The Pregnant Surgeon

by Jennifer Taylor

  Fortunately, Mario arrived with their order just then so Dylan was spared any more torture. Silence fell as he and Joanna tucked into the food. He grinned when he saw her break off a corner of toast and dip it into her egg yolk.

  ‘I’m glad you did that. It means I don’t have to mind my manners.’ Breaking off a hunk of toast, he dunked it into the runny yolk then popped it in his mouth. ‘Delicious,’ he mumbled appreciatively.

  ‘I only did it because I could tell you were dying to dunk,’ she declared, daintily wiping a crumb off her mouth with a napkin.

  ‘Oh, yeah!’ he scoffed. ‘A likely story! You’re a dyed-in-the-wool dunker. There’s no point trying to deny it because I can tell!’

  ‘Rubbish! All right, so I admit that I have been known to dunk the odd biscuit into my coffee but I have never, ever dunked into an egg yolk before.’

  ‘Oh, puhlease!’ He laid down his knife and fork and stared at her. ‘Do you really expect me to believe that you haven’t dipped a soldier into a boiled egg? I mean, that’s like asking me to believe the world is square!’

  ‘All right, then.’ A wash of colour flowed up her face at being caught out. ‘Maybe I have dipped into a boiled egg but I’ve never done the same to a fried egg, Mr Pedantic!’

  ‘I just like to get the facts straight,’ he declared, picking up his cutlery. ‘It saves a lot of problems, I always find.’

  ‘It does.’

  There was a solemn note in her voice all of a sudden and Dylan felt his stomach muscles tighten when he looked up. It was obvious that she wanted to say something and he desperately didn’t want to hear it until he’d got in first.

  ‘Joanna, I need to tell you something—something important,’ he began.

  ‘Please, don’t.’ She smiled but there were tears in her eyes. ‘I don’t want to hear it, Dylan. I know that you and I have a…a certain rapport but it’s not enough.’

  ‘Not enough? What do you mean by that?’ he demanded, his anger rising on the back of a sudden tide of fear.

  ‘That it isn’t enough to make me throw away everything I’ve worked so hard to achieve,’ she said bluntly. ‘If I got involved with you it would be professional suicide. I would become the butt of a lot of unsavoury gossip and I’m just not prepared to let that happen.’

  ‘But that’s crazy! Why should people gossip about us? And even if they did why should it have a detrimental effect?’ He reached over the table and gripped her hand, willing her to listen to him.

  ‘Because I’m a woman making her way in a man’s world. The rules that apply to men don’t apply to me. I’ve had to work twice as hard and twice as long to get this far, and it could all end tomorrow if I lost my credibility.’ She gently withdrew her hand and he could tell that she was withdrawing from him emotionally as well. ‘I am forty-two years old, Dylan, and you’re what—thirty-three, thirty-four?’

  ‘Thirty-five.’

  He wanted to add something, anything that would convince her their ages weren’t an issue, only he knew there was a grain of truth in what she’d said. Nobody thought twice about a man having a relationship with a younger female colleague—it was an accepted fact of life. However, the age gap between him and Joanna could arouse a lot of speculation, especially when he worked for her. He’d seen it happen before, seen the heartache it had caused for the couple concerned. They had split up because they hadn’t been able to deal with the narrow-minded attitude of their colleagues, but surely he and Joanna could rise above it? If only she would give him a chance to prove to her that what they had outweighed everything else…

  But did it? Could it really compensate for the fact that her career might be damaged? He might feel strongly about Joanna but there was no proof that she felt anything for him.

  Defeat was something that Dylan had never experienced before and it left a bitter taste in his mouth now. When Joanna pushed back her chair, he didn’t attempt to stop her because he could tell that it would be a waste of time. Maybe if they’d had the chance to get to know one another he would have been able to persuade her to let him try and find a solution to the problem, but this whole situation had sprung up out of nowhere. How could he expect her to trust him to look after her interests when she’d known him barely a day?

