Outback Ghost

by Rachael Johns

  They all nodded, happy with this plan.

  Adam didn’t care who took him, he simply needed out before his head and heart exploded. And thinking logically, his dad would be a better bet than travelling back with any of the females who’d no doubt want to talk and pummel him with endless questions about what had happened. For once he was glad his dad was a man of few words.

  ‘Mummy?’

  Stella’s heart crashed into her chest at the sound of Heidi waking. Oxygen flooded her lungs. She felt as if she’d been holding her breath since she’d returned Adam’s call a few hours ago.

  ‘Oh baby.’ Her eyes filling with happy tears, Stella leaned forward and cradled Heidi in a hug. ‘I love you so much.’

  ‘Where Adam?’

  Stella pulled back slightly and looked into Heidi’s eyes. She wasn’t wearing her glasses and the lack of this barrier made the emotion in her face all the more obvious. ‘He’s just outside,’ she said, leaning forward to kiss Heidi’s check. ‘How are you feeling, scrumptious?’

  ‘Whiskers had kittens.’ Heidi beamed at her announcement.

  ‘I know.’ Stella just managed the words, her throat choking up at Heidi’s lack of concern for her predicament.

  ‘I want kittens.’

  ‘Maybe we can get one when we go back to Perth.’ The way she felt right now she’d happily promise Heidi the world.

  She met Stella’s suggestion with a frown. ‘Don’t want to go.’

  ‘Honey, you were bitten by a snake today,’ Stella said, stroking back Heidi’s hair. ‘It’s not safe up here.’

  For the first time in her life, Heidi pulled away from Stella. ‘Want Adam,’ she said with a pout.

  Stella tried to swallow the emotion rising within her at Heidi’s preference for a stranger. ‘Okay, darling,’ she said, standing, ‘I’ll go get him.’

  But when she walked out into the waiting room she saw everyone but Adam. ‘Esther?’ she said, the older woman’s surprising presence distracting her from her mission. ‘What are you doing here?’

  In reply Esther closed the distance between them and pulled Stella into her arms. ‘I’m so sorry,’ she said, her words almost lost in Stella’s hair. ‘Thank God Adam was there or I don’t know what we’d have done.’

  ‘Yes,’ came a deep voice from behind them. Stella turned to see the doctor who’d been monitoring Heidi’s condition while she’d been sleeping. ‘Mr Burton’s quick and accurate first aid for snakebites saved her life, no doubt about it. She’s one very lucky girl.’

  A horrible taste filled Stella’s mouth and guilt slammed into her as she thought about how awful she’d been to Adam. She’d let her love for him get in the way of the situation and blind the facts. As a country girl from way back, she knew no one could ever be blamed for snakebites. Instead of giving him the death stare she should have been kissing his feet in thanks. ‘Where is Adam?’ she asked, scanning the faces surrounding her.

  ‘He’s gone,’ Ruby supplied and Stella’s heart dropped to her stomach so she barely noticed the rest of Ruby’s sentence. ‘Dave’s driven him back to the farm to get your car and some clothes for you.’

  ‘Oh,’ was all she could manage. Even after she’d all but accused him of trying to kill her daughter, he’d been thinking of what he could do to help them. One step ahead of her – she hadn’t even thought about needing a car or supplies to get her through till Heidi was released from hospital.

  ‘Heidi wanted to see him,’ she added after a long pause. The truth was she wanted to see him too. She needed to thank him for looking after her daughter, for saving her life.

  As predicted, the drive back to Annadale didn’t involve a lot of conversation between Adam and his dad and for that he was thankful. It was the first time he’d been completely alone with his father since Dave had come back and he should use the time to ask him what he planned to do now, but thinking about his parents’ future was too hard when his seemed such a damn mess.

  Dave took him straight to the homestead where he’d left Stella’s car earlier that day. Mutton, unaware of all the drama that had happened as they’d left him tied up next to Goldie on the veranda when then they went to see Whiskers, started barking his head off at the sight of Adam. Finding the smallest solace in his pup’s warm welcome, Adam ruffled the dog’s fur, then let him off the chain for a quick run while he went inside to get the animals some dinner.

  ‘I’ll do that,’ Dave said, reading Adam’s mind. ‘You probably want to be getting back to your girls.’

