Blood of Cupids

by Sophia Kenzie

  Danny climbed into the ring. He looked strong, big, and an entire section went wild for him. Was Ryan going to fight this guy? Was this whole match thing actually happening? I honestly thought it would be a cover up for something bigger. Maybe it still was.

  “And in the red…” Time slowed as I saw Ryan. His hair was wet, falling into his face. He lifted his arms to the sky, welcoming the display of his defined torso to the room. I wanted to reach out and touch him. I wanted to stand up…but he couldn’t know I was here. I slouched in my chair. “From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, we have our very own, Ryan Cassidy!”

  The room erupted, and my heart stopped. Ryan Cassidy? Ryan Cassidy? Not only was he high up on the totem pole, he was the fucking president’s son. I wanted to disappear. I wanted to take back my whole week. What the hell was I doing there?

  I needed to get out. Could I slip out without being noticed? I slid to the floor as the bell rang, signaling the start of the match. He was light on his feet, jumping around his opponent. Then he swung. It was a strong uppercut, and it sent the other guy back a few steps. The crowd was screaming. I could still run. I could get out. I stood up, knocking over a beer onto the girl in front of me. She stood and pushed me. Normally I’d fight back, but I was trying not to draw attention. She continued to push, and I lost it, kicking her straight against the ropes of the ring. This distracted Ryan, and the guy in blue hit him with a left hook. Ryan fell, and I screamed.

  He lifted his head, and looked right at me. It took a second for it to sink in, but when it did, his jaw dropped.

  “Grace. No. No. Get the hell out of here.”

  I nodded, dropping everything, and ran out of the building. I heard yelling; a loud noise, and then I felt my arm go numb. I became dizzy, using my other hand to fight the burning sensation of my upper arm. I kept grabbing at it, but I couldn’t feel anything. I looked down. My hand was red. The color was blinding even in the darkness. It was blood. There was so much blood. It hit me: oh my God, I had been shot. How? Why? I just needed to get to the road. There were so many loud noises—guns I think—as I approached what I could only assume was their clubhouse. If I could just make it past there…

  An explosion. I saw it first, then the sound radiated through my ears. The blast lifted me off my feet and threw me back. My head slammed against the ground and everything went black. It was as though I was closing my eyes for an extended period of time. Every time I opened them, I saw something new. I heard something new. I was disoriented. Nothing made sense.

  Then I heard the bikes. That must have been my family. They’d blown up the Cupids’ clubhouse, and I was stuck here, motionless, in the middle of a field. I was not getting out of this alive.

  The next time I opened my eyes there was a shotgun pushing against my chest.

  “My arm…” I begged. It hurt so much. I could feel the pounding take over my body.

  “Who are you?” It was a deep voice, a voice I strangely recognized. Why did I recognize it?

  “Ryan?” I cried. I knew it wasn’t him, but I wanted him there. I needed him to be holding me.

  “Ryan? You know Ryan?” Shit. I wasn’t thinking clearly. Once they figured out who I was, God only knew what they would do to Ryan. I tried to fight my muscles, but my head answered his question with a nod.

  Darkness again.

  I felt my body lift off the earth and my head fell against a hard surface.

  “Grace, I’m here. Please wake up. Grace.”

  “Ryan…” I squeaked out. Something was wrapped around my arm. It was so tight, and all I could hear in my head was the sound of my blood pumping.

  “Yes, babe, I’m here. It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I promise.”

  His voice was cracking. It was so loud. There were people everywhere.

  “You know her?” It was the voice again.

  “Yes, she’s my…she’s my friend.”

  “Why is she here, Ryan?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “How did she know you were down here?”

  “Shut the fuck up. I don’t know.”

  “I can’t find her wallet. What’s her name?”

  “It’s Grace.”

  “What’s her last name you idiot?”

  “I don’t fucking know!”

  If I had any control over anything in that moment, I would’ve cried. They were about to figure out who I was: in front of everyone. Ryan was about to find out that I was not his friend; I was indeed his enemy.

  “Pops!” It was Ryan again.

