by Andrew Grey
I
Two Years Ago
“Thank God, it’s Friday,” Jim Kulik said to the room as he finished up his last transaction. The financial markets had just closed for the Memorial Day weekend, and this was the first day in weeks that he’d be able to leave the office early. A colleague poked his head into the office and wished him a good weekend before continuing down the hall. Jim quickly completed the last of his paperwork before turning off his computer, grabbing his papers and briefcase, and heading out of the office. He knew if he didn’t leave right away something would come up, and since he was in the office, he’d be asked to handle it.
Jim was anxious to get home. Jerome would be working until five, giving him time to make a nice dinner and get everything ready. They hadn’t been able to spend much time together lately, so he wanted to make sure they had a special holiday weekend.
Leaving his office on Wilshire Boulevard in Los Angeles, he headed to the freeway, hoping that he’d be able to head off some of the holiday weekend traffic. It took him about forty minutes to travel to their apartment in Glendale. Jim had lived in the same apartment complex for the last six years, and when he’d asked Jerome to move in with him three years ago, they simply moved to a larger apartment in the same complex.
Pulling into the parking garage below the building, Jim was pleased to see that Jerome’s car was in his spot. Pulling into his own space, he parked his car and headed to the elevator. Arriving on the third floor, Jim walked to the apartment. He was surprised to see the door open. Walking into the apartment, the first thing he saw was suitcases stacked in the living room. Thinking Jerome had planned a surprise trip, Jim called out happily, “Jerome, are we going somewhere?”
Jerome stepped out of the bedroom, looking flushed and a little embarrassed. He was wearing his usual attire—tight jeans and a skin-tight T-shirt. “No, just me.” He stepped across the room to his suitcases, a sad expression on his face. “Jim, I’m leaving. This isn’t working for me.”
Jim said nothing; he was stunned and he found he could barely stand. He stepped back and sat on the sofa.
Jerome sat next to him, taking his hand. “You’re always working, and we rarely see each other.” He took a deep breath and continued. “I do love you, and I know you love me, but you love your job more. I’ve always been second in your life to your job.”
“Is there someone else?” Jim finally managed to ask.
“No.” Jerome shook his head. “I would never do that to you or myself. The entire time we were together, I was never unfaithful, just lonely. When we were together, it was wonderful, but we were never together enough to span the hours I spent alone.” Jim held his head in his hands, and Jerome gently stroked his back. “This is for the best, for both of us. You need to be free to pursue your dreams.” Jerome sniffled before continuing. “I will always love you; I want you to know that.” There were tears in Jerome’s eyes as he tried to continue speaking. “I’m staying with my parents until I can find another place to live. Most of my things are packed, and I’ll arrange to get the rest when I find a permanent place.” Jerome slowly got up from the sofa.
Jim finally managed a few words. “I do love you, Jerome.”
Jerome actually smiled. “I know you do.” Jerome took a few deep breaths, trying to still all the emotions that were swirling around inside him. Kneeling down in front of Jim, he gently lifted his head to meet his eyes. “Jim, I love you, too. In fact, I probably always will. You were my first great love, and you were good to me. I’m not leaving because of anything you did.” Jerome looked at the ceiling, blinking back tears, trying to find the right words. “I’m leaving because you can’t give me what I need, and I don’t want to end up hating you.” Jerome’s tone was soft. “When we met, we always said that no matter what happened we’d always be friends. Well, I’m hoping that when time passes we can be friends again.” Jerome slowly leaned forward, placing his lips gently against Jim’s. “You take care. I’ll call you next week.” Slowly, Jerome got off his knees, picked up his suitcases, and walked out of the apartment, carefully closing the door.
Jim didn’t move, couldn’t move. Finally, he got up from the sofa and walked into the bedroom where there was a note on his pillow. Slowly, Jim reached for it. The letter said the same things Jerome had said in person. Without realizing it, he pressed the letter to his chest, letting the tears well in his eyes. Lying down on the bed, he sobbed into his pillow, letting himself feel the sadness and grief. Eventually, he cried himself to sleep.
An hour or so later, he woke to a wet, tearstained pillow. Pushing himself off the bed, Jim went to the bathroom and splashed some cool water on his face. Drying himself with a towel, he walked back into the living room, picked up the phone, and dialed, his fingers automatically pushing the buttons on the phone.
The phone rang three times before it was answered. “Hello.”
“Joan, it’s Jim.” He was trying to keep his voice even, and it didn’t work.
“Jim, what’s wrong? You sound awful.”
Jim tried to get the words out, but they stuck in his throat, and he found himself sobbing into the phone. When he was finally able to speak, “Jerome left,” were the only words he could get out.
His sister was sympathetic. “Oh Jim, I’m so sorry. I know you loved him.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Did you have a fight?” Her tone was calm and caring.
The words were coming easier now. “No, he said he was lonely. He knew I loved him, but he said I loved my job more, and I think he may be right.” The tears started again.
