Bobby's Girl

by Catrin Collier

  She looked at him. ‘Bobby was the second man I made love to. Your brother was the first. You were the third and last …’

  ‘Penny, I’ve never asked you any personal questions about your love life because I have no right to. I love you. Your past doesn’t concern me and frankly is none of my business.’

  ‘Kate used to say my morality was out of the dark ages. It probably goes back to my upbringing, not that either of my parents ever looked down on unmarried mothers. In fact, my mother told me once that she was pregnant before she married.’

  ‘You’re kidding.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘But your parents—’

  ‘Weren’t always upright members of the community. I’ve thought a great deal about the Sixties. Kate used to say the pill emancipated women. That, for the first time in history, we could behave the way that men had for centuries and sleep around with a different boy every night if we chose to. I don’t think it was like that for most girls. I believe we were simply the first generation of women to sleep openly outside of marriage with our boyfriends. What worries me about Andrew is most girls now seem to think no more of having full sex with a boy they’ve just met and moving on to another than we did of exchanging kisses with boys when I was young.’

  ‘You sound a hundred and ten years old,’ he teased.

  ‘There are days when I feel a hundred and ten.’

  ‘Promise me you won’t lecture Andy about girls. You brought him up to think for himself. He’s a sensible lad. He’ll make the right choices.’

  ‘I wish I was as convinced as you.’

  ‘You’re worried he’ll make the same mistakes you did?’ he asked perceptively.

  ‘In what way?’

  ‘I know you, Pen. You wouldn’t have slept with Bobby if you thought he wasn’t serious about you.’

  ‘I admit, I didn’t know Bobby well in the early stages of our relationship – that came later – but I knew I loved him and I knew he cared for me. I didn’t love him any the less later, when I discovered his faults. If anything I loved him more because of them. He’d been given everything money could buy except love and affection. If I excused his shortcomings, it was because of the things he confided about his childhood. What I’m not sure is how much I should tell Andy.’

  ‘In what way?’

  ‘If I tell him about Bobby and me, will it encourage him to be as wild as his father was? If he accepts the inheritance, he’ll have enough money to do whatever he wants. Will it go to his head?’

  ‘No one can answer those questions, Pen,’ he said seriously.

  ‘You know how everyone has one special summer in their life. Well, for me, until it ended in the car crash, it was that one. We had to work hard but we played hard too, and we had the Brosna toys.’

  ‘Toys?’ he was bemused.

  ‘The Brosna Estate; it had a mansion that we dared not go near, twelve guest houses the caretaker, George, filled with homeless people, a two-bedroomed Beach House where Bobby, Sandy, Kate and me lived. There was the largest swimming pool I’d ever seen. George kept it immaculate. And we had the Brosna private beach and the Brosna yacht, Day Dream. For the first month we lived there, Bobby, Sandy, Kate and me used to wangle the same day off and go sailing or driving around the Cape together. Then Cosmo – he owned the restaurant we worked in – said the schedules wouldn’t allow it. Cosmo was lying; Bobby told me afterwards that he’d asked Cosmo to give us a different day off to Sandy and Kate so we could be alone. The night before our day off we used to drop Kate and Sandy off at the Beach House and drive on to the marina and the yacht. We’d sleep on board and sail out in the morning. Just far enough to be away from everyone and everything. It was as though we were the only two people in the world.’

  She looked inward to that time and her younger self. ‘I loved the friendships we made that summer. I loved the new experiences. The cookouts, the parties, the visits to the Melody Tent to hear musicians I’d only heard on radio, but most of all I loved the times when it was only Bobby, me and the sea.’

  ‘When I fell in love with you I knew I was up against a ghost. But I didn’t know he was still alive.’ He asked the question she hadn’t answered in nineteen years. ‘What happened to end it, Penny?’

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Penny sat back and stared at the flames flickering around the coals in the fire set in the range while Jack waited patiently for her to continue.

