Fins 4 Ur Sins

by Naomi Fraser

  “Right.” Cal steps closer to me and drops his voice. A sudden gust rattles the windows and droplets fall through the worn boards. “Exactly. He wasn’t there. He was near you, close enough to save you, drive away the sirens, then make the decision to turn you into a mermaid, risking his fins and home because of it.” His voice rises with incredulity. “I saw his face, Ellie. The moment you revealed who you really were. He’s protective of you. There’s something more going on here.”

  “He said he’d been watching me.”

  “How long?”

  “I’m not sure,” I whisper back, though I don’t know why I bother to lower my voice. I can barely hear Cal as it is from the rain on the tin roof. “Since I moved in and started singing at the cliff, I guess. Well that’s what he’s told me.” I put my sandwich on a plate, turn back to Cal and lean against the bench. Which is great because my knees wobble. “You’re saying you think he lied to me? That he didn’t save me because he thought it was right?”

  “Partially. That would’ve made up some of his reasoning. You are an amazing singer if what I heard at the door is any indication. So it’s possible he heard you singing and that’s what made him stick around.” The view outside the window seems to hold Cal’s undivided attention, and there’s something about the bleak and beautiful, dark grey sky that helps the seconds pass. “Consider his kind usually kill people who betray their secrets. They have no remorse about it. So he went against everything he’s ever known and the people in his life, and lost his home to turn you into a mermaid.” Cal pauses, shooting me a sideways look. “The reward must’ve been greater than the risk.”

  “He talks about legends sometimes. He learned about them from reading in his uncle’s library. His uncle is a king.” I stand there, uncertain. “Well,” I begin and wipe my sweaty palms down the opening of the soft robe, “there is more. He’s told me I’m the first person in a thousand years who hasn’t died from turning into a mermaid.”

  Cal’s eyebrows fly up in surprise. “So he’s a prince from the sea, and no one else has become a mermaid in one thousand years? That didn’t raise red flags? The threat to kill me if I say something—he means it. Keep your eyes open, Ellie, that’s all I ask. I can’t tell my family, but I’ll do what I can to help you.”

  “Thanks, Cal. I appreciate it.” My heart pounds in a sickening motion, and the sandwich turns sour in my stomach. I hold a hand over my mouth, take a deep breath and mutter, “Oh, God. But you’re right, aren’t you? Why didn’t I see it before?”

  “You grew a tail?” Cal hazards with a grin. “That’s enough to keep anyone occupied. Bethany’s still shell shocked. She’s walking around outside with a stunned look on her face. But keep your eyes open and ask questions. Yes, he’s trying to save you, but why turn you and risk everything? Find that out and you’ll have the answer to his reward.” Cal turns for the door, and I grab my food. “Ready? Come on. Lakyn’s probably found out I’m missing, because I snuck away while he was securing the boats.”

  There’s nothing else I need from the kitchen, and as we reach the landing together, my legs weaken at the prospect of walking down all those stairs. Suddenly, I’m bone tired. Juggling the sandwich and drink close to my chest, I grip the banister with my right hand; otherwise I’ll go face surfing. Bump, bump, bumpity bump. Who knew a body could be so heavy? It isn’t until the third step that my knees go rubbery, my foot slips out from underneath me, and I swing wildly, crashing my ribs and chest into the wooden railing.

  A low moan of pain echoes from my throat.

  Strong, gentle hands support my back. Cal lifts me up and steadies me on my feet. “Hang on. Wrap your arm around my neck.”

  I try to lean most of my weight against him. “My ribs are killing me.”

  “I bet. Take your time. Watch yourself. No rush. Your knees look shaky. How on Earth did you make it up?”

  I laugh breathlessly, finding humour in the situation. “With great difficulty.” He smells super clean from the rain, though it brings out the sharp scent of his pine aftershave, and I probably cling a little too close because I’m afraid I’ll break my neck. “I should have just slid down the raili—”

  Someone loudly clears their throat, and we both look down at the noise. Lakyn stares up at us, his narrow gaze flitting from me, to Cal and then back again. Cal’s hands rest on my waist while my left arm twines around his neck. My left breast presses against Cal’s chest, and his cheek is above my hair, but he’s only helping me down the stairs. Hot prickles surge beneath my skin, and my tongue ties in knots trying to think up something to say. But why should I even need to?