  The way he said ‘your girls’ caused Adam to do a double take. His dad saw his confusion and chuckled. ‘I may be an unemotional Aussie farmer but I’d have to be dead not to notice the way you looked at Heidi, and as for her mum, well… the last time I remember seeing that look was in my wedding photos. And Lord knows, despite all that’s happened, I loved your mother with everything I’ve got that day and I feel exactly the same right now.’

  ‘Really?’ Adam looked off into the paddock, not used to such sentimental conversations with his father. Still he was curious. ‘You think you guys can recover from everything?’

  ‘I’ve asked her to try,’ Dave said. ‘And she’s said yes. When I first left I felt freer than I’d ever felt in my life, but not long on the ship and I realised I didn’t want to be free. I wanted to do these things but I wanted to do them with your mother. I hope one day she’ll be able to find it within herself to come on a holiday with me, but the bottom line is, I’d rather spend my life here with her than be anywhere in the world without her.’

  ‘I’d better be getting back to the hospital,’ Adam said, uncomfortable with the touchy-feely nature of this conversation and, if he were honest with himself, a little damn jealous of his parents.

  ‘Yes, you go be with your girls.’

  Adam spun around to face his father. ‘They’re not my girls, Dad. They’re just guests that stayed at the cottage.’

  Dave slowly raised his eyebrows. ‘Do you really believe that, son?’

  ‘It doesn’t matter what I believe. Stella will never forgive me for letting Heidi get hurt. Hell, I’ll never forgive myself.’

  ‘Does she know you love her?’

  Fuck! This was not territory he ever travelled with his father. ‘Who said I love her?’ he spat with a shrug.

  Dave chuckled and shook his head. ‘You go on fooling yourself if you want to but don’t blame me if you lose her. I’ve not known her long but she’s a damn good woman and you’d be a damn fool to let her slip away just because you can’t lay your heart on the damn table.’ With that Dave turned on his heels and headed inside.

  Adam glanced down at the dogs and swore both Mutton and Goldie were giving him the evil eye. Retrieving the keys for Stella’s car from the hallway table, he didn’t spare either animal another glance as he headed down the steps towards the car.

  His head churned with thoughts as he turned the key in the ignition. Whatever waited for him at the hospital, there was one thing he had to do before he faced it. He drove the fifty or so metres to the shearing shed, parked the car out front and kept a beady eye on the ground as he headed inside, using an app on his phone for torchlight.

  He barely breathed as he climbed up into the shed and scanned the torch around his feet. The way he was feeling right now no snake should dare mess with him but he knew not to let down his guard. He moved quietly as he headed for the corner, hoping against hope that cat had conquered snake, but his heart crashed at the sight he came upon.

  ‘No!’ The snake lay twisted and lifeless on the ground and Whiskers, equally as cold, lay not half a metre away. Lying on the castaway newspaper Whiskers had used for a delivery bed were the tiny kittens, soft mewls coming from their hungry mouths. He had to save them. Glancing around for anything to use as a basket, he spotted an old crate on its side and retrieved it. Carefully he lifted the newspaper and the kittens and placed them in the bottom of the crate. They’d been on their own a good few hours and he knew if he had
any hope in hell of saving them, they needed milk fast.

  Adam placed the crate on the passenger seat of Stella’s car and drove fast but safely back to the house. ‘Thank God,’ he said as he saw Dave shutting the front door. He hadn’t left to get Esther yet.

  ‘What’s the matter?’ Dave called as Adam got out and ran round to the passenger side.

  ‘I need your help,’ he shouted.

  Dave ran, arriving at the car as Adam lifted out the crate. ‘Shit,’ was all he said as he laid eyes on the tiny bundles of fur.

  ‘The snake got Whiskers.’ Adam’s throat filled with tears as he spoke, which was ridiculous. He was a farmer for crying out loud – he saw birth and death on a regular basis – but he couldn’t let these kittens die. He felt as if he owed it to Whiskers but even more so to Heidi. And Stella.

  Dave was reaching out to take the crate. ‘You get to the hospital, I’ll look after these little guys.’

  ‘You promise?’ Adam pleaded. ‘They need to be okay.’

