Make Me Disappear

by Jennifer Wilson

  Mabel sat quietly, wondering how to answer. Was she crazy? Had Hemingway really visited her in the night and given her strength to go on? Or was it all a hallucination brought on by stress and blood loss? She didn’t know what to think herself, but she cleared her throat and began.

  “Hemingway came to me,” she said.

  “Jane, I’m ser—” he began, but stopped when he saw the look on her face. She spoke the next words in a rush.

  “He did, Jake. He came to me, walking on the water. He cooked me fish and helped me sail. I couldn’t have done it without him, just like you said. I don’t know the north star from the sun.”

  Jake stood staring at her, mouth open slightly, trying to absorb the words she had said.

  “Walking…on the water,” he said slowly. “It must have been a hallucination, Jane. It must have—”

  “But there was the fish that we ate together,” she said, leaning forward earnestly. “I cleaned it up the next day. He fixed it for me. And the fact that we did get back here. A hallucination couldn’t have done that.”

  “Maybe…” he said, running his hand through his hair until it stood on end.

  “All I know is what I saw,” she said. “And he was Hemingway, through and through, everything about him. I know it sounds crazy, Jake, but I’m not crazy. At least, not like that.”

  “I know you’re not crazy, Jane,” Jake said, shaking his head. “I don’t know what to think. Not at all. But I’m glad you got us back somehow, or I’d have been a goner by the next evening. The doctor said so.”

  They sat on the deck that evening and ate grilled chicken from the bar, delivered to them by Gina herself, who dropped a kiss upon Jake’s cheek as she left. Jake asked Mabel what she had been doing besides hiding from the police while he was in the hospital.

  “Well…” she said, flushing a little. “I have a date on Friday night.”

  “You what?” Jake coughed on his chicken and looked at her, almost more incredulous than he had been when she told him about Hemingway.

  “I have a date,” she repeated. “With this guy I met. His name is Carl.”

  “But Jane, what do you know about him? I mean, where did you meet him? How do you know he’s okay?”

  She laughed at his concern.

  “I met him at South Beach on my first day off. He’s nice. He works at the Panini place and goes to the community college. He’s studying to be an EMT.”

  “Okay,” he said, his forehead still deeply furrowed. “What are you going to do on this date?”

  “Go to a movie. Get something to eat, I guess. What do people do on dates?”

  “Just that I guess. Plus some other things, sometimes. Jane, are you sure you’ll be okay?”

  “I’m sure, Jake. I’ll be fine.”

  Friday dawned rainy and dark, and so Mabel set about cleaning the cabin of the boat, a ministration it was deeply in need of. She scrubbed the blood splatters off the walls and stripped the sheets off the bunks, stuffing them one at a time into the tiny washing machine and clipping them to the lifeline when they were done, hoping the rain would hold off long enough to give them a chance to dry.

  “This place is going to be ship-shape when you’re done,” Jake joked, looking up from the Agatha Christie novel he was reading. She stuck her tongue out at him and went into the bathroom to wipe it down with disinfectant. When she was finished she went to stand on the deck, antsy and unsure of what to do next.

  Crossing to the bar and grill, she sat down and ordered a club sandwich, waving at Gina in the bar area, but once the food arrived she could only eat a few bites. Her stomach was jumpy and nervous and excited and happy all at once at the prospect of seeing Carl again.

  “Ms. Ennis?” a voice said by her elbow.

  “What?” she said, turning.

  A slight man with a carefully groomed goatee stood on the boardwalk with a kindly smile on his face. He was dressed in business-casual clothing and looked out of place among the bathing suit and shorts-clad set that frequented the area.

  “Jane Ennis?”

  “Yes,” she said, the blood pulsing loudly in her ears. She looked furtively around for help from Gina, but she wasn’t in sight. The small man moved closer and put his hand out.

  “I’m David Hunter; I’m a reporter for Hello Magazine, maybe you’ve heard of it?

  She had heard of it; it was on all the newsstands and grocery store check-outs.

