Under Control

by Shannon Stacey

  But then an image of her asleep in the back seat of a stranger’s car flashed through his mind and his fingers tightened around hers.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” He knew it was probably the safest way for her to travel if she didn’t want to drive herself, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. “Of course I’m okay. I finally have a good reason to look forward to a Monday.”

  She laughed, and he let go of her hand to wrap his arm around her shoulders and pull her close. Going in for the kiss was easier than jumping out of a plane this time, but the feeling it gave him was no less exhilarating.

  When he heard a car pull up and slow, he reluctantly ended it. “Send me a text when you know about what time you’ll arrive Monday. And please text me when you get home tonight so I don’t lie in bed worrying about you falling asleep in a stranger’s car.”

  She laughed. “I will. Enjoy your pizza and bowling night.”

  Once she was in the car, he waved and then shoved his hands in his pockets. He knew once he went back inside, the guys were going to grill him about Olivia. Especially Scott, probably, since he’d made it clear he thought she was out of Derek’s league. And they’d probably ask a lot of questions he didn’t know the answers to yet.

  But the one answer he did know made him smile as he pulled open the glass door. Yes, he and Olivia were officially dating.

  Chapter Seven

  Derek was never going to get used to ringing his own damn doorbell. It wasn’t his anymore, and hadn’t been for a while, but the small cape had been his for a long time. Standing on the front step, waiting for somebody to answer the door would never feel right.

  Amber had met Jason two weeks after Derek moved out and they’d hit it off immediately. Even Derek had to admit they were perfect for each other. At first he’d felt some jealousy and sometimes even anger, but seeing them together had gotten easier with time. Amber deserved to be happy, and Derek knew living in a happy home was the most important thing for his kids. And he’d seen the difference it made in them, and especially in Julia.

  He wouldn’t mind having some of that happy home stuff for himself, though. Eventually.

  Jason answered the door. “Hey, Derek, come on in.”

  It was never easy walking into the living room—and maybe never would be—but like everything else about the divorce, he took comfort in believing they were all better off for it. And the new furniture helped. It wasn’t really his living room anymore.

  “Amber’s in the kitchen, doing her grocery list. The kids will probably be a few more minutes because they have to finish putting their laundry away before they can go.”

  “Thanks. How are things?”

  “Good. And you?”

  “Good.” That was usually as far as they got in conversation unless Amber or the kids were part of it—not because of animosity, but because they didn’t have a lot in common—so Derek went into the kitchen.

  “The kids are almost ready.”

  “Laundry. Jason told me. Do you mind if I help myself to a soda?”

  She chuckled and shook her head. “Of course not.”

  He went to the fridge and grabbed a soda. She didn’t care if he got himself a drink and he knew it, but it didn’t seem right to go into the fridge as if it was his own, just as it didn’t seem right to walk in without ringing the doorbell. Amber didn’t feel the same way, since half the time she walked into his apartment without knocking, but it was different. His apartment was just his apartment. This house was Jason’s house now.

  “So, I heard you were kissing Olivia McGovern at the pub,” she said out of the blue, and he almost choked on his drink.

  “What?”

  “You heard me.”

  He wasn’t sure why she sounded...maybe not mad, but at least a little unhappy. It shouldn’t be jealousy, since she literally had a new husband. “Yeah, I heard you.”

  She looked at him while the seconds ticked away, until the silence became too much for her. “And?”

  “And what?”

  Maybe they got along better now than the last few years of their marriage, but she’d given him a few lectures when she first started dating Jason about how her personal life was only his business when it involved their children. He’d had some trouble wrapping his head around the concept since everything she did affected their children—especially bringing a man he didn’t know into their lives—but they’d eventually found a balance. This was the first time he’d been on this end of the boundary blurring, though.

  “Derek.”

  “What are you after here, Amber? Yes, I kissed a woman at Kincaid’s.” He refrained from pointing out she was doing a lot more than kissing the man in the other room because it wasn’t relevant and he wasn’t getting into a pissing match with her.

  “No, you kissed a woman who’s brand-new to the charity and, from what I’m hearing, is going to be a huge asset. I just don’t want you to scare her off.”

  “Thanks. That’s really flattering.” Then he chuckled, because he knew what she was getting at. “Olivia’s not a woman who scares easily, I don’t think. And it’s not like she walked through the door and I pounced on her. We’d met once, before either of us knew the other was with Village Hearts, and we had a brainstorming dinner together before the fundraiser at the pub.”

  “Oh.” Then she smiled. “Oh?”

  “Aren’t you the one who was preaching boundaries when it came to dating other people?” he asked, but with no heat in his voice.

  “Wait. Are you actually dating this Olivia woman? I mean, I want things to go smoothly for her with the charity, but I want you to find an awesome woman to date even more.”

  He knew she did. While she didn’t push at him, he knew Amber wanted him to fall head over heels in love with a woman. Mostly because she genuinely wanted the best for him. But also because a little part of her felt guilty that she’d found the love of her life and was living happily ever after with him and their children while Derek was alone.

