Tenacity (Rise of the Iliri Book 5)

by Auryn Hadley

  "He's not, but it makes for a nice disguise. " She glanced over. "Kolt take it off. " Then back. "You know I'm mated to a former human."

  "Zep. We know. He is cessivi, so it is not the same." The girl turned to Kolt and inhaled. "So who are you and why are you with the Kaisae?"

  "Someone has to watch her back." He refused to drop his eyes even as he untied the necklace. "It seems to be my job in life."

  She inhaled, her eyes tracking the scent. "Yet you refuse to submit to her?"

  He shoved the necklace into his pocket. "We're working it out, and it's none of your business."

  But that was the wrong answer. "The Kaisae is my business, you idiot."

  Kolt crossed his arms over his chest. "Then we may have a problem after all. I kinda found her first."

  "He did," Sal said, stopping the argument before it could escalate. "I need to get to Issevi, and I need a way to reach my family near Idiptu Gap."

  Zensa slowly pulled in a breath, turning stiffly away from Kolt. "We have links, but we've found how to hide them from Terran mutts. You can't use them unless you've been invited."

  Sal's eyes widened in surprise. "Impressive. Would someone be willing to show me how?"

  "Yes, I would be happy to."

  The iliri girl just offered her hand. When they touched, an entire network suddenly appeared to Sal's senses. A split second later, a surge of excitement flared back to her from the other linkers along the hub. I just need a boost, Sal thought to them before reaching for Jase.

  Sal? he asked, feeling her.

  A split second later, Zep joined. Sal! Oh, demon, you're ok?

  I'm fine, she assured him. I'm with Kolton, from Star Fall. He broke his cover to get me out.

  But her mates could feel her emotions. We know, Jase thought. But are ya ok?

  I will be. She felt her throat pinch, glad she didn't have to speak to talk to them. I didn't understand how much it hurts. Not just missing him, but losing him. Please tell me the rest of the Blades are ok?

  They are, Zep promised. The nuvani helped Arctic's group, and our prisoner took care of us. We all made it through.

  Did we kill anyone?

  No one we didn't mean to, he answered. Sal, you did good. You kept your wits instead of sending us into a fit, and you probably saved a lot of lives.

  She glanced back to Kolt, then over to Zensa, looking to see if they'd heard. Zensa was nodding. I did? she asked her mates. I was just trying to keep him alive.

  And na tear down the world, Jase added. Ya may na have planned it, kitten, but ya did na want ta hurt those who had na hurt ya, and it mattered.

  That's a good thing, kid, Zep thought. Because it sounds like Arctic was in the middle of five Viraenovan units, and Shade almost lost it.

  She burns, Sal remembered. But she made it through, too?

  Ever' one did, Jase said. Now we just need ya back. Where are ya?

  Little town on the wrong side of the mountains. I just have to figure out how to get across them.

  The 112th is moving your way from the CFC. This from Zep. They're taking that goat path on the border and heading up the foothills. When Rragri notified Pig, he asked Rais to help. The passes were blocked. Terric has the Siahies.

  Sal's reply was nothing but the feeling of shock and confusion.

  Zep kept going. Being spread apart when the link broke, we managed to get a general location, and Rais didn't wait for permission, he just headed out. Devil Dogs are organizing the maargra and pressing the line to get them through.

  So head south, Jase told her. From where ya are, they can get ya into Issevi in two ta three days. Arctic put them in a link and an aufrio male declared himself of their pack.

  Sal pressed a hand to her mouth. Brerror, right?

  Jase paused. Yeh, how'd ya know?

  Kolt is too, but I'm making him a Blade.

  He'd better not get any ideas, Zep grumbled.

  Doesn't seem like it. Sal glanced at Kolt. He's trying, but he's as proud as I am.

  Then I'll kick his ass a few times. I taught Geo his place, I can show a fucking loaner. Zep's resolve was leaking through.

  He saved my life, she reminded them.

  Zep wasn't willing to relent. He owed you. You kept him from getting killed the last time we had to deal with these mountains.

  Na quite, Jase corrected. She owed him first, and more.