  ‘It’s time I went home to change. Thank you for breakfast, I enjoyed it.’ She slipped on her coat and he saw her fingers fumble as she fastened the buttons and knew she wasn’t as composed as she was trying to pretend.

  He stood up and walked around the table, taking her trembling hands in his as he pulled her into his arms and held her—just held her—before he let her go. And there was a lump in his throat and an ache in his heart he couldn’t even attempt to hide when he said softly, ‘Take care going home, won’t you?’

  ‘I shall.’ There was a second when he thought she was going to say something else before she reached up and kissed him on the cheek. ‘I’ll see you later, Dr Archer.’

  Dylan didn’t try to detain her as she left the café. There was no point. He sat down again but the food tasted like sawdust now. He asked Mario for the bill and left the café a few minutes later, checking his watch as he made his way to the tube. It was just gone seven, twenty-three hours since he’d started his new job. It wasn’t very long, certainly not long enough by most people’s standards to have fallen in love and had his heart broken. Now he had to accept that Joanna was never going to be his and get on with his life.

  He grimaced because it wasn’t going to be easy when he would have to see her every day at work. He would just have to do his best—for both their sakes.

  CHAPTER SIX

  ‘I WISH I could promise you that your husband will make a full recovery, Mrs Price, but the injuries he received were very serious indeed.’

  Joanna had been on her way to her office after the morning ward round had finished when the IC unit had paged to tell her that Noel Price’s wife was asking to speak to her. The IC consultant was on holiday that week so Joanna had agreed to have a word with the woman in his absence.

  Kathleen Price had been staying overnight with her mother when the explosion had ripped through the block of flats and had only discovered that her husband had been injured when she’d returned home that morning. She was dreadfully upset and Joanna sighed as she took her into the relatives’ room because it was obvious that she was going to have to spend far more time than she could spare, talking to her.

  ‘I just can’t believe what’s happened!’ Kathleen Price exclaimed, sinking down onto a chair. ‘I mean, everything was fine when I left home last night. Mum’s had a dreadful cold, you see, and Noel knew I was worried about her so he told me to stay the night with her. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the state of the place this morning. It looked like a bomb site!’

  ‘It must have been a terrible shock,’ Joanna sympathised, shooting a surreptitious glance at her watch. Last night’s emergency had put a lot of pressure on everyone and they were still suffering the after-effects. The ward round had taken twice as long as it normally did because there’d been so many extra patients to see, plus there were several people who would need to be taken back to Theatre later that day. They would have to be fitted in around the operations that were already scheduled but it looked as though it was going to be another hectic session.

  ‘Oh, it was!’ Kathleen agreed. ‘But the worst thing of all was seeing Noel lying in that bed. He looks so ill!’

  She began to sob as Joanna sat down beside her. ‘I know how frightening it must have been to see your husband attached to all that machinery, Mrs Price, but this really is the best place for him.’

  ‘I know that, Doctor. Really, I do. It was just such a shock, you understand.’ Kathleen wiped her eyes. ‘I’m sorry. I’m not helping matters by falling apart like this. Tell me, honestly, what are Noel’s chances of pulling through?’

  Joanna hesitated but she knew it would be wrong to raise Mrs Price’s hopes. It was best to tell people the truth rather than mislead
them into thinking everything was going to be fine.

  Her heart spasmed with pain because that thought reminded her about what had happened earlier that morning between her and Dylan. She could have suggested that they should be circumspect and make sure that no one found out they were seeing each other, but she knew it would have been the wrong thing to do. There was just no way that she could risk getting involved with Dylan. It wouldn’t be fair to him or to herself. She was his boss and he was a member of her team—that had to be the sum total of their relationship from now on even though it wouldn’t be easy to stick that. There was something about Dylan that drew her as no other man had ever done.

  Joanna put that worrying thought out of her mind as she gently explained to Kathleen Price how gravely ill her husband was. ‘Your husband’s injuries were very severe, Mrs Price. I had to remove sections of his stomach and pancreas when I operated on him.’