  “If you are familiar at all with our magazine, then you know that we do human interest stories in every edition. We’d very much like to do one on you.”

  “I…I’d really rather not,” she said.

  “Are you sure? It would be a very complimentary piece; all about how you fought off your attacker and saved the life of your uncle. Real woman-power stuff.”

  “No,” she shook her head. “I really don’t want to.”

  “Okay, well, it’s not my job to force anybody to be in our magazine. Can I just ask you a few questions?”

  “Okay,” she said, hoping to get rid of him quickly.

  “Your family comes from Miami, right? Are you an only child?”

  “Yes.”

  “And you’re eighteen years old?”

  “Yes.”

  “Funny, you don’t really look eighteen.”

  Mabel shrugged.

  “Mr. Ennis is your uncle on your father’s side, or your mother’s?”

  “Father’s.”

  “Okay, well, I’m sorry you don’t want to do the piece. I’ll be going now. Enjoy your afternoon, okay?”

  “Okay, thanks.”

  He strode away, but Mabel saw him stop at Stella Luna and speak for a few minutes to Jake before he moved on and disappeared from sight. When she went back to the boat, she asked him about it.

  “He wanted to interview me, but I declined, to say the least,” Jake said. “I don’t know when they’ll finally get tired of this story and move on. They’ll want to make a movie next.”

  Mabel sighed. “It’s only been a week yet.”

  “At any rate, don’t let it ruin your date tonight, Jane,” he said, interpreting her gloomy look correctly. “I’m sure something else newsworthy will happen soon and they’ll lose interest in us and our bad-guy ass-kicking skills. Or rather, your bad-guy ass-kicking skills.”

  “I hope so,” she answered.

  At five o’clock Carl arrived, striding down the boardwalk, looking resplendent in jeans and a simple button down shirt, and Mabel’s heart thudded in her chest at the sight of him. She had bought a new sundress from a local boutique just for the occasion, and she came up from below deck to greet him.

  “Hey Jane,” Carl said, smiling broadly as he stood on the dock looking up at her. “You look pretty.”

  “Hey Carl,” she answered in what she hoped was a casual tone. “So do you.”

  “You coming aboard?” Jake said, coming around the helm and stretching out his hand to the young man.

  “Sir,” said Carl, taking his hand and shaking it firmly as he stepped onto the deck. “I saw you on the news. How’s the shoulder?”

  “Oh, it’s healing. Slowly but surely, slowly but surely.”

  “I was telling Jane that you guys are celebrities around here,” he said. “You’re famous.”

  Jake laughed heartily and shook his head.

  “What movie are you going to see, then?” he asked.

  “I thought we’d go see that thriller. The one about the kid with special powers, you know?”

  “Oh yeah; I heard that was good.”

  “Well, we’d better get a move on I guess.” Carl held his hand out to Mabel and she took it. They climbed down from the boat and waved to Jake as they disappeared. Jake stood for a moment and then crossed to the bar, where he found Gina. She served him his whiskey and he winked at her.

  “Kid went to a movie,” he said. “Not sure how long she’ll be gone. Not sure what to do with myself. What did I used to do before she came along?”

 
“I can think of a thing or two,” Gina said with a small smile.

  At the movie, Carl put his arm around Mabel’s shoulders and she leaned into him. The last movie Mabel had gone to the theater for was a Disney film when she was seven and living with a family of five. They had gone for a birthday, she remembered, although not her own. As the opening credits rolled, she looked up at Carl.

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “It’s barely started yet,” he laughed.

  “Still. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome,” he said, and kissed her on the nose.

  The movie was fantastic, Mabel thought, with plenty of character development mixed with action, and she thoroughly enjoyed herself. When it was over she joined with several audience members and applauded.

  “That was wonderful,” she sighed as they walked out. “And a happy ending, too. I really loved it.”

  “And I loved watching you love it,” Carl remarked. “You were more entertaining than the film itself.”

  “Really?” she said, blushing. “Should I be embarrassed?”

