Cry For You_A Second Chance Romance

by Shaniel Watson

  “We should. God knows most of our husbands wouldn’t know the first thing to do if one of us was out of commission for a day. Everything would fall apart, including the kids.” They all laugh, looking at each other with knowing grins.

  I feel awkward and out of place, being the unknown girlfriend, listening to them talk about how great a husband he is to his wife. “You know, Mrs. Pear, I don’t think I’ll be able to join the PTA with my work schedule. I would be happy to donate anything else, if I can. If you’ll excuse me, I have to go. It was nice meeting you all, bye,” I say, waving with the best smile I can manage without looking at Landon, trying not to be too rude.

  “Lace!”

  “What is it?” I turn around to deal with this new set of developments I haven’t had time to process yet.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Hi, Landon!” Jacob waves excitedly through the window. So excited, he’s trying to unbuckle his seat belt. I tell him not to, and his bottom lip pokes out.

  “Hey, buddy. I’m sorry about this weekend. I’ll make it up to you. Anything you want, okay?”

  “Okay.” He smiles, as trusting as ever.

  Which pisses me off, after what Jackson filled me in on about his weekend trip, and the praise-for-Bree’s-husband group. I move away from the jeep enough so Jacob won’t hear us. “Don’t make promises to my child you can’t keep.”

  “What?” he stares stunned.

  “You just stood there. Why didn’t you correct them? Tell them you and Bree were not together anymore, but you’re helping her take care of Jackson. Nothing else. You’re supposed to be getting a divorce.”

  “It wasn’t the time or the place to do that.”

  “When would be the time? When would be the time to let people know I’m not your mistress…a homewrecker!” I huff.

  I look over his shoulder, and there she is, sitting in his truck with Jackson, and the other women have found their way over to them, laughing and talking. She’s one of them. Part of the group I won’t be a part of because he is Bree’s, in their minds, not mine. And that pisses me off to the point I’m breathing hard.

  “It would be the perfect time when she’s there in front of people to confirm it, Landon. In front of your son, because he believes you’re getting back together.”

  “Things are a little confused at the moment, but he knows I’m with you. His mother and I are not together.”

  “How the hell would he know?” I throw my hands up. “If you’re living at home as a happily married couple? How would he know, if you’re going to anniversary dinners for her parents, and you’re not telling people you’re getting divorced? A fucking weekend family reunion?” I was on an angry rant I couldn’t stop. “You should have told me. Jackson told me; he was very happy with the turn of events.”

  “Lace.” He reaches for my hand.

  “No,” I say, moving out of reach. “Your wife and your fan club are waiting for you to play the part of the devoted husband. It wouldn’t be the right time to let them down.” I turn, forcefully closing the door, driving off in a blaze of anger.

  Worried, Jacob’s little face looks at me through the rearview mirror. Now don’t I feel like the shitty parent?

  “Mom, are you okay?”

  “Fine. It’s just grown-up stuff. Don’t worry, okay?” I take my phone off the front seat, handing it to him. He loves to play with my phone, and it’ll provide him with a distraction. He happily takes it. “Play a game. Everything’s fine.”

  How I wish that was the truth. Three days later, I’ve dodged all of Landon’s calls. Every doubt I’ve ever had about us has steamrolled over me. Maybe my mother was right—this was too much, too fast. So much to think about. If I end this now, it’s not only me that’ll be hurt. There’s Jacob. He hasn’t said it, but I know he had his heart set on Landon being in his life, playing an even bigger part than just his best friend’s dad, hanging with him from time to time.

  If this ends, what about him? How the hell am I going to end this thing? The rekindling of something that was once so amazing, before it was ruined. Finding it again, and having it still be as amazing, but complicated, wanting it just as bad, not just for myself but for my son. How would I begin to end it? Could I even?

  Sam, I’m going on break.”

  “Are you all right? The past few days you seem distracted. You want to talk about something?”

