The Afterlife Academy

by Frank L. Cole

  “You can’t see it,” Charlie said as he held up the invisible whistle. “But this is a Feral Whistle. We use it to control animals.”

  “So what you’re saying is you have been possessed by an…um…an angel?” his mother asked.

  “Tell her I’m not an angel, I’m an Agent. A-gent,” Walter said firmly.

  “That will just confuse her,” Charlie answered.

  “This can’t be good,” Charlie’s mother whimpered. “Does he make you do things you shouldn’t?”

  Charlie opened his mouth and then closed it. She had a point. “No, Mom, it’s nothing like that. He’s actually a good guy.”

  “But why? Why would this spirit…”

  “Walter,” Charlie said. “His name’s Walter.”

  “Right, Walter. If he’s so good, why would he possess you? Maybe we should call one of those hotlines. What do you think, Martin? Do you know someone who could help Charlie?”

  Mr. Dewdle, not looking away from the birds, grunted and shook his head. “I don’t like any of this. It’s not natural.”

  “Charlie, buddy, I hate to break up this family moment, but how long do you think ol’ blue Doris is going to hold up? We need to get moving to a safer place,” Walter said. “Like, now!”

  “I know, I know. I think I have a good idea of where to go.” Charlie clicked on the Chat with Wisdom link on SpiritSpy.org and typed a brief message.

  Wisdom, we need to meet. Are you there?

  “Who’s Wisdom?” Mr. Dewdle whispered to his wife. “Sounds like a creep.”

  “He’s one of Charlie’s friends, dear. I’m sure he’s fine.”

  “But why doesn’t he hang out with real people at his school?” Mr. Dewdle asked. “Why does he have to type to imaginary people on the Internet?”

  “I’m in the room.” Charlie covered his eyes with his hand. “I can hear you!”

  A response blipped on the screen.

  Charlie!

  All is well, I hope. I’d love to meet. Are you attending the Wraith Festival?

  Yes, Charlie typed. Where are you staying?

  Out of the corner of his eye, Charlie saw Darcy waving her hand in front of one of the canaries. The bird gave no response even when she poked it in the chest with her finger.

  “Please don’t touch them, dork,” Charlie scolded.

  Darcy stuck out her tongue and scowled.

  “I love your family,” Walter said.

  I’m at the Ritz-Carlton in Conrad. Room 406. Here’s a link for the directions. Will you be bringing the book?

  “Ask him about the torch,” Walter said.

  Charlie nodded as he typed.

  Yep. Do you have a Chamber Torch we can use?

  From outside the study door, a single dog barked. Darcy checked beneath the door and giggled. “It’s the cocker spaniel. Can we let him in? I think he’s friendly.” Charlie’s parents shook their heads. “Awww!” Darcy huffed and stomped her foot.

  Wisdom responded.

  Yes, I brought one in case you got my email in time and could come. When should I expect you?

  “Good question,” Walter said. “Is there a bus you can take from here to Conrad, Minnesota?”

  Charlie gnawed on his lip and slowly looked up at his parents. “Do you think you could drive me?”

  Mrs. Dewdle knelt down next to Charlie. “If you need to go to Conrad, I could probably rearrange my schedule tomorrow. When do you need to go?”

  Charlie clenched his teeth and fretted. “Um…now.”

  “Now? Like right now? Charlie, it’s almost nine o’clock. Can’t it wait until tomorrow?”

  “No, Mom, it can’t. I don’t think we’ll survive until tomorrow.”

  “Don’t be so dramatic.”

  “I’m serious. You saw what just happened.” Charlie walked to the window and opened the blinds, instantly cowering away from the sight. “And you can’t see them, but right outside this window are two creatures called wraiths that want to kill us. All of us!” He closed the blinds, and the wraiths began scratching their claws once more against the glass.

  “That’s obnoxious,” Walter muttered.

  Charlie’s mom puffed out her cheeks and tapped her lip with her index finger. “It’s a festival?”

  “Yes. It’s called the Wraith Festival. Wisdom Willows will be there, and he’ll know what to do with the book. Please, Mom, I’m begging you.” Charlie clamped his hands together pleadingly.

  Mrs. Dewdle looked at her husband. “What do you think?”