  ‘But will he pull through?’ Kathleen persisted. ‘He can live with bits of his insides missing?’

  ‘Yes, he can.’ Joanna held up her hand when Kathleen gasped in relief. ‘However, even if he does pull through, and it is if at this stage, there could be problems in the future. I had to remove the head of the pancreas so there is a strong possibility that he might develop diabetes because the pancreas won’t be able to produce enough insulin. Obviously, there is a high risk of infection with this type of injury, too, although he is currently receiving antibiotics to counteract that.’ She shrugged. ‘Add shock and extensive blood loss and you can see that he is a very sick man.’

  ‘I understand that, Doctor, but he has a chance and that’s all that matters.’ Kathleen took a deep breath and stood up. ‘You’ve done all you can for him and I’m truly grateful to you. Now it’s my turn. I’m going back in there and I’m going to make him fight to get better!’

  ‘Good for you.’ Joanna smiled when she heard the determination in the woman’s voice. ‘I’m a firm believer in the power of positive thought so, who knows, you might just give your husband that extra little incentive he needs.’

  ‘That’s what I intend to do.’

  Kathleen hurried on ahead as they left the room and went straight into the IC unit. Joanna paused to have a brief word with the sister then went to her office. She checked her messages then headed to Theatre when she discovered there was nothing needing her urgent attention. Sarah Rothwell, one of her junior registrars, was talking to Dylan outside Theatre one. Joanna nodded to them as she passed, trying to ignore the pang of jealousy that had struck her when she’d seen Dylan chatting to the younger woman. Dylan was free to talk to whomsoever he chose and it had nothing to do with her.

  That thought was all well and good but it was hard to remain upbeat when she left Theatre a couple of hours later and found Dylan and Sarah deep in conversation once more. She shot them a withering look as she strode towards the changing room.

  ‘If you two are short of work I’m sure I can find something to occupy you,’ she said coldly.

  ‘Dylan was just explaining what to look out for when I do this appendicectomy that’s been rushed in,’ Sarah said hurriedly.

  ‘If you have problems about performing a simple appendicectomy, Dr Rothwell, I suggest you discuss them with me. We may need to review your position as a member of this team.’

  The door slammed shut behind her as Joanna let herself into the changing room. She knew she’d been rather hard on the younger woman but there was no room on the team for people who suffered from a lack of confidence. If Sarah had to double-check before such a simple procedure maybe she was in the wrong job.

  She had tossed her disposable cap into the trash bag and was just about to kick off her Theatre shoes when the door opened and Dylan appeared.

  ‘There was no need to take it out on Sarah.’

  ‘I’ve no idea what you’re talking about. Now, if you don’t mind, Dr Archer, I am trying to get changed.’

  He ignored her as he closed the door and leant against it with his arms folded. There was a glint in his eyes that warned her he was angry about what had happened, but she was angry, too. A couple of hours ago he’d been turning on the charm for her benefit and it hurt to realise just how quickly he’d set his sights on someone else after she’d rebuffed him. Obviously, Dylan wasn’t suffering from a broken heart!

  ‘If it’s me you’re angry with then why not say so, Joanna? It isn’t fair to bite Sarah’s head off because I’ve rubbed you up the wrong way.’

  ‘I didn’t bite Sarah’s head off nor did you rub me up the wrong way! How I deal with my staff is my business and I don’t think you are in any position to comment.’

  ‘Oh, come on. We both know what this is all about!’ He laughed harshly. ‘You’re annoyed with me because I dared to overstep the mark this morning. You’re also angry at yourself because you let your guard slip, and that’s even more unforgivable, isn’t it? I’m willing to accept my share of the blame so why can’t you accept yours?’

  ‘You have it all worked out, don’t you, Dr Archer? How wonderful it must be to have such a rare insight into what makes a person tick.’ Her laughter was filled with scorn and she saw his mouth thin.

