Fallout

by Lila Rose

  I loved him in high school, but did I love him now?

  Butterflies took flight in my belly, and my hands shook with the realisation.

  Yes. I loved him. How could I not? He’d stayed in my heart, locked away tight since the day I met him. He was my Jerimiah.

  What I couldn’t understand fully was how could he care for me when I’d dropped trouble right into his and his family’s life? Still, he did. Jerimiah cared for me.

  Hell, we hadn’t even kissed, yet I loved him again.

  Jerimiah could totally suck at kissing. He could be a guy who slobbered all over a woman’s face. He could also hold a woman wrong, like… their head at an odd angle while he tortured their mouths with his lips and tongue.

  His sexy kissable lips.

  I quickly took a sip of the wine that Manda had ordered to stop myself daydreaming about having those lips on me. How he’d trail sweet little kisses all over my body while I lay back on the bed, begging for more…. Fuck. Looking at lips led me straight into bedroom thoughts. That wasn’t good.

  “Watcha thinkin’, darlin’?” My body jolted when his warm breath brushed the back of my neck, just behind my ear. I sank my teeth into my bottom lip to stop the moan. “Baby, you’re burning up. I’d love to know what’s on your mind that has you so hot and bothered.”

  Jesus. I knew my face, and probably neck, were matching my hair, but being around the stupid, sexy man wasn’t good for me.

  Wait, why was I holding back again?

  Oh, that was right. Python. Somehow, I had to get rid of him and out of my life for good, and then I could move on. I need to make sure my troubles didn’t follow me and cause more damage than they already had.

  Then there was also what I needed to share about Switch.

  But Python was my main problem. It could have been Jerimiah in intensive care.

  I was already struggling to forgive myself for the attack on Elvis, but if it had been Jerimiah… I wouldn’t be able to live with it.

  I had to make sure everything was sorted before I moved forward with Jerimiah. If not, I would lose myself as soon as he touched me, well, in a way that wasn’t teasing. Like he was right then, with his hand circling my lower back.

  “Yo,” I heard, so I turned away from Jerimiah’s warm breath fanning my neck, sending shivers through my body, to try and look over Jerimiah’s shoulder. Only he didn’t move an inch. He just sighed long and loud.

  He straightened and shifted. Then I saw Nary standing there. My stomach twisted. Beside her was a good-looking guy who had his arm around her shoulders. My eyes widened a fraction. He must be the guy she’d left Jerimiah for. Yes, he was good-looking, in a rough type of biker way, but he had nothing on Jerimiah.

  “Hi, I’m Nary, and this is Saxon or as his brothers call him, Vicious,” she said, looking right at me with a nice smile on her lips. She was pretty… no, gorgeous, even with the scar on the side of her face. Her man leaned into her and kissed her scar. Her smile widened as she looked up at him with adoration in her eyes.

  They were totally in love with one another.

  I shot a glance at Jerimiah to see if it was bothering him, seeing them together, but it wasn’t. In fact, he was fighting his own smile as he watched them.

  When Nary’s eyes came back to me, I thrust my hand out, and said, “Hi, I’m Poppy. Nice to meet you both.” I’d seen Vicious sitting out the front of my place, protecting me when Charlie or Jerimiah couldn’t. I just didn’t know who he was to Nary.

  She took my hand, then squeezed once. Only it wasn’t in a bitchy way. That told me she didn’t mind me being around Jerimiah. If anything, it was friendly. “It’s great to finally meet you,” she said.

  My head jerked back in shock. Finally meet me? Just what had she heard? Everything? Bringing trouble to the club?

  She laughed. “Don’t worry, I don’t know much. All Saxon told me was that a person from Fang’s life was back in it, and that you seemed to have gotten his knickers in a twist.” Her eyes widened. “But in a good way,” she quickly added, giggling.

  Oh, well, that was a relief. I guess. At least I found myself smiling.

  Jerimiah groaned, palmed his forehead, and reached out to smack the back of Vicious’s head, who in return gave him a dirty look.

  “And about that guy not leaving you alone,” she mentioned.

