“Are you ready?”
“No.” The word came out as a squeak.
He squeezed tighter.
The paper crinkled, and Ben cleared his throat. “To my baby girl. One of my friends is adopted, and she always wonders what her birth parents are like so I asked the agency if I could give this letter to you. I don’t know if you’ll get to read it, but I hope you do.”
From the first word, tears dripped from my chin and onto Ben’s arm.
He kissed the crown of my head. “Do you want me to go on?”
The soft comfort of his voice took some of the tightness from my throat. I wiped my face and nodded, unsure whether or not I meant it.
Another crinkle of paper. “My name is Meredith and I’m your mom. I’m a junior in high school and my boyfriend, your dad, is a senior on the football team. We love each other and wanted to raise you together but neither of us have jobs, and our parents wouldn’t help us. I’m so sorry.”
A wave of grief overtook me and I sobbed. Ben shifted behind me, and a moment later, handed me a tissue. His warm arms encircled me, held me while my body racked beneath the weight of my emotions, until the heaving stopped and only hiccups remained.
“There’s just a bit left.” His left arm released me and picked up the letter from wherever he’d set it. “I loved you from the first time your little foot poked into my belly. I sang Brahms’s Lullaby to you almost every night. You must have liked it because you always stopped moving when I did that. Someday I hope to be a writer or maybe a journalist. I’ll always think of you and wonder where you are, if you look like me. If you ever want to meet me, I hope you’ll be able to find me and can forgive me for giving you up. I can only hope I did the right thing, and you’re having a nice life. Love always, Meredith Bennit.”
Ben set the letter down and held me with both arms again. “There’s tear stains all over the paper.” His face pressed into my hair, his warmth enveloping me as another hiccupping sob broke free.
We sat in silence for a while. Numbness settled in. As the words sank into my thoughts, waves of sorrow and joy took turns flowing through me. Guilt followed as I thought of Mom and all the phone calls I hadn’t returned. She had always loved me as her own, but I couldn’t help wonder how different my life would have been and if the bond would have been different with Meredith Bennit.
Ben stroked his fingers through my hair. “Call Cameron and tell him you won’t be in today.”
“Shit.” I stood, looking at my watch. “I’m late.”
“Stay here with me.”
I shook my head and started for the door. “No. We’re shorthanded as it is. I already let Cameron down once last week, I’m not going to do it again.”
Ben came after me. “I insist. Now that I’m not taking up his time anymore, he’ll manage for today.”
The thought of curling up in Ben’s arms to sleep made me stop in front of the door. “You must have stuff to do too.” I glanced over my shoulder. “Don’t you?”
He tugged me to him, slid his hand along my throat, and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Wait here. I’ll have Brent take care of everything.”
As he went out, I stared after him, battling over the decision to protest or not. Great. Now Brent was going to think we’re headed off to knock boots like horny bunnies. A laugh crept up on me. Before I could contain it, I held my stomach and could do nothing but let it out. By the time Ben came back, my gut ached.
He flashed a bright grin. “Have I missed something?”
Through sporadic giggles, I said, “No. I guess I’m just tired, or possibly losing my mind. A bit of relief maybe.” Desperate for his touch, I reached for his hand, rubbing my thumb over his knuckles as I pressed against him. I looked up and caught his gaze, thought I might drown in the depth of his emerald eyes. “Thank you.”
He scooped me into his arms and started toward the stairs. “No. Thank you for letting me see you vulnerable, and for sharing that moment with me.” His lips met my forehead. “I’ll never forget it as long as I live.”
We spent most of the day watching movies in his bed, snuggled up naked, though I found nothing sexual about it, not that time. Pure comfort, a warm blanket that could wrap itself around me. I could have stayed that way for hours.
* * * *
I woke up sticky from sweat. Ben’s chest rose and fell in the steady rhythm of sleep. Unable to stop myself, I traced the ridges of his stomach with my fingertip until he quivered and gave a lazy laugh.
“Good morning,” I said.
