15 Years Later: Wasteland

by Nick S. Thomas

  “Here, they have been cleaned and patched as best we could,” said Sasha.

  She handed him his clothes all neatly folded. They both left to let him get changed. He winced as he pulled on the clothes. It didn’t hurt half as bad as he remembered when he was on the cross, but he knew it wouldn’t be gone anytime soon. Eventually, he stepped out into the light of day to see he had been staying in one of the holiday shacks. Someone must have given it up for him, and he made a mental note that he had to thank them for that.

  He couldn’t remember the last time he had slept on a bed, and his back was glad of it. A few townspeople walked past and said hello politely, as if he had been one of them all along.

  “He’s awake!” yelled someone in the distance.

  People all about the town began to gather as he walked out into the centre where Lannie and Sasha awaited him. It seemed to good to be true.

  “Why did you do it? I didn’t find your son there. I’m sorry. Why did you come for me?” he asked Lannie.

  “Because you did it for her, a selfless act. People like you are too few and far between. Folks in this town didn’t know what your agenda was, what you wanted from them. They didn’t know if they could trust you or depend on you. But you gave your life to save Sasha. That meant a lot.”

  “Thanks, but you know what this means, right? Jay will come for you. He will come for you all!”

  “And we’ll fight, just as we should have done before when you said it. We were wrong not to trust you then. Jay will never stop terrorising us, so we are drawing a line in the sand, here and now.”

  Zed saw his brother standing up on the wall with a face of stone. He was the one among all of them who didn’t believe in his ideals. He seemingly wanted no part in what they were doing, and yet he had still come to his rescue. He didn’t understand his brother at all. He seemed to hate and love him in equal measure.

  “We have been preparing the defences. We have got what weapons we can. We are ready for Jay,” said Lannie.

  She seemed to have usurped his brother as the leader of the town. Her confidence was appealing, but he couldn’t help but wonder what she would say and do if she knew the truth of what he and Johnnie did.

  “So what do you say? Will you fight with us?”

  He could hardly say no. Rave stepped forward with his rifle and sword and offered them out to him. He took them gladly. They were like solid gold to him, some of the only things with sentimental value he had left. That got him thinking. He had lost his bag with hip flask, but he reached into his pocket to try and find his photos. They were not there.

  “I think you’re looking for these,” said Lannie, passing the faded and crumbled photos to him.

  It almost made him cry to get them back, and he couldn’t even find the words to thank her. The crowd was silent now as they waited for him to speak. He didn’t know what to say until he looked at the photos, and they provided him with inspiration.

  “Some things are worth fighting for. Some things are worth dying for, and there is more to life than just surviving. I didn’t know what I would find when I came looking for the people in these photos,” he said, holding them up, “None of you owe me anything, and I am sorry for any hardship that I might have brought you. But if you will have me, I will fight for this town. I will fight with everything I have.”

  Lannie turned her attention to Rave.

  “You know Jay, what will he do now?”

  “He will gather every vehicle and Brave he can, and he will come for you. He will come to destroy you.”

  That was no surprise to Zed, but to many of the townspeople it was a horrifying thought. Somehow they had managed to get by all these years, and now they seemed to be facing the threat of complete annihilation.

  “How long until he comes?”

  “It will take him a few more days to get everything ready. He underestimated you last time. He won’t this time.”

  “You are one of us, aren’t you?”

  She nodded in agreement.

  “I wish we had the time to celebrate, but we don’t. There is work to do. You all know what you have to do. Let’s get moving!”

  They separated and went about it. Zed could see the gates had already been repaired and reinforced. The dump truck Rave had stolen lay parked behind it to strengthen against ramming, and large shackles fixed the gate to the side of the vehicle, too.

  They really have been busy.

  He felt hands on his shoulders. He turned to see Sasha in front of him. She kissed him and then held him tight.

  “I love you,” she whispered in his ear.

  That meant a lot to him. He pulled her back slightly and kissed her.

  “I can’t believe you came for me,” she said, weeping tears of joy.

  “None of us have got much in these days, so we have to fight for what we do have.”

  She nodded in agreement.

  “I am sorry you lost your wife, I really am. But I hope you can learn to love me still.”

  He smiled and put his hand against her warm face. He couldn’t believe his luck.

  “I have to get on. I have things to do. I will see you later,” she said as she skipped off excitedly and looked back at him with a smile.

  But it was Johnnie who he turned his attention to. He strolled up onto the walls to find his brother on guard, looking out into the distance with his rifle propped against the wall beside him.

  “Why d’you do it? Why’d you come for me?” Zed asked.

  He sighed and took in a deep breath before answering. He didn’t seem to want to, but Zed waited until he did.

  “Because brothers don’t let each other die. Not even when you were at your worst could you kill me.”

  “Still not exactly happy I am here, though, right?”

  “I already told you. You can never make up for all the wrong you have done.”

  Zed knew that was true, too, and he wasn’t going to argue it.

  “I wish you’d never come back.”

