Unspoken Promises
Copyright © 2014 by Gabbie S. Duran
Cover art by ©Sarah Hansen at Okay Creations
http://www.okaycreations.com/
Editing done by Edee M. Fallon, Mad Sparks Editing
https://www.facebook.com/MadSparkEditing
Formatting by Stacey Blake at Self Publishing Editing Service
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above copyright owner of this book.
“Angel” words and music by Chip Taylor, Steve Miller, Eddie Curtis
© 2001 EMI Blackwood Music, Inc. and Cotillion Musis, Inc.
All rights controlled and administered by EMI Blackwood Music, Inc.
All rights reserved used by permission. Reprinted with permission of Hal Leonard Corporation.
Author links:
Author page: http://gabbiesduran.com/
Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorgabbiesduran
Twitter: @gabbiesduran
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7093957.Gabbie_S_Duran
Find other titles by Gabbie Duran on Amazon.
ISBN-10:0990471314
ISBN-13: 978-0-9904713-1-8
Dedication
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Acknowledgments
About the Author
To Yamara and Cezanne, who always reminded me to never rush this story, and to my daughter, Stephanie, thank you for always listening.
HAVE YOU EVER wondered why everything happens? I do … I cannot seem to understand why I woke up in that hospital without my memory, or why I haven’t gotten it back yet? Although, at this point, I’m beginning to cope with the fact that I might never get it back. Even if I did, do I really want to go back to being the person I once was?
I was known to the world as a stuck up, conceited bitch. I was a person with a controlling agent, who just happened to be my cheating fiancé. He didn’t love me. He only loved my money. According to the tabloids, I was someone who had no care in the world for anyone but myself, and although I had no memory of who I once was, I knew it was true.
But that was my past and now I’m in the present.
The last three months have been a challenge for me, but I wouldn’t change a moment of what has happened. Three months ago I woke up in the hospital not knowing who I was, or why I was there; a blessing in disguise. It was the day I actually woke up for the first time to the person I wanted to be. I no longer care if I recover my memory of who I was. All that matters is who I want to be.
Now that I’ve left it all behind, I don’t regret a moment of walking away, especially from Bill. Walking away was the best decision of my new life.
If it weren’t for Emily’s memories I would have never found Matt. He might have only been a memory the day I first dreamt him, but my reality of him is far from a dream. I long for those memories now, as well as treasure them. They help me understand Matt, even though I don’t require them for me to love him. He’s everything a girl could ever wish for, and right now I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Knowing that his promising love for me will be the answer that I was never looking for gives me hope of a better me.
The day I knocked on his door, I never expected for my life to be turned upside down and inside out. I never expected that I’d have to fight the feelings I was having towards Matt, causing me to build a barrier around my heart to protect it. But I guess love always wins in the end. He found a way to break down that barrier. He found his way into my soul with his compassion, sexy smile, and his warm, tender eyes. He is my weakness.
I knew from that moment on that I was holding onto him and never letting go. Matt was mine to keep, and there was nothing that was going to take him from me.
At least that is what I believed until I woke up this morning.
Every girl grows up believing in happily ever after, the kind of happily ever after that will last forever. Every girl wants one, she dreams of it. She lives for that one day she will finally find her prince who will give her that happy ending.
I thought that's what I had finally found when Matt said he loved me last night. I thought I had found my prince when he said I was the one. The one he had chosen, and the one he loves, finally giving up his past for me.
I thought when we declared our love to each other that we would be a happily ever after from that moment on. But do they always last forever? I was about to find out.
I STARE DOWN at Abigail as she sleeps. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. Since the moment I saw her standing at my front door that day she came looking for me, I thought I was the luckiest bastard in the world just being able to lay eyes on her.
She looks so peaceful as she takes shallow breaths, in and out, in and out. I know she’s exhausted. Shit, I’m just as exhausted at this point, but I just cannot resist waking up to watch her sleep. She’s lying on her stomach, her face in my direction. She has a light smile on her face, as if she’s in a peaceful dream. I wonder if she’s dreaming about us.
I kept her up for most of the night, unable to satisfy myself with her body until the early hours of the morning, but it’s because it’s Abigail.
She’s different.
Even with Laura, while in high school, it was always a rush just to sneak sex in. Then as we both left to college, it was rare if we got to spend more than a couple of days together. It was usually just a weekend at a time, if we did see each other. Even within those couple of days with her, I wouldn’t crave having sex with her.
I just cannot get enough of Abigail.
Shit, I already wanted her again, but I know she needs her sleep. Her body needs to rest after the ordeal she was put through this weekend. Realizing that if I keep lying here next to her, my boner will not ease up, I would either have to relieve myself or go against my own word and take her again.
