Tempted by a Sinner (Seven Sinners Book 4)
Page 17
He’d pressed it into my hands with tears in his eyes, and I just couldn’t fucking keep it. Looking at that picture had been the equivalent of shoving a cattle iron into a raw, infected wound.
Naomi sighed. “I wish I could say I was mature enough back then to come to my senses and realize how precious a gift it was, but I wasn’t. The only reason I didn’t toss it was because I was so freaking pissed off that I shoved it in my purse and forgot all about it.”
“Maybe a year later.” She tapped her chin in thought. “I found it in the back of my closet. When I did, it was like all the things she said that day came back to me, except this time I could actually listen. Holding it in my palm, I could feel her there with me, talking in soft tones, urging me to keep looking towards the next day instead of dwelling in the shadows of the current one. Whenever I need a reminder, I put it on.”
“What kind of reminder?” I asked.
Then the strangest thing happened.
Eyes still puffy with tears, Naomi smiled. The sadness on her face vanished like it was never there to begin with. “The kind that tells me that, even though she’s gone, a piece of her will always live on inside me. A reminder to honor her memory every second of every day. She would kick me in the butt if I lost out on laughter and happiness and joy for the sake of grieving.”
My blood froze as I considered what she was saying, and something in my soul clicked.
All this time.
All these years.
I called myself keeping to the letter of the promise I made to Katherine. But I never picked apart just how shallow my understanding was of what she actually asked of me.
Yeah, she told me to keep on living.
Except there was more to it than that. So much more.
What Matthias said the night before came back to me.
Instead of fulfilling her promise, I traded one sacrifice for another.
In an effort to keep going by any means necessary, I turned myself into a martyr instead of a person without even noticing. Acting for others instead of myself. Calling it purpose instead of what it really was.
Cowardice.
My frozen blood suddenly boiled, and not with anger.
Shame coated my insides with oily slickness, making my stomach pitch sideways.
“Are you okay?” Naomi sat up so she could get a closer look at me.
I couldn’t answer her.
How fucking dare I spend the time Katherine had never gotten in this twilight state halfway between living and dead? I didn’t have to wonder if she would kick my ass for what I’d done.
I already knew that if she were here in this moment, she would’ve slapped me across the fucking face for being a complete and utter fool.
“Slap me,” I said suddenly, voice tight.
Naomi blinked, tilting her head. “Come again?”
I took a breath deep enough to lift her body weight. “You’ve probably wanted to at least once anyway. Slap me. Consider it a freebie.”
“I won’t,” she said.
My jaw clenched, followed by my fists.
Was I going to beg? For this?
Was it not any less than I deserved?
“Plea-”
Soft lips pressed against mine, shutting me down instantly. My eyes closed and I pulled her into my lap, wrapping my arms around her while bony fingers shoved themselves deep into my chest from behind.
For the first time, my grief was able to reach me while I wasn’t standing in that spot between the pines.
And I let it.
I’d severed myself from most of my emotions, and considered it an achievement instead of a horrible mistake.
No more, I thought, kissing the girl in my arms as hard as I could. I would owe her for this. It was a debt I didn’t know how I could possibly repay. But I would.
Unlike before, there was time.
She moaned into my mouth, and the drum of my heart pounded with the sound of arousal and something stronger. I was tempted to pull her robe apart, jerk down my sweatpants, and slide inside of her right there.
She was ready.
I felt her heat against me with each slow rock of her hips.
Except doing so would’ve meant hiding from the storm boiling inside of me, and I’d spent enough time doing that.
I broke the kiss, trailing my lips down her chin and then back up. “Let me walk you home.”
My eyes opened hesitantly, unsure what kind of expression I would find waiting for me. She looked confused. A little bit hurt. A lot curious. Like she knew there was something going on here I wasn’t telling her.
Lord fucking knows there was.
That was another thing I owed her: an explanation.
She nodded before climbing from my lap. I adjusted her robe, pressing my lips to the top of her head. Then I looked at the robe again, cursing under my breath.
“One sec.” I went to the hallway closet, grabbing two coats. One went over my shoulders, and the other swallowed her from almost head to toe. The bottom of it might drag on the ground when she walked. It was perfect.
“You’re doing that thing again,” she said, lips curving. “Where you get kind of...possessive.”
“Is that a problem, Smoothie Girl?”
Her lips parted, a full grin forming. For a change, she didn’t give me any attitude after asking a question. Only blunt honesty. “Not even a little bit.”
Chapter Sixteen
Naomi
My phone chirped in my pocket while I was in the back opening boxes Monday morning. The cups with my mom’s design had been delivered first thing—all gazillion of them.
Maybe not that many, but it sure felt like it. Running out of shelf space was about to be a real concern. But that was better than using the boring styrofoam cups any longer. I grabbed my phone, a slow smile spreading when I looked at the screen.
Tone: What have you done to me? I woke up at six in the morning two days in a row now. I even made my own smoothies with the blender and spinach you ‘somehow’ managed to leave behind.
I laughed softly, reading his words twice.