  ‘Kate and I saved a fair sum of money that summer.’ The commonplace opening revealed she was bracing herself for what was to come. ‘We had no rent to pay and Cosmo was generous with his leftovers. Sometimes he gave us burgers and franks to take back to the Beach House or down to Marion and Joe’s. Not just enough for us, but for twenty – thirty people. A few nights he even insisted he had spare lobsters. We didn’t believe him but we took them.’

  ‘So you didn’t starve.’ It was a banal comment but she’d fallen silent again.

  ‘No.’ She looked across at him before turning back to the fire. ‘Then, Kate and I realised we had barely two weeks left before our return flight home. For all my talk of wanting to see the galleries and museums in New York and Boston, I’d only been to two in Boston. Bobby had driven me there on one of our days off. It made me all the more determined to spend my last week sightseeing in New York.

  ‘Bobby made a couple of calls and arranged to borrow an apartment from a friend in the Village who’d be away for our last week in the States. Sandy and Kate decided to go with us and we told Cosmo we were quitting.

  ‘Cosmo didn’t mind; the season was winding down and there were times when Kate and I could actually sit at the counter for ten minutes at a time instead of scurrying around like demented ants. Three days before we were due to leave the Cape, we went to work and from there on to Marion and Joe’s for a party. We didn’t get back to the Beach House until dawn. And, when we did, every light was on in the main house.’

  ‘Charlotte Brosna?’ Jack guessed.

  ‘Bobby had been optimistic about laying a false trail in Wisconsin. I found out later that Charlotte knew exactly where he was the day we reached the Cape. She’d paid people to watch him – and us.’

  ‘Who told her?’

  She shrugged. ‘Possibly one of the “snoops” Bobby had referred to. The people she’d hired to report his movements to her when he’d been younger. When I was in the hospital after the accident I heard rumours that it was a local solicitor hoping for Brosna business. Someone else suggested it could have been one of the homeless people George had housed. I never tried to find out.’

  ‘You’re very forgiving.’

  ‘More forgiving to whoever sold us out than I was to Charlotte Brosna. Presumably they desperately needed Charlotte’s money and were prepared to do whatever it took to get it. I suspect Charlotte simply enjoyed interfering in people’s lives because it gave her pleasure to exercise the power she wielded.’ She set her empty cup on the floor beside her chair. ‘Bobby saw the lights on in the main house, turned his back on them and went into the Beach House. George was waiting for us in the living room.

  ‘He said, “Your grandmother’s back, Mr Bobby, and there’s hell to pay. Everyone’s been ordered to leave the guest houses by midday.”

  ‘Bobby’s first thought was for George. “You?” he asked.

  ‘George replied that he’d been “let go.” A horrible American expression. At least the English, “you’re fired” is honest.

  ‘Bobby was furious. George’s father and grandfather had worked for the Brosnas. If anyone had a right to expect lifetime employment, it was George junior. But George took his dismissal better than Bobby. Charlotte had offered George a thousand dollars if he went quietly. A lot of money now, but even more in 1968. George told Bobby he couldn’t afford to turn it down and he’d soon find himself another job.

  ‘Bobby knew the likelihood of George finding a job that paid as much or came with halfway decent accommodation was slim, but George was insisten
t that he would be fine and Bobby should worry about himself. But George, like Sandy, knew all about Bobby’s fraught relationship with his grandmother.

  ‘George’s parting shot as he left the Beach House to pack was that Charlotte wanted to see Bobby “right away.”

  ‘Bobby’s response was his grandmother could damn well wait.

  ‘George turned back and advised caution, but Bobby was in no mood to take advice. Sandy offered to accompany Bobby to the main house. Bobby refused and stormed out without looking at me, Kate or Sandy.

  ‘Sandy tried to be philosophical. He kissed Kate and said, “It was great while it lasted. Sorry the summer had to end, sweetheart, but in my experience they always do.”

  ‘Like Sandy, Kate tried to make light of the situation; she announced she was going to pack and went into the bedroom she’d shared with Sandy. Sandy called after her and asked her to pack his things too.