“No, he wasn’t. You didn’t love your job more than you loved Jerome; I could see that the last time I visited.”
“But—”
“No buts. Jim, you were always driven to succeed. You were the only one of us to actually manage to break away from this small fishing village on the edge of nowhere and actually make a life for yourself.” His sister had always had the ability to cut to the heart of the matter. No bullshit with her.
“I know, but at what cost? Mom and dad haven’t spoken to me since I left.” That was his only regret—the pain his leaving Alaska caused his parents. But he knew he had to make his way in the real world outside the small Eskimo fishing village where his family lived.
“I know, but I’ll tell you a secret. They’re proud of you. They tell everyone how successful you are.”
“Then why won’t they tell me?” Tears started to fill his eyes again.
“Jim, you know how proud they are. On some level, your leaving means that they failed you somehow. Give them a call next week; make the first move. They do love you and miss you. They’re just too proud to make the call.”
He could understand that. His parents had always been exceedingly proud. Proud of their Eskimo heritage, proud of their children, and proud of what they’d been able to accomplish. “But what about…?” Jim was ashamed to even speak about the way he left.
“That was a long time ago, and no one really remembers. Just call them!”
Jim actually started to feel better. “I will. I think it’s time I swallowed my pride and got my family back.” He could almost hear Joan smiling on the other end of the phone.
“I love you. Take care of yourself and call me next week.”
“I love you too.” Jim hung up the phone, feeling a little better. Heading into the kitchen, he made himself a quick dinner before turning on the television.
The rest of the holiday weekend was quiet and lonely. He hadn’t realized how much Jerome filled his life. On Tuesday, he headed into the office at his usual time: five-thirty. He always liked to get to the office before the markets opened in New York. About eight, his managing partner stopped by and asked to speak to
him in his office. Jim checked to make sure everything was in order before heading to Bill’s office.
Jim knocked, and Bill waved him into the office with a huge smile on his face. “Jim, I wanted to give you this personally.” He handed Jim an envelope. Jim opened it and saw that it was a copy of a payment voucher. “That’s your bonus for last year.”
Jim looked at the amount and then looked again. He knew he’d had a good year, but he didn’t realize just how good. Jim worked for a large brokerage firm. Basically, he managed other people’s money—lots of other people’s money. Most of his clients had millions of dollars, and it was his job to see that those millions grew year after year. Over the last year, he had managed to secure some very lucrative accounts, including those of some very famous and very wealthy people. The amount on the payment voucher was more than most people made in a lifetime. “Bill, this can’t be right.”
Bill smiled. “We checked it three times; it’s right. You brought in over half of the new business last year. You deserve every cent.”
Jim stood up. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me; you earned it.” Bill smiled as Jim left his office.
Jim went back to his own office. Using his computer, he brought up his current brokerage account and was surprised at the balance. He had always been very careful with his money. Over the past six years, he’d made good money, and they’d lived very carefully. Jerome had always been a bit of a spendthrift, so Jim had never told him about the size of his annual bonuses. Instead, he’d always had them deposited directly into his brokerage account and invested the money. This strategy had been good to him. Very good to him. Shaking his head, he got himself back to work.
In the middle of the week, Jim finally got up the courage to call his parents. His mother answered the phone in her usually happy voice.
“Mom, it’s Jim.”
“Jim, oh my goodness, it’s good to hear from you.”
“It’s good to talk to you too, Mom. I’ve missed you, very much.”
Jim could tell his mother was trying not to cry. “I’ve missed you too. How are you doing? Joan told me about Jerome. I’m sorry.” His mother then started in on the local gossip, telling him about all the people in the village: how they were doing, who was getting married, who had died, and who was pregnant. It was like he’d never left and they’d never fought about him leaving. Jim could only be thankful that maybe he’d be able to get his entire family back.
As his mother was starting to wind down, he heard the other phone pick up. “Jim, is that you?”
“Hi, dad, how was the fishing?”
“Good, real good.” His father had always been a man of few words, but just the fact that he’d picked up the phone made tears of happiness run down Jim’s cheeks. “You going to visit this year?”
“Yes, I am, dad. I just need to—” He heard his father start to cough on the other end of the line. “Dad, are you okay?”
His mother answered. “He’s got emphysema; smoking all those years caught up with him.” Jim suddenly knew what he needed to do and what he was missing.
“Mom, dad, I just thought of something important that I need to do. I’ll call you in two days; I promise. It was good to talk to you both.”
“Okay, we’ll talk to you then,” his mother replied. They hung up the phone before he could say anything more.
Jim sat in the chair in his living room thinking. He’d been living in Los Angeles for six years. He’d met Jerome four years ago at a business function. They’d hit it off right away, started dating a few weeks later, and within a year they were living together. In the last six years, the only person he’d let into his life was Jerome. Other than him, his life had been nothing but work. Looking around the apartment, everything seemed temporary, like he was waiting for something to change. Maybe it’s time for a change.
As promised, he again called his parents. The past two days had been extremely busy, hectic days, but Jim had finally been able to work out what he needed to do. His mom answered the phone.
