Sun Touched (Diamara Book 1)
Page 15
"No. No. How could you think that?" She backed away from Madea as if she were poisonous.
"You've watched from a distance as he has paraded younger and younger women around, while you're here, underground, living a half-life. That must hurt. It must feel like he plunged a knife into your back and is twisting it, over and over again." Madea pushed herself out of her chair and moved closer to her mother. She could smell the sweat of grief, anger, denial which was gathering on her mother's brow. She didn't want to hurt her, but she was angry too, angry that this woman could possibly put her revenge ahead of everyone else’s welfare.
"He deserves to pay! Don't you dare try and tell me he doesn't." Tahra spat the words at her.
Madea held a hand out as if to stop the venom. "I never said he didn't. He did you wrong, he did me wrong too. He's to blame, but that doesn't mean that everyone else has to pay too. That wouldn't be fair."
"He deserves to pay," Tahra said again, though some of the hurt had evaporated. Her shoulders slumped forward a little and her gaze fell to the floor.
"He does. And we'll find a way, but not like this." Madea covered the distance between them and wrapped her arms around her mother, squeezing her tightly. "But before we work that out, why don't we figure out how to get Garrett back?"
"Garrett." Tahra exhaled his name. "He's a good man."
"So I've noticed," Madea said wryly.
"You like him, don't you?" Tahra broke the hug and held Madea at arms-length, looking her in the eyes.
She had to tell the truth, there was no way she could lie right now. "I do," she admitted. "He might have dragged me into this mess, but he's done his very best to watch out for me, even when I didn't think I needed it." Madea pressed a hand to her belly, trying to hold in the nausea.
"Be careful. You're pregnant, and that's a lot for any man to take on. Even Garrett."
"Yeah."
"You should go and check on the boy. Jaxon, is it?"
"That's him. He'll wake soon."
"I'll get some food brought down. You should rest for a bit, and then when you're ready, call me and I'll come and visit. I'd like to meet this child you're so dedicated to." Tahra smiled, and Madea couldn't see any trace of malice in it.
"Sure." She nodded, then pecked her mother on the cheek. "I am sorry, about Garrett. If there had been another way, I would have tried to stop them, but I knew he wanted me to stay safe."
"He's always enjoyed playing the hero. We'll get him as soon as we can. I'll send some people up to start searching."
"I hope we can find him soon," Madea said, then she remembered the phone and reached into her pocket. "Garrett gave me this. He said the number on it was for his device, you should be able to track him that way, right?"
Tahra took it from her and flicked through screens. "Yes, this will do the job."
"Thank you."
"No need to thank me. He's part of our family and we take care of our own."
Madea could hear a million messages in those words, but none stronger than the one which spoke of her father's choice and the impact it'd had on her mother. "I'll see you soon, then." She left the office, her mother, and the awkward knowledge that now nestled in her stomach.
When she made it back to the unit she could still hear Jaxon's soft snores from the bedroom. She smiled and headed into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. By the time she sat down on the couch to drink it, Jaxon was awake. He came out, rubbing his eyes and scanning the room.
"Hey." She smiled and opened her arms to him. "How are you feeling?"
"Good. Tired." He frowned. "Hungry."
Madea laughed. "Food should be here soon, enough to fill that little tummy of yours."
"Your tummy isn't as little," he said.
"What?" She raised an eyebrow.
"Your tummy. The baby is making it bigger, isn't it?"
Madea slid a hand to her belly and rubbed it. He was right. It was rounder. When had that happened? Garrett was right, she was spending more time thinking about everything else and had been ignoring the baby growing within her. She was so far removed from her body that she hadn't even noticed. Lucky for her the clothes Tahra had provided were stretchy. Hopefully by the time she got any bigger, this whole mess could be resolved.
"I guess it is, gotta make more room in there for it to grow."
"Do you know what it is?"
"It's a baby." Madea smiled.
"No, I mean, do you know if it's a boy, or a girl?"
