Secret Baby for my Brother's Friend

by Ella Brooke

  Her legs pulled more tightly around him, and she broke their kiss apart long enough to scream his name.

  “God, Cemal, never stop!”

  He did as best as he could to accommodate her commands, but he was only human. Eventually, he collapsed to the bed, pulling her down onto his chest with the motion. Craning his neck up, he kissed the top of her head and rubbed at her back.

  “I love you, kitten,” he said, not ashamed of his honesty.

  “Cemal…I…”

  “You don’t have to do anything, and I know you’re not sure of anything yet. That’s okay. It’s my job to make you sure. I just want you to know that I love you, everything about you, and I’ll be here to make you see that, no matter what.”

  Juliana was silent after that declaration, but he ignored that deafening hush. He had time, and she would be his. A sheikh never lost anything; of that much, he was certain.

  Chapter Eleven

  Her heart was heavy.

  Tomorrow Juliana was scheduled to fly home. She’d already checked her final set of systems within the smart-home’s security parameters. Everything was working fine and every wire, plug, and chip seemed in place. There was no reason for her to stay, even if Cemal would be more than happy to make an excuse to Ms. Grant. But her life in California beckoned, and she still owed it to her career to go back. She owed it to herself not to fall too fast. She’d made that mistake back in high school with “Robbie.” Cemal might have grown into a responsible ruler, but there was still every risk that he could shatter her heart into a million pieces. He’d done it once before. No. Being slow, being smart, and keeping independent was what she needed to do. In a year, if everything continued to go well, then she could come to the palace.

  But she wouldn’t give him the kind of power to shatter her world like he had once before. She’d never survive that.

  Sitting down, she accessed her Skype account. So far, she’d been able to keep her mom at bay by sending her quick updates from her work e-mail. Last time, however, her mother sent a reply demanding that Juliana get back online with her. After all, Juliana wasn’t too old to “get her hide tanned” if she kept ignoring her mother’s e-mails and attempts to video call her. Since it was easier to deal with Colette than to keep riling her up, Juliana was acquiescing to her mother’s demands.

  “Hi,” she said, biting nervously at her lower lip as her mother’s face appeared on screen.

  Like usual, her mother’s eyebrows were fleshly plucked and her hair was teased as high as it could go. Her mother definitely subscribed to the school of “the taller the hair, the closer to God.”

  “You haven’t really tried to get in touch with me. I don’t appreciate being screened.”

  She nodded, amazed that even now her mother could reduce her to feeling like that same, insecure girl she was back in high school. Maybe she was still that robotics team captain and mean girl magnet she’d always been. Cemal said he saw more in her, but that was so hard for her to believe. No one else had ever seen it, and as much as she cared about Cemal, she was worried for his judgment.

  “I wasn’t, Mother,” she defended. “I just…there were final checks. My phone doesn’t work here, and I’ve been mostly using work e-mail when and if I have to on my tablet. I just haven’t had the time. Besides, we were traveling in Tunisia too.”

  Her mother shook her head and let out a curse word that would crumble her sweet, old Southern lady façade if anyone ever overheard it. “Why were you in another country? Hell, you were on another continent. Does he have super-secret servers in Africa? I have heard that hiding your electronics is all the rage among the powerful lately.”

  “No, Mother. I wasn’t helping him with e-mail scandals,” she said, trying to keep from rolling her eyes. “It was actually really nice. I’d been very stressed with difficult code, and he knew I wasn’t dealing well with it. He wanted to relax me.”

  Her mother’s eyes narrowed. “I bet he did.”

  “No,” she said, deciding it was best not to discuss anything, well, extracurricular on the trip. “He knew I was a Star Wars fan.”

  “Yes, that’s such a productive pastime.”

  “Well, billions of dollars can’t be wrong, exactly,” Juliana added cheekily. “My point is that we saw some sites. It was nice.”

  “I really don’t want you to rely so much on that man. I thought he was a client.”

