by Hilary Wynne
“Oh look, Julian. Someone is about to get married. This is so awesome. It’s like when you proposed to me in Sanibel. Love is in the air.” I squeeze his hand and smile. From the distance I can see a soft white tent billowing in the breeze. There are several tiki torches flickering in the dusk and I think I can make out chandeliers hanging from the palm trees. I also hear the soft sounds of an acoustic guitar melding with the sounds of the sea and the breeze to make an almost otherworldly sound. I feel drawn to it, but know I shouldn’t be intruding. I turn to walk the other way, but Julian grasps my hand firmly and keeps walking toward the dock. My focus snaps back to him as I feel his hand begin to tremble in mine. I also hear his breathing become a little deeper.
“Julian. We shouldn’t go over there.”
He turns and smiles softly at me, his eyes filled with love. “We have to. They’re waiting for us.”
I’m so confused. Why would anybody be waiting for us at a wedding I know nothing about?
“Julian, I don’t want to intrude on someone else’s wedding.” I tug on his hand to stop him. “We can watch the sunset somewhere else.”
He doesn’t stop walking and as we get closer, I can see why.
Standing in front of me are all the important people in my life, and they’re standing with all of the important people in Julian’s. Oh. My. God. My hand flies to my mouth as I realize the wedding I’m walking toward is my own. I stop dead in my tracks and tug on his hand once again indicating I want him to stop.
“Julian?”
“Sí, mi amor?” His eyes are wet and I can’t remember ever seeing him look this nervous. His hand is shaking in mine.
“This is for us? We’re getting married tonight?”
My questions make him chuckle softly. “If you say yes?”
I shake my head in disbelief. I can’t believe this is happening. “Are you kidding me? Is this even real? How did you do this?”
Julian turns so we’re completely facing each other and takes my hands in his. “This is real, baby. Everyone who loves us is here to be part of this, and all we have to do is walk over there and say I do.”
I lean in and kiss him softly on the lips. “Let’s go then.”
His smile could not be bigger, and it occurs to me that until that very second he thought I might say no to this surprise wedding. Like there was any chance of that.
As we get closer I see our parents, both of my sisters, their husbands and kids, Danny and Gabby, Rafi, Yvette and Esteven, Julian’s aunts and uncles, Ruben and his wife, and all of my friends. Marissa, Kevin, Shannon, Cory, Jenna, Lauren, and Sean are all here. Ellen is also here with her husband. My eyes fill with tears. The air is filled with love and positive vibes, and I’m beyond moved.
Our parents and Marissa and Danny all come to us, and when I get close enough my mom wraps me in her arms and holds me close.
“You are so beautiful, honey. I hope you’re okay with this.”
I smile and shake my head. I whisper back to her. “I feel like I’m dreaming, Mom.”
She repeats Julian’s words. “It’s real and you so deserve this moment.”
She lets go and Marisol takes her place and hugs me. She doesn’t say much, and looks close to tears. Her smile is warm and genuine, and I know she’s happy. I imagine she’s thinking about her own daughter, and I squeeze her back to let her know no words are needed and that I understand. Antonio is next in line and I can see the hesitation on his face. I hate that we have this awkwardness between us, so I try to erase it by hugging him as well. I can feel him relax and the smile I get in return lets me know we’ll be okay.
When I turn to Marissa she hugs me and hands me a stunning bouquet of tropical flowers. “He swore me to secrecy, Lex. I did my best to help him make this something you would do yourself. I hope you like it.”
She looks nervous. “Everything is perfect. Thank you.” With a look of relief on her face, she hugs me again and walks up to the end of the dock where the officiant is waiting for us. Danny gives me a bear hug and follows her.
I turn toward my dad next, and almost lose it when I look at him. He looks so happy and emotional, and I can tell he’s fighting off tears as well. I keep my composure and turn to Julian when I hear him say my name.
“Lexie, your dad would like to give you away, so I’m going to go wait for you by the water. Are you okay with everything?”
“I’ve never been more okay with everything, Julian. This is amazing. Go up there already so I can marry you!”
As they all walk away I look back at my dad. “Are you okay, Dad?”
“There are no words to describe how happy I am right now. I love you more than anything in this world, and knowing you’re getting ready to walk into a life with a man who loves you that much too is one of the best feelings I’ve ever had as a parent. I mean look what he did for you, baby girl. He knows how special you are and that means so much to me. You deserve nothing but happiness.”
I can’t keep the tears back, and one escapes and slides slowly down my cheek. My dad gently wipes it away. I’m so happy he’s okay and here with me. I can’t imagine not having him be part of this moment. “Ready?”
I nod and wrap my arm through his. As I turn around and see what’s right in front of me, I feel my body straighten up and a total sense of calm and strength washes over me. I’m beyond ready for this. As I walk down the sandy path toward the water where Julian is waiting, I make eye contact with all of the people that are here with us. I feel so blessed and so loved as I look at my friends and my family, and the people who are about to become my family. Love truly is in the air, and I feel it surrounding me as I make my way to Julian.