Madea chewed her lip, unsure of the right answer. "I don't know. I hadn't thought about it."
"I think it's a girl." He nodded sagely.
"You could be right."
"Can I touch it?"
"I guess that's okay." She moved her hand away as Jaxon reached out and placed his small palm firmly against her bump.
"Can you feel it moving yet?"
"No, not yet." That was one thing she was positive she'd actually notice. It would be a little difficult to ignore something moving around inside you.
There was a knock on the door and she moved Jaxon aside to answer it.
"Your food." The man at the door had greying hair, and pale skin which made him look like he hadn't been outdoors in years.
"Thanks." She smiled and took the tray, returning to the couch and placing it between her and Jaxon. "Dig in."
"It smells good," Jaxon said reverently.
"It does, doesn't it?" Madea inhaled the rich scent of yeasty bread and fried meat. Her stomach grumbled and she grabbed a slice of the loaf and slathered butter on it before taking a bite. "So good."
"Where are we?" Jaxon asked. "Can we see Rickard today?"
"Not today, but soon. I promise. I'm going to try and sort this all out," Madea said. "And, to answer your first question, we're actually under the city. That's pretty cool, isn't it?"
"Under? I didn't know there was an under."
"Neither did I, kiddo. There are a whole lot of things I didn't know that I'm learning about now."
They ate in silence until five minutes later there was another knock on the door. "That's going to be my mother, even though she told me to call her when you were up. She wanted to stop by and meet you."
"Your mum? You didn't tell me about her."
"Well, until a few days ago, I thought she was dead. Turns out she wasn't."
"Do you think that means my mum is really okay?" Hope brimmed in Jaxon's eyes and Madea cursed herself silently.
"I couldn't say for sure, Jaxon. That would be nice though, wouldn't it?" She had to stop talking before she had thought about what she was saying. Now he had the idea that somehow Janae was okay, that her Hollowing was some mistake and there was a chance they'd be reunited. "I better get the door."
She crossed the room and let her mother in, who smiled at Jaxon. "Hi there, my name's Tahra."
"And you're Madea's mum, right?"
"That's correct."
"And you were dead, but now you're not. Where did you go when you were dead? Do you think my mum might be there, too?" The words chased each other out of his mouth so fast that they almost tripped over each other. Tahra gave Madea a panicked look.
"I don't think she knows your mum, Jaxon. But I'm sure that if she sees her around, she'll let you know. Okay?"
"Okay." Jaxon nodded solemnly.
"I thought I would stop in and meet the young man who seems to have stolen my daughter’s heart." Tahra gave him an over-the-top wink and he blushed.
"Mum! Leave the kid alone," Madea said.
Jaxon mumbled in the direction of the floor. "My mum asked her to look after me."
"So I heard. Your mum sounds like a pretty special person,” said Tahra.
"She is." He nodded again.
Madea shifted her weight from one foot to the other, not sure how to steer the conversation onto less awkward things. "Do you want something to eat? We have some food left over."
"I'm okay, thanks. A cup of tea would be nice though. Do you remember how I take it?"
"Wh
ite with two sugars, right?"
"Right." Tahra smiled and moved across the room to take a place on the couch next to Jaxon. Madea watched them for a moment then went to the kitchen to make tea. By the time she returned, Jaxon was laughing along with Tahra.
"Thank you," Tahra said, taking the steaming mug. "You look tired, Maddy."
At the mere mention of tiredness, a wave of it crashed over Madea and she yawned. "I guess I am. It's been a long few days."
"Well, Jaxon and I were talking, and he seemed interested in seeing more of the tunnels. Why don't I take him for a little tour while you get some rest?"
Madea chewed the inside of her cheek as she thought. She desperately wanted to sleep, and yet, she felt like she was always fobbing Jaxon off onto someone else. "Do you want to?" she asked him.
"Yes, please. I've never been underground before!" He was practically bouncing off the couch with excitement.