  “I’m sorry,” I blurted. Jerimiah got closer, and his hand slid to the back of my neck.

  Her brows shot up. “Sorry about what?”

  “Everything that’s happened since… just everything.” I dipped my chin.

  “Poppy,” Nary called quietly. I lifted my face. “One day I’ll tell you my full story. For now, you need to know it’s not your fault. None of it’s your fault. Don’t worry about Hawks. They’re strong. I promise you they are, and they wouldn’t fight if they didn’t believe in what they’re fighting for.”

  Moving my gaze from Nary to her man, to Jerimiah, I noticed they all agreed with Nary. Vicious with his chin lift, and Jerimiah with his warm smile. But didn’t they understand I wasn’t Hawks?

  “But… I’m not a member of—”

  “Don’t say it,” Jerimiah clipped with another squeeze to my neck. “You’re a part of my life, and I’m Hawks.”

  Nary giggled. “You’ll learn once a brother makes up his mind, there’s no going back.”

  Rolling my eyes, I smiled. “Are they always so annoying?”

  She laughed outright. “Yes.”

  “Angel, how about you leave the girl talk when your man and his brothers aren’t around? We gotta get goin’ anyway.”

  “Right.” Nary nodded. “Listen, I’m sure the Hawks women would love to meet you—”

  “Why?” I asked, my voice unnaturally high. It gained Manda’s attention away from Muff.

  Nary grinned, and ignoring my question, she said, “We do have to go, but I’ll get your number off Jerimiah and we’ll organise a get-together.”

  Why was I suddenly scared?

  Usually women and I didn’t mix. Manda was my one and only girlfriend because other women were bitches. Still, I had a feeling Nary and her friends would be different. At least I hoped.

  “Can Manda come along?” She was like my security blanket who could talk to anyone. So if I messed up in any way, I knew Manda would help dissolve any issues.

  Jerimiah’s hand slid from my neck to my shoulder, and he leaned in to press his lips to my temple. My stomach dipped as if it was on a roller coaster. He liked my agreeing, and I liked that it had made him happy.

  “Sure. We’d love that.” She smiled at Manda. “I’m Nary.”

  I saw it then, the smile Nary produced, a sweet, kind one. One without a trace of fake in it at all, and it won Manda over instantly. “Manda, Poppy’s best friend, and we’d love to get together. Can you teach me to be a badarse biker babe?” she asked.

  Nary laughed. “I could try.” She looked back to me. “Talk soon.”

  Vicious gave us all another chin lift in farewell, while Jerimiah who glared at him, and Muff smiled, returning his gesture. Pure biker language.

  “I have to go to the ladies’ room,” Manda announced, then stood and grabbed my wrist. “She’s coming with me.”

  Jerimiah smirked, then took a pull from his beer.

  “Do women have a secret meeting place in there? Youse always go in pairs,” Muff commented. “Wait, do you watch each other piss? Is this why?”

  Snorting, I shook my head. “It’s so we can talk about guys without you two overhearing.”

  His head jerked back. “Seriously? Why don’t you tell us to get lost for a while and then do it here?”

  Manda scoffed. “Ah, there are bikers everywhere. I’m sure they’d tell you what was said.”

  His eyes narrowed before he grinned. “Is this because you like me? I’m s
ingle, babe. No need to run off and ask your girl there. Not that she’d know. She’s new to the club.”

  “I’m not in the club,” I said without thinking; actually, it was automatic.

  “You are,” Jerimiah stated, his tone low and growly.

  “Oh my.” Manda sighed, and from the far-off dazed look in her eyes, she was probably picturing Jerimiah growling over her in bed.

  “Hey,” I snapped, and clicked my fingers in front of her face. She shook her head and met my gaze. “Not yours.”

  Shit damn. I stiffened when I heard a throaty chuckle.

  “Then whose am I, Poppy?” Jerimiah purred. At least I’d call it a purr because it was sultry and deep.

  Ignoring him, I squeaked out, “Bathroom.” Then I led Manda away with me.