  “Lakyn.” Cal nods and descends another step. I follow in tandem. He doesn’t release me though Lakyn’s intense look makes my stomach quiver.

  The golden cast of his cheeks, his hair darker from the rain and his drenched shirt show he hasn’t had time to get changed. His wetsuit folds down to his waist. His arms hang by his sides, and I see the veins standing out beneath his skin as his hands clench into fists.

  “We were just talking about you.” A hint of warning threads Cal’s voice.

  “Were you?” Lakyn’s mouth tightens more if that’s possible. “Ellie.” He runs up the staircase and offers his hand. “Need help?”

  “Well, yes. Sorta. I fell,” I say breathlessly, and he’s close enough for the intoxicating scent of icy musk, fresh salt and a hint of lavender to surround me in a glorious aura. I just want him to hold me. A tendril of dismay curls around my heart at the idea. Cal’s right, I need to find out more, but I can’t help relaxing my guard around Lakyn. “My legs are weak. I’m tired, and Cal was helping me down the stairs. I hit my ribs on the railing.”

  “I didn’t mean to leave you on your own for so long.” The deep timbre of Lakyn’s voice is gentle, and I can’t seem to look away from his gorgeous face. My heartbeat sounds too loud in my ears. “I had to check things outside.” Finally, he acknowledges Cal with a grim stare. “Your cousin is looking for you.”

  Cal nods, untangles my arm from his neck and then walks down the stairs. He gives me one last look over his shoulder before he exits the front door. “See you soon, Eloise.”

  Again, another hint of warning colours his tone, and I smile in answer.

  Lakyn winds my arm across his broad shoulders, around his neck and then hooks his arm under my knees. Before I know it, he’s cradling me against his chest. “I don’t want you to fall again,” he whispers in my ear, his warm breath sending shivers across my nape. When we reach the bottom of the stairs, he sets me in a seat opposite Ralph at the table. The look Lakyn gives me seems to pierce my heart, and the tiny prisms of blue make heat flare in my cheeks. “Please stay here until I come back.”

  I watch him disappear in silence, then finally Ralph turns to me and crushes out his cigarette in the black ashtray on the table. “Seeing you today made me realise how much I miss my fins.” He rubs his nose and smiles. “I think I would do anything to get them back. To be able to swim in the ocean like that again.”

  “Is that . . . right?” I focus on him, and recall Cal’s warning of how much Lakyn gave up. Seconds pass in silence. “You regret losing them?” My tongue is stiff and unresponsive. I move my jaw around and clear my throat.

  “Sure. Every finfolk would.”

  Every finfolk? My frown crinkles the tight skin on my forehead. “Even—”

  Ralph laughs before I can say it. “Oh, he won’t say it. Probably won’t think it, either. But when you get to my age, and your missus has died, sometimes you wish you could return.” He closes his eyes and tilts back his head. “Feel that other world closing around me.” His eyes open and his brown gaze cuts through all pretence. “You know the feeling. You’re lucky to be able to move between both worlds.”

  “A thousand years lucky.” A hint of sarcasm leaks into my tone.

  Ralph just chuckles again, and his gaze swerves to the window where rain pelts against the glass, and wild, turbulent sea rolls in the distance. />
  “Other than breathing or giving someone a merman’s kiss, how do you do it? How do you turn somebody into a mermaid? Why do you take that step?”

  “I wondered how long it would take you to ask. You turn someone because you want to be together.” Ralph picks up his beer, and his throat works as he gulps down the alcohol. The bottle clanks against the table, and he scrubs his mouth with the back of his hand, then leans in closer. “First of all,” he whispers, “you have to believe you can.” A heartbeat, two. “Also the best transformations are done just before death so the other person has to be willing to die.”

  “Lord.” I can’t stop myself from being fascinated and horrified. “Go on.”

  “We breathe . . . you breathe,” he amends, “finfolk into the other person, fill up their lungs and they take a part of you with them forever. You already know it’s called the merman’s kiss.”