"Then I guess it's okay by me." She smiled, though she didn't feel as sure of this as she should. Tahra was her mother. She could trust her with Jaxon. Right?
"Great! It's settled then. Come on, Jaxon. Let's get going." She stood up and offered the boy her hand. He took it with a moment of hesitation. Madea kissed him quickly on the forehead. "Two hours. Don't let me sleep any longer than that, okay?"
"We'll be back here by then, don't worry." Tahra smiled as she closed the door behind them.
Madea listened to the patter of their feet down the hall. Jaxon was chattering away, and Tahra murmured her agreement. Madea wanted to open the door and chase after them, but she didn't have the energy. This week was taking its toll on her in more ways than one.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Madea woke to a splitting headache. What was it about waking these days that meant there was pain involved? She couldn't remember the last time she’d got out of bed—or up from the ground, or off the medical table—where she had felt genuinely good in both mind and body. She sighed as she sat up, then paused, realizing that she couldn't hear anyone else in the unit.
She frowned and moved into the living area. No, they definitely weren't here. She called Tahra's office but there was no answer. Glancing at the clock, she realized that she'd been out for almost four hours. A streak of panic shot through her.
She flung open the door and charged down the hallway, stopping the first person she came across. "Have you seen Tahra? I really need to find her."
"No, sorry. Her assistant might know, though. He should be in her office."
"Thanks," she called over her shoulder as she ran down the hall. By now she knew the way, and within five minutes she was yanking the door open. The same grey-haired man who had brought her food was sitting at Tahra's desk.
"Where is she?" Madea demanded, planting her hands on the desk and leaning towards him.
"She took your young ward out of the domes. Said she had something to show him."
"She did what?" Madea shrieked. "How long ago did they leave?"
He glanced at his clock. "About three hours, give or take."
"Do you know which exit she took? I need to see her. Now." She ground her teeth together.
"Why don't I show you," he said warily as he stood. "It will be quicker."
"Thank you." She waited impatiently while he moved to the door, then followed closely as they made their way to the exit.
"Here," he said when they came to a stop. "I won't go up there though. You're on your own."
"That's fine, thank you." She would much rather keep this little spat between the two—three—of them. Jaxon didn't need to hear it, but she wasn't sure she could contain herself until they got back to the tunnels and found some privacy.
Madea swung the hatch open, making a note of its location before closing it again. She scanned the landscape for Tahra and Jaxon. Nothing. Dust kicked up under her heels as she moved, but there was no sign of life. After a few minutes she noticed the ether creatures floating through the air. They seemed to be converging on a particular point in the distance. Garrett had told her that they were drawn to humans, drawn to the energy or the chemicals in their bodies, which might mean that Tahra was in that direction. She set out, pushing aside her nerves.
It wasn't long before one of the creatures floated towards her. One of its tendrils swam through the air and nudged her in the abdomen. Her body shook as they connected and she dropped to her knees, preparing to experience the same thing she had last time. But it never came. There was a vibration through her core, and a flash of half images, but nothing as intense or dramatic as before.
And then she felt something else, a flicker of red and the sound of a heart beating, the sound of her own voice speaking as though through layer upon a layer of cotton wool. Her stomach cramped and she cradled it with both arms, feeling something stretch within her.
The baby.
The child moved again, her tiny feet pushing against Madea's stomach.
Her. It was a little girl, like Jaxon had said. A new emotion swept over Madea as she realized that the child growing within her had been touched by the ether creature, and that somehow, that touch had linked the two of them. She was feeling, hearing the things her unborn child was experiencing, seeing glimpses of memory from the baby's short existence.
Tears coursed down her face as she stroked her bump. "My beautiful girl. My beautiful baby. I'm here."
The child stretched in response and sent a wave of love to her. It crashed through Madea's body, unbalancing her.
"Maddy? Are you okay?"
She felt her mother pull her upright and forced her eyes open. "I'm okay," she murmured. "I'm fine, really." More than fine, but she wasn't ready to share that with Tahra. She tried to find the anger that had flared within her when she'd realized her mother was exposing Jaxon, but the new connection that had been forged with her baby girl through the ether creature's touch was still too new, too raw, too joyous to allow real anger to take hold.