  “No,” he said, taking her hand as they walked. “Definitely not. What do you want to eat?”

  “How about pizza?” she said.

  “How about it,” he nodded. “I know a great place; brick oven, coal fired pies. Excellent. Let’s go.”

  They walked several blocks to the restaurant, where they ordered a large pepperoni and black olive and made short work of it.

  “So when will you go back to school?” Carl asked. “To study marine biology, you said?”

  Mabel shrugged, and thought quickly of how to turn the conversation around.

  “I don’t know. I’m really enjoying Jake’s boat right now. I said I’d only take a year, but I’m thinking maybe I’ll do more than that. What about you? When do you graduate and be an EMT?”

  “Just one more year,” he said.

  “Maybe I should do that too,” she said. “It would be nice to be able to help people when they’re hurt.”

  “Yeah, it’s pretty interesting stuff to learn about,” he said. “Though not everyone is cut out for it. If you’re squeamish about blood and stuff, I mean.”

  “Oh yeah,” Mabel said with a toss of her head. “I’m definitely not squeamish.”

  “I guess not,” he laughed. “Carving up bad guys is your superpower, right?”

  “That’s right.”

  “Want to go to my house?” he asked. “You could meet my mom.”

  “Sure,” she said. He paid the tab and they walked back to the theater to his car and climbed in.

  At his house Mabel met Carl’s mother Susan, a tall, thin woman with long blond hair and the same piercing blue eyes as her son.

  “I’m so glad to meet you, Jane,” she said. “Carl has talked about you nonstop.”

  Mabel blushed.

  “Jane, do you want a drink or anything?” Carl asked, opening up the fridge. “We’ve got soda and stuff.”

  “Sure. I’ll take one.”

  He handed her a Dr. Pepper and they went to the living room, where he turned on the television. The news was on, and with a shock, Mabel saw her own face projected there. Pictures of her taken with a telephoto lens, grainy but recognizable, littered the screen.

  “Oh hey,” Carl said. “There you are again.”

  Jane Ennis, the beautiful blond reporter was saying, who slew notorious bank robber Donald Freeman and saved her uncle’s life in a daring high-seas adventure, has fast become a local legend here in Key West. But is she really who she says she is? Stay tuned for the rest of the story…

  Mabel snatched up the remote, which seemed unreasonably slippery in her grasp, and fumbled to hit the off button. The television went off with a snap, but the damage was done. Her heart was fluttering like a bird in a snare, and she thought she might be sick to her stomach.

  “Jane?” Carl was asking from very far away. “Jane, are you all right? What were they talking about?”

  “I need to go home,” she said faintly. “I…I need to go right now. Please.”

  “Sure, sure you can,” he said, standing. “Come on, I’ll take you.”

  She stood, but her legs felt like they belonged to someone else, and she walked woodenly to the door. Susan called a good-bye, but she didn’t hear. They drove back to the harbor in silence, Carl casting worried glances her way.

  “Jane,” he said when they arrived, before she could bolt out the door. “I don’t know what that was all about, but I just wanted to say I had a really nice time with you tonight. I hope I can see you again.”

  Mabel nodded slightly and opened the door, breathing great gulps of the night air and trying to calm her racing thoughts.

  “Things are going to change a lot now,” she choked out. “But I’ve loved my time with you.”

  He leaned over and kissed her then, wiping away the tears that tracked down her face.

  “Can’t you just tell me what it’s all about?”

  “I’m sorry,” she sobbed, and ran for the safety of Stella Luna, and Jake.

  Seventeen

  Jane Ennis was once more Mabel Banner, fifteen year old foster kid, runaway from Oklahoma, and person of interest in the slaying of one Ms. Gail Thomas.

  “Jane…I mean, Mabel,” Jake said as the authorities came to take her back to Oklahoma. “Write me. Please. I gave you my email; use it. Okay? Let me know how you’re doing?”

  She nodded, not trusting herself to speak. She had already cried more than should have been physically possible, and she was exhausted.