  “I guess we’re in the early days of actually dating, you could say. There was the kiss, and we’re going to go out again tomorrow night.”

  “That’s really great, Derek.” She smiled, but it quickly faded and she got that pinched look between her eyebrows. “So I heard she lives in some fancy high-rise in the Back Bay or someplace like that?”

  Jess sure hadn’t wasted any time running to Amber with gossip. He knew they’d become very good friends through Village Hearts but had the woman been texting her from Kincaid’s? And he couldn’t really do anything to discourage it. Not only had Jess become a very valuable asset to the charity, but she was his lieutenant’s wife.

  “Some place like that.” When the pinch turned into a frown, he knew she’d fast-forwarded right to the hard questions that didn’t need to be asked yet. Yes, it would make co-parenting a lot harder if he was that far away, and Olivia certainly wasn’t going to give up a fancy high-rise apartment to move into his not-fancy, post-divorce apartment with him. “I said early days of dating, Amber. You’re not only putting the cart before the horse, but you don’t even have a horse yet.”

  “I don’t even know what that means,” she said, and they were laughing when the kids came in with their backpacks.

  Since going out for pizza and bowling would be fun enough, they were just going to hang out at home until it was time. He’d managed to find a three-bedroom he could afford by sacrificing overall size and living with the building’s need for a remodel, and it always struck Derek as odd that it felt empty and huge when he was alone and not nearly big enough when the kids were with him.

  They’d just finished a light lunch when his son threw him a curveball.

  “Will you be the new baby’s stepdad?” Isaac asked, and Derek paused, having absolutely no idea what his son was talking about.

  “What new baby?�
� he asked at the exact same time Julia shrieked her brother’s name.

  “It’s a secret, stupid,” she hissed at him.

  “Don’t call your brother stupid,” he said automatically. But his mind was spinning.

  “Mom said not to tell anybody yet.” Julia looked at him with a serious expression. “I don’t know why they told Isaac. He never keeps secrets.”

  Amber was pregnant. He sat back in his chair, trying to process how he felt about that in the time he had before he opened his mouth. And that wouldn’t be long, since both kids were staring at him, waiting for his reaction.

  For some reason, he hadn’t even considered the possibility. After Isaac was born—and even after he was healthy and the fear was behind them—Derek and Amber had agreed that two kids were enough for them. Neither of them had gotten around to any permanent measures to make that happen, but they’d taken precautions to ensure there wouldn’t be any surprises.

  But Jason didn’t have kids of his own. They’d fallen in love and gotten married, so the next step for a lot of people was having a baby. Derek should have seen it coming, but he hadn’t. And now he had his two kiddos looking to him for his reaction.

  “A new baby is exciting,” he said finally, sidestepping Isaac’s question. He’d give Amber a heads-up that they needed to figure out how to explain the biology and legalities of the impending new dynamic in very simple terms. “Are you excited?”

  They both shrugged, but Julia did the talking. “It’ll be weird. Babies cry a lot.”

  “They’re cute, though,” Isaac mumbled. “Everybody loves babies.”

  “Everybody loves both of you, too,” Derek said, ruffling his son’s hair. “Loving a baby doesn’t mean less love for you.”

  “Will you love the new baby, too?”

  “The baby is going to be your little brother or sister, so yes, I will care about the new baby. But I will never love anybody more than I love the two of you. I promise.” They both smiled at him. “And your mom and Jason will give the baby a lot of attention because little babies need a lot of attention because they can’t do anything, but your mom loves you like crazy, too.”

  “I’m glad you don’t have a girlfriend, Daddy,” Julia said. “I don’t want you to get married and have new babies, too.”

  Ouch.

  “Can we play video games now?” Isaac asked.

  Even though he usually held out a little longer because he liked hearing about all the stuff he missed, today he nodded his approval on the first ask. He wanted out of this conversation. “For one hour, then we’ll start getting ready for bowling.”

  As he watched them powering on the video game console and arguing over who got to be player one, he thought about Amber and how the new baby was going to change everything. Especially for Julia and Isaac.

  Jason was a good guy and he genuinely loved his stepchildren, so Derek didn’t think they’d get pushed aside for his own child. It was still going to be a huge adjustment for the entire family, though, and especially for the kids.

  I’m glad you don’t have a girlfriend, Daddy.

  Obviously now wasn’t the time to bring up the subject of Daddy having a new girlfriend. He leaned his head back with a sigh and closed his eyes. If the kids were feeling insecure after the news of Amber’s pregnancy, he’d wait a while before talking to them about Olivia, he decided.

  It didn’t feel right, almost like living two separate lives. But he’d make it work for now and hope that, when the time was right, Olivia and the kids would meet and hit it off because his kids were his entire life, but he was really starting to like having Olivia in it, too.

  * * *

  The restaurant could have been burning down around them and Olivia wasn’t sure she’d be able to tear her gaze away from the man sitting across the table from her.

  For the last hour, they’d talked and laughed, taking their time with the meal. They’d had a drink first, and then picked at an appetizer before ordering their dinners. And he’d told the server they’d like a few minutes to relax before looking at the dessert menu.