  Once inside, I glanced under the doors of the cubicles to make sure no one was in there. After all, I was in a Hawks pub. Any of their babes could be in the room and listening. When I saw no feet, I spun to Manda and ran a hand over my face, sighing. “What am I doing?”

  “Getting what you want.” Manda smiled.

  “Remind me again. What do I want?”

  “Fang in your arms, bed, and body. His delicious dark eyes haven’t strayed from you since we arrived. God, I’m becoming horny from just watching him.”

  “Manda!”

  Her hands went up in front of her. “What? It’s not like I’d do anything.” She stepped up to me, placing her hands on my shoulders. Then she shook the heck out of me.

  “What are you doing?” I slapped at her arms.

  “Shaking some sense into you. I’d slap you, but you’re my best friend and I just can’t.”

  “You can stop now,” I replied.

  “Okay. Now, are you going to go out there and kiss the living shit out of your hunk?”

  Biting my bottom lip, I shook my head. Manda swore and started reaching for me again. I backed up.

  “Wait, I have an excuse.”

  “Oh, this had better be good. You two have been texting each other for over a month. I’ve seen some of the texts.” I glared. “Well, your phone was just lying there while you got ready. Anyway, my point is, the texts I read were pure flirtation. You two are hot for one another. You have been your whole life.”

  “I haven’t told him about Switch.”

  “Fuck,” she whispered. Manda knew everything, and I meant everything. Before she came back to Caroline Springs, I filled her in on Jerimiah and me. How he wanted more from me and how hesitant I was because of Python. She told me I was crazy of course. Though I just hadn’t mentioned to Manda I’d been putting off telling Jerimiah how his father drove me out of town. At first, I hadn’t wanted to leave, but then Blackie had advised it because it would also protect Jerimiah.

  Manda shook her head. “Doesn’t matter. He won’t care… in the end, and then you both can get the grind on.” She thrust her hips back and forth. Then stopped. “Seriously, Poppy. Your man is a goner for you. I can’t see the news of Switch fucking it up between you two.”

  “Jerimiah told me… he said, he thought I could have been his forever. Even back when we were in high school. I don’t want to rush this if we’re each other’s future forever.”

  Her expression softened. “Honey, how could it be rushing when really you’ve both been in love with each other for like a billion years already?”

  I snorted. “I didn’t love him until grade ten at least, and then I left at the end of the year.”

  Manda raised her brows at me and crossed her arms over her chest.

  “I didn’t.”

  She rolled her eyes.

  Throwing my hands up, I then let them fall to my sides, and said, “Okay, maybe I was a little in like with him, but it wasn’t love.”

  “Sure. Okay, uh-huh. We’ll talk about that lie later. What you need to do now is have private time with your man and tell him the final piece of the puzzle.”

  Shifting my gaze to the mirror, I could see the bruise under my make-up. “What happens when Python comes back and harms more people in Jerimiah’s life?”

  Manda stepped in front of me. “Can’t you see by now he doesn’t care about the danger? Even his brothers don’t care. What they care about is keeping you safe… for Fang. They’d take on the world for you because of him, and Fang would do anything, risk anything, to have you at his side.”

  I closed my eyes to hold back the tears. She was right, but maybe I just couldn’t understand the why of it. What made me so special to have Jerimiah’s love? For all of them to have my back in this situation? Sucking in a deep breath, I opened my eyes and nodded.

  If they saw worth in me, then the only thing I could do was cherish it, appreciate it, and take care of what they were offering. A new family. With the man I had always loved.

  Manda took my hands and beamed a bright smile right at me. “Yay, let’s get out there so you can claim what’s yours, and I’ll keep that lush Muff occupied while you do it.” She clapped and spun towards the door.

  Quickly, I grabbed her arm. “Manda, you’ve just moved back. I’m not sure Muff is the type of guy for you. I heard he gets around a lot.”

  She giggled. “Honey, I’m not looking to date, but a little flirting and heavy petting won’t go astray. Hell, I might even add in dry humping he’s just that fine.”

  Scoffing, I shook my head at my best friend, but I did it smiling. God, I’d missed having her around. We’d kept in contact when I’d left and never stopped. However, contact through emails, texts, and phone calls just hadn’t been the same. To have her with me, and in the flesh, was amazing.