  ‘I understand, son.’ Dave met his eyes and Adam knew they were on the same page. ‘I’ve raised enough orphan lambs in my time. Kittens can’t be that different.’

  ‘Thanks Dad.’ Adam patted his father on the shoulder as Dave got a grip of the crate. ‘Maybe get Sally out to check them over,’ he said, already on his way back round to the driver’s side.

  ‘Will do.’ Dave promised.

  And as Adam got back into Stella’s car and drove the half an hour to Geraldton, he replayed his dad’s advice over and over in his head. As he pulled into the hospital car park, he came to the conclusion that life was a lottery. Most things you had f–all control over, but that didn’t mean you had to roll over and let life play all the cards.

  This time he was dealing them.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Stella sipped the cup of water a nurse had brought her and watched as Esther read Heidi an old Golden Circle book they’d found in the hospital waiting room. Some pages were torn and the spine tattered but neither of them cared. Heidi had been upset upon learning that Adam had gone and so Stella had asked Esther if she’d come in and say ‘hi’. It warmed her heart that Frankie, Simone, Ruby and Ruth were still out there waiting but the nurses wouldn’t let any other visitors into the room.

  As she watched Heidi and the woman who had been like a surrogate grandmother this last month interact with each other, she tried not to think about the fact she’d be breaking that bond when she took Heidi home. The fact that Esther had conquered her fears of leaving the farm to be with Heidi proved the love she had for the little girl and Stella had never felt so conflicted in her life. Having calmed down from the initial shock of the snakebite, she now found thoughts of staying in Bunyip Bay creeping back.

  No matter how much the logical side of her brain told her that moving up here wouldn’t be the same as the time they’d spent here the last month, she couldn’t get the idea out of her head. She wanted the dream. She wanted a family again. Knowing these thoughts weren’t healthy Stella glanced at her watch wondering when Adam would return. It felt as if he’d been gone for hours but she felt on edge waiting for him to come back.

  Although she knew they couldn’t leave the hospital until Heidi had been giving the all clear, and that might not be till tomorrow or even the day after, she wanted to go back to the farm so she could pack their things. The quicker they left now, the better. She didn’t trust herself to stay any longer in Adam’s presence and knew her heart couldn’t handle any more time in his bed but it wasn’t only her heart that would break when they left. Still, although she couldn’t bear the thought of Heidi having to go through proper goodbyes to Adam and Esther, prolonging that agony wouldn’t make it any easier.

  Heidi would need time to recover from the heartbreak of leaving her new friends, but sometimes life was tough. Stella had learnt that fact on more than one occasion and as much as she yearned to protect Heidi, her daughter needed to learn that lesson as well.

  ‘You’re awake.’

  Adam’s words and arrival jolted Stella’s thoughts. He nervously glanced her way but then headed straight to Heidi. ‘Hey missy,’ he said, ‘do you like giving me frights or something?’

  She beamed up at him and giggled. ‘Want to see kittens. Want Whiskers.’

  He chuckled and reached out to stroke her cheek. ‘And I’m sure they want to see you too, as soon as the nice doctor says you’re allowed to come home.’

  ‘Hopefully tomorrow,’ Stella said, wanting him to look her way.

  He did and an awareness sparked between them. But there was something more than the usual heat. ‘We need to talk,’ he said, looking directly at her.

  She nodded and swallowed.

  ‘Mum,’ Adam said, glancing at Esther, ‘do you mind sitting with Heidi a couple more minutes?’

  Esther smiled and shook her head. ‘Of course not.’

  ‘Back soon, kiddo.’ Adam smiled at Heidi and then held the partitioning curtain open for Stella to go through. She stepped past him and felt his hand on the small of her back as he ushered her out of the emergency ward. Her skin tingled under his touch and her heart broke a little more.

  He led her to a quiet spot down the end of the corridor and then stopped, turning to face her. He opened his mouth but she couldn’t bear to hear his attempted apology again.

  ‘Don’t say it,’ she said, reaching up to cover his lips with her finger. ‘I’m the one that should be apologising. I was in shock when I saw Heidi lying in that bed but I know the snakebite wasn’t your fault. She can be persistent when she wants something and goodness knows I’d have been looking at the kittens rather than around me as well. The doctor told me you saved her life and I’ll be forever grateful.’

