good intentions or not, Raine didn’t appreciate being pressured into doing something she wasn’t ready for.

  “You should sit down, buddy,” Tyler said, seeming oblivious to the tension in the room. “Women need forever to get ready. I thought you’d know that by now.”

  Raine started for the bedroom door. She’d had enough of this little charade and planned to stop it, right now. “She won’t be getting ready for anything when I get done with—” Raine stopped. “What?”

  Tyler yawned. “I thought you were some kind of big shot with the ladies, but you act like you’ve never had to wait while a woman powdered her nose or tried on seven different pairs of shoes.”

  “You know I’m gay?”

  Tyler laughed. “Only since you were like fourteen.”

  “What? How?” Raine was stupefied.

  “You never wanted to date me, and I was the most popular guy in school. Besides, you were the only girl I knew who could hit my curveball.”

  Raine didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “Why didn’t you say something?”

  “It wasn’t my place. I figured you’d talk about it when you were ready.” He sat up and shrugged. “I didn’t think it would take you damn near fifteen years, though.”

  Raine sank down onto the couch and tried to sort out this new development. She’d assumed Tyler didn’t know she was gay and would turn against her when he found out. But not only did he know now, he’d known in high school. The entire time they were friends, he’d been friends with her for who she really was, not the image she tried to project. It didn’t make sense.

  Beth opened the bedroom door and stood there expectantly. “Ready to go?” Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail with a few stray tendrils framing her face. She wore a tight pair of Wranglers and a blue button-down that set off her eyes. She looked every bit like a farmer’s daughter, the perfect blend of sweet and sexy. Raine gulped, but didn’t trust herself to speak. So much for being strong and defiant. She couldn’t even remember her reasons for not going out, much less articulate them.

  “What?�
�� Beth asked. It was the first time she’d shown even a hint of insecurity, and Raine immediately regretted causing it.

  “Nothing.” She forced a smile. “I know when I’m beaten.”

  Tyler slapped her on the back. “Good. Let’s go before you have the chance to change your mind.”

  “One beer, then I’m going home.” Raine attempted to regain some semblance of control over the situation, but as Beth and Tyler both chuckled, she was afraid she was in for a long night.

  *

  Beth was glad for the dim light as Tyler drove them to town in his rusty Dodge pickup. She’d hid her trembling hands by keeping some distance between herself and Rory, but now that they were in such close proximity she feared her lack of confidence would show. She had used all her courage to buzz into Rory’s apartment and act like she belonged there, when in reality she was so nervous she’d stood outside the door for ten minutes before she worked up the energy to knock. She’d never been the one to take charge, and she worried that she’d be incapable of doing so tonight, which is why she’d called Tyler for backup.

  She wanted to help Rory move past her fear, and that wouldn’t happen as long as Rory insisted on staying walled up in that apartment. She felt responsible for bringing her back to Darlington, and she couldn’t live with the thought of her being miserable because of it. If that meant Beth had to stretch out of her comfort zone in order to get Rory out of her own shell, then that’s what she’d do. And she had. She’d marched in and told Rory they were going out like it was a foregone conclusion, even though she was anything but certain of that herself.

  Rory, for her part, was easier to convince than she’d expected. She was obviously surprised at first, but while Beth was in the shower she expected Rory to plan her escape. Thankfully, Tyler had arrived in time to offer some moral support. What had they talked about? When she opened the door, all Rory had done was stare at her. That didn’t seem like the Rory she knew, but neither of them had been herself tonight.

  Tyler parked the truck a few blocks from the town square, and they joined the steady stream of people heading toward the festival. Rory didn’t speak as she walked with Beth beside her and Tyler a few steps in front of them. Tension practically radiated from her, and Beth wanted to squeeze her hand, but that would be pushing it too far. Even as a friendly gesture it would raise suspicions, and while she wasn’t as paranoid as Kelly, she wasn’t eager to draw attention to her sexual orientation.

  Strange, she hadn’t thought of Kelly all night. Kelly would definitely disapprove of what she was doing, but that didn’t matter. Rory needed a friend, and Kelly said she didn’t want Beth’s company tonight. Beth was still angry with her. She understood and respected Kelly’s reasons for being cautious, but that didn’t give her the right to tell her who she should be friends with. Surely Kelly would come around eventually and see that Rory wasn’t a threat. Until then, Beth intended to hold her ground, and that included enjoying herself tonight.

  Beth snuck a glance at Rory. She was beautiful. Her chestnut hair feathered lightly to one side, and her broad shoulders squared, adding a sense of purpose to her solid gait. She might be shaking inside, but no one would know. She was absolutely stunning.

  “Did you eat yet?” Tyler asked when they got to the town square. Rows of booths on either side of them touted everything from crafts to corn dogs.

  Rory shook her head. “No, I’m not really hungry.”

  Beth didn’t feel like eating anything either, but Tyler shoved through the crowd before she could say anything.

  “No drinking on an empty stomach,” he called over his shoulder. “Let’s get some chili.”

  “Right, because mixing alcohol and chili is always a good idea,” Beth said, but the comment only made him laugh as he continued his push through the crowd.

  They entered one of the restaurants that lined the square, and Tyler secured them a table before heading off to the bar. “You okay?” Beth asked Rory.