  He didn’t answer, but Charlie’s sister started hopping up and down excitedly. “I want to go! I want to go! Please, Mom, please!”

  “Darcy, shush!” Mrs. Dewdle snapped. She stood and placed her hand on her husband’s forearm. “Dear, we should probably do as Charlie says. It sounds serious.”

  Mr. Dewdle blinked. “Do we have to dress up?”

  Charlie, his mother, and his sister stood on the main level of the apartment complex, staring out the back-door window. Charlie’s dad sat in the driver’s seat of the idling family SUV beneath the covered parking lot, drumming his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel. Above the apartment, dive-bombing the remaining dogs from the Kindhearted Veterinary Clinic, Charlie’s canaries and finches darted through the air, each of them still entranced by the Feral Whistle. So far, no injuries had befallen any of his pets, but Charlie worried one of the larger dogs, a Doberman pinscher or a greyhound, was bound to catch a bird in its snapping jaws.

  Mr. Dewdle honked the horn and rolled his hand in the air, signaling the family to get moving.

  “Yes, dear, we’re coming!” Charlie’s mom said, exaggerating the words so that her husband could see her mouth. “Charlie, what are we waiting for?”

  Charlie checked the sky for signs of wraiths. When they had exited the study, the creepy specters were still scraping the window with their claws. He just hoped they wouldn’t figure out the plan.

  “Do you think they’re going to try to ambush us?” Walter whispered.

  “It looks clear. I don’t see them,” Charlie said. “And we can’t stay here.”

  “Are you talking to Walter right now?” Charlie’s mom asked. Charlie nodded. “What’s he saying?”

  “He’s worried the wraiths might ambush us.”

  She frowned. “Now, you listen to me, Walter!” Her voice boomed in Charlie’s ear. “Stop scaring my son!”

  “Mom, you don’t have to yell!”

  Walter laughed. “Your mom’s a trip. Is she always this…odd?”

  “She means well.”

  “What’s he saying now?” his mom demanded.

  “Nothing.”

  Charlie’s dad blared the horn once more, stuck his head out the car window, and yelled, “Let’s go!”

  The three of them, plus Walter, reached the vehicle without incident. Charlie’s mom sat in the front next to his father, and Darcy sat crammed against the far window, cautiously watching Charlie as though she feared a ghost would pop out of him at any minute. The SUV lurched onto the road, and the dogs scattered. Though they nipped and barked at one another, keeping their eyes on the sky in search of the birds, Charlie could no longer see the faint glow in the dogs’ eyes.

  “Where is this place again?” Charlie’s dad asked. “In Conrad?”

  “Yes, Dad. Wisdom’s staying at the Ritz-Carlton.” Charlie handed him the address. Charlie’s dad shook his head, sighing, but typed the information into the car’s GPS and started driving.

  The two red figures floating by the apartment window suddenly turned and swooshed toward the road.

  “Man, they can move!” Walter said. “They’re going to catch us!”

  “Faster, Dad, faster!” Charlie shouted as the wraiths flew behind the SUV, their claws outstretched, raking the bumper.

  “I can’t go more than thirty. This is a neighborhood.” He glanced sideways at his wife. “This is ridiculous,” he hissed under his breath.

  “Just do it.” Charl
ie’s mom nudged her husband’s arm with her hand.

  Mr. Dewdle shrugged. “We’re going to get pulled over. But…” He stepped heavily on the gas pedal, and the SUV sped forward.

  Forty miles per hour. Fifty. Then sixty, and seventy. Charlie watched the needle on the speedometer rise as the gap between the rear bumper and the two determined wraiths widened. When the SUV hit eighty miles per hour, the wraiths surrendered their chase and disappeared from view.

  “That’s about all she’ll give us,” Mr. Dewdle said. “This kind of SUV isn’t made to go more than eighty.”

  “It’s okay, we lost them,” Charlie said.

  Charlie’s mom ran her fingers through the hair at the back of his dad’s head and smiled. “You did good, sweetie. You’ll have to slow down a little when we hit the junction, though. You don’t want to miss the turnoff to the Chapmans’. Boy, will I hear about this at the next PTA meeting. Taking Charlie to a festival and allowing Darcy to sleep over at the last minute. It’s going to take a lot of explaining to keep those women quiet.”

