“Good!” I screamed, “because I am never, ever going to become your woman! Never, never, never!”
I watched him scoop up his clothes and put them on, and then head towards the direction of the village. I fell back into the water and started to sob. I felt hopeless and shunned. Everything was spinning out of control.
Muraco thought I had some evil magic over him, the same as Lomasi thought, and Emmet was taking advantage of Lomasi, not to mention that Dorie kept looking at Tala like she was considering taking him up on his offer of having her as his woman. Nigel was already turning into an Indian. It seemed like I was the only sane person in my family, who was willing to stand by my own decision to live on the farm and continue the legacy that our father started.
I felt more than lonely; I felt abandoned. I had been abandoned by my own father when he had brought Clinton back, expecting me to marry him. Nigel had abandoned the whole family by wanting to become an adopted Indian, and the family dog was abandoning me by staying with Nigel. Dorie and Emmet were being drawn by the fact that they didn’t think they could find a mate, because we lived so far out, so why not just give into being with an Indian, instead? I may end up staying at the farm all by myself, I thought in self-pity.
“Muraco sent me,” I heard a voice say, and I could see Inteus standing near the bank. “He is very upset. He says you cause bad magic to fall over him.”
“The only bad magic is his own demons causing him to try to take what he wants without my consent,” I hissed. “Then he has the nerve to blame me, because I won’t give myself to him willingly as his woman.”
Inteus looked shocked.
“Did he harm you? Did he take you against your will?”
He started to step towards me.
“I don’t want to talk about it, but I am still a virgin, so you can stop acting so concerned.”
“He said I should watch you from this moment onwards,” he told me.
“I don’t need anyone to watch me! I can take care of myself.”
“I must do as he asks, since you are his responsibility, and he would lose face if he left that responsibility unattended.”
“Oh yes! I forgot about losing face! It is all about losing face, but no one cares about how I feel or if don’t wish to be watched!”
“You are upset.”
He waded out into the river, and took my hand, pulling me to my feet. Then he took his shoulder blanket and wrapped it around me.
“Come back to the lodge. Tomorrow you will forget all this.”
“I will never forget all this. I vowed once not to trust a man again, after the man that Muraco shot, tried to force himself on me. Muraco is no better, as far as I am concerned. He can’t stop himself from wanting me, in the same way Clinton couldn’t stop himself from wanting me. At least, I thought that Muraco actually felt something for me, but you are mistaken; he is not crazy in love with me. He is just crazy period!”
Inteus led me back to the lean-to and handed me my nightgown, when we got there. I pulled on, and crawled under the buffalo robes.
“Tomorrow is a new day,” Inteus told me, as he crawled in beside me. “The night will start to heal your heart, and maybe Muraco will consider his actions and ask you to forgive him.”
“It won’t do any good. My heart won’t be healed, and I shall not forgive him.”
“Then it is his loss,” he responded quietly.
When I woke, the next morning, Inteus was already up, and probably going about his daily business. Although the Indians always rose with the morning sun, no one ever insisted I do likewise. I was left to decide for myself, and even though I was used to getting up early; it had been because of the need to do chores and feed animals. Now there was nothing to occupy my days, once we had finished chinking the lean-to, so I didn’t see any reason for rising early.
I went out to see what Dorie had fixed to eat, but when I got there, someone else was fixing a sort of cornmeal mush to eat.
“Where is Dorie?” I asked.
“You mean Dancing Hands?” the plump, pleasant looking Indian woman responded.
“Yes, Tala calls her that,” I remembered.
“She is preparing to be tied to Wolf,” the woman told me. “The ceremony will begin at the setting of the sun, but she must be purified, and prepared by the women chosen to administer to her.”
“You mean she is marrying Tala?” I croaked.
“She will become his woman,” I was told.
“She never told me she had made up her mind to be his woman,” I shrieked.
“Wolf gave your brother four horses for her, since she has no father,” she went on to explain.
“And why hasn’t Emmet mentioned this to me? He would never agree to let Dorie marry an Indian!”
She gave me a perplexed look, and then shrugged.
“Where is her teepee?” I demanded.
The woman pointed in a general direction, so I just started walking that way. When I ran into Inteus, I asked him where Tala’s teepee was, and he agreed to bring me there.
“Did you know about Tala getting tied to my sister?” I asked, feeling left out of everything.
“Tala told me this morning. I was coming to tell you about it.”
“Emmet knew. He got four horses out of the agreement, and he never came and mentioned it to me,” I complained.
“You will have to ask him why he didn’t tell you,” was all Inteus said.
When we reached the teepee, there was no one inside. “Where would she be?” I asked Inteus.
“They are probably being purified in the sweat-lodge. It is not permitted to disturb them, so you must wait to talk to your sister.”
“Never mind! I will go find Emmet, instead.”
I headed to the teepee where Apenimon had been sheltering both Emmet and Nigel. I noticed four horses tied to a stake outside the teepee, and assumed they must be the horses Tala gave Emmet for Dorie’s hand.
I lifted the flap to the teepee, but only Nigel was inside.
“Where is Emmet?” I asked. “Did you know your sister was marrying Tala?” I demanded.