  I'll explain when I get home, Sal promised. For now, I just need you both to get to Issevi.

  Jase had more to share. Kitten, we have an ally in the Black Widows now. Man named Marin.

  And you're sure he's on our side?

  Positive.

  He took care of us when the link broke, Zep added.

  Ok, Sal thought. The Emperor's son is also willing to help. He's linked directly to my mind.

  She could feel Jase explaining to Zep what her words meant. Emotions flashed too fast for her to identify all of them.

  The Emperor is really iliri? Zep bellowed.

  Sal nodded, glancing at the rebel beside her, knowing the girl was listening in. Was. He's as mute as a human, now. Zep, he's more human than you are. I stripped him clean. It's why they killed Blaec.

  Ah, fuck. Zep couldn't hide the pain her words caused - or the concern. Aw, demon, you ok?

  Not really, but he was the Lieutenant to the end. He told me if I caused the Emperor enough pain, it was the only chance of his survival. She sighed. He lied, Zep. His last words to me were a lie to save our people. I love him for his sacrifice, but it only makes his loss hurt more.

  Damn you, LT. Zep paused, and Sal thought he was trying to halt his tears. That's why he was the leader. He gave everything to the cause.

  She interrupted his thoughts. I won't. Confusion hit her, not only from her cessivi but also from the linkers listening in. I will not have my hand forced by ayati or anyone else. I will not be a slave again, not even the world's. Not even our species. I can't take another loss.

  Then we will na, Jase said to those listening. Over and over, we have been willing ta die ta save our people. Maybe this time, we need ta live instead.

  Yeah. She closed her eyes and nodded. I don't want any more iliri to die because of me. For the first time, we have that chance, and I want to make sure we all get to enjoy it.

  Sal? Zep asked.

  Yeah?

  Then come home to me? Just take care of yourself and come home to me? I don't care what you do between now and then, but I need to see you one more time, demon.

  We can na live without ya, Jase thought.

  I promise. Kolt's helping, and I'm going to get there. Make sure the rest know their Kaisae is coming home.

  With that, she released their connection. Thanking the linkers, she let go, closing her eyes against the hollowness in her head. Talking to them helped, but it also hurt. She wasn't meant to be alone. For more than a year and a half, almost two years now, she'd had the luxury of a pack with her, and she couldn't imagine trying to live without them. Her eyes turned to Kolt, well aware that's exactly what he'd had to do.

  "The 112th is heading up from Escea," she told him. "We get a night here, then we have to head south."

  His eyes flicked to the girl still standing in the room. "And you want me to come with you?"

  "Yeah."

  "Then that's what I'll do." Lifting his chin, he looked at Zensa. "She's going to need to sleep and a meal before we leave. A bath would be great, but we're short on funds."

  "She's the Kaisae," Zensa reminded him. "The room is a gift. It comes with the rest, but our only bathing facilities are communal."

  "Good, because I'm not leaving her side."

  Sal chuckled, waving off her loyal protector. "It's ok, Kolt. Zensa's on our side, remember?"

  He turned his eyes to her. "The only people I trust right now, babe, are your cessivi. Swore I'd get you back in one piece, and this time I'm gonna make sure it happens. Be pissed at me if you want, but until then, I'm the one calling the shots."

&
nbsp; She nodded, doing her best to keep from smiling. "Right." Then she looked over to Zensa. "Forgive my brother. He's a little sensitive about these things. I appreciate all the help you've already given."

  "It's our pleasure, Kaisae, and he's fine. I'm impressed with his loyalty, not offended by it." She gestured to the one pack laying on the far side of the room. "That doesn't look like much. If you'd like, I can find a pair of black shirts for you and a change of clothes while what you have is washed. Just leave your things in the bath, and we'll take care of the rest."

  "Thank you," Sal said. The idea of a bath sounded blissful after the hell she'd been through.

  Zensa dropped her eyes and stepped back. "Then, when you are ready, just head down the stairs and turn left. The first door is the bathing room. We will make sure it's clear." Her hand found the door, but she paused. "And you are safe in that form while inside the inn. No one here will betray our Kaisae."