  “Mom, I don’t want to go to the Chapmans’!” Darcy whined. “I want to go with you guys to the festival!”

  “We’ll probably need to stop for gas too.” Charlie’s mom ignored Darcy’s pleading. “Plus, I need to use the restroom.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me,” Walter groaned.

  “Mom, you’re just going to have to hold it,” Charlie said.

  Conrad, Minnesota’s claim to fame was that it had the largest outdoor ice-skating rink in the continental United States. It also had not one but two goat-milking farms. Regardless of those two pages in the three-page visitor’s pamphlet available at all rest stops and gas stations between Conrad and Gabbiter, the attraction on the third page was the town’s most popular.

  The annual Wraith Festival.

  Hundreds of costume-wearing paranormal fans were flooding the quiet streets of Conrad. Decorated floats of haunted houses, tombstones, and every frightening creature imaginable were parked along the curb awaiting the next morning’s parade.

  “What a crock!” Charlie’s dad grumbled as he negotiated the SUV through the tight space between two parade floats. “Who are all these freaks?”

  Charlie kept quiet in the back. He had always dreamed of attending the festival. But at the moment, he couldn’t enjoy the sights. He and Walter needed to work out the particulars of their grand scheme.

  “Okay, we’re going to have to be extra careful out there,” Walter said. “With everyone dressed up in cloaks and hoods, it’ll be hard knowing whether or not we’re about to be attacked by wraiths.”

  “I know,” Charlie whispered. “What about my parents?”

  “What about them?”

  “Should they go in there with me?”

  “It’s not the worst idea. At least they’ll know if something bad happens.”

  “We’re coming with you, whether Walter likes it or not.” Charlie’s mom glared from the front seat. “It’s not an option.”

  “Relax, Mom, he wants you guys to come.”

  “Oh.” She wiggled her nose and half smiled.

  Charlie’s dad looked disgusted. “Would you stop talking about this Walter kid? Please?” He steered into a public parking lot and turned off the car.

  Among the hundreds, possibly thousands of Wraith Festival attendees, the Dewdles stood out like a coffee stain on a pair of perfectly white slacks.

  “Don’t get too far ahead of us, Charlie!” Charlie’s mom shouted above the noisy street. “And don’t talk to any”—she recoiled at the sight of an eight-foot-tall, fur-covered man walking on stilts—“any, er, strangers. Oh my, what exactly are you supposed to be?” she asked the man. He released a guttural growl, staying true to character.

  “Come on, Dana!” Mr. Dewdle urged. “This whole town’s been taken over by crazies.”

  They arrived at the Ritz-Carlton hotel, but a crowd of people had surrounded the entrance. Masked demons and ghouls chanted and held up signs that said WISDOM FOR PRESIDENT and KING OF THE WRAITH FESTIVAL.

  “How are we supposed to get in there?” Walter asked. Several police officers stood at the parking lot entrance, preventing anyone from getting through.

  “I guess we could ask,” Charlie suggested. He pressed through the throngs of fans. “Excuse me. Excuse me!” he asked one of the officers.

  “Yeah, kid, what is it?”

  “I need to get in there to see Wisdom Willows,” Charlie explained.

  “Right. You and the rest of these people. Look, if you’re not on the list, you’re not getting in.”

  “My name’s Charlie Dewdle. I don’t think I’m on the list, but I know Wisdom would want to see me.”

  The officer smirked. “Sure, kid. Whatever.”

  “Well, this was a waste of time,” Charlie said to his parents. “They’re only letting people in who are on some list.”

  “And you’re not on the list?” his mom asked.

  “Of course he’s not on the list, Dana.” His dad threw his hands up in frustration.

  “Charlie, look over there,” Walter said.

  Charlie flinched. “Look over where?”

  “To your left. Is that who I think it is?”

  Charlie turned to see who Walter was talking about and his mouth fell open. The girl standing a few people over looked shockingly familiar. She was wearing a long black robe and a witch’s hat, but there was no doubt it was her.

  “Melissa?” he called.

  Melissa turned her head, and a confused look formed on her face.

