Envy (The Damning Book 2)

by Katie May

blinking rapidly, my neck craning from side to side.

  My mates had fallen asleep around me, and I took the moment to survey

  them. Bash still slept beside me, but in sleep, he looked like an entirely

  different man. Peaceful. The stress of his position as a prince and a powerful

  Mage diminished when he slept. His face appeared as if it was carved from

  marble, and his lashes feathered against his high cheekbones like twigs of

  ebony. His breathing was steady, sawing in and out.

  Turning, being careful not to remove the arm around my waist, I stared

  down at my feet. Lupe was clutching one of my feet in his sleep desperately,

  as if he was afraid that removing his hand would be letting me go.

  Silly boy. Didn't he know that I wasn't going anywhere?

  That realization took me by surprise. I didn't know how to deal with it, so

  I did what I did best. Bury it in the sand to uncover at a later time.

  Devlin and Killian were on the opposite side of my feet. Devlin was

  clutching my foot as if it was his favorite stuffed animal, and Killian was

  curled around Devlin. Aww. Killian was a cuddler. It was too adorable.

  I wished I could take a picture or something to remember that moment.

  Jax was draped over my head, face inside my hair. I canted my head

  backwards, smiling softly when Jax muttered something indecipherable,

  inhaling deeply. I could've been mistaken, but it almost sounded like my

  name.

  Finally, I turned in my bed, meeting Dair's bright blue gaze.

  "You're awake," I whispered accusingly. He smiled, blinding me with his

  white teeth.

  "I've been awake for awhile," he replied. He scooted closer to me so we

  were nose to nose in the large bed. His golden skin was peppered with

  freckles from all the time he spent out in the sun. Irrationally, I wanted to stay

  in bed and count each and every one of them. I wondered if he had more on

  his body, and the thought sent a thrill straight between my thighs.

  "Why haven't you moved?" I asked softly. As if it had a mind of its own,

  my hand lifted and began to lightly trace his features. His skin was smooth,

  velvety, beneath my hand.

  "I like watching you sleep," he replied unashamedly.

  "Creeper." My hand caught on a shard of stone, and I tugged it out of his

  hair distastefully. "How do you feel?"

  He chuckled. "Shouldn't I be asking you that? You were the one who was

  paralyzed."

  "Yes, but you were the one who was turned into stone." I laughed,

  quickly smothering it with the back of my hand before the sound could carry.

  "Are we going to start comparing tragedies? Declaring winners?"

  He laughed as well. "I would rather not."

  "Good. Me neither." My breathing hitched as his eyes lowered to my lips.

  We were so close, so painfully close, that all it would take was one inch of

  movement and we would be kissing. I wanted to taste him, to decide whether

  or not his lips tasted as salty as his skin. "And in answer to your question, I'm

  fine."

  "Me too," he whispered.

  And then our lips met, and we were exchanging the lightest, most

  innocent kisses imaginable. Our lips moved over one another's as if they were

  meant to do exactly that. It was the sweetest kiss I had ever experienced

  before in my life.

  He pulled away with a simple peck to the corner of my mouth. His eyes

  were alive, brightening with exhilaration and awe.

  "I love you," he whispered. Another kiss was planted on my cheek. "I

  love you." His lips touched my jawline before moving lower. Tiny kisses

  were trailed down my neck, each one accompanied by a declaration of love. I

  raised my chin to grant him better access. "I love you."

  "Dair," I whispered breathlessly. "I-"

  Before I could finish my sentence, a startled yelp came from by my feet. I

  turned, amused, just in time to see Devlin jumping up as if his ass was on

  fire. He was throwing daggers with his eyes at Killian who looked sheepish.

  "Sorry," Killian murmured.

  "Your fucking cock was against my asshole!" Devlin yelled in horror. His

  hands reached for his butt as if he was protecting it from phantom cock. "I

  felt it. Why the fuck are you that hard?"

  "I'm always hard," my Incubus protested indignantly.

  "Awww, Devlin, do you not want a dick in your ass? There goes my plan

  for pegging," I teased lightly, and his violet eyes snapped to mine. Relief

  shuttered over his expression as he practically climbed over Lupe to get to

  me. He peppered my face with kisses, seemingly oblivious or choosing to

  ignore Dair still kissing my neck.

  "You damn, stupid girl. Don't you ever fucking scare me like that again."

  "Us," a soft voice corrected. I stared over Devlin's shoulder at Ryland,

  who was standing in the corner of the room. The shadows obscured his face

  from view once more. “Don’t ever scare us like that again.”

  Why the fuck was he all the way over there?

  "Us. Me. Whatever. Don't do that shit again." Devlin accentuated the final

  statement with a bruising kiss to my lips. There was no doubt that they would

  become swollen.

  "Yes, sir," I whispered, and his eyes darkened. Oh yes. Devlin liked that.