"Where's Jaxon?" she asked.
"I'm here! Tahra showed me some stuff I've never seen. Did you know I've never been out of the domes before? It was amazing. I can't believe how bright it is out here, how sunny." Jaxon's chatter filled her ears and she found herself smiling at his enthusiasm.
Then she faced her mother. "You said you would wake me up after two hours. You told me you'd be back."
"I took care of all his needs," Tahra said, each word spoken clearly. "And you needed your rest."
"You can't help yourself, can you?" Madea asked, feeling sad all of a sudden. She shrugged her mother's hand off her shoulder. "I'm really disappointed."
"We don't know of any children who have been Touched, Maddy. I told him all about it, and he wanted to. He knew that I was, that you are, and his mum...he wanted to."
"He's six," Madea hissed in Tahra's ear. "He's not old enough to be making these decisions by himself. I can't believe you would go and do that behind my back. Actually, I take that back. I can believe it." She clenched her jaw, resisted the urge to grind her teeth together again. Her anger was building, a slow burn. And then the baby doused it, squashing it down as if to remind her that there was no harm in being Touched. But it wasn't about the exposure, it was about the way Tahra had done it.
She shook her head, confused by the feelings in her body. For all anyone knew, babies at this stage in pregnancy didn't really have thoughts and personalities. Perhaps contact with the creature had advanced this child, changed it on some level. That would explain the connection, their psychic bond, and the child's awareness of everything going on around it.
Madea forced herself to take deep breaths and relax the tense muscles in her shoulders. "Well, I think we should be getting back. Don't you?" She looked pointedly at her mother.
"Yes, I bet you're hungry Jaxon. We brought some sandwiches with us, but he finished those off ages ago."
"I am hungry," Jaxon agreed with a nod.
"Right. Let's go then." Madea slipped her hand into his and waited for Tahra to take the lead. She felt b
etter for having his fingers in hers, for being able to feel that he was alright. How long would it be before he changed though? And what effect would it have on him? There were too many unknowns in this equation, and she might never forgive her mother for using Jaxon to experiment on.
They made it back to the hatch easily, and shortly after Tahra supplied Jaxon with more food, which the boy eagerly devoured. Madea was amazed at the amount he could consume. The baby nudged her, suggesting that she eat as well.
Apparently Garrett would no longer need to remind her about the baby; she was doing a pretty good job of it on her own. Madea let a little laugh slip out. Tahra raised an eyebrow.
"Nothing."
"Okay." Her mother's eyes narrowed, but she didn't press the matter. "We should talk about Garrett. Do you want me to get someone to look after Jaxon?"
"He'll be okay. We can get you some pens and paper," she said to Jaxon. "Right, Mother?"
"Sure." Tahra rummaged in her desk for some supplies, then set them up on the desk for Jaxon.
"We're going to have a chat," Madea told him. "We'll be over on the couch. Let me know if you need anything."
"Okay." He didn't look up from his drawing, one of a man she thought could be Rickard, and a woman who could be Sarai. Or maybe her.
"Do you really think it's a good idea to speak in front of him?" Tahra whispered.
"Did you really think it was a good idea exposing him without talking to me about it first?" Madea shot back.
"I'm sorry. I guess I didn't think you'd let me if I asked, and I wanted to see—"
"Yes, you wanted to see what would happen. He's my ward, and you had no right—" Madea closed her eyes and exhaled, inhaled, trying to still her emotions. "It's done now, and you better hope there are no negative side effects from this. If anything happens to him, I am holding you responsible."
"Noted."
"Did you manage to find out where they are keeping Garrett?" she asked.
"It appears he is somewhere in your father's home. That's where we tracked the locator on his phone. Do you have any idea where Carson might hold a prisoner?"
"No, but I know someone who might." Madea chewed her lip.