  "Thank you," Sal said again, and the girl left.

  Kolt huffed as soon as the door was closed. "Arrogant bitch."

  Sal couldn't help herself; she chuckled. "I think she likes you."

  "Well sucks to be her. I'm a little too busy to think about whoring right now."

  Slowly, Sal's head tilted and her eyes narrowed. "I can take a bath on my own, you know."

  "No," he grumbled, storming over to their packs to pull out the washing. "If you want me to stand at the door with my back to you, then fine, but I'm not going to take the chance of someone getting their hands on you."

  "It's fine," she promised. "Kinda got used to communal bathing back in the CFC. I just thought you might need a little time to get to know Zensa."

  He growled in the back of his throat. "No."

  "Kolt," she tried, but he cut her off.

  "I'm not leaving you," he insisted. "I did that once and spent the last seven years hating myself for it." Then he looked up, meeting her eyes. "Just give me this, ok?"

  "Ok." She crossed the room and rested her hand on his shoulder. "Thank you. It matters. Now, c'mon. I'm tired of smelling like death."

  Chapter 36

  At the base of the stairs, a man gestured to a door. Kolt opened it, stepping through first and held it for Sal. Four large tubs sat in the room, but only two were filled. Steam drifted off the water. Thick towels and soft clothes had been laid out, as well as an assortment of soaps and bathing supplies. Sal sighed as if she was in heaven, peeling out of the Terran uniform before the door was latched.

  Kolt glanced away politely. "You rarely used the communal bathing chambers in the CFC."

  "I did, I just hated being watched so went very late or really early." She shrugged it away. "Humans seem to be shocked to learn I have a hairless body."

  "Shocked isn't the right word." He dropped their filthy belongings to the side, then stripped off his clothes. "Human women often shave to mimic the look."

  "That would get old." Sal climbed into the tub, casually watching as he shoved his pants to his ankles.

  "So I hear." He grinned when he caught her eyes. "This?" he ran his fingers over the soft fuzz shading his genitals. "Even the men shave to entice the women. Trim, I suppose it would be. They assumed I had a lot of interest because of my ‘careful grooming'. It made things easier."

  "So you don't have a problem finding women who appeal to you, then?" Sal laughed, slipping her head below the water to wet it.

  "Never said that. Never said I didn't, either." He claimed the tub beside her.

  "Yet you won't even answer a direct question." Sal worked her hair into a thick lather. "If I asked you how many women you've had since I left for Anglia, could you even tell me?"

  "Sure."

  She slipped under the water again, rinsing the grime away. "Would you?" she asked as she wiped the water from her eyes.

  "None." He shifted to rinse his own body, refusing to look at her.

  "Since Merriton?"

  He smiled, scrubbing at his body. "I know that number, too."

  Sal laughed and coated her hair in a conditioning cream, inhaling the pleasant scent. "And you aren't going to offer that answer either, are ya."

  "You gonna scrub my back for me?" he asked mischievously.

  She pulled herself from the tub, dripping as she took the soap from his hands. "I just want to know if living like a human has changed more than just your attitude. I'll trade. Your back for the answer."

  He leaned forward and she lathered her hands, rubbing tension from his muscles as she worked the grime from his copper skin. He shifted forward at the pressure, and she slipped in behind him, listening to Kolt moan as she worked away months of aches and pains.

  "None," he said as she worked at a hard knot.

  "That's six years."

  "Yeah, I know."

  "Your wife only died two years ago."

  He nodded. "Last time I touched her was when she got pregnant with Las. He was born about four months after you and I met."

  "And for all the attitude, you've been with no one?" Sal's hands paused as she tried to wrap her mind around what he was saying. "So it's not just the Blades."

  "What about you?" Kolt asked.

  She forced her hands back into motion. "Depends on how you count."

  "Lovers, not assassinations."

  She huffed what was supposed to be a laugh. "So you were at my trial, huh?"

  "When I could be, yeah. Nice job on the Baron, by the way. I'd wondered if you were a shifter."

  "He was a really bad lay, but sex is a good tool for killing them."