“Mom, it’s Jim.”
“Jim, how are you? Are you coming for a visit?”
“Well, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. I’ve decided that I’m not coming this summer for a visit.” He could almost see her disappointed face. “I was wondering if I could come home?”
Her voice perked up. “What about your job?”
Jim could only smile. “They really don’t want to lose me. So they’ve agreed to let me work from there. I’ll need to travel back occasionally, but we’ve worked it out. Some of my accounts I’ll transition to other people, and some I’ll continue to manage.”
He could hear her put the phone down, yelling to his father, “Jerry, our boy’s coming home!” Her voice was nearly breaking.
Releasing the breath he’d been holding, Jim brushed the tears from his eyes as he smiled into the phone, telling himself, “Home, I’m going home.”
II
Present Day
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Dave Roberts exclaimed.
“I’m afraid not. We need you there.”
“But Alaska! You’re transferring me to Alaska? What did I do to deserve this?”
“Dave, it’s not a punishment. The office in Anchorage needs a person with your skills. You are the perfect choice for this assignment. Besides, it isn’t forever.”
“No, John, it’ll just seem like forever. I mean, I’ve done good work, hell, I’ve done great work, for years. I just don’t understand why I’m being transferred to Alaska.”
“The truth is—you have done great work, even stellar work. The West Coast region is having trouble, and a large portion of that trouble is in Anchorage. They can’t find anyone with your skills.”
“But—”
“Look, you can refuse the promotion and stay here. But it will be a long time before you’ll be offered another promotion. However, if you can pull this off and turn things around in Anchorage, you’ll be able to have any assignment you want.”
Now Dave was starting to get interested.
“Word of success would reach the highest levels,” John added
Now Dave was interested. “How long an assignment is it?”
“You would be transferred, but I doubt you’ll be there more than a year.”
Dave was shocked. “That long!”
“I’ve already gone to bat for you. If you take the assignment, the company will rent a house for you in Anchorage, and you’ll get a raise and travel expenses. I even got them to agree to add an additional week of vacation.”
Dave was starting to get the picture. They really did need him. “Can I get all of this in writing?” He was no fool; he knew promises were often made and then conveniently forgotten.
“Does this mean you’ll take it?”
“It means I’ll think about it. Have the details spelled out in writing, and I want their best offer. I’ll give you my answer tomorrow once I’ve seen the offer.”
John gave him a bright smile. “Fair enough.”
Dave got up to leave the office, and John said, “Can I ask you a question?” Dave nodded. “You’ve spent most of your vacation time camping, fishing, and hiking for the last few years, right?”
“Yes….” Dave was wondering where he was going.
“Alaska is an outdoorsman’s paradise. I think you’ll really like it.”
“Okay. I’ll think about it. Tell them to dig deep on this one, best offer in writing tomorrow.”
John nodded. “Okay. Come in at ten; we’ll review the offer together.”
Dave nodded. “Thank you.”
He went back to his office, shutting the door before plopping himself in his chair. He’d been hoping for a promotion, but Alaska? Well, why not? It was a promotion, and if they made it worth his while…. Dave picked up the phone, dialing Chris’s number almost automatically.
“Hello.”
“Chris, it’s Dave.”
“Hey Dave, you want to ha
ve lunch?”
“I can’t. It looks like I need to pack.”
“Pack? Where are you going?”
“Well, they offered me a promotion, but I need to relocate. Unfortunately, they need me in Alaska.”
“Alaska?” Chris echoed, shocked. Then he was quiet for a bit. “You know, that may not be so bad. I had an aunt who lived there for years. I visited her a few times. It’s breathtakingly beautiful.”
“I was expecting to be harangued for thinking about it, and you practically tell me to go?”
“You’ve wanted this promotion for a while. Take it. You can always move back if you don’t like it. Besides, Milwaukee’s not Eden or anything.”
“Well, the truth is that they’ll make it worth my while, and I already know the director out there. She’s a friend….” His voice trailed off. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad.
“When do you have to let them know?”
“They’ll present the offer tomorrow in writing.”
“Sleep on it. You’ll know in the morning.”
Chris had been right. In the morning, after a good night’s sleep, Dave realized that this was a great opportunity, and if the offer was good, he’d take the job. A change of scenery and location might be good. There were too many memories here anyway.
Dave headed into the office at his usual time. Rumors were flying about his promotion and relocation to Alaska, but he refused to talk about it. A few minutes before ten, he left his office and headed down the hall. John was a senior vice president and was many steps above Dave, but the two men had a history that no one else in the office knew about, so John had taken an interest in Dave.
Three years earlier, Dave had met Kevin, a bright energetic, handsome young man. Kevin was twenty-five when they’d met, the same age as Dave. They’d fallen in love, and after six months, they decided to move in together. They got a small apartment and spent the next six months in happy, love-filled bliss. Both families were supportive, happy that they’d found one another, and welcomed them.