Nope. I’m going to be a good boy and let her sleep.
I lean down and kiss her on the shoulder, unable to resist feeling her silky skin against my lips one more time before I get up. She lightly twitches as if feeling my touch, but doesn’t stir any more than that.
Wit
h a smile I get up and out of bed, already searching for my boxer briefs, not knowing where the hell they’re at. Last night we were both in a hurry to get each other’s clothes off. They went flying everywhere.
Giving up on clothing since I cannot find them in the dark, I quietly open the door, not wanting to wake her, and do the walk of shame to my own room. With a chuckle, I think, it’s not a fucking shame what we did last night. If I could, I would announce it to the world that Abigail Adams was now my girl.
I’m almost at the guest room when I pass Trey on his way out of the bathroom and he stares at my naked body with a raised eyebrow.
“Can’t say I cock blocked you last night. From the screaming and pounding coming from the room, I guess you’ve kissed and made up.”
Wanting to pound his face for his comment, I force myself to keep it under control. He’s right. Abigail had no reason to forgive me for the way I’ve been fucking up with her, but I promised her I wasn’t going to do it again, and I intend on keeping that promise.
“Just drop it, Trey,” I say, knowing if I don’t shut him up, he’ll continue.
“Whatever, dude. Just don’t fuck this one up. I like her, and by the way Kelly was about ready to attack you last night, I’m thinking she already has a cheering squad behind her. Myself included.”
I nod my head knowing he’s right as I walk into the room.
After getting dressed in my go to basketball shorts and t-shirt, I throw on my shoes and head to the kitchen to cook Abigail some breakfast. I decide to make pancakes for her, knowing she cannot get enough of them. She earned them after getting her qualifying time in San Francisco and it killed me knowing I wouldn’t be able to cook them for her when she was done to celebrate.
Better late than never.
As I’m reaching into the fridge for the eggs, I hear a knock at the front door. I immediately rush to open it, praying whoever it is doesn’t ring the doorbell. I don’t want them to wake my beautiful girl up. Swinging the door open, I see Lisa, the girl that Abigail caught me fucking on the table, standing there with her eyes bloodshot red, and crying. I tense, knowing this is not going to be good.
“What are you doing here, Lisa?”
She sniffles and says, “I need to talk to you, Matt.”
I look over in the direction of Abigail’s room, making sure it’s still closed before I pull the door back to give Lisa access to come in. As I shut the door, I do a recheck down the hall one more time before I follow Lisa into the living room.
She’s already taken a seat on the sofa, forcing me to my reclining chair so I can keep as much distance between us. The last thing I want her thinking is that I want to be next to her.
“So what’s up?” I ask, hoping I can get her out of here within the next couple of minutes.
Lisa continues to sniffle as she cries, twisting her hands in her lap and it’s annoying the fuck out of me that she’s not saying something.
“I’m late,” she lets out, barely above a whisper.
“What are you late for?” I ask with a confused look on my face, thinking she’s lost her mind. Shaking my head, not knowing what she’s talking about, she repeats, “I’m late, Matt. I haven’t gotten my period,” she clarifies.
My heart sinks and I stop breathing as I take in her words. Unbelieving what I’ve heard, I stand up and start pacing in front of the fireplace, wanting farther distance from her.
“What the fuck do you mean you haven’t gotten your period?” I ask, still shocked. “Are you sure?” I add, still not believing her.
“I took a pregnancy test and it was positive,” she says, nodding her head, sniffling again.
“That’s not possible. I used protection. There’s no fucking way you can be pregnant,” I practically shout at her.
Thinking back to that night, I know I used protection; I always make sure I use protection. Since the first time I dipped my dick into a pussy I made sure I was gloved up.
Then it dawns on me and the blood drains from my body. I didn’t use a condom with Abigail last night. Not once in the five or six times I made love to her. It didn’t occur to me because I was so desperate to be inside her. I loved the feeling of her warmth wrapped around my cock. Even if she would have asked me to glove up after that first time, I would have begged her to reconsider. There was no way I was not feeling her like that again.
Hearing a gasp come from the hallway, my head whips in that direction, my eyes finding Abigail’s. I should have known she was there. I had almost sensed her before I heard her. Normally I can since my body is always craving her look or touch. But this time I’m feeling the dread of knowing that she might have heard what we’ve said.