  "I thought you were fucking dead," Bash croaked from beside me. His

  hair was sleep-mussed, bags still evident beneath his eyes, but his smile was

  luminescent. He interlocked his fingers with mine, but I immediately pulled

  away. Hurt flashed in his eyes, briefly, before that was replaced by icy

  indifference. Without a word, he pushed back the blankets and stormed out of

  bed. My traitorous eyes automatically latched onto his ass looking especially

  delectable in his boxer briefs.

  Damn eyes.

  And damn heart crying for him to come back.

  "I'm sorry," Killian blurted, drawing my attention back to him. He was

  now standing at the foot of my bed, eyes trained intently on me. He was

  shaking, I realized somewhat distantly. His body shook with tremors, and

  tears filled his eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, Z. I'm a horrible, shitty

  mate. I stupidly thought...I just don't...I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."

  I moved my eyes away from Killian's, briefly, to meet Devlin's stare. He

  gave me a small nod to show me he understood.

  "Why don't we give them a moment?" he suggested, and my other mates

  reluctantly moved out of my bed. Lupe, Dair, and Devlin each gave me a

  final kiss. Jax merely sniffed my chest, no surprise, but Ryland refused to

  even acknowledge me as he glided out of the door.

  What the hell was that about?

  Ryland was momentarily forgotten when Lupe picked up Dair and held

  him like he was a baby.

  "This is humiliating," Dair murmured beneath his breath. Of course, that

  seemed to be permission for Lupe to baby talk Dair as they exited the room. I

  heard statements like "Do you need your diaper wiper changed?" and "Does

  little Dairy need a nappy wappy?"

  I snorted out a laugh, but that laughter died in my throat when I took

  stock of Killian. Shirtless. His tattoos and muscles on display, so delectable

  that I had to restrain myself from licking a pathway across his glorious skin.

  For the fir
st time that I could remember, I was locked in a room with my

  Incubus Prince.

  TWENTY

  KILLIAN

  Iwatched her crawl to her knees on the bed, her glorious blond hair

  trailing behind her like liquid gold. In her form-fitting blue dress, she

  was a sight to behold. Something ethereal that I sought to worship and

  love until the end of time.

  Anxiously, I pulled my lower lip between my teeth. Why did it make me

  so nervous to be around Z, my mate? It wasn’t just because she was beautiful,

  though that could've been one of the many reasons, but because she was able

  to see me. Not the me the rest of the world saw and revered, but the me I

  reserved solely for my brothers.

  And it scared the shit out of me.

  That transparency...it shouldn’t have been normal. I had never felt more

  vulnerable than I did in her eyes, stripped bare of all masks.

  “What’s wrong, Kill?” she asked, nibbling on her lower lip. I couldn’t

  help but smirk at the nervous gesture she displayed - a mirror image of my

  own. She realized it at the same time I did and released her lip, smiling.

  “Oops.”

  I forked my trembling fingers through my tousled red hair, my agitation

  physically manifesting itself. All I could see, repeatedly, was Z’s body falling

  to the ground. The Gorgon carelessly tossing her over its shoulder. The fight

  draining from her eyes, bleeding dry...

  I shuddered at the images, the feelings they evoked within me. I never

  wanted to feel that helpless again. Being able to see and hear everything,

  unable to step in, was torture.

  “I want you to train me,” I blurted. She paused, mouth partially opened as

  if she was going to say something. At my words, her mouth slammed shut

  and her eyes widened.

  “Train?”

  “Yes.” I nodded my head. The more I thought about it, the more sure I

  was. Never again did I want to sit on the sidelines. To be a mere witness in

  our fucked up world of predators and prey. “To fight.”

  When she continued to stare at me blankly, I hurried to explain. To some,

  my decision may have come across as impulsive, but I knew Z would

  understand. She had to. “When we were...frozen...” My voice wobbled over

  that one word. Frozen. Entrapped. I could still feel my body weighed down

  by cement. Clearing my throat, I continued doggedly. Z didn’t laugh as my

  stutter became more pronounced - something that always occurred when I felt

  a strong emotion.

  “When we were frozen,” I repeated, “we were able to see everything. We

  watched you come into the garden, but we were helpless to warn you.”

  My jaw clenched almost painfully at the memory. I had tried to scream at

  her, but the words became lost. All I could do was watch...

  “The others, at least, were faced away. They didn’t have to see you...they

  didn’t see you get attacked. They didn’t see your body...”

  I began to pace as if that could somehow quell the tension reverberating

  through me. My fingernails dug into my biceps, and I impatiently scratched

  at the skin.

  “Kill,” she said softly. Sweetly. It was a tone of voice I imagined she

  wouldn’t use with anyone else, only me. At first, I felt a rush of exhilaration

  and a strange sense of giddiness. That dissipated just as quickly.

  She had to treat me with kid gloves because she thought I was weaker.

  Still, I couldn’t resist grabbing the hand she proffered. Immediately, I fell

  face first onto the bed, and her small body wrapped around mine. I ended up

  with my head beneath her chin, and her hand lightly stroking my arm.

  God, I could die in her embrace.

  I loved her.

  I loved her so damn much that it sometimes hurt to breathe.

  It wasn’t a surprise for me, this revelation. Not really. A part of me had

  always known it, had known it from the very first time she had protected me.