  “Ryan, what happened?” There was a different voice.

  “I don’t know. She ran out of the match when I saw her. They must of thought she…I don’t know…someone shot her, and then clubhouse blew.” He was having a hard time getting words out. “She must have been too close. I told her not to come tonight. I don’t know why she’s here. Grace.” He was shaking me. “Grace. Please wake up.”

  “Grace?”

  “He doesn’t know her last name.”

  There was silence. Someone touched my forehead, my cheek. I opened my eyes and was staring at an older man, an older Ryan. He moved my hair from my face and sighed. His lips pursed and his brow furrowed.

  “It’s Brennan. Her name is Grace Brennan.”

  “Shit!” Screamed the voice. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

  He stood up, leaving my view. Only Ryan remained. Complete shock filled his face: shock and betrayal. Please, Ryan, say something.

  “Grace? You’re…You’re Grace Brennan?”

  I nodded. The blackness took over.

  May 1, 1993

  Darling J,

  Oh how I miss you. So empty my life has been these past few years without you in it. I fought myself every minute, every second, but I thought I was doing what was best for my family, my daughter. Did you know I had a baby girl? She’s simply beautiful, and she’s my whole world, but I catch myself staring at her and wishing she were half yours. So how can I do what is best for her when I’m not doing what is best for me?

  I must see you. Each night as I close my eyes, your face calms me to sleep, but I fear I’m losing you. Your eyes are blurring in my memory, and I just can’t let that happen. As I lose pieces of you, I lose more of me.

  My husband is leaving for a ride next weekend, for at least a week, and I will be coming into the city with Gracie, my little girl. Find me. I’ll be there. Please, find me today, tomorrow, and past the light.

  I’ll be seeing you,

  E

  Ryan – Present Day

  I don’t know what made me look, but my attention was drawn to the crowd. I immediately faced the consequence of my lack of focus as I felt a swift blow to my face, and fell to the mat. I have never done anything that stupid, and I never went into a match without complete concentration, but today was a whole different situation. Outcomes raced through my mind; I couldn’t stop predicting when The Walking Shadows would strike. That’s when I saw her: her hair, her body, her face. What was she doing here? I could feel my heart jump into my throat; I was suffocating from fear.

  “Grace. No. No. Get the hell out of here.” I whispered. No louder sound could I find within me, but she heard, she nodded, and she ran.

  That’s when the shouting started. She was running past armed guards. What the hell was I thinking? Of course they would be on high alert. But I sent her out there, into the unknown. I could only pray she wouldn’t be confused for an enemy. But my prayers were overlooked. I heard the first bang, then the second. They’d started to shoot. What had I done?

  I stopped the match. Well, I didn’t necessarily stop it; I just jumped out of the ring and started running. I got to the doorway and searched the darkness. I could hear the commotion behind me, but tried to tune it out in order to find Grace. Maybe I wasn’t too late.

  An explosion…my eyes fought to focus as I watched our clubhouse surrender to the engulfing flames. I heard the distant sounds of bikes amidst the roar of the fire. Of course, The Walking Sh
adows MC were here. They were here and they were leaving and we missed them all because I had suggested we plan a stupid boxing match. Grace was somewhere in this wreckage because I wanted to fight.

  I dropped to my knees, unable to move. People were running past me, but I was frozen, helpless. The idea of ever moving from that spot seemed a distant hope, until I heard her. Her voice cut through the disaster. Grace was saying my name.

  “Ryan?”

  I looked around, trying desperately to find the voice.

  “Ryan? You know Ryan?” It was Uncle Sean. Had he found Grace? He was only a few yards from me, holding a shotgun toward the earth. No. It wasn’t the earth; it was a body. He was holding a gun to my Grace.

  “Sean! Stop!” I rushed to her side, but suddenly stilled as I saw the blood. Oh God, what had happened? I needed to stop the bleeding, but I had nothing. I wasn’t wearing a shirt. Only interested in saving her life, I ripped her blouse open and pulled it from her body. I hated that Sean was looming over her, eyeing my Grace’s half naked form, but I couldn’t let my jealousy be my focus. I wrapped her shirt tightly around her arm and lifted her off the ground, cradling her to my chest.