  I place my pad on the counter and wipe my hand on my apron. The last thing I want is to be distracted at work, having people worried about me. “Thanks, Sam, I’m just going through a rough patch. I’ll pull it together soon. I’m sorry if it’s affecting my work. I won’t let it happen anymore.”

  “You’re great at your job. I’m worried about you. If you need to talk, let me know.”

  “I will. Thanks for not yelling at me when I screwed up those orders yesterday and today. It won’t happen again.”

  “If anyone screamed at you in front of me, I’d rip them a new asshole, including myself.” He smiles.

  I laugh. “That would be something to see.”

  “Get on your break and take as long as you need. Looks like you might need it. Your guy’s out there, waiting on you.”

  I take a deep breath but don’t turn. I knew he would eventually come. “How long has he been there?”

  “About an hour. I figured he was the cause of your distractions. Give him hell for that. If you don’t come back in here with a smile, he’s going to have a pretty new asshole.”

  “Oh, Sam.” I can’t help but laugh, through the sadness and uncertainty of what to do about our multifaceted, situation.

  Outside, he’s standing tall and handsome as always. It all comes to me. The boy I fell in love with many years ago. The man he is today, who is kind, an amazing father to a little boy he truly adores, as I do mine. He will always be my idea of what I want in a man and relationship.

  I know he’s all those things, because of the way he is with me and our children, but most of all, I’ve seen it with Bree. That’s what scares me the most. He has a wife, and I see and hear with my own eyes, there is something there with the woman that’s still his wife, as much as he denies it, and I’m afraid of what that is.

  “Hi,” he says, pushing off the car. “You’re avoiding me.” His voice is low and deep, eyes on me every step I take.

  “Not avoiding. I needed space. You spent a weekend with your—Bree. A family weekend, Landon. I said I would give this a try...I don’t know if this is going to work.” I cross my arms, looking away from his intense stare, waiting for him to say something, anything.

  It’s like he’s trying to figure me out, examine me without words or questions. God, I hate the way that makes me feel, insecure and unsure. What the hell? “Did I get it wrong? Were you not on a romantic family weekend with your wife and son?” Nothing, and I’m more upset now than I have been in the past three days. “Tell me I’m wrong?” I snap.

  His nostrils flare. He moves closer, towering over me. My breath catches, and I flinch. Purely reflex, because in my heart I know he would never hurt me physically. In that alone, I can put my trust.

  There is a flash of regret across his face, and in the same instant his body posture changes, and he raises his hands up, palms facing me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I would never…”

  “I know.”

  “No, you don’t. If you knew, you would also know I wouldn’t hurt you in any other way. There was no romantic weekend, Lace. Why would you think I would do that?”

  “You did. Tell me what Jackson said wasn’t true, and I’ll drop this.”

  “Kids see things differently, Lace. You know this. Especially a kid who wants his parents back together more than anything.”

  “I am so glad you said that. Because you’ve been in denial about it, instead of dealing with it. It’s making things worse instead of better.”

  “I’ve been dealing with it. What would you have me do? How am I supposed to make this transition
better for everyone? I’ve been doing my best.” He raises his voice.

  Dammit, your best would be for you to move out of the fucking house you share with your wife. Your best would be for Jackson to see this divorce is going to happen, and Bree could see you are really moving on. Not half of you in one place and half in another, giving them hope. Giving me doubts if I made the right choice about us.

  But I don’t say that, because these are things best realized by him. They just won’t seem the same coming from me. From me, it would seem more like I’m jealous and drawing a wedge between him and his son, which is the last thing I would ever do.

  “Sometimes our best isn’t good enough, Landon.” Sometimes we need to go that extra mile and try harder for the ones we love. “It goes for me, too. My best is to protect my heart, and most of all, to protect my son from a broken one, from a string of broken promises, from feeling second best.”

  “I didn’t tell you the entire truth because I knew it would upset you. I wasn’t going to spend the entire weekend, but after the anniversary party, Bree started crying. She didn’t want to tell her family at the family reunion that her marriage was ending, or at a celebration of long-lasting happiness for her parents. And Jackson was so happy. I wanted him to have a weekend when he wasn’t worried about his parents. He could be happy with his cousins, whose parents weren’t headed for divorce.

