Between a Rock and a Hard Place

by Bohannon, Hipsy

  “ Oh shit, man! Two, Jesus, one would have been bad enough, but two? That’s just like ya too, go big or go home right?” Able said, trying to make light of the situation, it was killing him to see the pain in his friend's eyes.

  “The real fucked up part, was that she didn't even yell at me. Instead, she looked me right in my bloodshot eyes, and said, “You don’t got me, anymore, Cole.”

  “Damn, that’s a good fucking line, though.” Able chimed in to say, already repeating it in his head.

  “Ya, I know right, and she executed it perfectly. Her voice was

  flat, her eyes filled to the brim with, let down. What the hell was I supposed to say to that? I couldn’t think of one damn reason, one excuse, or even lie that would have been good enough to make her stay. So, I just laid there, looking stupid as fuck with two Sports Illustrated models draped across my chest. And Penny, my sweet, sweet girl, well, she just turned and walked away. And, just like that, it was done, finished, kaput!" Cole announced, a bit too loud, throwing his hands in the air before letting them drop, heavy and hard, back into his lap.

  After a few, quiet moments, he glanced over to Able, finding him sheepishly rubbing at his eyes, with the sleeve of his oversized, black hoodie. He was a man in his thirties, yet, he still mostly dressed like a high school burnout from the early 90’s.

  "Dude, are you crying?" Cole questioned, narrowing his brows. "No, I just have smoke in my eyes." He quickly lied, sucking up his snot.

  It was a little traumatic, finding out that his, superhero, of a friend, had this whole other life that Able never knew anything about, until now, that is. That other life was a sad one, the story, a tragic one. It broke Able’s heart and had him feeling angry, and sad, which, was never a good combo. He turned in his spot before giving Cole a hard shove, which only really served to make Able loose his balance, wobble, and almost fall off his spot.

  "Hey, fuck head, be careful! We’re like fifty foot in the fucking air!" Cole warned, grabbing Able’s shoulder to steady him. "Fuck you, Cole, you’re an asshole! I can't believe you cheated on Penny, like that. I'm glad she left you, you didn't deserve her, anyway!" Able blurted out, letting the whiskey do his talking for him.

  A moment passed of Cole’s jaw tensing before he finally tore his hard stare away from Able. His friends words might have pissed him off but they were all true, just the same. Whiskey lips, tell no lies. He let out a deep breath, giving a little nod.

  "Yeah, you’re right man, I didn't, not even a little. That girl, was nothing but good to me, and I fucked it all up. And now, I have to live with that every damn day, and it sucks ass, trust me.” Cole admitted with a heavy breath.

  "I can't believe she even still talks to you, man.” Able scoffed, tossing the empty bottle before watching it plunge down to the earth below.

  “Yeah, well, that took some time, years, actually. The second best day of my life was spent right here in this city. I was walkin’ down the street one day, and BOOM, there she was. I couldn't believe my eyes. I had assumed that she was back in New York, living out the rest of her dreams, without me, but no, she was right here in my city. Can you believe the fucking luck of it all, that day, that minute, that street? It prolly wouldn’t happen again in a million years. It was like time hadn't even touched her and where it had, it had done so, perfectly. She was still the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, and my heart, still flipped over itself when I locked eyes with her.”

  “God damn, man, you can sure tell a fucking story; you’re killing me over here.” Able announced, gripping at his heart.

  “Ya, and it’s all true! It happened right down there at the flea market on Elm”

  “Dude, that place rocks! I got a badass set of cereal bowls there that had pictures of serial killers on them. Get it…, serial killer bowls, for your cereal?” Able laughed, giving his friends arm a playful slap.

  “Ya Able, I get it,” Cole smirked with the role of his eyes. “Anyway, I couldn't stop myself. I walked right up and grabbed her like I never wanted to let her go, and really, I didn’t. I had never stopped thinking about her, and now, here she was in my arms, safe and sound. I didn't even give her the chance to push me away, I just held on as tight as I could.”