  “Go over there!” Walter urged.

  Charlie asked his parents to stay put, then nervously walked over to Melissa.

  “Charlie? I didn’t know you were here at the festival.”

  “We…uh…just showed up.”

  “It’s amazing, huh? I come every year. I heard they sold more tickets this year than the past three festivals combined.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding me,” Walter muttered. “She’s a freak, just like you!”

  “I didn’t know you liked this sort of thing.” Charlie couldn’t believe it. Melissa Bitner was into paranormal stuff? How did he not know this? They had gone to the same school since kindergarten.

  Melissa gnawed on the inside of her cheek. “Yeah, well, it’s kind of a secret. Only a few people know about it.”

  “Oh, right. I won’t tell a soul,” Charlie promised.

  She giggled. “Don’t worry. I don’t care that much. Some of my friends already know.”

  “Are they here too?” Charlie’s head darted around, searching for the other popular girls.

  “Are you serious? They wouldn’t be caught dead in a place like this. Can you imagine Sydney Mullins wearing a costume?”

  Charlie shook his head.

  “Sydney Mullins? Haven’t met her yet, but she sounds like the kinda girl I’d rather hang out with,” Walter said.

  “Hey, I’m sorry about the other day.” Melissa touched Charlie’s arm. “You know, when I snapped at you for breaking Mo’s hand?”

  “Oh yeah, don’t worry about it,” Charlie managed.

  “I know he probably deserved it, but I just”—she pursed her lips—“I just can’t stand bullies and violence. I hated that you stooped to his level.”

  “It was a one-time thing,” Charlie said.

  Someone exited the hotel, and the crowd erupted, but it was a false alarm.

  “He’s supposed to make some sort of speech,” Melissa said. “At least, that’s what he said on his website. Wisdom Willows, that is.”

  “Who else is staying in the hotel?” Charlie wondered.

  “There was a dinner earlier,” Melissa explained. “Really ritzy. I think the tickets were like a thousand dollars apiece just to get in. Hey, this is awesome! Now we’ll have something else to talk about at school other than our Spanish teachers.”

  Charlie felt his knees wanting to knock together. “Uh-huh.”

  “Hey, l
over boy?” Walter spoke up. “We should probably find another way in to see Wisdom.”

  Charlie nodded quickly. “So, what are you doing here at the hotel?”

  Melissa pointed to her cardboard sign. She had painted the words MARRY ME, WISDOM! across the front. “It’s just a joke. I mean, he’s old, eww, but Wisdom Willows is amazing!”

  “Yeah, he’s a paranormal icon!” Charlie agreed.

  “I know! I saw him arrive this afternoon in a black limousine. It’s parked toward the rear of the hotel. If he doesn’t come out this entrance soon, I’m going to see if he comes out the back way. Then my sister will take me in her car to follow him.” She pointed to an older girl a little ways off. “She doesn’t have a choice. I covered for her last week when she snuck out on a school night with her boyfriend to Lavender Falls. If my parents ever found out, she’d lose her cell phone and her car keys. She owes me.”

  “I’m actually here to see Wisdom myself.”

  She smiled. “You and everyone else.”

  “No. I have an appointment.” Charlie glanced over and saw the police officer he had spoken to earlier, motioning for him to approach the gate.

  “You’re kidding, right?” she asked, baffled.

  “Charlie Dewdle?” the officer called out above the surging crowd. “Mr. Willows will see you now.”

  “What?” Melissa squealed. “Oh my gosh! What’s it about? How did you get an appointment with Wisdom Willows?”

  Charlie felt his skin prickle with goose bumps. “I’ll have to tell you later. Where are you going to be in an hour or so?”

  “Where do you think?” She grinned mischievously.

  “Right! If you’re still around, I’ll find you.”

  “Holy moley!” Charlie’s dad whistled through his teeth once they’d gotten inside the hotel. “Your friend’s staying here? This place is fancy.”

  Thick columns beneath a decorated awning marked the entrance of the check-in office. An assortment of expensive vehicles—Mercedes-Benzes, BMWs, and Porsches—filled most of the parking stalls. One of the police officers led the Dewdles up the steps and into the illustrious hall.