I’m forced to wipe another tear from my cheek when I watch my dad embrace Julian and hear him thank him for loving me like he does. My dad places my hand in Julian’s, kisses me softly on the cheek, and goes to sit with my mom. I turn to face Julian and the officiant standing before us. He smiles and addresses me first in a lilting Jamaican accent.
“I understand you were to be surprised by this, but you are standing here with a beautiful smile on your face so I assume you are ready to be married?”
I giggle. “I’m so ready.”
“Good. Then let’s get you two married.”
I hate to admit it, but his words are kind of a blur to me. I can’t stop staring at Julian. My heart and mind are consumed by the love I see in his eyes, and everything else has dimmed to a whisper in the background. It feels like it’s just the two of us standing here, we are that connected. When he takes my hands and speaks, he jars me out of my trance.
“Lexie, I know you didn’t have time to prepare anything,” he says with a chuckle. “Obviously because I sprung this on you, but I did plan some things I’d like to say today, and I’d like to share them with you now if that’s okay?”
I nod and smile. “Of course.”
“First, I want to tell you again how incredibly beautiful you look right now. I know you had a different dress and different shoes in mind for your wedding day, but if I’m being honest you could be wearing anything and you’d still look perfect. I want to thank you for standing here with me today. I’m taking that as a sign I did okay.”
I laugh out loud, squeeze his hand, and look around me at the most amazing setting I could’ve ever imagined getting married in. “You did okay.”
“Good. Because I’d do anything for you and I hope you know that now. You didn’t just fall on my body in the stairwell six months ago, you fell into my heart and into my soul too, and nothing in my life has been the same since. I truly had no idea what my capacity to love was until I met you, Alexa. Now when I look at you, I feel nothing but love. Even through all of the things we’ve had to deal with, I’ve always felt love. Always. Solamente tu. You said something to me when we first met that has never been far from my thoughts. Do you remember what you said to me when I told you we were going to happen?”
I nod. Of course I remember. “I told you we were going t
o be epic.”
Julian smiles his Bauer smile. “Yes, you did, and at the time it sounded really good, but just in case I looked up the word ‘epic’ the other day so I could make sure we were on the right track. One definition of epic is ‘something extending beyond the usual or ordinary, especially in size or scope’. Well mi amor, we have that covered, because there is nothing ordinary or usual about what I feel for you and this life we’re building together. What I feel is extraordinary in size and scope and very, very epic. I’m so ready and so excited to share every part of me and my life with you because I know, without any doubts, you’re the one for me.”
I’ve never heard such beautiful words and for a moment I’m rendered speechless. I have to fight back my tears, my happy tears, and compose myself before I respond. I’m a little upset I haven’t had time to prepare anything. It’s important to me to make sure I say everything I need to say in this moment, and I want to say it perfectly.
I squeeze his hands tightly and look up at his beautiful face. “I hope I can express how I’m feeling like you just did, Julian, because you couldn’t have said anything better to me than what you just said. I’m a little unprepared, but I’ll do my best here.”
“I’m sure you’ll do just fine.”
“Six months ago I would’ve never been able to believe that I was deserving of this life and that I was about to marry the most amazing man in the world. Honestly, a few months ago I was questioning your love and my ability to be who you needed. But I never questioned my love for you. I’ve always known I loved you, even when I wouldn’t admit it to you or to myself. What amazes me the most is through it all you stayed and you held on to what you thought our future could be, and you promised me you’d love me until I believed it all. I don’t know I always deserved that from you, but I thank God you did it.”
I see the wetness in Julian’s eyes and my heart swells with love. I want him to feel like I do; completely loved and appreciated.
“It’s funny you bring up the word ‘epic’, and I agree what we share is extraordinary. But it also has another meaning to me. In every epic tale there is a hero, or someone who goes above and beyond. Well, Julian Bauer, you’re my hero. Your love, patience and understanding of who I am, who I want to be, and what I need from you are what’s extraordinary.”
I turn around and look at the people sitting behind me and quickly take in the whole setting. “I can’t believe what you’ve done here today. It’s magnificent and exactly what I wanted my wedding day to feel like. When I stand here and look at you, I almost have to pinch myself to believe it’s real. You’re my fairytale, Julian Bauer, and I’m the luckiest woman in the world.”
Julian is staring deeply into my eyes and when he mouths the words, “I’m the lucky one,” I fall a little more in love with him.
“But I have to ask you a question before we officially get married, and I need you to be totally honest.”
Julian tilts his head and looks at me quizzically. I have a smile on my face so I don’t think he’s too worried. “You said you were ready to share your entire life with me, right?”
“Sí,”
“Well that needs to include your closet Julian. Are you ready to let me have half of your closet?”
I hear the laughter erupt from behind us and when I look around, I see everyone is smiling. That moment was so incredibly intense that I needed to lighten the mood a little so I didn’t start bawling.
“Something tells me I might regret agreeing to this, but yes, you can have half of my closet.”