  “Then what?!” Able was about to chew his nail off with anticipation, the hyperactive little dink.

  “Then, I got kicked…, hard…, in the shine. ‘stranger danger!’ came this pissed off little voice, and I looked down to see this kid, he was just a little thing. I couldn't believe he could even talk, let alone, kick that hard. And, so, that's how I met T.J. for the first time. Turns out, right after we split, she met up with some jackass, who got her knocked up, right before he ditched out. She had to quit school and move. She said she never liked the cold of Upstate and didn't want her son growing up in a place like that. She said that she liked living out here before, so she had decided to move back. Standing there, listening to her story, I just couldn't believe how her life had changed. Over the years, I had always pictured her up on stage, doing her thing… happy, but she hadn’t been. Instead, some dickhead had ruined it all for her.”

  “That’s not on you, though. People’s lives get fucked up all the time.” Able reminded, looking over to find that Cole, looked more then a little guilty.

  “Ya, well, not on my watch they don’t, but that time it did. I blame myself. If I hadn't cheated, and been such a damn fuck up, Penny never would have run into that douchebags arms. She never would have gotten knocked up or quit school. If I hadn’t been such a piece of shit, she could have really lived her dream.”

  “That’s some heavy shit, man.”

  “Ya, tell me about it.” Cole sighed, dropping his head in shame.

  “So, Penny Lane never danced again?”

  “Oh no, she danced again. I found out after we met back up, that she had been workin’ the clubs, stripin’ to pay her rent, and put food on the table for her and little man. He was such an awesome kid, he still is. Like the coolest kid ever, which is why I can't believe that asshole just left out on em, like he did. That asshat doesn't even deserve to be a father. I’ll tell ya one thing, right now, if Penny ever gives his name up, I'm gonna track his ass down, and break every fuckin’ bone in his body. Starting with his dick!"

  Cole's voice took on a deadly tone that had Able grabbing his junk. He had never seen his friend get so worked up. Cole was a master of keeping his cool, but in this moment, he looked downright heated.

  "So wait, I'm confused. You found the girl, the one you never stopped loving, and she was right here in your city, and single on top of that. How come you two didn't get back together? I'm sure after all that time, she was willing to forgive you. I mean, you showed her you changed, that you weren’t that asshole anymore, right?" Able questioned, as if this was the best story he had ever heard, and he now needed all the answers, or he would never be able to rest, again.

  "Man, I tried to, I tried so fuckin’ hard. I stalked the shit out of that woman. I followed her around like a damn puppy, for months on end. I offered her the world if she would just give me another chance. But, she turned me down at every turn. She didn't want it, not my money, not me. All she really wanted, was to be left alone." Cole said with the shake of his head. “Any other woman would have jumped all over the offer, especially one living the life she was, but not Penny. She was too stuck in the past, just couldn't let it go.”

  "But you didn't leave her alone, right? I mean, you’re Cole Fucking Conners, you stayed right on that shit, right?” Able questioned, clinging to his friend's shoulder. His breath, wreaking of booze, his eyes heavy and hooded.

  "Yeah, of course, I did, I dogged that girl day and night. Months passed, turning into years. And, after a while, I think she finally got sick of telling me to fuck off. So, she just let me hang around her and T.J.. Me and him, we just clicked, right from the start. I think Penny saw that; I think that's one of the only reasons she still lets me loiter around her. Not having a dad in the picture, m
eant that T.J. needed a man to show him the ropes. He's a good kid and she's a great mother, she wouldn't deny him that, just because I had fucked up. So here we are, thirteen years later. I guess you could say that we’re friends, now.” A moment passed, of Cole hating the word ‘friends’ to describe what he and Penny had together. That title just wasn’t enough, yet technically, he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to call it anything else. He decided not to stew on it. It was late, the story was over. It was time to wrap it up. “So, yeah, there ya go, that's the story of me and Penny Lane. Are ya happy now?"