  When I had compared her hair to food.

  I twirled a piece of her hair around my finger, smiling gently. Definitely

  spaghetti hair.

  “So you want to fight?” Z asked, breaking the silence we had grown

  accustomed to. I tensed immediately in her arms before willing my body to

  relax. She wasn’t like my father. She wouldn’t laugh at me or reprimand me

  or talk down to me.

  “I want to protect you,” I admitted earnestly.

  Snorting, she tapped her finger against my chin, tilting my head up. I lost

  myself in her gaze, the heat and love emitting from her. Her pink lips

  twitched slightly, but it wasn’t in laughter. It almost seemed to be...approval.

  “I can take care of myself,” she said. “But I agree. I think you all should

  learn how to fight...but not to take care of me.” This time, her sigh was

  resigned. “There’s more to the world than me, Killian. I want you guys to

  protect yourselves, to live life to its fullest, you know?”

  I was silent for a long moment, but not because I was ignoring her.

  Instead, I processed her words.

  She seemed to severely underestimate how much she meant to me and my

  brothers. The second we had discovered the mate bond between us, she had

  become our entire world. I knew for certain that I could never go back to the

  shy, timid boy I was before I met her.

  “I don’t know who I am without you,” I admitted, and I could feel her

  body stiffen beneath mine. I cut her off before she could protest. “I said that

  wrong. I’ve changed since I met you. We all have. You make us better -

  better versions of ourselves, you could say. Not one of us wants to go back to

  the person we were before. Z, you may hate to know this, but you’re our

  world now. I didn’t know the mate bond could feel like this...feel this right. I

  want to love you. And hold you. And fuck you senseless. And-“

  “You want to fuck me senseless?” Z breathed, and I stilled. That was

  what she focused on?

  And then I realized what I had said, what I had admitted to, and panic

  raced down my veins.

  Abort mission! Abort!

  “Fuck is such a crude term,” I stuttered out.

  She propped herself onto an elbow, the gesture knocking me onto my

  back. Her golden hair provided a shield between us and the outside world.

  “So you don’t want to fuck me?” she asked innocently, batting those

  damn eyelashes of hers.

  I immediately began to backtrack.

  “Of course I want to fuck you! I want to do a lot of things to you. Why

  would you think that I don’t want to? And-“ I broke off when I saw the mirth

  dancing in her eyes. “You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”

  She pinched her thumb and pointer finger together. “Just a bit.”

  “Just a bit?” My hands flexed on her sides, tightening before releasing.

  “That’s not nice.”

  “Haven’t you heard?” She sprawled onto her back, and I crawled over

  her. The move found my legs on either side of her thighs and my hands near

  her head. “I’m not a nice person.”

  Her chest rose and fell, lust coloring her cheeks.

  And we almost lost her today. I almost lost her. The mere thought had me

  wrapping her spaghetti hair around my finger
once more.

  “You scared the shit out of me today, you know that?”

  She nodded wordlessly.

  “I can’t...” I took a deep breath to rein in my emotions. “I can’t imagine a

  world without you in it. I don’t want to live in one like that. Do you

  understand?”

  Again, she gifted me with a small nod. I wondered if she was paying any

  attention to my words. Her gaze flitted from my shoulder blades, to my

  stomach, and then back to my eyes.

  Suddenly, so suddenly that I gasped in shock, her hands grabbed my ass,

  pulling me even closer.

  Her neck strained as her pink lips clasped around my nipple. The heady

  sensation sent lightning bolts of desire straight to my perpetually hard cock. I

  groaned, squeezing my eyelids shut as her tongue swirled around my aching

  nub.

  “Fuck,” I muttered through clenched teeth. She pulled her mouth away

  with a satisfied slurp, and I dared a glance down. Her breathing was heavy,

  and her eyes were hooded. So fucking gorgeous.

  “You’ve never done this before?” she asked softly. Her hands kneaded

  my ass.

  “I’ve been saving myself. For you,” I whispered. As an Incubus, I needed

  lust to live just like a human needed food and a Vampire needed blood.

  However, that didn’t mean I had to partake in sexual activities myself. The

  pheromones that permeated the air in most brothels were substantial enough.

  Hell, I would sometimes sit in front of my brothers’ rooms and get fed.

  And of course, after I met Z, I would touch myself. A lot. But before that?

  I hadn’t ever felt the need.

  “So you haven’t...done anything?”

  “Not with a female,” I replied, my body still thrumming from her touch.

  The hands on my ass paused.

  “But with a male?” she asked. She didn’t sound disgusted, only curious

  and a little turned on. Still, my face flamed in embarrassment when I realized

  how my words could be construed.

  Chuckling nervously, I said, “No, not with a male either. Well,

  technically a male, since I do touch myself a lot.”

  Shit, Killian! Stop!

  “I meant...um...” My face was an inferno. God damn my mouth.

  She chuckled, her hands once more resuming their ministrations on my

  ass. I practically mewled like a cat in heat.

  “Don’t worry.” She leaned up once more, teeth finding my earlobe. She