TNT

by Lagomarsino, Giulia

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “I’m leaving.”

  “Don’t,” he pleaded. “Please don’t go. Storm’s an asshole. He didn’t even realize-”

  “Storm’s the asshole?” I shouted. “Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

  He swallowed hard and took a step closer. “I’m the asshole. I know that, but I love you.”

  I scoffed. “You love me? How could you love me when half the time we’ve been together, you were laughing at me and pretending that I was nothing more than the crazy chick that was ruining your life?”

  “Molly, you have to understand, I didn’t remember.”

  And that part hurt the most. I hadn’t thought about it too much before. I was just happy that he remembered me. But now, looking back, I could see that it should have been my first sign to walk away. How could our connection really be that strong if he didn’t remember that? Was it all a lie?

  “And you laughed at me behind my back all that time. You know, there were times that I was talking with your boss or your friends, and deep down, I felt like they were laughing at me. But I brushed it off because everyone seemed so nice. I thought, people aren’t really like that. They don’t mock people just for the sake of it, especially people that should be mature enough to know better.”

  “You have to understand, I didn’t remember you, and you just started showing up everywhere. They all thought that you were a one night stand that was stalking me. You brought me food and you always wanted to see me. To everyone, it looked like you were crazy.”

  “Yeah, I get that. But you could have told me that the first day. You could have pulled me aside and told me that you didn’t remember me,” I shouted, my voice bordering on hysterical.

  “And would you have stopped showing up? I mean, it’s not who you are, Molly. You’re the woman that shows up when you think you’re needed, and that’s one of the things that I absolutely love about you now. When you came after me at your parents’ house, I can’t tell you what that did for me. It was the best fucking feeling in the world to know that you loved me that much that you wouldn’t give up on me.”

  “And that’s the difference, Tony,” I said sadly. “I’m the person that gives no matter what. If I see someone that needs me, I go to them and try and help them. You’re the person that laughs at people.”

  “No,” he insisted. “It was just an odd situation.”

  “And you didn’t have the guts to just tell me. Instead, you laughed behind my back with your friends like a bunch of teenagers and called me crazy. You made up stories to try and get out of seeing me, but never did you once tell me that you didn’t know me. If you had done that, I would have understood at least. But you made me a laughing stock, and you know what? I’ve been laughed at my whole life. I changed myself when I was younger so that I could fit in with crowds, and that didn’t really work out too well for me. So, I decided that I would be who I was and if people didn’t like me, that was their loss. And I was fine with that. But then I met you and I knew that you were the one that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Call me crazy, but I saw you that night. I saw the man inside and I knew that he was good and a person that would never let me down. I never thought you would be the one to make me feel like the most ridiculous person in the world.”

  I could tell by the look on his face that he felt terrible, but I was tired of being the laughing stock. For once, I wanted someone to see me and love me for who I was. I didn’t want to have to jump through hoops for someone. And now that I knew exactly what everyone thought of me, how could I ever face any of them again?

  I picked up my suitcase and started for the door, but he stepped in front of me. “Please, Molly, don’t do this.” I looked up into his eyes and could see the desperation there. I could feel it rolling off of him. “I need you. I know I was an asshole, but …please, stay with me.”

  “Believe me, Tony. I want to, but I can’t be the fool anymore. I feel like such an idiot. All this time, I thought that I was sticking around, pushing myself on you because your friends said you needed it, when really, they were just fucking around with you. I thought-”

  “I know, Molly. I know that you feel foolish now, but they see it now. They see how good you are for me. That’s not fake!”

  “It was fake all along, Tony! Do you know how stupid I felt, pleading in front of your friends and not giving up all those times that you pushed me away? And I did it because I thought you were pushing me away over Delaney. I thought your friends were pushing me to stick it out because they thought I was good for you! I was a joke! Everything about this was a joke!”

  “No-”

  I shoved past him and walked out of the suite. Maybe it was silly of me. Maybe I was overreacting, but when you’re hurt by the person you love, you can’t help your reactions. And right now, I felt like everything I thought was real was entirely fake. I ignored the stares as I walked down the hall and refused to let anyone try and talk me out of staying. Storm approached me, but I glared at him and he immediately backed off.

  I wasn’t sure who it was that got me out of the building, but someone was there getting me through all the protocols and away from the looks of pity as I left. I felt like such an idiot, and now I had to figure out how to move on with my life, and I had to seriously reevaluate the choices that I had made. They were the choices of a doe-eyed, lovestruck girl. Now that my eyes had been opened, I needed to figure out my life and take a hard look at the choices I made.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

  Tony

  I followed her out of the building, telling anyone who got in my face to fuck off. I had one goal right now and that was to get to Molly and fix the mess that I had created. I ran up behind her and grabbed her arm, spinning her around.

  “Molly, please-”

  “Why can’t you just leave me alone? Haven’t you embarrassed me enough for one day?”

  “That’s not what I was doing. You’re overreacting.”

  “Really? So, you know how I’m feeling right now?”