  Rory scanned the room, her emerald eyes pausing on each face as if checking for threats, then chose a seat with her back to the wall. “Sure, I’m fine.”

  Beth felt for her. Rory was obviously nervous, and it must be exhausting to always be waiting for the next fight. She needed to relax. She was better company when she was unguarded, and she was definitely more attractive when she flashed her rakish grins instead of the tight line her mouth and set jaw were currently forming. No one in this jovial crowd would try to start a fight tonight. She edged close enough to Rory to smell her cologne and inhaled it deeply. “You can loosen up. Tyler and I are right here, and a lot of people will be happy to see you tonight.”

  As if on cue, Tyler came back carrying two beers and two small cups of chili, and following him was another high-school classmate, Chris Bennett, holding an identical order.

  “Hey, stranger,” Chris said, setting a beer and a container of chili in front of Raine. He hadn’t changed a bit. He was still a lanky farm boy, his sandy hair tucked under a ball cap and his faded jeans marked with a Copenhagen ring. “I heard you were back in town, but I had to see it to believe it.”

  “Hi, Chris,” Rory said. “How’re you?”

  “Not bad, how ’bout yourself?”

  “Hanging in there.” Rory held up the beer bottle. “Thanks for this.”

  “It’s my pleasure to buy a beer for a local celebrity.”

  Rory grimaced slightly and took a big swig. She probably wasn’t eager to discuss her celebrity status with the people she’d put down in her writing, and Beth didn’t blame her. Many of their former classmates read Raine’s early work out of the novelty of knowing someone famous, but the stories never reflected well on their hometown.

  It was ironic that Rory had such negative memories of her time in Darlington, because everyone Beth knew had nothing but fond memories of her. She’d been almost universally liked, outgoing, athletic, fun, and charismatic. To find out that she didn’t feel the same way about people who cared about her stung at first, but the general opinion seemed to be that it was better to be mentioned in a negative light than to never be famous at all.

  “How’s your mama, Chris?” Beth asked, shifting the subject away from Rory.

  “She’s okay, but I think she’s driving Daddy a little crazy. She got a new knee last month,” he clarified for Rory.

  “Maybe I’ll stop over and see them tomorrow.”

  “She’d love that, Beth. You know she adores you, and she’s going crazy without all the church-choir gossip.” Chris laughed. “What about your folks, Rory?”

  Beth cursed herself for opening the topic of parents. She should’ve known it would work its way back around to Rory, and she’d have to explain that she still wasn’t speaking to her family. As frustrated as Rory’s attitude toward her parents made Beth, a crowded restaurant wasn’t the place to readdress that subject.

  “They’re all right,” Rory said levelly, then swallowed another drink of beer. “I had dinner with them the other night, and they were in a tizzy about the dry weather.”

  Chris and Tyler both chuckled, but Beth could hardly contain her shock. Rory went to see her parents? Even had dinner with them? And on Sunday, the same day she and Beth had fought about them. Why hadn’t she mentioned it sooner?

  “Your daddy’s got to be cursing the drought as much as mine is. It can’t be any better on his corn crops than it is on our soybeans.”

  The conversation turned to crops, with Chris and Tyler doing most of the talking, so Beth took the opportunity to watch Rory, who had a bite of her chili and killed her beer before scanning the room again. With her frown and furrowed brow, she appeared older, like the burdens she carried had actually stolen her youth. Despite her nonchalance about her parents, the topic obviously heightened her paranoia. Maybe the St. James family reunion hadn’t gone as well as Rory implied, but why wouldn’t she have told Beth? It would’ve been a great chance to prove that she was wrong. Then again, if it had gone well, why wasn’t she happier about
it? Something was off. Beth could sense it, but she didn’t have time to figure it out now.

  The waitress brought another round of drinks, though Beth wasn’t even half done with her first. Rory, on the other hand, kept up with the guys, taking a swig of beer with every bite of chili. Maybe the food was too spicy for her, but maybe she was using the alcohol to help bolster her confidence. She had no idea how much beer Rory could handle, but Chris and Tyler weren’t likely to stop feeding her drinks anytime soon. The descent into drunkenness was a male-bonding ritual Beth didn’t understand and didn’t care to witness tonight, especially since Rory had so many unresolved issues in town.

  Beth wanted Rory to relax, but not numb herself, and it was up to her to get them out of the situation. Rory needed a clear head to navigate the various social situations over the course of the evening, and if she wasn’t ready to acknowledge that, Beth would do it for her.

  “Drink up, boys,” she said cheerfully. “That’s your last one for now. I want to shop at the craft booths.”

  “Damn,” Tyler muttered as he downed his second beer. “What is it with women and your need to buy cheap crap you’ve already got too much of to begin with?”

  “I do it to torture you,” Beth said with a grin, and ushered them out the door, making an effort to lay a comforting hand on Rory’s shoulder as they exited the restaurant.

  *

  The temperature dropped slightly when night fell, and the crowd began to thin as the elderly and families went home, leaving the festival to teenagers and young adults. Raine remembered roaming the streets of town as an adolescent. She and her friends didn’t have much to do for entertainment, so they spent a lot of time loitering on the town square. They’d anticipated festivals like this one to spice up their dull routines.