  Able sat for a few moments, chewing his thumbnail. It made sense now, what Cole had said in the bar earlier, tonight. No wonder he was a bit gun shy, about dancers. Able still didn't think that was the case with Livi though, no way would she ever be a stripper, it just wasn't who she was. But, he now, knew, that that’s, why his friend was trying so hard to warn him. He just didn't want him to be hurt, like he had been hurt. Cole's heart was showing and that was rare. Able was one of the few people in the world, who knew just how deep the man beside him ran.

  "No, I’m not happy, now. Actually, I'm really sad. That's a

  terrible fucking story. The ending sucks ass! I think we need to change it, ya know, for the story’s sake." Able mused, playing with his scruffy goatee and giving Cole a, drunk, thoughtful look.

  "It’s too late for that my friend. It is what it is. I'm just lucky that I still get to be around her, lucky I get to hang out with T.J.. I can't change the past, and she can't seem to see a future with me, so, I settle for what I get. I live a good life, man. I do what I please, come and go when I want. I fuck hot bitches and make great money, drive fast cars, and live in a fuckin’ mansion of a

  house. I'm alright with the way it all turned out. It's the best that I could have hoped for, definitely more than I deserve…, that’s for sure." Cole mused, knowing it was all bullshit. It was the same shit he tried to tell himself, all the time. Always trying to play it off like he was okay with how it all went down, but he wasn't. Not even a little.

  "Blah, blah, blah, you're still fuckin’ her, ain't ya?" Able scoffed with the raise of his brow.

  "Shut up, dude!" Cole sighed out, unable to hide his smirk.

  "That's a yes, which means, that she still fucking loves you, man. Chicks aren’t like us, they don’t just go around fucking their ex's, just because it's easy. Chicks only fuck their ex's, when they’re still in love with them or they wanna piss off their new man. You and me both know that’s the truth. That girl loves you and you love her. I'm trashed off my ass drunk, and even I can see that!" Able announced, with a little sway.

  "Alright buddy, I think we better get off here before ya fall." Cole offered, pulling Able up to stand.

  "How the fuck did we even get up here, man?" Able questioned, glancing around.

  "I have no fucking clue, but damn, ain't that view?"

  News report

  "Able Grace and Cole Conners, stars of the cult hit, Brothers In Murder, were fined today, in the early morning hours. Sources say, the two were spotted by security on top of the landmark Hollywood sign. Sources go on to say, that the pair appeared to be heavily intoxicated. Witness statements are now pouring in, from across the city. One, very excited, female witness reported, seeing the two men streaking through a downtown street, while another,

  claimed to have spotted the two, urinating into a fountain located on West and Jenner. Yet another, claims to have seen them in full drag, walking a local street, known for its prostitution trade . A witness who came forward saying, she had spotted them earlier in the evening, told our station’s affiliates, that she had witnessed the pair pay, two female children, ages eight and ten, a sum of three hundred dollars each, to acquire the rights to ride the girl’s bicycles. Reports say, that the girls were very happy with the outcome, of the hour long, negotiation with the notorious two. Saying, and I quote, ‘those handsome ladies, gave us money, and then told us to stay in school, and that drugs were bad, and that last call was for pussies!’. Oh my, lucky girls Bob, lucky girls! Now, back to you Jane, in the weather center. Jane, how's it looking outside?"

  Chapter 11

  “ I didn’t know you were in here. I would have come up, a hell of a lot sooner." Ace greeted, making his way into his office to find Cole already there.

  "Yeah, sorry about that, man. I hope you don’t mind." Cole offered, leaning against the wall as he looked down at the stage below.

  Ace's office, held a large window, that looked down over the entire club. It was mirrored so that, no one from the floor below, was any wiser that their every move was being watched from up above.

  "You know you're always welcome here. I take it you didn't come to bet on the game?” Ace questioned, leaning on his large desk with his arms crossed over his chest.