  "Lovers, Sal. How many?"

  "Three."

  "Since Merriton?"

  She nodded. "Since I got free. Blaec was the first man I ever chose. I found Jase because of the maast, but it built from there." She laughed softly. "Zep? He kept saying no. Jase had to convince him to say yes because I was already in his bed."

  "Because of the attack in Myrosica?"

  "Yeah. Pig had no problem with me sleeping in his unit. Told his men to watch our backs. I'd just convinced Zep that it really was ok to touch me when they tried again."

  "And I guess he got you in maast after that?"

  "Yeah, but I didn't hurt him. I kinda tried to attack him, but I showed him how to stop me, and he trusted me. Still can't understand why it doesn't bother him when I'm covered in human blood."

  "Because he loves you."

  She flipped her hair over her shoulder and tapped his. "My turn."

  "Gladly." He lathered her back, then his fingers began tracing the white lines etched into her skin. "Did I even make a line on your body?"

  Sal stood and rested her hip against the lip of the tub then pointed to a spot high on her inner thigh. Pale purple grew more vivid until the iliran words changed to blue. He reached up and rested his hand against the outside of her leg, reading the words she'd chosen.

  "Who tattooed this?"

  "Risk."

  "Who designed the words? That's not common Iliran."

  "Jase."

  Kolt nodded, his hand tracing the largest line, and he read the words aloud. "For one night the pain ended, and hope came to me. He swore there was more and showed me how it could be mine, making promises that I struggled to believe. The words of my safety, spoken on the lips of a man who dared to care about me. Those words mattered. They gave me control of my destiny and taught me that there is always a reason to keep fighting."

  She pointed to a line that spiraled away from the main thought. "Read that."

  "It was the first time I had ever felt what it must be like to know love, laying in the gentleness of his hands." He shook his head. "I did that?"

  "Yeah." She turned and sank back into the warm water. "What do you know about Iliran tattoos?"

  "Enough to know why you put it there." His hands returned to her back, massaging her gently. "You're trying to say that I'm the reason you can still lay with a man, am I right?"

  She nodded. "Jase designed it all. I didn't tell him what to write, he just rea
d me and made the design. It took hours to ink it all on. He started on one leg and passed it to Risk, designing the next while I was tattooed. We were racing time, knowing they were about to disband the Blades."

  "I thought you had that in Anglia."

  She shook her head. "And now you know you can read all of my secrets. I keep none to myself."

  "I'm trying, but I'm not brave enough to share my own story, since so little of it is mine to tell." He traced a red symbol on her lower back. "What's this?"

  "The maast, and its control over my life."

  "Do you hate it?"

  "No," Sal assured him. "I love it, but I love it like an addict loves a fix. I always need just one more time. Just one more kill, and while it feels amazing, I hate that I'm powerless against it."

  "Yeah," he said softly. "I know what you mean."

  She looked over her shoulder to find him staring at the lines on her back. "You don't get the maast."

  "Go to your own tub and rinse," he said, forcing a smile.

  She shrugged and did just that, lowering herself below the water to work her hair clean. There was only one way his words made sense. When she realized it, her head broke the surface with a gasp. "Kolt?"

  "Don't ask that," he said, meeting her eyes. "I'd like to keep a bit of my pride, If you don't mind."

  She nodded, understanding how her own arrogance had driven her. He was pulled even harder by his and she'd almost asked him to give up more secrets than he wanted. She knew he wouldn't lie to her. She wasn't sure he could.

  "Make me a deal?" she asked.

  "Maybe."

  "If I push too hard, will you tell me before you resent it?"

  He smiled and propped his feet on the edge of the tub, leaning back. "Yeah, babe, that I can promise. Anyone who can think of me like you do, I won't resent. I just hope the reality can stand up to the ideal you've created."

  "It has so far." She stood and grabbed one of the soft towels. "It's nice to be clean, you know?"

  "And before the water is even cold," he groaned, splashing out of his own tub. "I like the setup, though. Bet you need a larger tub for both of your men."

  She laughed. "No. Bathing with the two of them would be dangerous. I usually shared my baths with Rayna."