  Olivia didn’t care if they stayed all night. At some point in the evening, he’d unbuttoned the cuffs of the light blue button-down shirt he was wearing and folded them back.

  She’d long ago admitted to herself she couldn’t resist the combination of heat and humor in his expression whenever they were together, but she was surprised by how much the sight of his hands and the tanned skin of his forearms against the pale fabric turned her on. His hands were rough and callused, and he’d recently scraped a couple of knuckles on something. And all she could think about right now was how much she wanted those hands on her.

  “Tell me how you got your scar,” she said, trying to distract herself. “I mean, if you don’t mind. If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay. I was just curious.”

  “I don’t mind talking about it, but you’ll probably be disappointed. Most people expect it to be from some kind of line-of-duty act of heroism.”

  “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t make that assumption. Not that it was an act of heroism, necessarily, but that you got hurt while working.”

  “When I was twelve, I was helping my dad lay new sheathing and shingles on our roof and I slipped. I managed not to fall off, but I caught the edge of the nail I’d been pounding on the way down to the edge.”

  She winced, trying not to imagine what that had looked—or felt—like. Especially when it was so pronounced this many years later. Of course, he didn’t strike her as the kind of guy who was big on creams and sunscreens. “Ouch.”

  “It was the first time I ever swore in front of my mother.”

  “I bet she didn’t mind.”

  He laughed. “I don’t think she even heard me. She was too busy yelling those same words at my old man for having me up there in the first place.”

  “I gather she’d told him so?”

  He grinned. “Oh, she’d definitely told him so.”

  “Did you grow up here?”

  “On the north shore. My parents still live there, and I have a brother and a sister. Both younger and, trust me, they were never allowed on the roof.”

  She laughed, wondering what it was like to have siblings. Being an only child was not only lonely at times, but she didn’t have anybody to split her parents’ focus with. There was no hey, look what my sister’s doing when it got too hot under the magnifying glass.

  “What about your family?” he asked. “Other than in Virginia and no longer married to each other, of course. Are you still close? Siblings?”

  While she was curious about his family, hers was probably the last thing she wanted to talk about tonight. “It’s just me. And I’m fairly close with both of them, I guess. Separately. I talk to them on a regular basis. My dad remarried, to a woman who had three kids from a previous marriage. All younger than me and I was already away at college, so I know them, but we’re not close. And did I see strawberry shortcake on that dessert menu?”

  She could see he noticed the deliberate subject change, and was thankful when he let it go. “You did, and it’s delicious. They make the biscuits themselves. And the whipped cream.”

  “I shouldn’t. I really shouldn’t.”

  “Then I will, and you can sneak as many bites as you want.”

  They ate it slowly, as if they had an unspoken agreement to stretch it out as long as possible. But when she put down her fork because the ice cream had melted and joined forces with the strawberries to turn the last of the biscuit into mush, Derek pushed the plate to one side.

  “After-dessert coffee?” he asked her as the server approached.

  She groaned at the idea of putting anything else in her stomach, but she didn’t want to leave, either. “One. But decaf.”

  Once the dessert plates were cleared and they’d fixed their coffees, Derek leaned for
ward. He rested his forearms on the table when he did it, which brought her attention right back to them. “I’m out of ways to keep you here, so don’t be surprised if it takes me a really long time to drink this.”

  “Me, too. Baby sips.” And unable to resist the urge anymore, she reached out and stroked his arm, from his wrist to the edge of the rolled-up cuff.

  “This probably sounds weird, but you have really great arms and I’ve wanted to do that all night.”

  “Trust me, you’re welcome to touch any part of my body you want.”

  “That would be a scandal this restaurant would never forget.”

  She watched the words sink in—the admission she wanted to touch him in places she couldn’t touch him in public—and for a moment his expression was so intense, she thought he might haul her across the table and onto his lap.

  “You’re worth the risk of being on the eleven o’clock news for.”

  It was the weirdest and yet most romantic thing a man had ever said to her, and Olivia shivered. “I bet handcuffs are a lot sexier in theory.”

  “And there’s a good chance I’d know the officers responding and never hear the end of it.” The muscles in his forearm twitched under her trailing touch. “I’m on tomorrow, so it’s an early alarm for a twenty-four-hour shift.”

  “I have an eight-o’clock meeting in the Seaport.” She didn’t even want to think about what time she’d have to get up in order to leave this part of the city in time to make it home, shower and get dressed, and make the meeting by eight. Dark o’clock, and in the height of summer, that was saying something.

  “We can make this happen.” He pulled out his phone. “I don’t have the kids next weekend. Amber’s hosting a couple of Village Hearts kids for a few days and they’ll be there through the weekend. Since they don’t have school, I’ll just grab Julia and Isaac Wednesday morning and bring them home Thursday night instead.”

  Olivia wanted to ask how that worked—if he’d have to fight his ex to change up the schedule—because he didn’t seem to get that tenseness in his voice when speaking of his ex that her parents and almost everybody else she knew did. But she didn’t want to interrupt where this conversation was heading by discussing his failed marriage.