  We waded our way through the people back to the bar where Jerimiah was having intense words with Muff. When he saw us approaching, he said something quickly and then stepped back.

  Poor Muff looked like a lost little puppy when he eyed Manda as she sat back in her seat.

  “Sorry about that, took longer than it should have. Muff, would you care to dance?”

  Muff’s eyes popped wide. He glanced from Jerimiah and then back to Manda. His jaw clenched. “Baby, I don’t dance, but I could come watch you shake it and keep the other fuckers away.”

  Manda smiled. “Sounds great to me.”

  “Muff,” Jerimiah warned low.

  “Cool it, brother. I ain’t a dick. When a lady asks me, I won’t deny her.”

  They walked off towards the dance floor. I choked on a sip of my wine when Manda started grinding her hips around and around, while running her hands all over her body. Muff’s gaze heated, until he looked back to Jerimiah. Muff quickly schooled his features and then stood there with his legs planted apart and his arms crossed over his chest. When another guy started to get close to Manda, Muff barked at them to back off. The way his face screwed up would scare many, so it was no surprise when the guy fled.

  Since Jerimiah was still watching Muff, no doubt because he’d warned his brother away from Manda and that was probably because he was worried about me in a roundabout way, I reached up and laid my hand on his chest.

  His eyes swung down to me. Grinning, I said, “Don’t worry about Manda. She can take care of herself. Besides, I’ve already told her to stay away from Muff. I’d heard he was a player, but the look on her face said she didn’t care at all.”

  “If he fucks her over—”

  “It won’t be an issue between us. They’re grown-ups. They can handle it.”

  He studied my face to see how serious I was. Jerimiah nodded, lifted his head and shifted his gaze over to his brother. Turning, I watched first Jerimiah nod at Muff, then Muff’s bright smile before he moved in and wrapped his arms around Manda, pulling her close and swaying with her.

  “Darlin’,” Jerimiah’s voice was soft, his eyes were just as soft, “I’m gonna kiss you now.”

  My body jolted. “What? Why?”

 
He chuckled. “Because I want to, and you want me to.”

  Glaring, I said, “You’re very sure of yourself.”

  “Yeah.” He winked.

  “Then maybe next time you shouldn’t tell me and freak me out, just do it.”

  He shifted closer, grabbed my knees and widened them so he could step between them.

  I forgot how to breathe.

  “I’ll have to remember you prefer sneak attacks.” He grinned, and it was totally cocky.

  “Jerimiah, I—” Movement caught my attention, and I froze. My eyes widened when they landed on who it was.

  No, no, no. Not here. Not now.

  Oh God… Oh God…. I watched as he raised his hand and pointed his finger at the back of Jerimiah’s head. He motioned his fingers like a gun. His lips moved, and I knew what he’d mouthed.

  Bang.

  Python was in the Hawks MC bar and threatening to shoot Jerimiah. Terror clutched at my heart. He’d already done enough. Couldn’t he just leave me alone?

  In a blink, he disappeared, but I got his message. I got it.

  He didn’t want me around the Hawks. Especially Jerimiah or he’d kill them.

  “Poppy!” Jerimiah’s hands landed on my face. “Darlin’, what is it?”

  Frantically, my eyes roamed over his face. I couldn’t lose him.

  Not when I’d just got him back.

  “Poppy?”

  “What’s going on?” Manda asked from beside us.

  “Brother?” Muff said.

  “Tell me, darlin’,” Jerimiah pressed.

  He needed to protect himself. Concentrate on him, his family, and not me.

  The thought that there was a chance of losing him hacked at my heart and soul.

  “H-he was just here,” I whispered.

  Jerimiah straightened to his full height. He moved this and that way, looking to find him. “Fuck,” he snarled. “Christ. He was here, in Pick’s bar, on Hawks territory.” He gripped my wrist and pulled me off my seat. “Can you still see him?”

  “No. He’s gone.”

  “Shit, okay.” He nodded. “Pick,” he called. “Keys, office.”

  “You good?” I heard him ask.