  "Na, you already took me for too much, this week." Cole said with a laugh, but it didn't reach his eyes, as he glanced at the man. "No overpriced dinner tonight, for my number one girl?" Ace

  noted, jerking his head toward the giant mirror.

  "No, not tonight. Why, did she say she was hungry? I could run out and grab her something." Cole said, glancing back down at Penny as she worked over the pole, down below.

  "No, no, you're fine. I didn't hear anything. It's just usually when you come in…," Ace reminded, making his way over to lean on the window just across from Cole.

  "Yeah, not tonight. I just kinda wanted to see her for a bit, is all." Cole explained, his tone sounding a bit tired as he ran his hand through his hair.

  "It's been slow in here, all night. I'm sure she’s got time to sit with ya a while. You want me to call downstairs and get her up here, for ya? "

  "Oh no…, I don’t know, I just kinda wanna stay up here and watch her, for a bit. That’s if you don’t mind."

  "No problem at all. I understand completely. I'll leave ya to it." Ace nodded, patting Cole on the shoulder before he made his way toward the door.

  Cole had always liked Ace. The man was a straight shooter, right down the line. Over the years, they had spent many nights in this very room, talking about any and everything you can imagine. The older man cared a great deal about Penny and it showed, which had Cole, counting him as a friend.

  [E2]"Hey, um…, don’t tell her I was in tonight, okay?" Cole called out, making Ace turn to glance back his way.

  "You got it," Ace agreed, with a knowing smile, before

  exiting his office.

  Cole’s eyes, once again, found Penny down on the stage. She was a bit hostile tonight it seemed. Jerking herself around to a song about, a guy going crazy and asking a woman if she would still call him Superman. It had Cole sucking in a breath and letting it out slow. It way too fucking fitting.

  Telling Able he and Penny’s story last night, had really done him in. Bringing up a million things that he didn’t want to be reminded of.

  He had been so damn stupid, back then. He had loved her so much, yet couldn't stop doing the one thing he knew would drive her away, in the end. What the hell had he been thinking? He hadn't, that was the problem, and now, that's all he could do anymore, over think it all, every second they spent together. He never could get her out of his head. It was exhausting. She was exhausting.

  When Penny first left him, Cole knew, damn well, that he deserved it but that was years ago. He had changed so much since then, yet, she refused to take notice of it, refused to let him back in. It didn't matter how hard he tried, with Penny, it was all for nothing, it seemed. She still hadn’t gotten over it, and as time passed, he started to realize that she probably never would.

  Like his Uncle Buck had always said, ‘once a woman’s fed up, you’re fucked’. He could live without her forgiveness, really he could, as long as things continued to stay the way they were, that is. Meaning, as long as she stayed single, as long as she stayed, letting, him, be the one that got to hold her close, on the rare occasion that she had a moment of weakness. As long as he could come and go, in and out of h
er life, as he pleased. And definitely, as long as he got to keep hanging out with T.J. As long as the, ‘as longs’, kept up, he could be okay with her never letting him live down, his horrible mistakes. But one day, all that was gonna change, and all the, ‘as longs’, where gonna go right out the window. One day, she would meet someone, fall in love, and then she wouldn't need him anymore. Hell, maybe she already had.

  This new guy seemed to have Penny’s attention, in a way that Cole, hadn't seen before. She seemed to be acting differently, since she had met him, happier, maybe. Sure, it was still early in the game, only two dates in, and neither date, if you asked him, had really been hits out of the park, but even so, that's how it always starts out. One date, two dates, three dates, BOOM, that prick, is balls deep, and Penny’s ready to settle down, maybe even pop out a few more babies.The thought, had Cole rolling his eyes. Penny didn’t want any more kids and she never was too into that, picket fence, bullshit. She was too jaded for all that. He should know, he was the one who had made her that way, after all. That wasn't the point, though, the point was, one day, Penny wasn't gonna be, his, anymore. Not that she was his now, but she kinda was, in a pretty big way, whether she wanted to admit it or not.