“Mmm, that it is.” He pulled me on top of him, stroking my hair along my back. “I could stay here with you forever and it wouldn’t get old.”
I nibbled his jaw. “Mmm.” My eyes caught the time on his clock radio. Seven-thirty. “Shit. I need to go home and get some—”
“Already taken care of. I took the liberty of having some properly fitted women’s shirts made for you last week, and Brent did a little shopping for you yesterday afternoon.”
“He—you did?” A smile stretched across my lips. “Thank you.” I sighed. “Now I have no excuses. I need to get ready for work.”
With a groan, Ben tipped me back onto the bed. “Then we best get you in the shower, hadn’t we?”
He rolled out of bed and ambled to the door. His hypnotic rear view drew my gaze and held it. The muscles in his ass contracted and relaxed with every step. I wanted to lick my way up from the backs of his knees and reach around him for something solid to hold on to.
Before my eyes fell out of my head and rolled over for a better look, I lifted them. I caught Ben watching me over his shoulder, wearing a cocky grin.
“Don’t keep me waiting long.” His snickers died away as he walked farther down the corridor.
Oh hell. I spent two whole minutes willing my body to calm down, but my growing need to play slip and slide in the shower won out.
Wearing a giant grin, I crawled out of bed and followed the sounds of water down the hall. Pulse leaping, I opened the oak door a crack and peered inside. Through the steam, Ben leaned forward, one hand propped against the wall, head bowed under the cascade. Tiny rivers of water followed the lines of his muscular back and washed over his taut rear. Before I registered the action, I’d moved into the glassed-in stall, each step throwing another log onto my internal fire.
Hot steam engulfed me as I slid my arms around his waist and pressed my breasts against his back. He straightened and pulled my arms tighter around him. I explored his abdominals with my fingertips as my breath quickened, moved up and pressed my hands against his chest to commit every inch of him to memory.
“Turn around.” His gruff tone held a command, which I obeyed.
Ben’s soap-filled hands slid across my quivering stomach. The strength of them pulled me back against him, his excitement pressing against my ass, thick and ready. His fingers pinched my hardened nipples and massaged soap into them.
A throaty moan escaped me. “My turn.”
I spun and pushed him back against the tile, just out of the spray. The blue soap lathered in my palms. I let him see the hunger in my stare as I approached, enjoyed watching him squirm and press his hands back against the wall as if he’d fall without the support. As my hand gripped him, I took his mouth with mine. I stroked. He growled. His pleasure poured into me through his kiss.
His chest heaving, Ben steadied my hand against his manhood and pushed me under the water with him. His lips explored my neck and shoulders, while I surveyed the topography of his back and ass.
A grunt escaped him as he picked me up and carried me out of the shower, sat me on the cold countertop. A darkness in his eyes prickled my skin and turned up the heat in the room. Or maybe just within me. He parted my legs, positioned his engorged jumbo against me and stroked up and down twice as he fiddled in the drawer beneath me. After sheathing himself in a condom, he penetrated me a little with a sigh. His hands slipped along my hips and yanked me against him, plunging all the way in one quick motion.
I cried out and gripped his shoulders, under his complete control. My mind spun out into a fantastic nowhere, my only thoughts centered on his body filling mine and the pleasure that bordered on pain. His tongue filled my mouth, and our desperate animal sounds blended together in a primal harmony. I fisted my fingers into his hair and hung on while the pressure mounted, a geyser about to explode from my center.
I gasped. “I’m almost there.”
In a blink, he pulled me from the counter. The room spun and the air rushed against my hot skin as he lowered me onto the floor, his swollen member still buried deep in my body. The cold of the tile contrasted with his heat. His breath on my throat induced a tremble in me. He pushed my knees toward the floor to open me wider and pounded harder until I thought I’d lose my mind. Little wanting grunts followed every thrust.
The pressure expanded, and my muscles contracted all at once. I sucked in a breath, held it for a moment before it came out in a scream. The orgasm slammed into me, swelling and surging like storm surf from my pleasure center to the tips of my fingers and toes. A breath or two passed before Ben lost his rhythm and called out his release with a growl into my shoulder.
