Goblins on the Prowl

by Bruce Coville

  “How will we know if it’s working?” said Spirit-­William, who was floating beside me.

  “You’ll just have to try to get back in, I guess.”

  His face a mix of hope and terror, he attempted to reenter his body. As soon as he hit the flesh, his spirit form was flung back just as it had been the first time he tried. Kneeling beside me, he buried his face in his hands and began to weep.

  My heart ached for him.

  Sophronia leaned close and whispered, “Do you remember how William healed the goblin king?”

  “Of course. He had a golden collar that Granny Pinchbottom had given him. He used it to join the king’s head to his body so that . . .”

  Sudden hope flooded my chest. I also had a collar that came from Granny Pinchbottom! But what good could it possibly do William while it was locked around my neck?

  I could think of only one thing to try.

  It was time to tell the truth.

  I took the Black Stone to Bwoonhiwda and said, “Hold this, please.”

  Then I returned to William and knelt beside his body. His spirit hovered over me, inner self staring down with sad, desperate eyes at outer self.

  Putting my hands to the back of my neck, I looked up at Spirit-William and said, “This collar was meant for you. I did not mean to take it, but when I tried it on, it locked itself around my neck. It was wonderful, and terrible. It let me talk to animals but would choke me if I tried to tell a lie. You saw that happen the night of your party. So you know I am telling you the truth when I say this collar was meant for you and I am sorry that I took it. I should have told you right away.”

  The collar tingled around my neck, then opened and fell into my hands.

  “Fauna!” said Spirit-William.

  “Shhhhh . . .”

  Turning to Igor, I said, “Lift his head, please.”

  Igor knelt beside William. With surprising gentleness he used his large, hairy hands to raise William’s head from the ground.

  Tenderly I placed the collar over my friend’s throat, then pulled the ends around to the back of his neck.

  As I brought them together, I heard a click.

  They had locked into place.

  William’s spirit vanished.

  An instant later a smile curved his lips. His real lips.

  Opening his eyes, he spit out the blue goo and whispered, “You did it, Fauna!”

  Goblins believe there is a place for everything, and everything should be in its place. This applies to people, too. Adventures are all fine and good, as long as you end up where you belong.

  —Stanklo the Scribbler

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  THE LADY OF THE CASTLE

  Igor swept William into his arms and leaped to his feet. Pounding William on his back, he shouted joyfully, “William real again! William real!”

  Herky scrambled down the Big Face. “Butterhead boy back in body!” he cried, running in circles and waving his arms.

  Sterngrim fluttered to my shoulder. She made a hissing sound, and I realized she was trying to talk to me. Only, I couldn’t understand her now that I no longer had the collar. It made me a little sad.

  “She said thank you for bringing her back,” ­William called, still being held aloft by Igor.

  More hissing.

  “She says Helagon sent her someplace strange with too much light, but when you banished him, she popped back here.” Turning to Igor, he said, “Put me down, please. I’m very happy to be real, but it’s entirely due to Fauna.”

  I ducked my head and blushed.

  William came and took my hands. “Thank you,” he said softly.

  “All right, I need a little help,” Karl said. “Where’s Helagon?”

  “Fauna sent him away,” said Sophronia. “Well, it was the combination of Solomon’s Collar and the Black Stone that did the job. But it wouldn’t have happened if Fauna hadn’t resisted him and ordered him to go back to where he came from. It’s funny—in a way that’s what he wanted all along. That wasn’t his real face, by the way. If he was from the Pit, I can guarantee he was in disguise. His real face would have been horrifying.”

  “I understand that,” Karl continued. “But I still don’t see how the Black Stone ended up in Bwoon­hiwda’s bwaid—braid!”

  “I can answer at least part of that,” said Edrick-the-Toad, “and provide a few other answers as well. However, at the risk of repeating myself, I would be grateful if you would first return me to my true form. I’ve been waiting for quite a while.”