  “That’s not- you’re taking my words out of context and twisting them around.”

  I knew I was on dangerous ground right now, but what happened was in the past and had nothing to do with what our relationship was now.

  “No, what I’m doing is choosing to walk away.”

  “Molly, you’re acting like this shit is still happening, but nobody has said a thing since I told them what I remembered.”

  “Really?” she asked, crossing her arms over her chest. “So, nobody has said that they should expect more crazy from me?”

  I hesitated, thinking about how the guys were just razzing me about Molly planning a wedding.

  “See?” she said, throwing her hands up in the air. “I knew it!”

  “It’s not like that. It was just the typical shit that guys say about the women they’re with. All the guys do it,” I said desperately.

  “They do?”

  “Yes, all the time! When Maggie was still pregnant, we all sat around the conference room and took bets on what kind of trouble she would get into when she went into labor. And everyone joined in!”

  “And you think that’s okay?” she snapped.

  “It’s okay because it’s true!”

  “Ha!” she pointed her finger at me. “So you do think that I’m a flake!”

  “What? No, that’s not what I said.”

  “But you said that you all said it about Maggie because it was true. If that’s really what you’re saying, then you’re joking around about me because you think it’s true!”

  I didn’t know what to say. How did women manage to take all our words and twist them to make them work in their favor? When I did that, I always ended up in the doghouse.

  “Just leave me alone. I can’t talk to you right now.”

  “But…I need you,” I said, not knowing what else I could say.

  She huffed out a laugh, shaking her head. “Well, maybe now you’
ll know what it feels like.”

  She turned and walked away, leaving me standing in the parking lot. I didn’t know what to say or do at this point. Nothing I was saying seemed to get through, and I had a feeling that anything I said from here on out would only make things worse. But I couldn’t leave. It felt too much like the night I left Delaney. I marched up the stairs to her apartment and banged on the door until she opened it.

  “What do you want?”

  “I need to check your apartment.”

  Her face softened slightly and she stepped aside. I took my time, checking every last corner of her apartment. When I saw it was clear, I checked it again, trying to find any excuse I could to make sure that I didn’t have to leave her apartment. What if I left and I never saw her again?

  “Tony, you’ve already checked the apartment. It’s safe, so you can go home.”

  “No,” I said firmly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Well, you’re not staying here.”

  “Yes, I am. I’ll sleep outside in the hallway if I have to, but there is no way that I’m leaving you.”

  She chewed on her lip and sighed. “Fine, but you’re sleeping on the couch.”

  ✯✯✯✯✯

  “Ow!” I shouted, jumping up from the couch. The damn cat was hanging off my leg, his sharp claws dug so far in that even when I started shaking him off, he wouldn’t come loose.

  “Problems?” Molly asked from where she sat in a chair across from me. She was drinking a cup of coffee like she didn’t have a care in the world.

  “Your cat is a menace,” I growled, prying the cat from my body. Blood dripped down my leg as I tossed the cat aside.

  “Yeah, I slipped her under your blanket in the middle of the night. You know, since you love her so much.”

  “What?”

  “Well, you did offer to let her move in with us. I guess that’s a moot point now.”

  “You’re still moving in with me,” I insisted.

  “That’s not happening. Oh, and I have to get to work, so you need to leave. Oh-” She snapped her fingers and held out her hand. “And I’m gonna need my spare key back.”

  “What? Why?”

  “Because you and I aren’t together, and as it’s been pointed out to me, I let too many strangers sleep on my couch.”

  “I’m not a stranger.”

  “Well, I only met you last week. According to some, I barely know you.”

  I sighed and ran my hand down my face. “Look, I know that I fucked up, but when you calm down, you’ll see that this is all a big misunderstanding.”

  “When I calm down?”

  I froze. She was like a wild cat right now. Any move I made could get me killed. “Uh…when we calm down?”

  She chuckled slightly, and then she chuckled harder. Then she flat out laughed. And the laughing didn’t stop for a good minute. When she stopped, it was sudden and her glare was deadly. She walked over to the table and grabbed my keys, pulling off her spare key for her apartment. She tossed my keys at me, along with my phone.

  “I need you to leave now.”

  “What about breakfast?”

  “You know I never make breakfast.”

  “Pop tarts?” I asked hopefully.

  “I ate the last package.”

  “Coffee?”

  “I only made one cup.”

  “But you always make a whole pot," I countered.

  “I took one cup and dumped the rest out. Now, I need to leave, so you need to walk out that door now before I call the cops.”

  “You wouldn’t,” I said, narrowing my eyes at her.

  She quirked her eyebrow at me, but I held strong. There was no way she would do it.

  ✯✯✯✯✯

  “I can’t believe she did it,” I said, rubbing my wrists as I walked out of the police station with Cap.

  “You know, you’re the second one of my employees that has been handcuffed for trespassing on a woman’s property that very clearly said she didn’t want you there.”

  “Hey, she said I could stay last night.”

  “Yeah, and she asked you to leave and you didn’t.”