“He will be good to her. I know you do not like it here, but Dorie does, so don’t cause any trouble.”
“Of course not! None of you care what I think anyway! Do you know where your brother is?”
“He went to Lomasi’s teepee. He likes her. Maybe they will get tied too.”
“Have you all turned heathen?” I asked, as I backed out of the teepee, bumping into Muraco, as I did so.
“You believe we are heathen?” Muraco asked, frowning at me.
“Go away! I don’t want to talk to you,” I spat, pushing past him. “Did you know that my brother and your once ‘intended’ are now sharing each other’s bodies?” I flung over my shoulder, as I headed towards Lomasi’s teepee.
I was brought up short, as Muraco grabbed my arm.
“Are you saying that your brother is laying with Lomasi?” he demanded.
His eyes looked angry, and I thought that perhaps he would kill Emmet over the discovery.
“Why should you care? Isn’t that what men do when they want a woman? They persuade her to enjoy their caresses, so she will give in to him. Then, if that doesn’t work, they try to take her anyway! Don’t look down on Emmet for what you wish to do yourself!” I scolded.
“Her father will force him to take her as his woman, if he knew,” Muraco, informed me.
“Why don’t you let them worry about that? For all we know, Lomasi is using her charms on Emmet, the same way you think I am using magic on you, in order to get him to trust her, so she can slit his throat in the middle of the night.”
Muraco looked shocked. “She would not do that. Murder is against our code.”
“Well, apparently she wasn’t thinking about a code when she tried to stab me!” I reminded him. “So who knows what she will do? I am going to warn Emmet about her.”
“I will come with you,” he insisted.
“Suit
yourself, but I get to talk to Emmet first!”
CHAPTER TWENTY
Muraco and I stood before Lomasi’s teepee, while I called for Emmet to come out. I would have barged right in, if Muraco had not been with me, but I didn’t want him to witness Emmet in Lomasi’s embrace, if that was what they were doing, because I feared what he may do to Emmet if he saw them together that way.
Emmet appeared at the doorway of the teepee, and then came out and frowned down at me.
“I can tell you are about to reprimand me about something. Why else would you seek me out and start yelling for me?” he grumbled.
“Why didn’t you come and tell me about Tala giving you four horses for Dorie to marry him?” I demanded.
“He just offered them this morning. I haven’t had a chance to talk to you.”
“But you gave him permission!” I shrieked.
“How was I going to stop Dorie from doing as she pleased? She wanted that Indian buck, and no matter what I said she would end up going to him. Hell, she was already living with him, so why make a stink about it? Nigel has joined the tribe and now Dorie wants to become a member, the same as him. Who am I to refuse her? She may come to her senses before she actually marries the savage, but if I refused her, it would be a sure thing. She would just marry him out of spite.”
“You don’t understand! Once you give your consent, there is no going back. Indians take bargains very seriously, and the bargain of giving someone in marriage is sacred to them. She is getting married tonight!”
“What? I thought it was just like an engagement, or something, and once Dorie spent the winter here, she would think better of it, and back out.”
“They are being prepared for the ceremony as we speak,” I informed him, “and now you can’t take back your consent!”
Emmet shrugged.
“What am I to do? I am not Dorie’s father, even though you think you are her mother!”
“She is only fifteen!” I cried.
“Women get married younger than her, so why are you getting upset? Just because you are on the verge of becoming an old maid, doesn’t mean your sister has to be one.”
My temper suddenly flared, and I slapped him. The real reason behind my anger, was because he was probably right. I was too independent to become someone’s wife, and bow to a man’s wishes. Maybe I was jealous of Dorie because she wanted to be with Tala, the same as I had wanted to be with Muraco, only I was too stubborn to give in and accept the Indian way of life. Life had been so simple, and now it was getting too complicated.
“Well you should be happily contented having Lomasi at your disposal!” I chided. “Don’t you know that Indian women are supposed to remain chaste until they become married, just like white women are expected to be?”
The statement took Emmet back for a moment, and his eyes became worried, as he glanced over at Muraco, who stood staring at him.
“That is between Lomasi and me. I never forced her to do anything she didn’t willingly go along with. Why not take what she offers me?”
At that statement, Muraco stepped forward, his face inches from Emmet’s face.
“Do you plan to take her as your woman? We could arrange a second ceremony. You could offer the horses Tala gave you, to her father,” he said forcefully.
“We haven’t spoken about it,” Emmet admitted. “Actually, she was the one who seduced me, if you must know! I thought it was accepted, since my own sisters are sleeping in the same teepee with a man.”
He glared at Muraco in a knowing manner.
“I see how you look at my sister, and touch her. I have seen you together at the river. Don’t you try to lecture me, when you have the same drives as every other man!”
“I have not taken your sister, as a man takes a woman, yet you are laying with my childhood friend, a woman I once thought I may take as my woman.”
“But you haven’t taken her. You want my sister instead, and she was angry about it. She wanted from me, what she felt you were giving to my sister, so I took her up on it. Therefore, you have no room to look at me, as though I have broken some Indian law. Talk to Lomasi and lecture her, if you must. I am sure she is familiar with Indian laws in a way I am not.”