  “I couldn’t disappoint him. They are my family, but so are you and Jacob. I want to make you both happy, but I want to make you happy in a different way. Lacey, with you everything is different; you’re a part of my future. You’re my now. I know I’m fucking up. I promise I’ll figure it out.”

  “Before we can move on and go any further, you need to figure it out. You need to make a choice. Before we invest any more of ourselves, and the damage is so great there is no coming back. We’ve been down that road; I don’t intend on going back again for anyone. Our future now, or the past you had that you can’t seem to let go?” In simple terms, me or Bree.

  An eternity seemed to slip by as we stood in the parking lot staring at each other, and I waited for an answer. My heart screaming choose me but my mind, ever the pessimist and sometimes to undoing, said it won’t be you. You’re still not worth it.

  Bzzz. Bzzz.

  Not taking my eyes off him I reach for my phone in my pocket. “Hello.” The voice on the other end is a lady telling me it’s Jacob’s school, and he was in a fight he started with two other students. Jacob doesn’t fight! Seeing my face, Landon comes closer, putting his hand on my arm.

  I turn the phone off, and he says, “What’s wrong?”

  I sigh, dropping the phone in my pocket. “They said Jacob was in a fight at school. I need to go.”

  “Let me take you,” he says, pulling me closer.

  “Not a good idea. I’m all over the place with you right now. I need to focus on Jacob. It’s not like him to get into a fight. To start one…he’s the most non-confrontational kid I know.” I chew on my lip trying to figure out why he would be fighting. “I need to tell Sam I have an emergency. I need to leave.”

  “Don’t worry too much while you’re driving. I’m sure it’s a misunderstanding. Jacob doesn’t seem like the fighting type to me. I’ll call you later,” he says, watching me run back inside.

  Expelling a frustrated breath, I walk in the office. The first thing that registers is shock when my eyes hit on two women sitting in the central area, one of them being Bree, with her crutches.

  What is she doing here?

  She takes one look at me, eyes pulling together, lips tightening, and looks straight past me as if I’m not in the room. Seems like the offer of hanging out and being besties has been swiped clear off the table.

  The uncomfortable thought hits me. Was Jackson one of the kids Jacob had a fight with? I sincerely hope not. That’s his best friend. I pick the farthest seat away from Bree and the woman who I’m guessing is the other student’s mother, sitting stone-faced.

  I can’t believe Jacob was in a fight. Jacob never fights; he’s the kid who would back down from a physical fight. Something bad must have happened to upset him to the point he felt like he had to hit another child. I’m still skeptical about him and Jackson fighting. They’ve been having their issues lately, but I can’t imagine either one of them fighting each other.

  I’m busy chewing off my lip with worry when Landon walks through the door. You don’t know how relieved I am to see him. My stress level instantly goes down with relief, until I stand up, and so does Bree, fumbling with her crutches.

  His eyes shift back and forth, contemplating what to do. “Hey,” he says to no one in particular, while Bree and I stand still in a crucial game of Who Will He Choose?

  “The parents of Jackson, Garrett, and Jacob?”

  “Yes,” the four of us say.

  “Good afternoon, I’m Principal Kramer. Please step into my office.”

  Being closest to the door, I walk in first, and sit in the chair closest to the wall. I’ve never been called to the principal’s office, the entire time I attended school. I would never think I would be here for Jacob. Can’t say it makes me feel less anxious because I’m an adult. If anything, it’s more nerve-wracking when it’s your kid, who never gets in trouble or loses his temper, especially with his best friend.

  I notice Garrett’s mother sits on the other chair next to the wall, unfortunately leaving one chair in the middle next to me.

  Helping her with her crutches, Landon says, “Go ahead and sit down, Bree. I’ll stand.”

  “Mr…?” The principal holds his hand out to Landon.

  “Jessup.” Landon shakes his hand.

  “Jackson’s father, and this must be your wife?” He extends a hand to Bree.