  “Yes. Mabel, let us know, whatever happens,” Gina said.

  They hugged her, and Mabel clung to Jake.

  “Just be strong,” he whispered into her ear, heart breaking for the girl he had only just begun to get to know. “You can do this. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever known.”

  Mabel was strong. She stood trial and recited the abuses she had suffered in a clear, even voice that had the jurors marveling at her composure. The noxious room behind the store had long since been discovered, so with corroboration from the other foster daughters who testified that Gail had made Mabel “work the store”, the verdict of not guilty by reason of self-defense was not difficult to obtain.

  She was strong when the press asked their probing questions, when the media demanded to know all about her former whereabouts and what she had done with her time. She spoke in a calm, detached manner of Jake and Stella Luna and Gina and Key West, and didn’t shed a tear when they asked if she missed them.

  She was strong when they placed her in her new foster home, with a middle-class couple by the name of Bob and Julie, who had no children but two French bulldogs who made her smile with their antics and unconditional affection.

  She was strong when she started school again, startling her literature teachers with her extensive knowledge of Hemingway, and pulling straight A’s. She studied hard, kept to herself, and made no friends. She took up sketching and drew many fine pictures of Stella Luna, the ocean, and Jake.

  She was strong when she went to therapy and told the counselors of the fears and nightmares that plagued her nights, her compulsive need to be alone and the urges that whispered to her that she was damaged goods and that cutting was the release she needed. She was put on anti-anxiety meds, and they helped. Most of the time.

  She was strong when she wrote to Jake, making sure to emphasize the good that was happening so as not to worry him, telling him that she was doing fine. She sent the emails often, and was never happier than when she received one back from him. He told her funny stories of his new first mate, who was worthless and smoked pot constantly, and of how much he missed her.

  She was strong, and brave, and good, and she held her dreams close to her heart and shared them with no one but the bulldogs when they sat on her lap and fawned for attention. They looked at her with their laughing faces and whined when she scratched their bellies and licked her tears away before they could even fall.

 
Nineteen

  Jake stepped off Stella Luna and headed for the bar, where Gina met him with a kiss and a glass of whiskey. It was an achingly beautiful evening in Key West, late spring, and the weather was turning out days like pearls, each one more transcendent than the last.

  “How was your day?” she asked.

  “Just long,” he answered, sipping at the amber liquid and smiling. “You’re a sight for sore eyes, though.”

  “Oh pshaw,” she said.

  “Lost my first mate again,” he said with a sigh.

  “Again!” she exclaimed.

  “Yep. Just couldn’t handle the hours, I guess. Called in well this morning right before my first gig.”

  “I guess some things never change,” a voice said behind him. He turned to see a stunning young woman with a radiant smile standing with a suitcase in her hand.

  “Mabel!” he cried, and jumped off the stool to wrap her in a hug. Gina came around the side of the bar and enveloped her as well. “You didn’t say you were coming!”

  “I wanted to surprise you. I hope that’s okay.”

  “Okay? It’s fantastic!”

  “You hungry?” Gina asked, motioning for her to sit down.

  “When am I not?” Mabel laughed, sitting. Gina brought sandwiches and sweet tea and she and Jake sat with the girl, peppering her with questions.

  “I can’t believe it’s been three years already,” Jake said, shaking his head. “How’s it feel to be out of the foster care system?”

  “Wonderful,” she answered, between bites of sandwich. “Bob and Julie are great people; they treated me really well, but I was ready to be on my own. More than ready.”

  “I guess so,” Gina said. “You’ve already lived through more than most people do their whole lives.”

  “And what are your plans, Mabel?” Jake asked. “Are you going to college?”

  “Already enrolled in Gulf Coast University,” she said, nodding. “I’m going to study Literature. I’ll only be a few hours away.”

  “Oh honey, that’s just wonderful,” Gina exclaimed.

  “Yeah, that’s great,” Jake said. “What about this summer? Do you have a place to stay? More to the point, do you want a job?”