After finding his number tucked beneath the windshield wiper on my car—following the slightly awkward I spilled my guts and he was the one who ended up looking tortured incident—we had been texting nonstop over the course of the weekend.
Didn’t stop me from getting a kick out of the way he typed without using any abbreviations. Still smiling, my fingers flew over the keyboard.
Me: So that’s where my other blender got to. You would never believe it, but I’ve been looking all over the place.
Tone: You might be the worst liar I’ve ever met.
Me: How would you know? Maybe my lies are also lies to cover up a tall, sweeping pyramid of deception.
My grin slipped. There was something I hadn’t exactly been forthcoming about, but he didn’t really need to know, did he? It wasn’t like there were kids on the horizon.
I’d already taken steps to renew my birth control.
Although adjusting my insulin to account for it was going to be a pain in the butt.
Good thing I only had to imagine feeling everything I’d felt the other night, with nothing between us, to convince me it was worth it.
So, so worth it.
My body clenched around nothing and I bit my lip, using the pinch of pain to banish the vision of him pushing inside my tight walls completely bare.
Tone: Get back to work before I spank you again.
Heat curled through me, my body remembering the expert way he had handled it.
I loved how he had smacked my ass until it was red and throbbing. How he had climbed behind me and gripped my hips, pounding inside me with abandon. I couldn’t recall the last time I felt quite so unbreakable.
Me: Is that a threat? Because I feel a sudden urge to stop being productive.
He didn’t respond right away.
I dug my nails into the tape of another box before tearing it open. The slightest sound reached my
ears and I paused, listening.
Nothing.
Then my phone lit up again.
Tone: Don’t make plans tonight, Smoothie Girl. Once you get done, you’re mine for the rest of the day.
His.
A pleasant warmth filled my chest, wrapping my heart in fuzzy blankets. The demand I could practically hear had me curling my toes with excitement. I sent back a thinking emoji just because I knew it would aggravate him.
Tap tap tap.
There it was again.
I slid my phone back into my pocket and stood. It sounded like someone was knocking against the glass at the front of the shop. My first thought was, Great. Now I need window cleaner.
And I didn’t open for nearly an hour, so why was someone outside?
I thought about pretending I wasn’t here, but my car was in plain sight. Not to mention that would be completely rude. Sighing, I pasted a customer service smile on my face and headed towards the front.
Sure enough, there was a man pressed against the glass of the front door, fist poised like he was about to knock again when he spotted me. I knew right away he wasn’t one of my customers, even though something about him stood out as familiar.
The suit, wool coat, and olive skin reminded me of the blonde from the Sinner’s party. Was he one of the bodyguards or whatever I saw flanking the other guy? I wasn’t sure.
But he had dark hair and a pair of mirrored shades on that reflected my approach.
Which was freaking weird and obnoxious seeing as how there was a good while before the sun came up.
He offered up a grin that—a week and a half ago—I would’ve found roguish and fitting on his admittedly handsome face. Now? I was blind to it.
Tone’s camera flash smiles were to blame.
“Can I help you?” My hands met in the front pocket of my oversized hoodie. I thought I sounded fairly normal, given what I really wanted to say was, Get your hands off my glass you prick.
“I certainly hope so,” he said, chuckling like there was some joke in his words. “I managed to get a bit turned around, and my phone died. Do you think you could give me some directions?”
Did he think this was still the nineties?
I pulled my phone out and held it up. “What’s the address? I can try and look it up for you, but I don’t know where anything is otherwise.”
“About that...I only saved the address in my GPS.”
“Street name?”
“I’ve got nothing. You think I could borrow your phone for a minute and look at the map?”
I blinked, glancing at him. Being sheltered for several years didn’t make me stupid. Tone sneaking up on me was enough of a wake-up call to keep me vigilant.
He held his grin in place. “Promise I’ll be quick.”
The hairs on the back of my neck lifted. I tried to think of the nicest way to say that wasn’t getting ready to happen, but it turned out I didn’t have to.
Something red and bright hit the front of the man’s coat and he stood up suddenly, batting at the fabric to dislodge glowing cigarette embers. He looked up with his jaw set tight, and I followed his stare to find Tone’s friend, Axle, lazily striding into view with his hands in his pockets.
I was surprised to see the grumpy tattoo artist, and not just because his bike was nowhere to be seen.
The sum of our interaction occurred when I came through yesterday. Tone tried to tell me Axle wasn’t really a people person. A gross understatement if you asked me.
There was not being a people person, and there was grunting at people when they introduced themselves and literally not saying a word.
“Shitdick number two,” Axle said by way of greeting.
Looking through the glass at them reminded me of a museum exhibit. Too bad there was no popcorn. The man I could now vaguely place as being in Asher’s orbit at the party leveled a hard glare on Axle, who showed nothing in his cold, blue eyes other than icy disdain.
“That was out of line,” Shitdick said.
What? I didn’t know the guy’s name.
Axle lit another cigarette and took a drag. “Your face will be out of line next if you don't fuck off somewhere other than here.”
“This is a free country.”
