by Noelle Adams
No sooner had he started dishing out the food then Isabella started to speak.
“Were you spying on me?” she asked with a bit of defensiveness.
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. You didn’t mention that you were going in to town when I left here earlier. I thought you were going to be at a poker game. Then you just happen to see me at the coffee shop? Seriously?”
A mirthless laugh escaped before he could stop it. “Funny, when you left here, you said you were going to your parents’ house, and yet somehow ended up having coffee with Cliff.” He did his best to keep his tone level and to not add to an already volatile situation by raising his voice.
Isabella put a few items on her plate, but simply pushed them around with her fork rather than eating. “I did go to my parents, but Cliff called and… I don’t know. I just figured I’d go and meet him for coffee. It seemed like the thing to do.”
Jace saw red.
The thing to do? What the hell did that mean? Which was exactly what he demanded, standing up from his chair.
She looked up at him with wide eyes. “I don’t see what the big deal here is or why you’re so surprised.” She jumped to her feet as well. “I never lied to you, Jace. Not once! All this time you knew what I was looking for! What I wanted!”
“Earlier today you wanted me!”
That little outburst seemed to shock them both. For a long time they stood breathless and stared at one another.
For the life of him, Jace wasn’t sure what to do or say next. Was she going to deny what she felt—what they’d been doing—and why?
Her silence just seemed to rile him up even more. “How is it that you can go from my bed to a date, Bella, huh?” He took a step toward her. “How can you possibly do that? Does what we have mean nothing to you?”
“I… it wasn’t… you said nothing was going to change!” She’d raised her voice now too. “I told you it would! Sex always does. We never fought before. We never had this kind of awkwardness between us. Now look at us!”
He was ready to yell something back, but the catch in her voice stopped him. Isabella turned her back on him, and he could see her trembling. Not once in all their years of friendship had he ever been able to handle her tears.
He still couldn’t.
Stepping forward, Jace put his hands on her shoulders and went to turn her around, but she jerked out of his grasp. When she faced him, her eyes were wet with tears. “I can’t do this anymore, Jace. I thought I could. I really, really did. And… and… I won’t settle for crumbs. I need more.”
“Crumbs? What are you—”
“I’ve just been taking what I can get, but it’s not enough for me. And now everything is ruined.”
“Okay, okay… let’s just try and calm down. I think—”
“No! You don’t you get it. Everything has changed. It’s ruined! And now I’m not sure I can even just hang out with you anymore!”
Panic gripped him by the throat. “Don’t say that!”
“But what if it’s true? I come over here, and all I can think about is how much I want you and—”
“Say it again,” he said, his voice husky and thick.
Isabella blinked at him as if she didn’t quite understand what he had said.
“Say it, Bella.”
He saw her swallow hard. “Say what?” she asked, her voice still a little shaky.
“Say that you want me.”
This was it. The make-or-break moment. They had rarely talked in the heat of passion before. But now he needed the words. He wanted to say them to her as well.
“Bella.”
“I want you,” she whispered, so soft that he almost didn’t hear her.
Reaching out, his hand wrapped around her nape, and he roughly pulled her toward him. “Again.”
“I want you.” Her voice was stronger this time.
“God, Bella. You have no idea what hearing you say that does to me.”
“Show me.”
They’d had sex on the floor, on the couch, against the wall, and right now he was ready to add kitchen table to their repertoire, but rather than pounce, he opted to seduce.
Leaning forward, he trailed kisses from her temple, down across her cheek, her jawline and her throat. He gently bit where her pulse was rapidly beating and felt her shudder against him. The feel of her body against his was like hitting the launch button. He was already hard and primed, and it took every ounce of willpower to do this right.
While he continued to kiss and nip at her soft skin, he told her what he wanted to do. “I’m going to show you all night long how much I want you, sweet Bella,” he murmured. “I’m going to take my time and touch every beautiful inch of you.” Then he raised his head. “If you’ll let me.”
Isabella licked her lips and nodded, her eyes glazed and clouded with passion. She was sexy as hell, and she didn’t even realize it.
Taking her by the hand, he led her to his bedroom and said a silent prayer of thanks that it was relatively clean. Together they moved as if choreographed toward the bed. Isabella sat, and then Jace followed her down, stretching out beside her.
His hands never stopped moving. His lips were never far from her delectable mouth. He had her naked in moments, and then he took his time looking at her—all of her. The sight of her sprawled out just for him stole his ability to speak.
And speaking was highly overrated when all he wanted to do was touch her, taste her.
And he did.
“Jace!” she cried out as he sucked gently on one hardened nipple and then the other. Once large hand splayed across her belly as he suckled her. Isabella’s breath was ragged as she writhed against him. “More. I want more.”
There was no way he was moving away from her breasts just yet, so he let his hand skim down until he was cupping her and smoothly inserting one finger, then two, inside her. Isabella’s back arched off the bed, and he felt a sense of pure male pride that he could bring this kind of a reaction out in her.