  “But anyone can do it? Mermaids, too?”

  He nods. “Sure, but . . .” A quick shrug, another guzzle of beer. “We might’ve been doing it wrong for one thousand years.” He gives a bark of laughter, and his eyes look like coal in the fireplace of a deserted house. “Lakyn’s the only one who has succeeded in my lifetime. It’s the big dream down there.”

  “Why do you do it if the risks are so great?”

  “You don’t.”

  I look up into Lakyn’s face. His mouth is a thin line. “It doesn’t matter. Ellie, it’s too dangerous. I did it to you because you were going to die. There are a million things that can go wrong. Right, Ralph?”

  “Two million.” The old seaman squishes the peak of his cap, lights up another cigarette and stares up at the ceiling. “Even in all this time, I still remember her hair. The kind of mermaid she would have made.” He takes a deep drag of his cigarette and when he blows it out, grey tendrils obscure his face. “Here I am breathing in smoke, when I used to breathe in water.”

  I don’t know what else to say. Lakyn releases my arm and sits beside me, and then Cal and Bethany walk back through the door, sloshing water all over the floor. They grab towels from the table and take a seat.

  “There were news reports on the TV about you,” Beth says to me, drying her hair. “They’re doing a report on all the deaths and are gonna blow it up pretty big. I saw it at Cal’s house.”

  “Great.” I run my nails through my hair and lean my elbows on the table, staring at the old wood. “Just what I need. If they find out about me—”

  “They won’t,” Lakyn says. “Not as long as I’m around.”

  I lift up my head, surprised at the vehemence in his tone. Cal meets my gaze across the table, and it’s like he’s trying to tell me something.

  “A few kids were talking about you at school,” Bethany continues and her eyebrows rise, “looks like you’re getting popular. And there are heaps of rumours flying around about you.”

  I pinch the bridge of my nose and laugh. “Oh, Beth. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you before.” The heaviness in my chest can’t be indigestion. “Honestly, how do you tell someone you’re a mermaid? Hello, I know you think I’m human, but . . .”

  Beth smiles and laughs along with me. Her soft giggles all of a sudden turn louder, until we’re both laughing our heads off.

  “I—” she gasps. “I passed out!”

  That makes me laugh even harder until my stomach twitches in pain. “Oh, stop. Please!”

  Her giggles die down. She sighs. “How are you going to tell your mum?”

  I shake my head and frown. “No idea.”

  “Ellie can’t put her family in any more danger,” Lakyn says. “Then she’d lose both parents.”

  Bethany nods in understanding, but her smile is a little sad. “About to be sweet sixteen and a mermaid.”

  Lakyn’s gaze jerks from Bethany to me. “Sweet sixteen? What does that mean?”

  I shrug, and grin, not about to tell him it means I haven’t been kissed on the mouth by a boy. Too embarrassing. I’m sure it’s on the list of what not to bring up in polite conversation. “It’s just this thing we say when we turn sixteen. My birthday is . . .” I quietly add up the days. “In five days. Wow. I didn’t think it was that close.”

  He smiles and slides one hand across the table to capture mine. His gaze travels from my face, my hair and then back to my mouth. “I’d be honoured to celebrate it with you.” He lifts my hand, cradling it against his cheek. The top of his hair is still wet and hangs over his forehead. When he lifts his head, his blue eyes gleam with promise.

  A light shiver travels all the way up from my stomach to my heart and my lips burn.

  32

  I ROLL ONTO my side, and every muscle protests, especially my ribs, stomach and shoulder blade muscles. Bright morning sunlight spears through my window and I rub my eyes, groaning. I squint balefully at the alarm clock on the side table. 6:56 a.m.

  Four more minutes of sleep. Good luck with that. My eyes feel like three-day-old sandpaper, and the big circle on the calendar makes me groan again. I hate school.

  No. NO. Ugh.

  Tuesday. A double period of maths. Swimming training for school. Nerves cramp in my stomach and my breath quickens, but I concentrate on slowing my pulse and then rub the burning ache in the centre of my chest. I can’t go swimming at the school pool—everyone will see I’m a mermaid. I signed up because Lakyn needed to help me, but now that I’ve changed, I have to get off the team.