  ‘I tried to be practical and suggested that if we had to get out by midday we’d better get motel rooms for the next couple of days.

  ‘Sandy said he’d borrow George’s bike after breakfast and return to Marion and Joe’s house to see if there were any empty rooms. Quite a few people had already left the Cape to spend the final days of the holidays with their families. And we only needed a place for a couple more nights.

  ‘I couldn’t bear the thought of staying on for any length of time and asked Sandy if he thought Cosmo would allow us to leave earlier than we’d arranged. Sandy said he’d talk to him, but even as we discussed it, I wasn’t thinking of galleries and museums. Only Bobby. Every minute that passed seemed like a week, and I thought it unlikely he’d return to the Beach House. I assumed the grandmother he’d spoken of so often, and never fondly, would send one of her minions to collect Bobby’s things and order us out of the Beach House. And that, as Sandy had said, would be the end of the summer – and Bobby and me.’

  She sat back in the chair but didn’t look at Jack.

  ‘We were close to the main house but didn’t have a clue what was happening there and not one of us dared knock on the door. Now it seems ridiculous that three young people well able to take care of themselves were frightened of a cantankerous selfish old woman.’

  ‘A rich powerful old woman who had total control over a grandson you all loved,’ Jack reminded. ‘Wealth brings power and I doubt many people ever stood up to Charlotte Brosna.’

  She thought of Andy and how Charlotte had tried to take him from her.

  ‘So what happened then?’ Jack prompted.

  ‘Sandy made coffee and breakfast although I don’t think any of us ate anything. After he washed the dishes, Sandy opened the front door. Shadows were moving in front of one of the windows in an upstairs room. But we were too far away to hear anything. There were so many questions I’d wanted to ask Bobby and never had. I couldn’t wait any longer and I asked Sandy why Bobby was so frightened of his grandmother.

  ‘His answer was short and to the point. “Because she’s controlled his life since the day he was born and she has all the money.”

  ‘I tried arguing with Sandy that there had to be more. We’d lived all summer on our earnings from the restaurant, which were good but not as much as Kate and I could expect to earn once we’d qualified. And we’d lived well. When Sandy pointed out that we hadn’t had to pay rent or service charges I reminded him that we’d saved more than enough to cover those expenses and had intended to travel to New York on it.

  ‘That’s when he said that I had no idea what it was like living with the kind of money the Brosnas had. What it was to have a limo at your disposal, twenty-four hours, seven days a week, and all the yachts, cars, houses and luxuries money could buy.

  ‘I asked him if he thought Bobby would give up his lifestyle for me. It was only after I asked the question I realised Bobby had already given me his answer. He’d never made me any promises about a future together.’

  ‘I love you now, isn’t that enough?’ She didn’t repeat the words to Jack; some things were too personal, even for him. But Bobby’s voice echoed through her mind.

  ‘Sandy was honest, disconcertingly so. He didn’t answer my question because he said there was no point in him telling me what I already knew. He said he was sorry, sorry about the way the summer had ended. Sorry to be leaving Kate and me, but, most of all, sorry to be losing his freedom and having to ship out to Vietnam.

  ‘He also tried to console me by telling me it was easier on him and Kate and even Bobby, than it was on me because all three of them had accepted there would only be the one summer for us from the beginning.

  ‘I said the first thing that came into my head, “You don’t think Bobby loves me?”

  ‘Sandy gave me an answer I didn’t want to hear. He reminded me that he’d known Bobby all his life and assured me, honestly and sincerely that as far as he could tell, Bobby loved me as much as he was capable of loving anyone. Before he left he suggested that if I wanted to know any more about Bobby or Bobby’s thoughts I should ask Bobby, not him.

  ‘I went into the bedroom I’d shared with Bobby, packed my things and tidied up Bobby’s clothes. I showered and changed into a clean shirt and jeans. When I’d done all I could, I knocked on the door of Kate and Sandy’s room. Kate was lying dressed on the bed. Her own and Sandy’s bags and her haggis were packed on the floor beside her.