  “And I wish I’d never left,” he replied.

  “And now you want to lead these people?”

  “Not really. All I wanted was my family and my friends back.”

  “You never would have lost them if you hadn’t been such an asshole in the first place.”

  “I get that.”

  “And now you have Lannie on side, too. But she doesn’t know what you really are, does she?” he said and turned to look Zed in the eye.

  He shook his head, and he was starting to realise he needed to tell her. Johnnie wasn’t going to force the issue. He wasn’t that cruel as to do that to his brother.

  “You think if she knew, then everything would be better?”

  Johnnie shook his head.

  “No, but it’s still the right thing to do.”

  Zed looked into the distance and contemplated what that might mean.

  I could lose everything I have. Or perhaps everything but Rave. She knows exactly what I was and still accepted me. That says a lot about her standards and convictions.

  “You know that even if I do tell her, that won’t make anything any easier. Jay is still coming for you, and it’s pretty clear the new Boss will be coming for you, too. You said I made sure nobody bothered you while I was that man, well I ain’t the one who set the dogs on you, am I?”

  That made Johnnie think long and hard.

  “Maybe all this shit kicked off after I arrived, but maybe it was because I wasn’t there to keep things in check anymore.”

  “Oh, don’t give me that. Do not try and tell me we lived free because of your mercy. Don’t you dare!”

  “You already said it. Brothers don’t kill brothers. But who is this new Boss? Nobody that cares whether you live or die.”

  Johnnie was getting ever more angry and looked like he was close to boiling point. He wanted to hit Zed again. He could see it in his eyes, but still he held himself back.

  “Plenty of shit in this life, brother. But maybe what we fight t
o hold onto is more important than what we try and destroy.”

  With that, he left. Johnnie sat down, contemplating his words. Zed hated the confrontation with his brother. More than anything he remembered how close they used to be all those years ago.

  The rest of the day passed slowly as he waited and watched for Jay to come, but he didn’t. Zed went back to bed well before the sun went down. He was still exhausted and recovering. He had gotten a few hours of sleep when his sheet being lifted woke him. He was startled and quickly opened his eyes. Sasha was climbing under the sheets with him. She was naked and cold. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close.

  “I always prayed I would see you again,” she whispered.

  “Look, Sasha…” he began.

  But she silenced him by putting a finger to his lips.

  “You don’t need to say a word. Let’s just take what we can while we are still alive and free to do so.”

  He smiled as he thought back to Rave’s advice on life. Maybe her simple philosophy wasn’t so stupid after all. She kissed him, and it felt amazing. For that moment all his troubles seemed to wash away. He wouldn’t hold back anymore. He embraced her tightly and kissed her as passionately as she kissed him. No matter what the next day brought, they were going to make the most of the time they had that night.

  * * *

  Zed awoke before sunrise for the first time in as long as he could remember. The bed was soft and warm, and Sasha was wrapped around him. There was so much on his mind that he couldn’t lay there any longer. He got out of bed as she groaned and went back to sleep. He pulled on his clothes and stepped out, heading for the walls where he could take in some fresh air and think clearly.

  His brother’s words sat heavily on his conscience. Lannie had come out in such strong support for him, and yet he still harboured such massive secrets from her. He knew that to tell her could destroy her, and possibly him, but he didn’t know how fair it was to go on like they were. He sat there for almost an hour when he heard someone approaching. It was Lannie herself. He was a little startled and uncomfortable, and that didn’t go unnoticed by her.

  “What’s up?” she asked, sitting down beside him.

  She was closer than a friend would sit, and he couldn’t help but feel she was still in love with him, and that only fuelled his guilt. He had to come out with it, no matter the consequences.

  “Come on, you know you can tell me anything,” she added softly.

  She put a hand on his shoulder and drew just a little closer, but he grasped her hand and pushed it off.

  “You know how much I would have wanted to get you back? But I can’t, and I shouldn’t. You don’t know me anymore, Lannie. You haven’t for a long time.”

  “What do you mean?”

  She giggled a little and clearly wasn’t taking it seriously.

  “There is something I should have told you when I first found out. My memory loss, that is all true. I did just wake up a couple of weeks ago, not remembering anything but years ago when we were together. That is the God’s honest truth. But the things I have found out about myself, and the things I have done since I left you all those years ago, are unforgiveable.”

  “I don’t believe that. It doesn’t matter what you did. You are here now. We have all done things we regret. We have to just move past them.”

  He was shaking his head.

  “Not something this big. I have to tell you this, Lannie. I have to. We can’t go on you not knowing.”

  “Okay, okay, if you want to tell me, then fine. But I am not asking anything of you.”

  He accepted that, but he had no choice.

  “All these past years when Johnnie said I was dead. I wasn’t dead. I was something different, something horrible.”

  “What? What can be that bad?”

  “I was the Boss. I am the Boss. Or was until very recently.”

  She laughed for a short moment until his straight face didn’t change.

  “What? Why would you joke about something like that?