  Sophronia smiled. “Of course, darling.” Turning to Karl, she said, “My thanks to you for bringing the mirror and the book. I’ve been waiting more than seven decades to use them!”

  She walked over to Edrick and gave him a kiss.

  “A kiss?” I cried. “Is that all it takes? Like in a fairy tale?”

  Sophronia laughed. “That was just to show Edrick I love him, no matter what shape he inhabits. Still, I do prefer his true form. William, come stand here, please.”

  As Sophronia positioned William in the exact spot that she wanted, Karl walked over to me and whispered, “Look.”

  I glanced in the direction he indicated and saw Igor and Bwoonhiwda standing side by side. As Karl and I watched, the big woman took Igor’s hand. To my surprise, he snatched his hand back. Then he fell to the ground and wrapped his arms over his head.

  “What’s wong?” Bwoonhiwda cried.

  “Igor too happy! Don’t know what to do!”

  “Stand up, you big wug!”

  Igor scrambled to his feet.

  “Aw wight. That’s bettah,” Bwoonhiwda said, slipping her hand into Igor’s once more. “Now wet’s watch Sophwonia.”

  “If you two are quite ready, I’d like to get on with this,” said Sophronia. But she was smiling as she said it. “Fauna, would you come here and hold the mirror, please?”

  When I was in place, she said, “William, can you see Edrick in the glass?”

  He nodded.

  “And I can see William,” Edrick confirmed.

  “Then both of you hold still.”

  She opened the book—it clearly went right to the page she wanted—placed her finger in the middle of a page, and began to chant. Her voice was beautiful, and something about the words made my scalp tingle. I felt magic rise around us. Suddenly William cried out. A ray of white light burst from his chest, struck the mirror, bounced off it, and hit Edrick.

  Sophronia continued to chant.

  Rather than disappear, the light clung to Edrick. It spread over his huge, toadly body like melting butter. As it did, he screamed in anguish, the cry so painful I was sure Sophronia would stop chanting. To my surprise she kept on, raising her voice to be heard above it.

  Edrick continued to scream. But he was also shrinking. Soon his face was an odd mix of toad and human. Soon after that he was human, but twisted and ugly . . . the disguise he had used when he’d been trying to find the Black Stone. After that the light grew too bright and I had to turn my eyes away.

  I heard a buzz, then a loud snap.

  Edrick stopped screaming.

  When I turned my eyes back, he was fully human. However, a jagged scar stretched down the center of his handsome face. I realized it was a smaller version of the crack in the mirror, which made me feel guilty, since I was the one who’d broken it.

  Sophronia either didn’t notice the scar or didn’t care, which I guess is more likely. Even with the scar, Edrick was very handsome. She hurried to his side, and for a minute they were busy being all husband-and-wifely.

  When the two of them were finally done kissing, Edrick said, “My deepest thanks to all of you. It has been longer than I had expected since I’ve been able to stand on my own two feet.”

  Karl looked like he was about to burst. “Now will you e
xplain how the stone ended up in Bwoonhiwda’s braid?” he asked Edrick.

  “I said I could tell you part of it, which is simply this: As soon as Fauna and William brought me to life, I spit the wretched thing out. It was like a fire in my gut.”

  As he said this, I remembered the clunk of something hitting the floor at about the time he started to move. Suddenly it all came clear to me! “I know what happened!” I cried. “When you spit out the stone, it ended up on the floor in front of the fireplace. Karl, do you remember how Bwoonhiwda’s head tipped to the side when she wove the cannonball that killed ­Werdolphus into her braid? She looked for something of equal weight to balance it. The magical stone was the right size, and she chose it thinking it was just another cannonball.”

  “Hah!” exclaimed Werdolphus. “Good thing I offered to help! Otherwise you’d still be without the stone.”

  Bwoonhiwda stamped her foot. “But what now? The Bwack Stone wemains a tewwible thweat.”