She’s still standing in it, as if she’s attempting to stay hidden, but failing because I can see her hand holding onto the corner of the wall revealing her presence. I see her pull her head back and her hand disappears. I rush to the hallway wanting to hold her, wanting to reassure her that this is all a mistake, but as I turn the corner I see Trey blocking the entrance and she’s already disappeared behind the door.
Trey shoves me back into the living room. “Leave her the fuck alone. She doesn’t need this shit from you!” he says, shouting as he points in Lisa’s direction.
Heated from not being able to get to Abigail, I shove Trey back, but he’s already expecting it. He blocks me, shoving me again with his shoulder, making me fall on my ass on the ground behind me.
This is why he’s my center, he protects me with force, letting no one through, and it’s exactly what he was doing with Abigail, protecting her.
“Abigail, please!” I shout, not knowing what else to say as I scramble to get myself up off the floor.
I feel someone grab at my shoulder. Confused, I turn to see Lisa’s pleading eyes. “Leave her, Matt.”
Pissed that she would even say that, I snarl back at her. “Go home, Lisa. I’ll call you later.”
I don’t want her here when I’m begging on my knees to Abigail.
“I’m not leaving until we figure out what to do.”
My blood is boiling from the shit that’s happening. I hate that I cannot talk to Abigail and I want to kick Trey’s ass, but I don’t want to deal with Lisa right now. Knowing my only choice is to leave, I walk over to the island where I keep my keys and grab them and my wallet as I walk straight out of the door.
Digging my phone out of my pocket, I start dialing Abigail’s number, but it goes to voicemail. That doesn’t surprise me; she probably hasn’t turned it on since yesterday.
I jump into my car and turn it on, listening to the roar of the engine. I throw it into reverse, peeling out of the driveway and up the street. Hitting the steering wheel, hoping it will compensate for the pain that is tearing me up right now, I picture a broken Abigail back at home. But I already know, no matter how hard I try, she isn’t going to talk to me right now, especially so soon after fucking up.
I cannot believe this is fucking happening right now, but in reality there’s no one to blame for my stupid mistake but myself. I had stopped screwing girls the day Abigail moved into the house. I didn’t want to give her a reason to confirm my lifestyle. Why, I don’t know. But knowing she was there was all I needed to make the shit stop.
Then I go and fuck it up because I had come home with a case of blue balls one night. Remembering her face when I had looked up to see her and Kelly standing near the doorway nearly kills me. What the fuck was I thinking? That was the first time I had fucked up with her and I could not stop doing it ever since, no matter how hard I tried not to. Not even twenty-four hours after promising her I wouldn’t ever fuck up again, I was already breaking that promise.
I keep driving, knowing I need to see the one and only person who will make me feel better.
MY BODY IS numb, unable to move. The firmness of the wooden door behind me is the only thing keeping me standing as I lean against it. My arms are wrapped around myself as I keep my eyes tightly shut, wishing I was dreaming, and at any moment I
will just wake up. I keep praying what I heard is another memory, one that doesn’t really belong to me, but belongs to Matt’s sister instead.
But I know I’m awake, which makes it hurt more.
I had woken up to the other side of the bed being empty, my mind wondering if last night was instead a dream when I had opened my eyes, but the warmth of Matt’s body was still present. It left me with hope that I wasn’t dreaming. His smell was still on the sheets, teasing me with need to still have him next to me, which is why I got up to go look for him.
At first I thought that he had snuck out again before I woke up, like he’s done in the past. His absence made me think he might regret what happened last night, but I just as quickly forced myself to push the thought from my mind as I remembered Matt’s words yesterday; the promises he had made. That was the reason why I got out of bed.
Now I regret getting up.
Had I stayed in bed like my body was begging me to do because I was still exhausted, I would have never heard their conversation, or even known she was here. But as I stare into the space of air ahead of me, I question whether Matt would have even told me she had come. Would he have told me the truth?
“Supermodel, you okay in there?” a concerned Trey says as he knocks at my door, the vibration hitting my back from the force he adds into it. Suddenly, I feel the door being pushed behind me, making me step forward as it opens. Trey steps into the room, the light from the hallway illuminating the room a little.
He takes one look at me and his grim appearance speaks for itself. It’s telling me just how pissed he is and he isn’t attempting to conceal it at all.
Staring at me, he says, “They’re both gone now, so you don’t have to keep hiding in here.” He folds his arms in front of his chest before he continues. “You want me to call Kelly?”
Unable to speak, I shake my head at him. He nods, still standing there, as if refusing to leave. It’s as if he’s waiting for me to give him some sort of reaction. What the fuck does he expect me to do? Begin sobbing like a lunatic or go psycho with rage? I don’t have the strength or will to do either. The only thing I want is to be left alone.
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