  “I am not joking. Go ask Johnnie. He knows. He kept it from you to save you from hurting.”

  She got up and walked up to the fences as if needing to throw up, but managed not to.

  “This has got to be some sick joke, right?”

  He shook his head as he walked nearer to try and comfort her, but she shrugged him off.

  “Don’t even touch me. I really do hope this is some sick joke, but I am not laughing. The Boss slaughtered thousands, friends of mine as well. The Boss is a monster.”

  “I am sorry. I don’t remember any of it. I don’t know why.”

  He tried to get close to her again, but she went back and held up her hands as if to keep him away.

  “Don’t you come near me, don’t touch me!” she screamed as she ran away.

  He felt awful, but he knew it had to be done. He looked out from the walls and let his mind wander to all the possibilities of what his future could entail. Whatever that might be, he was willing to throw his fate into the hands of those he loved.

  Chapter 24

  As the sun rose, the sound of voices shouting at one another echoed through the town. Lannie and Johnnie were at each other’s throats, and Zed knew exactly why. People were flocking out of their homes to try and understand what was going on. Many looked towards the sound of the furore and waited for them to come out. Everybody knew it was between the two of them, and nobody dared get in the middle of that.

  Zed was sitting on the edge of one of the improvised battlements with his legs dangling in towards the town. He could see Sasha approaching. He felt sorry for her, because she would soon have to deal with the same horrendous news he had given Lannie.

  “I guess she knows.”

  Zed turned to find Rave standing behind him. She had a knack for being able to sneak up and listen in to everything that was going on.

  “Lannie? Sure does, now.”

  “She’s not taking it well, then.”

  “Would you?”

  She shrugged. It didn’t bother her at all. In fact, she smiled and found the whole thing rather amusing. She clearly had respect for anyone who managed to take control and power, no matter how they went about it.

  “Are we getting thrown out again?”

  “I have no idea, but I’m not going without a fight.”

  The argument still raged in the distance. Sasha climbed up onto the wall and sat beside him. She had a huge smile on her face and was so close she was touching him. She wrapped one arm over his shoulder and kissed him on the cheek.

  “What’s that all about?”

  “Me,” he replied miserably.

  “Why? What have you done now? I thought they were all ready to throw you a party? You deserve it.”

  “No I don’t, Sasha. Really, I don’t.”

  “You’re so modest, Zed, and I love you for it. I will stay with you, no matter what.”

  That didn’t sit well with him at all. He was beginning to really care for Sasha, and now he was just going to hurt her, too.

  “I promise you, Zed, I am with you.”

  “No, don’t do that to me. You can’t promise that without knowing the facts.”

  “Then tell me, I am willing to listen,” she pleaded.

  “I’ve done dreadful things. Much more horrible than you can imagine. I am sure you will hear about it soon enough. Please, just go. Go and see what you think about me tomorrow, and the day after.”

  “I know how I’ll feel.”

  “No you don’t. If you care for me at all, you will go. I don’t want to see you again, not until tomorrow.”

  She began to weep as she got down and stormed off. He hated having to do it, but it was for her own good. One of the townspeople approached him, a man in his mid twenties. He had a sling holding his left arm up from some recent injury.

  “Can I help you?” Zed asked.

  “My name is Perry.”

  It rang a bell, but he didn’t remember why.
r />   “I came to get you off that cross,” he said.

  And now it all made sense. It was the man who had taken a bullet when rescuing him from the Jaytown Braves.

  “Yes, I remember now. I never got to see your face, or if I did, I am sorry. I was, well…”

  “I know how you were. I am glad you are okay, Sir.”

  “Don’t call me that,” he said sternly.

  Perry looked quite surprised.

  “Oh…okay.”

  “I didn’t mean to offend. Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind right now.”

  “I get it. I just wanted to come and say thank you for everything you have done for us, and for saving Sasha. I knew her a few years ago. It was a brave thing you did.”

  That only made Zed feel worse, and he could see his whole world was about to come crashing down. He had been the best person he could be since waking up, but the sins of his past had come back to haunt him.

  “Well, thank you again,” said Perry before wandering on.

  Zed hated himself for ever becoming what he had as the Boss. He didn’t understand how it had happened, and was beginning to wonder if he could ever walk away from that past. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed someone else walking towards him. It was Rave again.

  “Rave, why do you always seem to be hanging on the end of every conversation I have?’

  “I like to know what’s going on.”

  He stopped and listened to the echoes of the argument from his brother and Lannie, and nodded in agreement.

  “Ain’t that the truth?” he added.

  “Why did you tell Lannie?” she asked, sitting down beside him.

  “Because I am sick of not knowing where I stand, sick of all the secrets and bullshit. If I am going to make something of a life here, it needs to be an honest one.”

  “But you could have just said nothing, and we’d all be okay.”

  He shook his head.

  “I know you don’t get this now, but I had to do this. The town needs to know what I was if they are ever going to trust me.”

  “And why would they trust the old Boss?”