“I don’t give a damn.” He blew smoke that danced in the air. “In this town, nothing is free. And your lying ass doesn’t even need directions.”
I narrowed my eyes at Axle. Had he been somewhere next door listening?
Shitdick smiled, spreading his arms. “What else would I be here for?”
“Again. I don’t give a damn. You want to stand in the cold and freeze your fucking balls off? Be my guest. Almost nothing would make me happier. But do it somewhere else.”
“Maybe I want to do it here, Sinner.”
Axle flipped him the middle finger. “She’s Marked.”
I frowned. There was that word again. But he wasn’t done.
“There are plenty of women in this town who aren’t,” he said. “Find one and get the fuck off my sidewalk.”
Shitdick shook his head. “Such vulgar thugs. I’ll be glad to put this hellhole behind me.” He glanced at me with a smile, shades hiding his expression. “Ciao bella.”
I said nothing, because eww.
Axle and I watched him walk away and climb into an expensive-looking Porsche.
“Thanks,” I said once the car disappeared down the street.
“Don’t fucking talk to strangers,” Axle snapped, turning his glare on me.
I frowned at him. “Do you have any setting other than incredibly rude? I haven’t done anything to deserve the attitude.”
“You’ve done plenty.” He spat his cigarette on the ground and turned, walking away.
I opened my door and stepped out into the cold fast enough to catch his arm and turn him back around. “Wait. What’s the deal with this Marked thing? Texas said something similar before.”
Axle stared at the hand on his arm for so long I glanced at it myself. Was there dirt under my nails or something? Then he jerked completely out of my grip.
“I don’t have to explain shit to you, woman. You’re not one of us.”
“I’m not asking to join your silly little boys’ club. I just want an explanation since you obviously have terms for us normal people.”
He made me wait while he grabbed another cigarette and lit it. I took a step back, not wanting to smell the pungent odor. I wasn’t surprised when he rolled his eyes mockingly.
“It means you’ve been declared off-limits, alright? That clear enough for ya? I didn’t decide that shit, so you’ll have to take it up with my boy.”
“Tone marked me?”
“You see any other guys sniffing around you? Christ.”
I thought about the party again. The way—shortly after I lost sight of Tone—everyone had given me a wide berth and kept from bothering me. This was why?
He’d decided I was going to be his back then?
I knew I should’ve probably been annoyed by the overbearing attitude. But if I was being honest, it was kind of awesome.
“Get back inside,” Axle grumbled, blowing smoke my direction.
My fingers twitched to wave it away, but my petty side stopped me. “Do you not like me or something?”
Why was I pushing him on this? It wasn’t like we were going to become close. But an end to the hostility would be nice, considering I was planning on being in this spot—right beside his—for a good long while.
“You mean nothing to me,” he said honestly.
“Wow.”
“If you cry, I swear to fucking God...”
At that, I laughed. He only looked more annoyed. “You think I’m going to cry because you don’t like me? I couldn’t care less.”
He was quiet for a moment, eyes narrowing on me. Eventually, he nodded and turned away again. “Great. Good talk.” Axle slammed the door behind him, hard enough the glass rattled.
I went back in my shop and locked the door, fe
eling more than a little confused.
What a strange way to start the morning.
***
“You’ve had all day to come up with something and this is what you chose?” I hoped every bit of surprise I felt was evident in my voice.
“Come on,” Tone said, huge hand on my back steering me forward. “You can act funny about it as much as you want, but you’re forgetting I felt the way you squeezed me mad tight when the Ferris wheel came into view.”
Damn. He did notice.
I schooled my expression before he caught my grin too, letting my eyes roam. There was so much to see I didn’t even know where to start. I couldn’t believe Oakdale even had something like this.
And how in the heck had I not heard anything about it?
When I got in from work earlier, Tone had been idling on his bike in my driveway. Rushing me to get ready and to dress for comfort. I took the fastest shower of my life before throwing on some boots, jeans and a sweater I didn’t mind getting dirty. It was a good thing too, because the field we were in was mostly straw and dirt instead of actual grass.
I didn’t mind.
How could I?
For all my guessing while I was getting dressed, and during the ride here, this was easily the last thing I would’ve ever predicted.
Somehow, someway, Tone had found an actual fair.
There was cotton candy and junk food galore, registering to my senses like the ultimate temptation. Bumper cars. String lights hanging up and down the rows upon rows of vendors, blazing against the night sky. I was pretty sure there was even a petting zoo somewhere. It certainly smelled like there was.
Swear to God, if I got a chance to pet a freaking pig, I was going to marry this man.
“Your face says it all.” Tone sounded pleased with himself. The smug look on his face confirmed as much when I glanced at him from beneath my lashes. “I outdid myself this time. Don’t try and pout now, Smoothie Girl, it’s too late. Already caught you looking like a kid who just walked into a candy store.”
Channeling the classy, mature adult that I was, I stuck my tongue out at him instead of confirming how right he was.
We got in line for food and I looked around again, taking it in. There were tons of people wandering around. Laughing. Chatting. Having an absolute blast of a time. After letting my eyes wander some more, I finally realized what else stood out.