  ‘I don’t have anything worked out. I’m simply adding two and two and hoping to find an answer that makes some sense. I can’t see any other reason why you would choose to destroy Sarah’s confidence like that. I don’t think you’re a naturally cruel person but, then, I don’t know you that well, do I?’

  ‘No, you don’t.’

  Joanna turned away when she felt the hot sting of tears fill her eyes. Had she dented Sarah’s confidence by her comments? She hated to think it was true but there was no way that she could simply dismiss the claim. Didn’t she know how hard it was for a woman to make her way in surgery, how difficult it was to fight against the sexist culture that still thrived in so many hospitals? The thought that she might be guilty of inflicting that kind of harm on the younger woman was hard to accept but she had to face what she had done and try to make amends.

  ‘I shall apologise to Dr Rothwell as soon as I get the chance,’ she said, her voice muffled with tears of shame. ‘I didn’t mean to upset her.’

  ‘And I didn’t mean to upset you, either.’

  Suddenly Dylan was behind her, his hands warm and strong on her shoulders as he turned her to face him. He sighed when he saw the tears trembling on her lashes. ‘I’m sorry, Joanna. I overreacted just now. Will you forgive me?’

  ‘There’s nothing to forgive,’ she said huskily. ‘It was my fault for snapping like that. It was just when I saw you and Sarah…’

  She stopped and swallowed but he had already guessed what she’d been about to say. A wave of sadness crossed his face as he drew her to him and hugged her tightly for a moment before he let her go.

  ‘I’m sorry. It almost makes me wish that I’d never started this,’ he said simply.

  Joanna didn’t say anything as he left the changing room. Pointing out that he’d said he was almost sorry wouldn’t have helped the situation one bit. However, the thought that Dylan didn’t regret what had happened stayed with her for the rest of the day, a small bright spot that shone out through the gloom. Maybe they couldn’t be anything more than colleagues but the fact that he didn’t regret how he felt took away some of the ache. In a funny kind of a way she knew how he felt because she wasn’t sorry about what had happened either. How strange.

  Dylan was surprised by how easily he and Joanna managed to overcome their initial difficulties during the ensuing weeks. He knew she was making as much of an effort as he was to keep everything on an even keel but he’d still expected there to be hiccups. Maybe it was the fact that they were meticulous about keeping any conversations they had on a purely work-related footing that helped.

  Several times he found himself mentally taking a step back while he was talking to Joanna and observing what was happening. He could scarcely believe that he could remain so focused on work when he felt so strongly about her. But,
then, he didn’t have a choice. It was either play the game according to her rules or find himself another job, and he simply wasn’t prepared to cut himself off from her completely. Maybe it was foolish but he couldn’t stop hoping that one day she would see that they could have a future together that wasn’t solely work-orientated.

  February came and went, then March arrived and he was busier than ever. St Leonard’s reputation was spreading and they were getting a lot of referrals from GPs within their catchment area. Joanna’s weekly clinics—when she assessed new patients who might require surgery—were filled to overflowing and he wasn’t surprised when she arranged for him to hold a second clinic to share the workload. Wednesday afternoon was the time set aside for referrals and he’d just settled down to check through his list when she popped her head round the consulting room door.

  ‘Brian Maxwell has just been on the phone to ask me if I’d go to his office,’ she explained, referring to the hospital’s director. ‘It means I might be a bit late starting today so could you take a couple of my patients if you’re not too busy?’

  ‘Of course, although I’ve got a pretty full list myself today, too.’ He tapped the printed sheet that was lying on his desk. ‘There’s four people been referred to us by that new GP at the health centre along the road for starters.’

  ‘He seems to be drumming up a lot of business for us lately.’

  She came over to the desk so she could read the list of names and the reasons why the patients had been referred to them. Dylan felt his heart jolt when she bent and he caught the faint aroma of her soap—something delicate and feminine that made his insides quiver with delight. It was difficult to hide how it made him feel when she glanced up, and the sudden rush of colour that invaded her cheeks pointed to the fact that he hadn’t been completely successful in his efforts.