  Juliana sighed. If she were going to be seeing Cemal, then she should let her mother know she wasn’t being flighty or falling suddenly for just any foreign dignitary. Frankly, Juliana hoped that if their dating went well, then more really would happen. She knew he loved her, and she cared for him. Her mom needed to start getting used to all of this; Juliana had just been chickening out earlier.

  “He is, but he’s not just any client. I know it’s the biggest, weirdest coincidence in the world, but I met Cemal Samara before. At the time, he was going by ‘Robbie’ and he was a senior at St. Paul’s, but—”

  Her mother’s eyes seemed to blaze when she heard that spiel. “You can’t be serious. There’s no way that boy ever amounted to anything.”

  “Well, his parents obviously thought it would make him a target to have his real name be used at school. Believe me, my mind was as blown as yours was, Mom.”

  “So you’ve taken back up with that boy?” her mother practically screeched.

  “His name is really Cemal, and he’s a sheikh. Jordan is probably the most peaceful country in the region and he and his father’s legacy are a big reason why that is. How can you even hold what a seventeen-year-old did against a man in his thirties?”

  “Because it’s utterly ridiculous that you’d even think about dating him, let alone go out of town on getaways with him.”

  Juliana crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. “Why, specifically? I need you to say it.”

  “Oh, don’t think I won’t. He’s not like us. He’s not even a Christian.”

  “So! I’ve barely been to church since I went to college. It’s not a big deal to me.”

  “It’s a huge deal to your father and me. We already have some heathen grandchildren. I won’t have a second set!”

  “We’re not anywhere close to having kids, Mother,” she said, gritting her teeth a little as she spoke. “You don’t understand. We’re just rekindling things. We’re trying to date, but it doesn’t mean that there are rings or kids yet.”

  Not that Cemal wouldn’t propose today if he thought I’d say yes…

  “Still, if you start up with a heathen, you end up with one.”

  “Do you even listen to the things you say?”

  “I know what I’m saying. You go away on this one job, and whether you know Seminole—”

  “Cemal!”

  “Whomever from before or not shouldn’t matter. He’s not like us, and your family will never approve of the match, not in a million years!”

  “I know but—”

  “Besides, if you’d bothered to keep in touch with me, then you’d know that Phillip has been trying to get in touch with you. He couldn’t get you on your cell or e-mail.”

  Her jaw fell slack as a riot of butterflies seemed to flutter through her stomach. “I can’t have heard you right. That doesn’t make any sense.”

  “He says that he wants to take you back, darling. Isn’t that great? You’re not getting any younger or thinner and he is the right sort of man.”

  “The kind who’d screw my best friend in my bed. Mother, really!”

  “The kind that we’d welcome home at family dinner with open arms. The kind who wasn’t a hellion as a kid and wouldn’t be a total embarrassment for the rest of us. The kind who actually has heard a Bible verse or two.”

  “I…”

  “He wants you back, honey, and don’t you want to have good family Christmases with us? Not some Ramadins or whatever they are? You’d never do well fasting.”

  “Phillip might have heard the verses, but he was far from fol
lowing them, and I—”

  “Wouldn’t it be a waste of three years to not even hear him out?”

  “I…well, I come home tomorrow,” she said, her voice dry.

  She wanted to build something with Cemal, she did, but she’d loved Phillip. If he had an apology when she got back to the United States, she did owe it to him to hear it out. Besides, she could say she didn’t want her mother’s approval all she wanted to, but it wasn’t the truth. No. Juliana craved it, searched for it as relentlessly as a junkie looked for the next needle. If she went further with Cemal, no matter how accomplished he was, no matter how great a man, then she’d never really fit with her family again.

  Hell, her parents might just exile her fully for dating a “heathen.”

  She wasn’t sure she had the strength to cut off everything she’d known or tried to do so far for Cemal. Besides, wasn’t that the point of taking things slowly? Wasn’t that the point of not just staying in Jordan to begin with? She had to figure out her life and not just rush, because once Cemal had made her heart go pitter-pat.