  “Grace, I’m here. Please wake up. Grace.”

  “Ryan…” her voice was weak, but she was alive.

  “Yes, babe, I’m here. It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I promise.”

  The next few minutes were a blur. Sean was yelling and asking for her name. I only knew Grace. She never told me her last name. Why hadn’t I made her tell me her last name? I needed to get her to a hospital, but of course, they were going to ask for her information. Then they were going to ask about the gunshot wound. How had I done so much wrong in so little time?

  I felt a hand on my shoulder, and the air seemed to thin. “Pops!” I needed that comfort.

  “Ryan, what happened?” He asked, out of breath.

  I explained how little I knew, but that I watched the clubhouse explode and heard the thunder of bikes as they left. Luckily we knew no one was hurt, because everyone was watching the match. Still, it didn’t take away from the fact that our enemies had planned a successful attack on us. I should have chased them. I should have jumped on my bike and made them pay, but I needed to hold her. I needed her to be okay.

  “Grace. Please wake up.”

  “Grace—?” Pops questioned, sounding worried, confused.

  “He doesn’t know her last name.” Sean finished his thought.

  There was silence. His hand left my shoulder and moved to her forehead, her cheek. Her eyes opened at his touch. She was still with us; maybe she could tell us where her wallet was hiding. But I didn’t want to ask her a single question. I only wanted her to know I would never leave her side.

  Pops looked at me and shook his head. I could see his face twist as he caught his breath.

  “It’s Brennan. Her name is Grace Brennan.” He gave a knowing, regretful smile and turned toward the still burning clubhouse.

  “Shit! Are you fucking kidding me?” Sean lifted his shotgun in the air as he screamed.

  I was immobile, confused, shocked, and humiliated. She was looking at me. Her eyes were begging for forgiveness. Had she known this whole time?

  “Grace? You’re…you’re Grace Brennan?”

  She nodded, and her eyes closed. They stayed closed. What was I supposed to do?

  Grace- Present Day

  I think we were in a truck. It felt like a truck. The engine was loud, and the gravel crushed beneath us. My eyes didn’t want to open, but I could smell Ryan. Ryan had such a good, dark smell. He was holding me so tight against his bare chest. He kept whispering in my ear, but I could only catch random words. Nothing formed complete thoughts. I just wanted to sleep.

  Ryan

  “Her name is Grace Brennan and she’s from Alexandria, Pennsylvania. I don’t know where her insurance card is, or her driver’s license, but you need to fix her now.”

  “Calm down young man. The doctor is checking on her. We’ll get all her information soon enough, but I need you to put a shirt on.”

  “To hell with a shirt! Tell me she’ll be okay!” It wasn’t my proudest or most rational moment, but nothing else mattered to me.

  “I’ll go check on her. In the meantime, I need you to put on a shirt.”

  Pops unzipped his sweatshirt and hung it over my shoulders. Even in my bout of hysteria, I was happy he had come. I would not have been able to drive in my panicked state. Sean was dealing with the fire, and I’m sure, paying off the cops. I felt solely responsible for the evening’s massive fuck up.

  “Pops, I had no idea who she was.”

  “I know.” He was quiet, not offering anything extra.

  “And she didn’t know who I was…at least at first?” I formed it as a question because in that moment, I knew nothing. But she couldn’t have known.

  “You don’t know that.”

  “I do. I went after her.” I squinted my eyes as my head began pounding. “It was that fucking red hair, I swear.”

  He laughed, shaking his head. “How long has this been going on?”

  “Since last Friday.”

  He sat up. “Ryan, really? You’re acting like a damn love sick puppy dog after only a week?”

  “Fuck no. I’m not a puppy. I just want to make sure she’s okay. She had nothing to do with this.”

  “She showed up to your match, and within a few minutes, our clubhouse exploded.”

  “Pops, she didn’t do that.”