  “Only if it stays in this world,” Edrick replied. “Sophronia and I plan to take it elsewhere. It will be better for everyone that way.”

  “Elsewhere?” I asked.

  Sophronia shrugged. “There are places magic-­users can go that most folks can’t. Edrick and I will grieve to leave this green and lovely world behind. Even so, it will be better for everyone if the stone is gone. We long ago swore to do this if we ever succeeded in gaining the thing. We selected our place of retreat way back then. It’s a small world but a pleasant one.” She turned to Edrick. “Ready, darling?”

  “Not yet, love. There’s one more piece of information I need to pass along. Fauna, would you come here, please?”

  I went to stand in front of him, wondering what he had in mind.

  His next words made my knees go weak.

  “I can tell you what Helagon would not.”

  I began to tremble. Was it possible that after all this time I would find out who I was and why I didn’t age?

  “Please,” I whispered.

  “You may not like what you hear. It was your own curiosity that got you into this.”

  “I still need to know . . . and to know if there is any way to change it.”

  “It’s changed already.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’ll explain in a moment. Start with this: You were with me the moment I became the toad. You shouldn’t have been, but you sneaked into the tower where I was posing as the evil wizard. You came onto the roof at the very moment I threw the magic that Harry’s mirror was designed to blast back at me. I was horrified to see you, but my shout for you to leave was cut off by my transformation.”

  As Edrick spoke, it was as if he was unlocking the doors of my memory. The moment came flooding back to me.

  I remembered the light striking Edrick.

  I remembered his cries of pain as his body twisted and turned into that of a giant toad.

  And I remembered one more thing: who I really was.

  I almost wished I hadn’t. It was too strange. And what would the others think when they heard?

  Edrick continued talking. “My theory—and it is only a theory—is that because you were right there when the Black Stone worked such powerful magic, that you were caught in the wave of that power. Then, when the stone was sealed inside my stony body, the magic that had caught you in its force was sealed as well, and it froze you as you were at that moment. When you and William released me and I spit out the stone, it released you as well. I suspect from that moment you began aging as normal.”

  Sophronia was looking at me in shock. “Edrick, you don’t mean she’s . . . ?”

  “Yes, love. It’s her.”

  Sophronia stared at me, then cried, “You’re right! I couldn’t see her at all when we were in Nilbog, and in this dim light—not to mention all the dirt on her face—I didn’t see it! Gertrude! Thank the stars and powers we’ve found you!”

  “Gertrude?” William said. “Who’s Gertrude? Wait. Where did I just hear that name?”

  “I believe that is for Fauna to tell you,” Edrick said. “I can see by her face that she has remembered.”

  Everyone turned and stared at me. In the low light that came from the mushroom forest and the cliffside fungus, I could see the curiosity on their faces.

  I took a deep breath. “Yes, I’m Gertrude. I’m the Baron’s big sister.”

  Everyone burst out talking.

  “Quiet!” roared Bwoonhiwda. “Wet Fauna speak!”

  “I’m the Baron’s big sister,” I repeated.

  “But how can that be?” William asked.

  I turned to Edrick and Sophronia. “Can you help? It’s still jumbled in my head.”

  “Of course, dear,” Sophronia said. “At the time we were working out our plan to obtain the Black Stone, we felt it would be best to have a safe place to, um . . . store Edrick once he became a stone toad. Since we were good friends with the Baron’s father, we asked if he would be willing to keep Edrick safe. The current Baron was little more than a baby at the time.”

  “We called him Bertie,” I put in. “He was only about a year old.”

  Sophronia nodded. “He was a cute little fellow. Anyway, when we told the Baron’s father our plan, he wanted to observe the magic in action. You wanted to come along too.”

  “Can you blame me?” I said. “It sounded fascinating.”

  “So what did you do?” William asked.