  ‘She looked at me and said, “We can’t do anything until Sandy gets back so we may as well sleep.”

  ‘I lay beside her. Two hours later Sandy returned. He told us two rooms would be vacant in Marion and Joe’s house from four o’clock that afternoon and he’d taken them for the night. He also warned us that the landlady was a stickler for propriety and he’d taken one room for himself and another for Kate and me.

  ‘The landlady must have either never gone near the place or been blind because everyone in that house was sharing a room with a girl or boyfriend. Joe and Marion had also agreed we could drop our cases into their room before we worked our shift.

  ‘Sandy had returned George’s bike and suggested we call a cab. There was no sign of Bobby and we could hardly take his car without his permission. The homeless people had started moving out of the guest houses at eight. Most, including Mary and Paul, called in the Beach House to say goodbye on their way.

  ‘Not one of the three of us had the courage to ask them, or George, where they were going. The cab came at midday and Sandy was helping the driver load our bags into it when Bobby finally emerged from the main house. He grabbed my arm, took me to one side and asked me to stay.

  ‘At first I said I couldn’t. That we were moving our things into Marion and Joe’s place and we had to work.

  ‘Sandy reminded him we owed Cosmo and couldn’t let him down. Not after he’d given us jobs when we’d needed them. Bobby continued to plead with me and my resistance crumbled.

  ‘I handed my duffel bag, which held my uniform, waitressing shoes and apron, to Kate and told her and Sandy I’d see them at the restaurant at the beginning of our shift.

  ‘Bobby waited until Kate and Sandy left in the cab before telling me that his grandmother wanted to see me. He also warned me that the meeting wouldn’t be pleasant. An understatement if ever there was one.

  ‘I asked him if she disapproved of me.

  ‘He looked up at the main house and I knew Charlotte Brosna was watching every move Bobby made. He said, “She disapproves of everyone, Penny. She’s given me an hour to talk to you first. Can we walk on the beach?”

  ‘I don’t know what the weather on Cape Cod is usually like in the summer because I’ve only been there that once. The summer of 1968 was certainly glorious. But walking on the beach with Bobby that early September morning I felt an autumn chill in the air. The sun shone as bright as it had in July but it was as though someone had turned down the temperature. The sea, the scenery were still beautiful, still idyllic and I recall trying to imprint every view, every sensation on my mind so it could become a memory I could ref
er to later. Even then, I sensed that one day I’d want to relive even the unhappy moments I’d spent with Bobby.

  ‘For a while we just walked along the shoreline, avoiding the debris. The broken fishing lines, the dead crabs, the shells. We kicked up sand with our bare toes because we’d taken off our shoes. I didn’t want to be the one to begin the conversation because I didn’t want to be seen as too clinging – too needy.

  ‘Finally Bobby said, “I love you.” It was the declaration I’d been waiting for all summer, but the way he said it made my blood run cold.’

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  Pontypridd, 1987

  A cloudburst of rain thundered down, smashing against the farmhouse windows in a staccato drumbeat. Although it was only five o’clock, the light that filtered through the deep-set windows had darkened to twilight grey.

  Jack left his chair and switched on the side lamps. ‘If your parents don’t see the lights on in your house they’ll be worried. Phone them and tell them you’re staying over. I’ll open a bottle of wine and you can help me eat my cottage pie.’

  ‘It’s tempting but I should go back.’

  ‘With Andy away you’ve no reason.’

  ‘Except work,’ she demurred.

  ‘If you were able to concentrate on your painting you wouldn’t be here.’

  She went into the hall, picked up the phone and spoke to her mother. As she’d expected, her father had told her mother about the letter she’d received from America.

  ‘Andy’s only eighteen, darling. To inherit a fortune at that age—’

  ‘I know it’s not going to be easy for him,’ she interrupted. The last thing she wanted to do was discuss the implications of her son inheriting the Brosna fortune over the telephone. ‘I promise you, I won’t do anything without talking it over with you and Daddy first. He did tell you that I don’t want Andy to know about it until after his exams?’