The officiant looks at both of us to see if we have finished with our portion of the vows, and we both smile and nod at him, giving him the green light to proceed. When he gets to the part where he asks for the rings my heart sinks. I don’t have a ring for Julian. Marissa, Shannon, and I went shopping a few weeks ago and stopped in a few jewelry stores at Bal Harbour. I had a good idea of what I wanted to buy, but of course I hadn’t done it yet. It wasn’t hard for me to pick out a ring for Julian. While all of his jewelry is expensive, it’s also all classic and simple. I found a platinum band with a hammered finish and polished edges bordered by inset bands of milgrain engraving that was perfect. It wasn’t cheap and I was in no rush to buy it so I didn’t. I know Julian is going to be pulling out some fancy band to go with my engagement ring and for the first time since I walked around the corner and realized what was going on, I’m sad.
I’m sure the expression on my face says how I’m feeling and of course Julian notices. “No te preocupes, mi amor. You didn’t know.”
Of course he’s going to tell me not to worry about it. As he turns to Danny to get my ring I feel Marissa tap me on my shoulder. When I turn around she hands me a small black box and whispers, “I hope this is the one you were going to buy. Shannon thinks it is too.” I take the box from her and open it, and lying there against the beige silk is the ring I wanted to buy. Oh my God. How did these people do all this for me without me having a clue?
“This is it, Mari. I can’t believe you bought this for me.”
She smiles and laughs. “Oh, I didn’t buy that for you. You’re gonna pay me back.”
I take the ring out of the box and give her a huge hug. “I’m not sure what to say. Thank you.”
I turn to face Julian who is holding a ring in his hand. He looks down and sees I am as well and looks confused. “Mari took care of it for me. We went looking one day and she remembered the one I wanted to get you.” His smile grows even bigger and I can tell how much this means to him. I make a mental note to do whatever I need to make this up to Marissa.
Julian goes first, repeating after the officiant that he will love me forever and says his ‘I dos’, then he slides the ring on my finger. It’s so beautiful. It’s a delicate band of emerald cut diamonds that fit perfectly with my engagement ring. I know right away he must’ve had them made together because it can’t be a coincidence they match so well. When it’s my turn, I repeat my vows, say my ‘I dos’, and slide his ring on. I don’t need to ask if he likes it because the look on his face says everything.
Julian and I hold each other’s hands as we hear the words we have been waiting for. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
He takes a step forward, lets go of one of my hands, and places it under my chin. He tips my face up so I’m looking up at him. The kiss he places on my lip is so soft and so sweet and so full of love, that it literally takes my breath away. The next moments are filled with hugs and kisses and well wishes from all of our friends and family members. Julian is reluctant to let go of my hand and I feel the same way. I feel like I’m in a dream, and his touch keeps reminding me it’s real and that we just got married.
The ceremony part of our wedding couldn’t have been more perfect and I find myself looking forward to whatever Julian has arranged for the reception. In typical Julian fashion, he seems to read my mind.
“It’s time to go party, baby. The night is just beginning.” So with the backdrop of a Florida sunset lighting our way, we head toward an elevated wooden platform just down the beach. The platform is on stilts and literally sits over the water, which is calmly lapping against its pilings. There are sturdy wooden tables and an assortment of eclectic chairs set up in no real order. The randomness gives the setting an easy vibe and matches the mood of the evening. The tables are covered in off-white cloths and adorned with glass jars filled with the same multi-colored flowers in my bouquet. Tall pillar candles, the color of the water below us, flicker against the approaching night sky. Tiki torches are attached to the railings of the platform and provide the perfect amount of lighting. There is a table toward the back of the platform with a loveseat behind it and I assume that’s the table where Julian and I will sit. I still can’t believe he pulled this off and that everyone I love is here with me under this beautiful night sky. I truly feel like Cinderella.
Soon the air is filled with the delicious aroma of the food Julian has ordered for our meal. Ev
eryone finds a seat and wait staff that weren’t present minutes ago appear and begin offering a variety of dishes. “You ordered everything on the menu?”
“I didn’t know what you’d want so I chose a little of everything.”
“It all looks and smells so good. I’m starved too.” I look at the plates being passed around of fish, pasta, and steak and realize I haven’t eaten in hours.
Julian leans in and whispers in my ear. “Then eat, mi amor. You’re doing it for two, remember.”
The knowledge I’m pregnant is never a moment away from every conscious thought I have, but to be honest, I haven’t thought about it much in these last hours. I’ve been totally focused on Julian. His comment brings my pregnancy right back to the forefront of my thoughts and for the first time since I found out I was pregnant, I want to scream it to the world.
I look back at him and whisper, “Should we share that tonight?”
A huge smile crosses his face and I understand immediately that keeping this a secret has been hard on him. “I’d love to. It’s such a happy night and everyone important to us is here, but it’s up to you.”
I nod and smile. I’m ready, and I’m sure the right moment will present itself tonight. The next hour is filled with food and laughter, and Julian and I go from table to table and talk to everyone. It’s so emotional for me and I’m near tears the whole time. I can’t believe he did this. After making the rounds we sit back down on the loveseat. When I hear the clinking of silverware on the crystal champagne glasses, I lean in for a kiss from Julian and watch as Marissa stands up to make her toast. I’m unable to hold back my tears when I hear her words and the love in her voice.