  I make it to the bathroom, turn on the shower, get undressed and then stand under the hot water. The spray eases the deep ache in my back muscles and some of my stress. The echo of a loud thump rattles the shower screen door. Wynnum consists of houses that have a lot of character, too much sometimes. I hope whoever it is will go away when I don’t answer.

  Another hard knock thumps on the front door, echoing down the hallway and into the bathroom.

  I turn off the taps, listening. The next thump on the front door decides it, and I slip out of the bathroom, a towel twisted around my wet hair and a purple bathrobe over my body. Completely covered, though not exactly how I wish to appear when I answer the front door, I walk out of the bathroom and head to the door.

  What if it’s reporters asking questions about Anders Peterson’s death? I stop a few feet from the door and call out cautiously, “Who is it?”

  “Ralph.”

  Surprise, surprise. I open the door and grin. “Hi.”

  He stands at the door, smiling in his affable way and squishes the peak of his sun-bleached cap. “Mornin’, Ellie. Came by to drop this off.” Sunlight lands on his moustache whiskers and picks out the grey hairs. Deep lines bracket his mouth. The package in his hand is one of those bags from the dollar store, big and orange.

  I peek inside with interest. “Books?”

  “Yup. Early birthday present,” he says with a glint in his eye that means business. “Here take it. Don’t tell the boy.”

  “Top secret, hey?” I grab the bag and hug it to me. “Thank you, Ralph. You didn’t have to give me anything for my birthday.”

  “These can help, they’re what he read and of course the council ordered them out of the king’s library.”

  “Oh.” I stare at him, eyes wide. My knees shake and I lean against the door jamb to steady myself. “You mean that kind of help.”

  He nods. “At least you stand a better chance now, though he doesn’t want you to know about how to change someone, so keep it a secret, all right? I guess he thinks it might get you into trouble. I know from experience it’s way past that.” A flicker of apprehension fills his tone and he looks toward the water in the distance.

  “Well,” I grin, “it’s too late to keep me out of trouble anyway, and I’ve never had much luck working out a boy’s mind. I don’t plan on starting this morning.”

  Ralph smiles. “Righto. See ya later, Ellie. I’m going out on the water today,” he says, a little too loudly, his face still pointing in the direction of the bay. “Hopefully catch some big fish.” He chuckles, stomps d
own the stairs in his thongs and heads back for the car, then guns the single cab Ute onto the road.

  The words “Be careful,” die on my lips. Ralph has spent a lifetime in or on the sea. Who am I to tell him to watch himself? I sigh, trying to get rid of the strange unease inside my chest. He’d last longer than me against sirens, but maybe my reminder would have made him be extra careful.

  Thankfully, Mum has left for work so she isn’t around to question me about Ralph. But her being gone means I can’t get a note to excuse myself from swimming today.

  I kick the front door shut, lock it and work my way back toward the bathroom. The towel unravels around my head and drops to the floor. I hang it over a rail, and set the books on the bathroom counter to have a look-see at my present.

  Finfolk Lore & Transformations. Whoa. Ralph brought the goods. The second book, Guardian Training Manual boasts a slick, weird, waterproof cover in different shades of ocean blue-green.

  I rub my hand over the fabric, and the texture is smooth and sharp. So cool. I smile. Getting dressed for school takes me longer than I anticipate so I skip breakfast, and my hair is in a messy topknot when I leave and lock the door behind me. The books jostle in my shoulder bag. Last thing I want is for Mum to stumble across them in my room. At the bus stop, I sit on the cold seat and flip to the middle of the Guardian Training Manual.

  A picture of a mermaid, drawn by some eccentric artist, rests in the corner of the page. Her arched tail points to a subheading:

  Taking Humans from Their Homes.

  Then another:

  Deep Sleep: How to Manipulate Minds.

  Rocks roll around in my stomach, heavy and knowing. I look to the next heading.

  The Art of Killing Humans.

  This is what Lakyn had to learn—how to kill people? What kind of place does he come from? I turn to the front page and stop at the inscription:

  Lakyn,

  Happy 7th Birthday, Son.

  We’re so proud of you.

  Love Mum and Dad.