  I winced at the memory. “When Father told me no, I hid in his wagon and secretly rode to Harry’s village anyway. Father planned to position himself on a hill overlooking the town so he could watch what happened, but during the ride I decided to get even closer. So I slipped out of the wagon and made my way through the woods to the tower.”

  “Girl brave,” Herky said.

  “More foolish than brave. Truly, I didn’t think it was that scary. Sure, everyone in the village believed there was a wicked wizard in the tower. But I knew it was just Uncle Edrick in disguise. And I knew he would never hurt me.”

  I was surprised when I heard myself call him “Uncle” Edrick. Until that moment I had forgotten that that was how I used to think of him.

  “You were right, dear. I wouldn’t have hurt you for anything. But that didn’t mean I could protect you, with all that magic flying around!”

  “I understand that now. It wasn’t your fault.”

  “So what happened next?” William demanded.

  “When the magic bounced back from the mirror and hit Edrick, I was caught in the backwash. It was as if my mind had been wiped clear. I didn’t know who I was or why I was there. Terrified, I ran out of the tower and into the woods.”

  “And you’ve lived on your own ever since?” asked Sophronia in horror.

  “Not entirely. A few times people took me in. But when they realized I was not getting any older, they would think I was some sort of witch child. I barely escaped with my life from the second home I stayed in. After that I did live on my own. It was safer.”

  “Well, you don’t have to live on your own anymore,” William said. “I’m sure the Baron will take you in.”

  Edrick and Sophronia laughed.

  “What’s so funny?” I demanded.

  “It’s Fauna who will have to take in the Baron,” Edrick said to William. “As the elder child, she’s the true owner of Toad-in-a-Cage Castle!”

  “Baron not going to like that!” said Igor.

  I didn’t like it either. The idea made my knees weak. Then another thought hit me, a frightening one. “What if we can’t bring the Baron out of that magical sleep?”

  “I am certain he woke the moment you sent Helagon away,” Edrick said. “Just as all the other spells ended at that time.”

  “He has always known it was a possibility his sister would show up,” Sophronia added. “Though he assume
d if she ever did, it would be as a woman almost ten years older than him, not as a child!”

  “But what am I going to do with a castle?” I wailed.

  “We’ll help you,” Karl said gently. Then he added, “I’ve seen your father’s will. In fact, the Baron and I have discussed it many times. There won’t be any question about it when we go back.”

  Bwoonhiwda pounded the butt of her spear against the ground. “You ah now the Wady of the Cassew!”

  It took me a moment to realize she had called me “the Lady of the Castle.”

  I figured it might take another seventy-some years to get used to the idea.

  “And now,” said Sophronia, “it’s time for us to leave.”

  She held out her arms. I ran to her and hugged her, the way I used to so long ago. Uncle Edrick bent and kissed me on the head. “Be good,” he said, giving my hair a gentle tug.

  Back when I was Gertrude, it had always made me laugh when he did that. Now it made me sad. “Do you really have to go?”

  Sophronia had tears in her eyes. “I wish we didn’t, dear. But this is the vow we made when we joined the League of Teldrum.”

  “Will you ever come back?”

  Edrick shook his head. “That would raise the risk of another evil wizard finding the stone and coming after it. No, once there, we’ll need to stay.”

  William took my arm. “Come on,” he said softly, leading me back to the others.

  Standing face-to-face, arms around each other, Sophronia and Edrick began to chant. As their voices blended, a swirl of white light rose around them.

  A strange aroma, wild and spicy, filled the air.

  An instant later they were gone.

  After a long silence William said, “Well, Gertrude. That was interesting.”

  I smacked him on the arm. “The name is Fauna, and don’t you forget it!” With a smile I added, “You big wug!”

  So that’s the story of how I became the Lady of Toad-in-a-Cage Castle.

  When we arrived back at the castle a few days later—having been sure to return Flegmire’s bucket—we were relieved to find that the Baron had made a complete recovery. I was afraid that when he learned I was his sister, he would faint again, but he actually seemed happy about it.