The Seeker

by Ann H. Gabhart

  The first letters and sketches came in August. Sister Martha carried them to Charlotte. The summer heat sapped Sister Martha’s strength, and although climbing the stairs to Charlotte’s room made her breath come hard, she brought the letters there to Charlotte during the time of rest after the evening meal.

  It was a diversion, she said. “A gift to lighten the burden of my advanced years. You and the letters from the artist.”

  “But news of the war is distressing.” Charlotte looked up from Adam’s letter. She tried not to let Sister Martha note her eyes lingering on the sentences mentioning gardens even as her mind did welcome the thoughts he’d intended to spark with his words and the sketch of the garden bench. She thought of how she would write to him of the rose gardens at Harmony Hill. There would be no need to tell of stripping the blooms of their beauty.

  “Yea, it is ever so with wars that men of the world seem prone to engage in. But here at Harmony Hill, we will continue to gather peace to our bosoms and pray to keep the war from our village.”

  But days later, the Kentucky State Guard under the lead of John Hunt Morgan held a muster on the road that ran directly through Harmony Hill. The Guard leaders deemed the Shaker village a good central spot for men from the surrounding towns to join forces on the way south. Only weeks before, both North and South had promised not to recruit inside Kentucky’s borders, but the promise was ignored as the cocky young men noisily gathered to march to the aid of the Confederacy. Not so far away across the river bottoms, a man offered his farm as a place for Union recruits to be mustered into service. When word first came of that, a few young Shaker men had slipped away from the village to sign up to save the Union. The elders promptly went after them to fetch them back into the peaceful life at the village.

  Charlotte pulled her bonnet forward and kept her face away from the young men in the street. She knew many of them from social gatherings and political functions, but she had no desire for them to recognize her in turn. As was their custom, the Shakers provided the men who asked with food and drink. The Believers never turned any wayfarer away hungry or in need.

  “And these men are surely in need. If not of food then of spiritual rectitude,” Sister Martha said with a sad shake of her head when she came to get Charlotte from the hat-making shop to help with the extra cooking. “It is as Elder Quinton says. Such a grievous sorrow to see fine young men, though of the world, so ready to learn the best way to let out the heart’s blood of the ones they march against. You can see them out there practicing the thrust of their lances.” Sister Martha glanced over at Charlotte to be sure she was paying attention. “All the while calling themselves Christians. It cannot be. Mother Ann teaches us that.”

  “Yea,” Charlotte agreed. If she had learned nothing else while with the Shakers, she knew the value they put on peace. And yet at the same time, they seemed to hunger for news of the conflict as evidenced by their desire for her to carry on a correspondence with Adam.

  Sister Martha went on with the rest of her little sermon. “Our testimony is for peace, now and always. No Christian can use carnal weapons or fight. Not and be true to the faith. We oppose wars of households, and wars of nations. All wars are the result of lusts for lands and for women. Those who marry will fight.” She often repeated this teaching of Mother Ann along with other tenets as if by mere repetition she could plant the words in Charlotte’s heart where they might become as deeply rooted there as they were in her own.

  And so as the war clouds grew darker and Charlotte obediently walked the Shaker way, the letters back and forth marked the weeks and months that passed.

  August 11, 1861

  Dear Adam,

  It is not necessary for you to call me sister if the word sits uncomfortably on your tongue or does not flow easily from your pen. It has come to sound familiar to my ear. Aunt Tish, Sister Latisha now, has joined with us here and rejoices in the freedoms of the Shaker way. If you have the opportunity, please pass that news on to Mellie at your sister’s. Tell her she can write to us here if she wants. The Ministry allows letters as you surely already know since your letters have been given to me.

  Elder Quinton read portions of your letter at meeting. We had, of course, already heard news of the Battle at Bull Run, and were greatly disheartened by the Union defeat as it seems you were as well. The Believers seek peace in their villages and they can see that the country at war around them will greatly disturb that peace.

  Roses of all colors bloom here in the Shaker gardens. My mother’s garden bloomed with the same. I will hope the terrible smoke and fire of battle did not destroy every rose in the gardens you see.

  As always,

  Charlotte

  September 15, 1861

  Dear Charlotte,

  Peace would be desired by many now, but it appears peace is far from reach. A new general has been put in command of the eastern army after the defeat at Bull Run. General McClellan is insisting on discipline among the troops even as more recruits are enrolled in the army every day. Discipline was greatly needed as many in our companies of soldiers were out of hand for some weeks after their return to Washington. It is rumored there won’t be another major campaign before spring as the army licks its wounds and the leaders come to understand the need for intense training.

  I hear that the peaceful neutrality Kentucky so desired has been shattered and a provisional Confederate government has been established in the southern part of your state. Is there not another Shaker village in that area?

  The soldier in the sketch I enclose is my brother. He is nothing like me. I have also drawn your Shaker roses as I imagine them from your words. The gardens here bloom with the last roses of summer. But some roses never fade from a man’s memory.