Aftershocks sent twinges along my southern border. I wrapped my jelly arms and legs around Ben to hold him in place and blew breaths out of my mouth to slow my heart rate. Giggles fell from my buzzing lips.
Ben raised his face to mine, slack with contentment and a lazy smile arching his lips. “Wow.”
“Yeah, wow.” I brushed a wayward curl away from his ear.
His eyes turned serious, and he stroked his thumb over my lips. “The last twenty-four hours have been the best of my life. Do you believe me?”
Tears stung my eyes. I pulled on him so I could hide against his chest, but he held me in place with his hand on my face.
“Don’t hide them from me. Just tell me whether they’re tears of joy or sadness.”
“I’m happy,” I squeaked like the pathetic romantic I never thought I’d be. With our mouths locked in an embrace, we climbed to our feet, giggling like horny teenagers on prom night.
* * * *
Dressed in a spiffy navy pin-striped suit, Ben blew me a kiss from his bedroom door. “Meet me in the surveillance room when you’re dressed.”
I opened my mouth to ask him why, but he disappeared before I got the words out. His cryptic lines had bugged me at first, but I had to admit my days with him would probably never be boring. The black dress pants Brent had bought were more comfortable than any of my others. Smiling, I pulled a lavender shirt from the rack of new ones he had ordered for me. HP appeared on the left breast in silver script and my initials, though tiny, adorned the tip of the collar. Snazzy.
For the first time ever, I dried my hair over a round brush all by myself and left it down. I walked with light steps out to meet Ben. I pushed open the door to the surveillance room. He sat on the counter below the monitors. His gaze darted to me and away again.
A ball of panic formed in my gut. I took a step toward him. “What’s wrong, B—”
“It’s about time, Ms. Ross.” Ben’s gaze gave a subtle gesture to his right. “Cameron was just telling me you were ill yesterday.”
Fuckballs. I shoved the door open and entered, letting out the breath I’d held. What if I’d run in and started dry humping him? Jeez. That was close.
Cam leaned against the server cabinet in his usual ragged gray pants and half-tucked-in blue shirt. “Hey, Eva. Feeling better?”
A tiny sound drew my gaze back to Ben. Hand rubbing his mouth, he turned away and stared at one of the monitors on the wall.
He was laughing at me. Bastard.
“Uh—yeah, much better, actually. What’s going on?”
“I’d just like an update on the surveillance system you installed last week,” Cam said. “We’ve been so busy since I got back, I haven’t had time to get myself up to speed on the work you’ve been doing.”
I narrowed my eyes. “So, when did you set this meeting up?”
Cam raised a bushy eyebrow. “Friday afternoon.”
Double bastard. Ben knew damn well Cam would be there, and after the episode with us doing it on his sofa on Monday, he never bothered to tell me. I clenched my teeth, thinking myself into my calm, happy place while imagining letting Ben have a piece of my mind.
With him on one side of me and Cam on the other, I went over everything I’d installed and how it all connected. Every time Ben moved, I stumbled over my words.
“You sure you’re okay?” Cam scratched his head and stared at me.
I shook myself mentally. “Yeah, I’m good.” I shot a glare at Ben. “Mr. Hathaway has been working me a little hard lately and I’m tired.” My brain froze when I realized what I’d said. Mortified, I added, “Are we done?”
Cam nodded. “Yeah. We’ve got a mess of tickets to deal with today so we should get going.”
When I turned to leave, Ben was gone. Probably off somewhere to laugh his fine little keister off at me.
Before we reached the outer door, Ben appeared rosy-cheeked at the top of the stairs. “A word, Ms. Ross?”
Cam shrugged, worry in his eyes as he leaned in close to my ear. “Be nice … no matter what he says.”
I waited for the door to close behind Cam, assembling the flood of curses I had for Ben before turning to face him again. He’d somehow snuck across the carpet without me hearing. He grabbed and kissed me before I could protest.