By now he knew what she liked, knew what he would make her come. But he wasn’t ready for that yet. He wanted to tease her, touch her, play with her.
Isabella’s head thrashed from side to side as Jace’s fingers teased in and out of her. He knew she was getting close. He honed in on her clit and applied just enough pressure to send her soaring. She cried out his name, and he immediately crushed her mouth with his, swallowing her cries, her pleas, even as he cursed the fact that he was still dressed.
Lucky for him, Isabella was on the same page, and together they worked on getting him naked.
And fast.
No sooner had his boxers hit the floor then he was watching as Isabella slid a condom on him. God, he loved how her hands felt around him—so soft, so sure… so damn good.
“Now, Bella,” he growled, covering her body with his. “I need to be in you right now.”
And with a sexy smile, she lay back and spread her legs in invitation.
So. Damn. Hot.
The instant he slid into her wet heat, he groaned with satisfaction. “So tight, Bella. I love how tight you are around me.”
“You feel so good,” she purred, wrapping her legs around him. “So deep. So so deep…”
Somewhere in the back of his mind, Jace knew he’d wanted to go slow, but he couldn’t. Didn’t even want to anymore. He needed to move—to claim. They found their rhythm, and she met him thrust for thrust. Their breaths mingled, tongues tangled as they moved together. It just kept getting better and better. Nothing would ever feel as good as Isabella wrapped snugly around him as she panted his name.
He loved how she felt.
He loved the things she said.
He loved… her.
So much so that it hurt.
“Yes, Jace… just like that. It’s so good. So good. I love it,” she said in a breathy tone.
He knew he was close, but he needed her to come again. Gently, he nipped on her earlobe. “Come for me, sweet Bella.
Come for me, baby.” Shifting positions slightly, adjusting his angle, he knew the instant he hit her clit in just the right way.
“That’s it… right there… oh, oh, oh!” She clamped tight around him as she came. She made needy sounds. She clutched at him. “Yes, yes, yes… God, I love it… I love it…”
And then he was there. His body tightened as he came in a hot rush inside of her. “I love you, Bella! I love you so much,” he gasped out as he emptied into her. “I always have, baby… always… always.”
Thirteen
Isabella’s mind was filled with such a rush of pleasure, joy, and satisfaction that she couldn’t do anything but gasp as she tried to recover from the intensity of their lovemaking.
She felt so incredibly good. All over. Body and heart.
Like finally everything about her world had put itself together.
Jace wanted her too. Every bit as much as she wanted him.
He cared about her in exactly the same way she cared about him.
That much had been more than clear in the way he’d taken her just now. All the details were a blur, but she at least knew that much.
Nothing else really mattered.
At least, not right now.
Jace was just as breathless as he took care of the condom and then pulled her into his arms under the covers. She pressed herself against him, loving the feel of his warm body.
Loving everything about him.
He was Jace, and there was no other Jace in the world.
She couldn’t think clearly enough to even speak, but it felt like they didn’t need to.
For the moment, everything was perfect, and she could rest in that knowledge, in that peace.
She fell asleep after just a few minutes.
***
She woke up briefly once or twice, but only for long enough to cuddle up against Jace again and drift back off to sleep.
It was still dark in the room. He was sleeping too, and there was no reason yet to wake up.
The next time she woke up, light was coming in from around the edges of the blinds. She blinked at the clock until she could read that it was almost seven in the morning.
Still early. She didn’t have to get moving quite yet.
With a sigh of satisfaction, she rolled over so she was facing Jace. His eyes were still closed, and he looked so peaceful, like he was sated, like he was just as happy as she was, even in his sleep.
She smiled as she played out the details of the evening before, thrilling over the memory of the words he’d said, the ways in which he’d touched her.
All was good until her memory made it to the climax. He’d said something as he’d come. It was a blur of heat and pleasure, since she’d just come herself, but there was something about it, something significant…
She frowned as she tried to remember exactly what he’d said.
He’d said he loved her.
Her heart leapt in excitement at the knowledge.
She loved him too. She always had, and it seemed inevitable, so right, that their love should have transformed into something else over the last few weeks.
But that wasn’t all he had said.
He’d said more.
He loved her. Always had. Always had.
She sat up in bed as the memory tightened into clarity.
Maybe he’d meant he’d always loved her as a friend—the way she’d loved him—but now that she was hearing him rasp out the words again, she somehow knew he meant differently.
She’d assumed his feelings had changed the way hers had, but evidently they hadn’t.
Had he loved her all this time?
Had he wanted her all this time?
Had he kept it a secret from her, never telling her something that went so deep, something she really needed to know?
She tried to breathe slowly, think clearly, work things out in a rational way.
But there was no rationality that could overcome the sudden wave of grief and betrayal that swept over her.
Suddenly, all of his strange behavior over the last couple of weeks made sense.