  Your friend,

  Adam

  October 30, 1861

  Dear Adam,

  The Believers are very busy with harvest and I am going to the fields to help gather the seeds for their seed packets in the spring. The work dries my hands, but they have lotions that keep the skin from cracking. The elders worry their usual market routes to the south will be closed come spring unless the war ends very soon which as you indicate does not seem likely. We saw your sketches of the battle in Harper’s Weekly. The scenes of death caused much distress among us.

  We have heard little news of note except of course the conquest of the southern part of our state by the Confederates. My father must surely be beside himself. I think of him and Grayson often, but have no news from either since Sister Latisha came among us. They allow her to work in the kitchens almost exclusively since her rheumatism makes field work difficult. The Believers are kind to their elderly and infirm. Sister Latisha received a letter from Mellie, as did I. As you may know, she and Nate are married and she is expecting a child. The Shakers believe both to be sin and so Mellie’s news was no reason for rejoicing here, but I am thankful to know she is safe.

  An older sister named Martha has been instructing me in the Shaker way with great kindness. She is very patient with me even though I am slow to learn some of their tenets. Edwin, on the other hand, has embraced the peace of the village, and it is plain he is not the same Edwin I grew up with and once unwisely considered marrying. Even as I am not the same Charlotte. The Believers consider the individual family unit as the reason for much of the trouble in 308 the world. That is why they live as brothers and sisters only.

  The sisters picked the last of the roses for the rosewater before the frost last week. Thank you for the sketch of the roses and your brother. His eyes are much like yours. Sister Martha kept the sketch of your brother for the journal she keeps of the news of the war. Though I wrongfully desired to do so, I could not keep the one of the roses for it served no purpose other than ornamentation which is not allowed here.

  I miss the garden and all that was in it at Grayson.

  As always,

  Charlotte

  November 25, 1861

  Dear Charlotte,

  I can’t im
agine you working in the field as a common laborer. What would your father say if he knew you were doing so? Does he know?

  Here in the capital the men are settling into their winter camps. Some have been given leave to go home for a few weeks and others haven’t waited for leave, but have simply deserted their posts. I consider deserting mine. I am not enlisted in the army as the men are, but I am obligated to Mr. Johnson of Harper’s Weekly who wishes me to winter with the army and to stay abreast of the political maneuvering of the President and his Cabinet. I have gone to some of the parties and entertainments, but the gardens here are cold and without beauty.

  I send a sketch of the President. He looks very grave and ages by the week. I will send you no more pictures of roses, but we both must remember the rose sleeps under the snow of winter and blooms again with new life in the spring.

  Your servant,

  Adam

  December 29, 1861

  Dear Adam,

  My father has other problems on his mind with his support of the Union. There are many with Secesh sympathies in his district and I can only imagine the problems he may be having. It would be my mother who would be horrified by my day-to-day activities if she still lived.

  She would be surprised, as you may be as well, that I enjoy working with my hands at useful enterprise. While some of the duties are tedious and tiring, there is purpose in the performing of those duties. Unlike the tedious needlework pushed on a young lady as the proper way for her to idle away the time. Here there is no idle time and the needle is plied to make useful things such as dresses or shirts to wear or hats to sell. They let me try to spin silk from the cocoons of their own silkworms, but that is a skill that takes much practice. I am better suited to weaving baskets. Another thing that is hard on the hands, but there is no shortage of their medicinal lotions.

  I do miss my books, but Sister Martha says it is best to read the books about Mother Ann’s life and study her precepts and teachings. Even so I think of the garden of books in my father’s library and cannot always keep from regretting that I can no longer pluck the flower of one of those stories to bring the beauty of its words to my heart. The Ministry might strike out these sentences for they believe the beauty of anything lies in its usefulness and if the words only sing to one’s heart and do not instruct in right living then such words are better left on the shelf.

  It is good to think of the rose sleeping under the snow and to imagine it blooming again when I am able to return to the garden.

  As always,

  Charlotte

  February 7, 1862

  Dear Charlotte,

  The New Year has commenced. Your letter was late making its way into my hands due to the heavy snow in the east. The messenger could 311 not come to bring my mail for over two weeks. I felt fortunate to receive it before I left the winter camps around Washington, D.C.

  Mr. Johnson asked me to go west to observe and illustrate the troops under the command of General Ulysses S. Grant who has undertaken the task of securing the Mississippi River for the Union and disrupting the Confederates’ supply lines to Kentucky and Tennessee. Yesterday with the help of newly equipped ironclad ships, he surrounded Ft. Henry on the Tennessee River and easily defeated the Confederate forces there. When the fort’s commanding officer asked for the best terms for capitulation, General Grant gave no ground and called for immediate and unconditional surrender.

  With no chance for reinforcements, the Rebels had little choice but to lay down their weapons and be taken prisoners. Fifteen thousand of them. Some of the prisoners are being sent north, but others were paroled with the provision they won’t take up arms against the Union again. A condition there is no way to enforce, but there is also no way to handle such a large group of prisoners.