  ‘I didn’t bring you out here to apologise,’ Adam said.

  ‘You didn’t?’

  He shook his head. ‘And I don’t want you to be grateful.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘You weren’t the only one that got a shock today,’ he continued. ‘I would have died if something happened to Heidi because I’d never be able to look into the eyes of the woman I love.’

  Something twitched in Stella’s chest. Confusion flooded her. ‘Who’s that?’

  His lips turned upwards into the most delicious grin. ‘You, silly.’ And then he stepped towards her, cupped her face in his hands and pressed his lips against her mouth. It was the most intoxicating kiss of her life and she felt her sanity slipping.

  Grabbing hold of it before it was too late, she forced herself to break the kiss and look into his eyes. ‘What are you saying, Adam?’

  ‘I’m saying I love you. It happened so damn fast I almost missed it but,’ he clutched his chest, ‘what you make me feel is like nothing I’ve ever felt before and I don’t ever want to let you go. I’m hoping maybe you feel the same way and that you’ll agree to move up and live with me permanently.’

  Oh. His words were more alluring than an ancient love poem. How she wanted to believe them. ‘But what about Heidi?’ she managed.

  He took her hands and brought them up against his chest, looking into her eyes as he answered. ‘Stella, I can’t live without Heidi any more than I can live without you.’

  Happy tears flooded her eyes but she managed to say one more thing. ‘Are you sure you want children? It wasn’t so long ago you thought you didn’t.’

  ‘That was fear speaking,’ he admitted, leaning in and holding her close. ‘After Lily-Blue disappeared, I blamed myself. Mum and Dad never said so, but I always thought it was my fault she disappeared, that I should have been looking out for her. I thought if I’d managed to lose my sister, I didn’t deserve kids or a family of my own.’ And then he shrugged one shoulder. ‘Hey, maybe I still don’t, but that doesn’t stop me wanting it. Wanting you and Heidi.’

  ‘Oh Adam. You do deserve it. What happened to Lily-Blue wasn’t your fault and I’m sure she wouldn’t have wanted you to live your life thinking so.’

  ‘Does that me
an you’ll make me the happiest man alive and agree to be my wife?’

  ‘Adam!’ Stella blinked, the shock and joy almost knocking her over.

  ‘What?’ He shrugged his delectable shoulders. ‘I can’t help it if I know what I want.’

  ‘Yes.’ She grinned. ‘I’m probably crazy to say so, but yes.’

  ‘Crazy in love,’ he said, drawing her into him for another blissful kiss.

  When they finally came up for air, he said, ‘I understand if you want to take things slow and wait a while before we tell Heidi and my family but…’

  ‘I don’t.’ She’d never been surer of anything in her life. ‘Heidi adores you and your family. It’s been a shocking day, let’s make it better.’

  Then, together, they walked back into the emergency room, told Esther to start looking for a mother-of-the-bride outfit and asked Heidi to do the great honour of being their flower girl.

  Epilogue

  Four months after the discovery of the remains under the jacaranda tree at the back of Uncle Tom’s cottage, the pathologist confirmed the body was that of seven year old Lily-Blue Burton who’d gone missing from her family property over twenty years ago. Forensic testing determined the cause of death as being from a blow to the back of her head. Perhaps thankfully, they hadn’t been able to confirm whether the crime was sexually motivated or otherwise.

  The sun shone high in a beautiful autumn sky the day her family were finally able to lay Lily-Blue to rest. The main street of Bunyip Bay and all its shops closed unofficially for the afternoon as the whole town turned up to put a twenty-year mystery to rest. When the black hearse with a tiny white coffin in the back turned into the local cemetery, there wasn’t a dry eye anywhere.

  Faith and Monty, as well as his parents and brother, had made the trip north to support their friends, as had others who’d been living in town at the time of Lily-Blue’s disappearance but had since moved on. Stella, Heidi, Ruby and Drew were only recent newcomers to Bunyip Bay but their closeness to Adam and the situation made them as moved as anyone. No one who’d lived in the region or known the Burtons remained unaffected. Although this wasn’t the outcome anyone had been hoping for, there was almost a feeling of contentment among the crowd as little Heidi stepped forward and laid a pink and purple wreath upon the coffin.