I could see Muraco clenching his fists, and his jaw, while a vein in his neck stood out, as he tried to contain his temper. I placed my hand upon his shoulder.
“We can’t change what is already done,” I murmured, “but I came to warn you, Emmet, if what you say is true, and Lomasi has seduced you, it could be that she wants to get back at me by harming you in some way. She has already tried to stab me with her knife, so if I were you, I would keep one eye open at night.”
Emmet looked a little stunned.
“I suppose I should expect something like that from these red heathens. I can’t wait to get back to the farm!”
He turned, abruptly and stomped off.
It was then, that Lomasi appeared from her teepee and stared daggers at me.
“You are the evil one!” she spat. “You have blinded Muraco with your white ways, and red hair, and now you chase your brother from me!”
She headed out after Emmet, and I wondered if maybe she really did like my brother after all.
I stood shaking in anger and confusion. Everything I had taken for granted was now falling away. Our family would never be the same again, and there was no way I could stop all of this madness that seemed to be descending on us, from the moment father returned home from Dodge.
Muraco was looking at me with a touch of sympathy in his eyes. He reached out to touch me, but I brushed his hand away.
“Don’t you touch me! This is all your fault! I never should have saved your life! If you and your friends hadn’t captured us…”
“If I had not come, you would have been forced to be with a man you didn’t want. I saved you from him twice, and you say it is all my fault?”
His eyes burned through me, now angry instead of sympathetic.
“In that case, I suppose we are even. I saved you, and you saved me, and in the process, we have ruined each other’s lives. You are right. You should keep your distance from me, so neither of us are tempted to make things even worse!”
I turned and ran back in the direction of the lean-to, only to be caught in Inteus’ arms, as I tried to rush past him.
“What has happened?” he asked, noting my tears.
“It is none of your concern! I am not your problem. I release you from taking me on as your responsibility. I don’t need an Indian watching over me!”
I pulled myself from his grasp and continued on to the lean-to, flinging myself down on the buffalo robes with the sinking feeling of hopelessness consuming me.
My body shook with uncontrolled tears, as my mind frantically tried to figure out a way out of my dilemma, but finding no answers. I would have to remain with the Indians, no matter what I felt, or what the rest of my family was doing. Emmet said he couldn’t wait to get back to the farm, but what if he changed his mind? What if he too decided to become an Indian and remain with Lomasi? I would have to take care of the farm all on my own, and I didn’t think I would be capable of that. Everything seemed to be turning against me.
I must have fallen asleep, because I was woken up by someone shaking my shoulder.
“It is time,” Inteus was saying. “The ceremony is about to begin.”
I blinked, and then remembered my sister was about to be married to an Indian brave, something I was reluctant to do, in spite of my feelings for Muraco. Inteus helped me to my feet. He didn’t make mention of the fact that I had asked him not to watch over me. Instead, he acted as though nothing had changed.
I followed him, listlessly to the place where all ceremonies took place. I was angry that Dorie had not come to me, the way I had asked her to do, so she could let me know of her plans before she rushed headlong into them. Now there was no stopping this, and I only hoped she did not regret her decision, once the newness wore off.
As th
e group gathered around the central fire, Dorie and Tala appeared, and stood before the Medicine man, who was considered a mystic of the tribe. I took in my breath at the sight of her, standing beside her tall, handsome brave. She wore a white Indian dress beaded and fringed with delicate care. Her long, blond, hair hovered around her shoulders. A few thin braids with beads woven into them, decorated her hair, and she had bells connected to her moccasins, which jingled as she walked beside Tala, holding his weapons, which was considered an honor, since they were the very instruments that fed and protected them.
As they approached, he took the weapons from her, and vowed to dedicate his life to protecting and feeding her, using the very weapons he held in his hands. Tala handed the weapons to a near by brave, and held his hand out to the medicine man, and Dorie did likewise.
I watched as the Medicine man gave a chant, while he shook his rattle. Next, he took his knife and cut the thumbs of both Dorie and Tala, pressing the bleeding thumbs against each other, and tying a strip of cloth around them, binding their thumbs together.
He spoke of their blood mingling as one, causing them to becoming one so they could bring children into the tribe and raise them as good Comanche braves and maidens. Then he directed the tribe to commit themselves to protecting whatever children were brought forth by their union.
When he was through talking, the drums began to beat, and the tribe began to chant, while Tala put Dorie up on his war pony, handing her his weapons again, and led it away to his teepee. The rest of the tribe continued in the celebration, chanting and dancing, while the drums got louder and beat faster. I hadn’t even had a chance to speak to Dorie before she committed to becoming Tala’s woman. She had looked so pleased, though, that I couldn’t wish her anything but future happiness in her choice.
I looked across the circle and could see Lomasi and Emmet together. Apparently, she had persuaded him that she meant no harm towards him, so I was hoping she was with Emmet because she actually like him, and was willing to give up her claim on Muraco.
I also saw Muraco, watching me, with his dark, smoldering eyes. I could tell he was upset, but he had brought everything upon himself, I thought. I couldn’t wait until winter was over.
Kiowa White Moon Page 19