  And now he gives you mind-blowing orgasms. That too.

  And love. She knew what he was offering her, but was the love of one man worth turning her back on her family?

  Juliana just wasn’t sure.

  “Jules, honey, did you hear me?”

  “Yes. I’ll call him when I’m settled and we’ll meet. I just need to figure everything out.”

  “See, that’s my girl.”

  ***

  She knew she could have been more demonstrative with Cemal when he put her on the jet home. For one thing, it would be a month at least before she felt those lips on hers again. For another, it might be the last time that she was with him, depending on what Phillip had to peddle. Still, she was stiff with him and Juliana knew it. Her head was reeling from far too much too soon, from being caught between her mother’s wishes and her own, her old life and a scary, unplanned new one.

  From what was expected of her and what she’d always wanted, deep down.

  Seeing Phillip was just about seeing if she still wanted “safe.” That was all. Surely she’d see Cemal in a month and could make it up to him then. If he thought she’d been weird when he helped her aboard a few days ago, then she could definitely help him get over that soon enough. All she had to do was see Phillip one last time and get that lingering doubt resolved.

  When the knock sounded on her apartment door, Juliana bolted upright in her seat. That was so Phillip. Even if they had five minutes before her meeting, he’d arrived early. That had been one of the many sore points in their relationship—their different views on time. He was Mr. Punctual. Her stomach roiled even as she walked to the front door of her apartment. She’d been having stomach issues in the few days she’d been back from Jordan. She blamed some food she hadn’t been able to resist buying from street vendors. Maybe that had some bacteria her stomach couldn’t shake. Of course, she didn’t know what to expect from a meeting with a man who had ripped her heart out.

  But her mother said his tone was different on the phone—remorseful.

  Maybe it wasn’t weird she was nauseated after all. Maybe it was weird that she hadn’t puked yet.

  She pulled the door open before he could pound harder on it. Standing before her was Phillip. He had stopped shaving so there was a scruffy, blond beard on his chin, which seemed to complement his cerulean blue eyes. He looked good, and she had to admit that she’d missed him, at least the way they’d been when they’d first started dating and when their engagement was brand new.

  “Hey,” he said. “I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you giving me the chance to talk things out. I thought you were screening me so I called Colette. Then she explained how you weren’t getting regular cell or non-work e-mail in Jordan. I’m just glad that she was able to get you to see me.”

  Juliana nodded and followed him back into the apartment. Phillip flopped easily back onto the sofa as if he’d never left it. He’d always loved the overstuffed thing. She’d always wanted something a little less made for a man cave and endless football fests. She didn’t let herself relax nearly as much, just leaned against the kitchen table. Hopefully this would give Phillip the right idea.

  She was here to listen to him; Phillip was far from cleared to stay.

  “Mom likes you. It’s why she’s so excited that you were calling. I just…you want me back?”

  He nodded. “It was years of our lives. How can you just throw that out the window?”

  “I think a better way to think about it is that you’re the one who threw it away when you were messing around with Candy.” Juliana sighed. “Just because my mom has probably been lighting candles down at the church and hoping for this, well, it doesn’t mean that this is what I want.”

  “She told me that you met some sheikh in Jordan.”

  She snorted and shook her head. “I never should have told her anything.”

  “But you did. I have to say I’m on her side. You know it’s a fantasy. Your mom and dad aren’t ever going to like some Middle Eastern guy.”

  “Cemal would never cheat on me.”

  “And I’m so sorry. After you threw me out, I thought everything through. You needed to be more accessible, be around more, but I needed to tell you what I wanted from you. I can’t expect you to be a psychic. I…can’t we try again? I even called around to the church in your parents’ hometown, the one they were married in.”

  Juliana blinked, unsure of where all this was going. “What?”