  “Yes, I’m Mrs. Jessup, and Jackson is our son,” she says, loud, clear, and confident.

  I shake my head, hating that word “wife” a little more each time it’s directed at her.

  “I can bring in an extra chair?” the principal says to Landon.

  “No thanks, I can stand. I’m anxious to know what this is about.”

  “As am I.” He extends his hand, first to me, and then the other parent, before he sits behind his desk. Hands folded, stern features set in place, as if he’s ready to give a scolding.

  I feel the nervousness building from his look and being in this small room with these other people. As Principal Kramer speaks, I don’t look over my shoulder, but I know Landon’s eyes are glued to me. For the first time since we’ve been together, I don’t know how that makes me feel. He hardly acknowledged me. Not able to help myself I turn my head against my will and yes, he’s staring at me, giving me a faint smile I hardly return turning away. Depending on how this situation plays out, things are probably going to change.

  “As you were told, your boys are all fine. But they were in a fight today during art class which left them, the class, and the art teacher covered in blue paint. We are still in the process of figuring out what exactly happened and how this altercation between the boys started. I hoped to figure it out with your help, so proper disciplinary actions can be taken.”

  “What type of disciplinary actions? My son would never start a fight—he must have been provoked,” the other parent says.

  “Mrs. Drake, as you should know, we have a no-fight policy at this school. We will take necessary precautions to try to make sure this doesn’t happen again. Part of that is figuring out what triggered the altercation between the boys without laying blame before we get all the needed information.”

  “Mr. Kramer, Jackson isn’t a fighter. He’s never been in a physical fight with another child or anyone,” Bree says, then looks at me like I’m at fault.

  She’s got some nerve if she’s implying Jacob is at fault. “Jacob’s not a fighter either.” I look back at her. “He’s the least likely child I know who would end up in a fight in school.”

  “From what I gathered, Garrett says Jacob is the one who started it, by throwin
g paint on his and Jackson’s shirt, and then Jacob hit him.”

  “Are you sure about that?” I say with doubt. “My son isn’t a hitter, and Jackson is his best friend, he wouldn’t do that.”

  “Are you calling my son a liar?” Garrett’s mother says.

  “I didn’t say that. I know my son. He’s not a hitter.”

  “Are you sure about that?” Bree snidely says.

  Swallowing my response, I ignore her. Landon puts his hand on her shoulder, saying her name in a warning tone. His hand on her shoulder twists something inside me which feels a lot like jealousy. His hand shouldn’t be there. I don’t want to see him touch her in any way.

  “This is why I need to have a talk together with you and the boys to get to the bottom of this. Mr. and Mrs. Jessup, your son has not said a word. He refuses to say what happened, but according to the teacher, she saw him in the middle of the fight.”

  “See, my son looks like he was the victim here. Not the aggressor,” Garret’s mother says.

  Landon clears his throat. “I’ve seen your son on a few occasions being aggressive on the playground to the point he had to be given a stern warning by the teacher. Let’s wait, Mrs. Drake, before we throw blame around.”

  Her lips pull together as tight as leather boot straps as she rolls her eyes at Landon. Principal Kramer presses a button, asking for the boys to be sent in. Tension-filled minutes later the boys file in and immediately come to their parents with relieved looks on their little faces.

  Mrs. Drake is the first to speak when she sees her son’s face. “Oh my God! Look at his face! Well, Mr. Kramer, we better get to the bottom of this because I won’t stand for my child being beaten. Look at what they did to him. It’s obvious to anyone who sees Garrett’s face that he was the only one harmed. He couldn’t have started this.” She huffs angrily, cradling him on her lap like a baby.

  “Jacob, honey, what happened,” I ask him, brushing back his hair. “You can tell me the truth. I won’t be angry. Promise.”

  The poor thing looks so intimidated that it pricks my heart. With him in front of me, and his demeanor, I know he didn’t start this. But I ask, wanting him to say it so they can all hear, because it seems the majority of the blame is being levelled at him, and hell if I’m going to let that happen.