He’d loved her all this time. He hadn’t wanted her to date anyone but him.
All this time he’d been pretending to be supportive when he was really keeping secrets from her.
Lying to her.
Jace. Whom she’d trusted more than anyone. Whom she’d foolishly believed would never deceive her.
She was almost choking as she scrambled out of bed, searching the floor for her clothes and grabbing them as she stumbled toward the front door of the apartment.
There was no way she could be reasonable about this. She might as well try to be reasonable about the ground opening up beneath her.
There was no logic to make it go away.
The only thing left to do in the face of this kind of crumbling foundation was to run.
She was mostly dressed as she hurried down the hallway and out of the building. It was a beautiful day, and the sunrise was casting a lovely orange shading onto the world.
Isabella couldn’t appreciate it, though. She half walked, half ran toward the parking lot.
Her car was there. Her car could take her away.
Maybe then she could think, figure out what was happening here, figure out how she was supposed to react to Jace betraying her trust the way he had.
She was so blinded by emotion that she almost ran into a young woman walking toward her on the sidewalk, carrying a large box.
The near collision caused the woman to jerk, and the box started to slide out of her hands.
Reacting instinctively, Isabella reached out to grab the box so it didn’t fall sideways onto sidewalk and spill out all its contents.
“Oh, thank you,” the woman said with a slightly hassled smile. “That thing weighs a ton.”
The woman was very pretty, with a sweet face, red hair, and a dimple on the right side of her mouth. Isabella had never seen her before.
“Are you moving in?” she asked, glad of the momentary distraction from the heartache that seemed to be waiting for her behind a door in her mind that was about to be ripped open.
“Yes,” the woman said. “I’m Daisy. It’s nice to meet you.”
Daisy’s smile was so warm and sincere that Isabella tried to smile back. “I’m Isabella. I don’t live in the building but my… my friend… does.”
She hated stumbling over the word. Jace had been her friend for so long.
In what kind of world would that no longer be true?
Daisy’s smile faded as she looked at Isabella’s face. “Are you okay?”
Nodding, Isabella tried again to smile. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.” It felt like her eyes were burning as she thought about Jace back in the apartment.
He would wake up to find her gone.
She couldn’t stand the idea of it.
But she just had to get away so she could think.
“I’m sorry,” Daisy murmured, obvious sympathy on her face. “I’ll let you go. I need to hurry anyway. My dad’s coming over in a few hours to move me in, and I want to have most of the boxes done by then. He thinks I can’t do anything on my own, so I’d like to prove him wrong.” She was smiling again as she leaned back down to pick up the box.
Isabella was faintly interested in this piece of information and wondered what Daisy’s family was like. But she didn’t have the emotional energy to dwell on it at the moment. “Good luck,” she said, as she started walking toward her car.
She’d reached the driver’s side door when a voice called out from behind her. “Bella! Bella, wait!”
She knew who it was, of course.
Jace.
She turned her head to see him running down the front steps. He wore nothing but a pair of sweats. Not even any shoes.
She probably would have had time to get into the car and put it into drive before he reached her. She could have escaped from this conversation.
But that felt weak. And like a betrayal.
S
he didn’t want to do that to him.
So she took a deep breath and turned to face him, her back to her car. She was trembling when he reached her.
“What’s the matter?” he demanded, breathless, his eyes searching her face anxiously. “Why are you leaving like this?”
He would know that something was wrong. She never would have left without a word otherwise.
She tried to say something, but the words caught in her throat. She made nothing but a strangled sound.
Jace’s features twisted. “Bella, baby, what’s the matter?”
Her head jerked to the side at the hoarse endearment.
She loved when he called her that, but it was wrong.
It was wrong.
All of this was wrong now, when she’d thought last night it felt so right.
“You…” She had to clear her throat and start again. “You said you loved me.”
Jace’s face changed as enlightenment evidently dawned in his mind. “Oh.”
“Did you mean it?”
There was a moment’s pause before he admitted softly, “Yes. I did. I love you.”
She took a ragged breath. “You said… you said you always have… loved me. Did you mean that too?”
Another pause before he said, “Yes. I meant it. I’ve always loved you.”
Her heart should be bursting with joy at the words, but it didn’t. It felt frozen, constricted, in her chest. “And you never told me?”
Jace opened his mouth, but this time didn’t say anything. He just shook his head.
“You lied to me?”
“I didn’t lie to you, Bella. I just—”
“You did lie. You’ve been keeping this secret, and you never admitted it, even when we were talking about all kinds of things that… that mattered. You were deceiving me about your feelings. Don’t you dare say that you weren’t.” The tears that had been trapped in her eyes were starting to stream down her face now.
She couldn’t help it. Couldn’t stop it.
“Oh, baby,” Jace murmured, reaching out to brush them away. “Please don’t cry. I did keep the secret, but I didn’t know what else to do.”