When he finished melting me into a pile of goo, he snickered and released me. “I’m working you too hard, am I? I didn’t hear any complaints in the shower this morning.”
My brain function returned after a few seconds. “Are you insane? Cam would pop a gasket if he knew we were doing the nasty up here in your office.”
“The look on your face was priceless.” He reached out, but I smacked his hand away. “I find you so endearing when you’re all flustered.”
“Yeah, so you’ve said.” A grin snuck up on me before I could stop it. “Fuck off.”
“Oh, I love it when you talk dirty to me.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me to him, whispered into my ear, “Tell me your fantasy.”
His breath on my skin made me shiver. “I’m not telling you shit. Now let me go, Cam’s waiting for me.”
“The shirt looks great, by the way. Now, tell me what I want to know and I’ll let you go.”
“Promise you’ll think about a way we can stop Richard, and I’ll consider telling you later.”
Ben heaved out a sigh. “That’s dirty pool.”
I smirked, crossed my arms, and stuck my nose in the air. “That’s my deal, take it or leave it.”
“Fine.” He squeezed me so tight my ribs creaked. “Will you come up right after work?”
My phone chirped on my belt. I held it up and read the text from Dad: Your mother kicked me out. I need to talk to you tonight.
Acid filled my stomach and a headache crept into the back of my skull. I showed him my phone. “Looks as if my dear old dad finally got what he deserved.”
“Are you going to see him?”
I considered it for a moment. Even though my anger with him continued to rage, he was still Mom’s husband, whom she loved in spite of his major shortcomings. “Yeah, I suppose I need to. For Mom’s sake.”
Ben’s arms tensed as he leaned back and gave me a hard stare. “I’m sending security with you in a car.” His fingers pressed against my lips when I opened my mouth to protest. “No arguments, Evangeline. My team picks you up here and delivers you back here.”
A thought stopped me cold. “Has something else happened?” When he tried to step away, I grabbed his hand and stopped the action. “Your mother? Or Richard?”
Ben’s lip curled in a snarl at the mention of his brother. “I just need you here where I can know you’re safe for my own piece of mind. Please.”
Taking in his sudden fear, I thought it through for a moment and decided there were worse things in life than a
man who wanted to keep me safe. “Fine.”
“Thank you.”
I opened the door before I turned back to him, a new tension stiffening my shoulders. “We’re not done talking about this, though. When I get back here tonight, you’re going to tell me what’s happening.”
Without waiting for a response, I exited on tense legs. I didn’t intend to take no for an answer.
After buying a muffin from the vending machine and pouring myself a coffee, I sat at my desk and fired up my laptop.
“Hey, Eva?”
Cam’s voice came from right behind me. My insides lurched, but I didn’t think it showed. “Yeah?”
“Can I see you in my office?”
Oh hell. What now? “Yeah, sure.”
I followed him inside Castle Grayskull and shut the door, fighting my gag reflex.
He sat behind his desk, and I stood by the door, my toe taping against the tile and my fingers fiddling with the bottom button of my new shirt.
Slouched back in his chair, he scanned me up and down. “What’s up with you? Roses, new haircut, humming to yourself.” He grinned. “Who is he?”
I mocked a laugh at him. “Ha ha, very funny. Even if there was a guy, my personal life is none of your business.”
Cam nodded. “You’re right, so I’ll ask something that is my business. What’s going on between you and Mr. Hathaway?”
Chapter 17
My face froze as I stared at Cam across the paper metropolis on his desk. “What do you mean? I’m not doing anything with Mr. Hathaway.” Leg bouncing, I curled my fingers around the hem of my shirt and took a step closer, narrowed my eyes. “Why? What did you hear?”
Cam cocked his head, his brows bunching together. “I didn’t hear anything. You were just acting weird around him this morning.”
My mouth dried up, making it hard to swallow. “Weird? Weird, how?”
“Like all tense and jumpy. Did you go at him over some feminist uniform issue? Is that why he had somebody order you that new shirt?”
Crossing Hathaway Page 15