  He shrugged. “Okay, I mean that your mom helped me with the details after I asked her to help. Seriously though, Jules, I want us to set the date. This June we get married, do what we always should have done. Can you imagine how big the celebration will be? After all, it’s not like your sis got married in a church.”

  “I…no, she didn’t,” Juliana fumbled, feeling everything moving so fast.

  He stood then and crossed over to her. Leaning down, he kissed her cheek. “I know I have a long way to go to get back right with you, but I want to do it. I will do it. I think we need to get a new place, one with a spare room. I can start out there until you feel I’ve earned your trust back. This apartment just has too many bad memories.”

  “And what…you still cheated on me. Why do you think I’ll just take you back?”

  “Because,” he said, cupping her chin. “The other guy is a crazy fantasy. I’m the one your family approves of. I’m the one who’s steady and stable with the good, respectable job in America. I’m the one who will make your relatives happy on Thanksgiving and actually knows a few facts about the football games that will be playing. You really want to be the odd woman out all of your life?”

  He smelled slightly of vodka, and she wondered if he’d had to work himself up with liquid courage before coming to see her. Phillip had never been a huge drinker before, but she understood that instinct. If she hadn’t been so nauseated today, she might have taken a sip of white wine to help inoculate her for this whole, awkward mess. It clashed in her memory, this scent. She really wished she was buried in Cemal’s arms, that she could smell the sweet tang of saffron again.

  But, God, she didn’t want her family and her mother to reject her for the rest of her life either.

  This was the way her life had always been planned before. This was what it was supposed to be, even if it wasn’t what her heart truly wanted.

  “Alright, we’ll try this, but I can’t promise you’ll get out of the spare bedroom easily. You hurt me, Phillip. You tore right into me.”

  “I know, and I’m going to spend so much time making it up to you. I promise.”

  “I hope so,” she said, even as he hugged her tight.

  Why did the embrace feel like a noose tightening?

  Chapter Twelve

  Four Months Later

  It was getting harder to hide her bump.

  She’d realized six weeks home from Jordan that she wasn’t getting her period. All of a sud
den the nausea she kept blaming on Middle Eastern bacteria finally made sense. Juliana had never suffered from food poisoning. Of course not. She’d become pregnant. That one perfect night with Cemal, the one that she still dreamed about regularly, had done the job. It couldn’t be Phillip. She wasn’t sure what had happened those two weeks they’d been apart, but apparently Phillip had seen a glimpse of his life without her and freaked out. Hell, for all she knew, the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future came to him and threatened him within an inch of his life. Still, in their new place, Phillip was sticking to his word. He sometimes cuddled with her on the couch, although she’d been standoffish ever since she’d realized she was pregnant after a doctor’s visit two months ago. But, as a show of good faith, he still slept in the guest bedroom.

  The father had to be Cemal.

  She had no idea what to do.

  Part of her felt like she owed Cemal. He’d love to know this, wouldn’t he? He’d practically proposed to her back in Tunisia. It had pained her to screen him, to stop speaking to him at all and beg him not to visit. He’d called a few times until she drove him away. It was ironic. No sooner had she begged him off than she’d realized she was growing heavy with his child. What would he say?

  God, what would her family say?

  She couldn’t hide this for long. No. Juliana was trapped in a spider’s web of lies and deceit of her own making, and she knew that no one would be happy when all the truths came to light.

  Groaning, she tried to get comfortable in her bed. At only four months, she hadn’t gained more than fifteen pounds. So far, Phillip hadn’t noticed because she’d been wearing her baggiest clothes around him, always in layers even if it made little sense. At work, she wore jackets a size too big to hide her middle, and with her mother, thank God, she only had to check in over Skype or the phone. So being a bit heavier wasn’t throwing off her center of gravity yet. The baby wasn’t big enough to be squashing her kidneys when she laid flat. It was her own worries that kept her away, those stray thoughts whirring through her mind as she tried to figure out what the hell she was going to do and how she was going to do it.