  “You’re so goddam blinded by her, you can’t even see what she is. She’s a Brennan, Ry. She’s the enemy.”

  I wanted to punch him. How dare he speak of her in such a way? I could feel my face redden with anger as my fists clenched. He didn’t know her like I did. He knew nothing about her.

  Then again, what did I know? We had spent a short few hours talking, but other than that, our relationship was pure lust. She could have been putting on a show. It could’ve all been for my benefit. What if I didn’t know Grace at all? Fucking Grace Brennan.

  I couldn’t defend her. I had nothing. “How did you know?”

  “How did I know what?”

  “Her last name was Brennan.”

  He choked out a short laugh and ran his index finger and thumb along either sides of his mouth. “I used to know her mother, a long time ago.”

  “What?” Grace had clammed up when I mentioned her mother. How had Pops known her?

  “Uh, yah, you know, she hung around the club.”

  “Our club? But wasn’t she married to Brennan?”

  “God Ryan, how am I supposed to remember? You know how broads hang around the clubs. I just knew her from around. Point is, Grace looks—” He slowed his speech, “—she looks just like her mother did.”

  He seemed irritated at my badgering, but things still weren’t adding up. “So her mother is dead?”

  “Fuck, ask your God damn ol’ lady herself.”

  “Pops, what the hell is wrong with you? Maybe I screwed up, yes, but I had no idea who this girl was. Had you ever felt the need to share any information about the Shadows’ history with me, maybe this wouldn’t have happened.” It was a silly comeback, but I was grasping at straws.

  “Listen,” he stammered, looking hard at me before continuing, “Okay, maybe you’re right. And yeah, it was pretty terrible. Grace’s mom, uh, her name was Emily, I think, she got mixed up with this guy in our club, a newbie, and Bowie found out.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “Christ, Ryan, do I have to spell everything out for you? He fucking killed her. What do you think it means?”

  Patrick Brennan killed his wife? Did Grace know? Was she aware that the person who raised her was the same one who killed her mother? I felt a sudden desire to protect her surge through my body. I needed to protect her. I didn’t want that scumbag anywhere near her. Maybe that’s why she had come to Philly? Maybe she was trying to get away from it all? And now her father was waging a war on her new cit
y. Was he doing it to scare her?

  “I know what you’re thinking, Ry. No, it’s impossible that she’s not a part of this.”

  “She can’t be.”

  “How well can you know someone after a week?”

  “Pops. You know me. You know I don’t get involved. So trust that I’m right about this.”

  “Okay, say you are right about her.” He reasoned with me. “Say she loves you and would betray her family for you. I just told you that her father killed her mother, because she fell in love with one of us. What do you think he’ll do to her? Are you willing to be the reason she winds up dead?”

  I hadn’t thought about that. All I knew was that I wanted to protect her. Was leaving her alone the only way? And could I actually do that? I thought about nothing but her. She had consumed me. Would I be able to leave all that behind? Was I being selfish?

  “Let’s go home, kid. We have some cleaning up to do.”

  “Pops, I can’t. I need to make sure she’s okay.”

  “Ryan, can you just drop the stupidity for a second? We’re leaving.”

  “And I’m staying. I need to talk to her. Please trust me.”

  He shook his head and pushed himself out of the chair. “I’ll be with your family cleaning up the mess that her family made. Just think about that.”

  He turned down the corridor, out of sight. I felt suddenly alone. He was right. What was I doing here? This woman most likely betrayed me. She set me up, and yet, I was waiting for her to recover, trusting in only my gut. I was sitting in the hospital when I should be repairing what was broken. I had only known Grace for a week. My family needed me, and I was letting them down.

  I chased after him, turning the corner of the long white hallway, and caught a glimpse of my Pops just as he was stepping into the elevator. My attention was split as another set of doors sounded an arrival. Pops turned around as three large men stepped out, each with deep indented worry lines etched across their foreheads. As the doors to his elevator closed, he caught my eyes and shook his head. He wanted me to get out, but it was too late. They were coming straight toward me.