  I climbed into his truck and slammed the door shut. I had been over this all morning while I sat in lockup and I just couldn’t figure out how this had all gone wrong. We were on the right path. If it wasn’t for Storm and his stupid fucking mouth, everything would have been fine.

  “I just can’t figure out what I’m going to do. Things were going so good for us. How do I win her back?”

  “Are you sure you want to?”

  “Please tell me you’re joking.”

  “No, I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I really like her. She’s good for you, and based on the fact that you might have gotten her pregnant because you’re too dumb to wrap it up, I’d like you to be able to work it out. But on the other hand, you’ve only known her two weeks. I mean, are you sure you love her?”

  “I’m positive. I know how this all looks, but I know what I feel. I can guarantee it’s what you feel for Maggie.”

  “And you’re prepared for this woman to have your kid and everything that comes along with that.”

  “Fuck yeah. I mean, I was hoping we would have a little more time together, but she’s the one. I know she is.”

  “Hmmm.”

  “What does that mean? Hmmm.”

  “It means that I’m thinking, asshole.”

  “Okay, and what are you thinking?”

  He pulled through the gates of Reed Security and parked. He got out without saying a word, so I jumped out and followed. “Cap, what are you thinking?”

  He spun around with a serious look on his face. “I’m thinking that there’s only one way for you to handle this.”

  “Yeah? Beg? Plead on my knees? Buy her a boat? Because I’ll do it.”

  “No, asshole, a boat is not going to fix this, and neither is pleading on your knees. No, you need to go big or go home.”

  “Just tell me what to do. I’ll do whatever you say.”

  He grinned at me and clapped me on the shoulder. “We need to get you a tux.”

  ✯✯✯✯✯

  “I don’t understand what the fuck we’re doing here.”

  I looked up at the sign on the shop at the strip mall and grimaced. Fun In The Sun Tanning. Yeah, this was a terrible idea.

  “You can’t get married looking the way you do,” Claire said, dragging me inside the shop. I wasn’t sure how she got involved or why she had any say in this, but I was going to have a serious talk with Derek when we got back.

  “How do I look?”

  “You look like a vampire.”

  Coop and Storm followed me into the salon with grins on their faces. “She’s right,” Coop said. “You’re so fucking pale, and you’re from Italy.”

  “Northern Italy, and it’s not like I came over on the ship. You know I’m American.”

  “It doesn’t matter where you’re from,” Claire said, dinging the bell on the counter for service. “If you don’t get a tan, you’re going to look washed out in all your pictures. Don’t you want to look good for your bride?”

  “I want to look like me,” I grumbled.

  “Oh, you will, but a little darker and a little more smoldery.”

  “Smoldery? That’s not even a fucking word.”

  “It is for women,” Claire chirped.

  A woman walked out of the back looking way too tan for someone that lived in Pennsylvania. Either she spent way too much time in the sun or she got a fake tan every other day.

  “Hi, my friend, Tony, needs a tan for his wedding today.”

  “Ooh, you’re getting married?”

  “Apparently.”

  “Well, let’s get you taken care of then. What are we looking for, Hawaiian crisp or Summer Sunkist?”

  What the fuck was the difference? I was about to ask when Claire answered for me. “Let’s go with Hawaiian crisp.”

  “Doesn’t that sound a little too dark
for me?”

  “Oh, you’re gonna love it. It’ll look so good with your dark hair.”

  “We’ll take it,” Claire smiled.

  “If I have to do this, so do Storm and Coop.”

  “Why do we?” Storm asked. “I’m perfectly tan on my own. I don’t need to do this.”

  “Too fucking bad,” I growled.

  “I wouldn’t mind getting a light tan,” Coop grinned. “The best man will do whatever he has to for the groom.”

  “Who says you’re the best man?” Storm asked. “I’m the one that’s been holding this team together over the past few months. I should be the best man.”

  Coop scoffed. “Right, like you’re best man material.”

  “I could be.”

  “You can’t even stand to talk to Jessica about marriage.”

  “That’s because we’re not ready for it.”

  “Hey!” I shouted, interrupting their arguments. “I’m not having a best man, alright?”

  “What?”

  “I’m hurt,” Coop said, placing a hand over his heart.

  “Look, you can both stand up with me.”

  “But who gets to stand next to you?” Storm asked.

  “Well, it should be Coop because he’s taller,” Claire said. Storm glared at her. “What? If you stand next to him, the balance will be off.”

  “Then I get to hold the rings,” Storm smirked.

  “Can we get on with this? I have a wedding to get to.”

  The lady led us to the backroom where there were five curtained off areas. I stepped inside and undressed, setting my clothes in the closed off area cubicle. “This is just a light tan, right?” I shouted out to the lady.

  But no one answered. A humming started and I got a very bad feeling about this whole thing. I was about to step out when the spray suddenly started. I spun around, trying to get away from it. I was freaking out. This should not be happening. I was fine with my pale self. But every time I tried to run away, I got shot with another spray.