  The victory with so few losses is a good beginning for the Union forces in the west and may cheer the worried masses in the north. Bud Keeling, a reporter here, has sent in a report calling the taciturn Grant “Unconditional Surrender” Grant. He claims his story in the NY Times will make Grant an immediate hero. I doubt the General cares as he focuses on moving to his next objective which some say may be Ft. Donelson on the Cumberland River. Keeling and I are on one of the ironclads, but if the river narrows, we will have to find horses or march with the men. I will send a sketch of the ironclad for your Sister Martha’s journal whenever I am able to post this missive to you. Not an easy thing in the midst of war.

  It is difficult for me to imagine the Southern belle I met at Grayson now stirring soup and spinning thread. Are you gathering eggs and milking cows, too? What an image that brings to mind. One I am tempted to draw. But it’s far nicer to imagine you walking the snow-covered paths in the garden as you wait for the return of the rose.

  Ever your friend,

  Adam

  April 20, 1862

  Dear Adam,

  It took your letter some time to reach Harmony Hill. We hope you are still in health although we have heard of the many dead at Shiloh. It seems wrong to have a battle where thousands died or were wounded named after a church on the battlefield. The Lord must shudder at such brazenness. Sister Martha says the Believers’ Mother Ann would do worse than shudder at the total disregard of peace and love. The elders and eldresses have us laboring many dances for the swift arrival of peace. The whirling and dancing are the Shakers’ way of reaching for the spirit. I have learned many of the dances and songs. It is very different from the church I attended in town, but I never have to worry about dozing off. Meeting is too lively for that, but you know. You were here to witness their meeting one Sunday.

  Sister Martha says to thank you for the picture of the ironclad and wonders if you might include a sketch of General Grant in your next letter even though it appears he has lost some of his hero appeal. The papers indicate some in the North are calling for his removal due to the losses the army suffered at Shiloh. Still the Union came away victorious in the way battles are counted. The Believers were glad to hear that news and also of the abolishment of slavery in our great capital. I can only hope that the same will soon be true in Kentucky even though my father would argue against such an idea. But daily I see Sister Latisha’s face and I am glad.

  Sister Martha also asks me to remind you there is need to watch your words in your letters. She and they, the Ministry, are anxious to hear from the war front, but they will not allow wrong words such as those when you wrote of sketches that have naught to do with the war.

  Sister Martha understands that you are not that familiar with the Shaker way, but she wants you to know that she and the Ministry would welcome your questions if you should seek to learn more of the truth of the Second Coming of Christ who was their Mother Ann. That is the actual name of the Shakers, you know. The Believers in the Second Coming of Christ. Shakers is the name attached to the Believers by those of the world, but the Believers often use it themselves now. Shaker seeds and brooms and chairs are much sought by those of the world or were before the war disrupted so many lives. And gardens.

  Brother Edwin signed the Covenant a month ago and has given over Hastings Farm to the Believers. His people were freed. Two stayed here at Harmony Hill, but most went north to begin their new lives. It is too perilous for a freed slave here as they are seized for work on the roads or bridges without warning or recompense.

  I will pray for your safety and watch for your illustrations in Harper’s Weekly.

  With prayerful concern,

  Charlotte

  May 21, 1862

  Dear Charlotte,

  I am picturing the beauty of the gardens at Harmony Hill. While I am beginning to understand the Shakers don’t cultivate their gardens with the beauty an eye might behold in mind, as an artist I can’t imagine not noticing nature’s handiwork. I have been privy to so much beauty in gardens, but such beauty can seem very remote when the battles are raging around me. At times the battlefield scenes keep playing through my mind long after the guns fall silent. Then it is good to have the memory of
a beautiful garden to dwell on in order to shut out the visions of death.

  I am back in the capital where a new offensive is being planned. The men look more like soldiers now but it remains to be seen how well they will fare when once more they are ordered to march against the Rebel army. I also hear reports of rumblings to the south, some near your state. Guerilla bands are destroying rail lines and bridges and raiding the countryside for supplies. The Shakers might do well to think of what means they might take to protect their property if those raids should come near Harmony Hill.

  Here is Sister Martha’s picture of General Grant. He doesn’t look prepossessing but some think he is the best general for winning the day the Union has. At least he does not run from the fray.

  Assure Sister Martha and the others that I had no intention of offending them with any of my words. I will consider my words more carefully before I pen them in future letters. As I consider the garden.

  In appreciation of your concern,

  Your friend, Adam

  June 15, 1862

  Dear Adam,

  Sister Martha thanks you for the picture of General Grant. She has not been well and often is unable to walk. The Shakers have put wheels on a chair for her and I push her to meals and meetings, but she must stay on the lower floors. She has no fear of dying but instead welcomes the thought of stepping across the divide into heaven. She thinks she must be over 90 years old but has forgotten the year of her birth. She and a daughter came into the Shakers in 1806. The daughter left the village, but Sister Martha has faithfully followed the Shaker way in her many years here. She says I have been a gift to her, but even more she is a gift to me as I accustom myself to this new life after losing my place at Grayson.

  Sister Latisha has heard that many of our people there are gone, either sold to the south by Selena or they have run away to the north. I hope they all ran away. Father would not like to hear me say that, but he has been blinded by his obsession with Selena. Besides he hears me say nothing. I have not spoken to him since I came to Harmony Hill. I am beginning not to care so much. Although I do long to walk again in the garden as I did before I came here.