Zombie Fallout 4: The End Has Come and Gone

by Mark Tufo

  “That’s pretty gross,” BT said, kicking one of the zombies away before placing a pistol shot in its skull.

  We were so tightly packed together at the end, it was tough to tell where I ended and the next body began.

  Tracy whispered in my ear, “I’ve always loved you, Mike, even after all these years.” “Even after all my idiosyncrasies?”

  “Maybe even more so because of them; they make you who you are.”

  “So you pretty much thinking this is the end then?” I asked her as I pulled my blade free from its errant placement in a zombie’s shoulder. Its teeth snapped dangerously close to my hand. Gary blew the side of its face off. Its exposed chattering teeth made it seem that much more dangerous. If it got a hold of my fingers now, I could watch it eat them and swallow. I know that would have been too much.

  “You should be more careful Dad,” Travis said, finishing the beast off.

  I nodded my head in thanks.

  “Just know that I love you,” Tracy said behind me.

  “The fat lady isn’t singing just yet,” BT said, eavesdropping on our conversation.

  “This is an intimate moment right now, do you mind?” I asked.

  “Not at all, take a moment, maybe go find a quiet area,” he said, breathing heavily. He was also out of bullets and was using his rifle as a club.

  Thank the stars he was so tall that when he swung, no one needed to duck.

  “The fat lady might not be singing yet, but she sure is stuffing her face at the buffet table,” Justin said between rounds.

  “Is anyone not listening to our conversation?” I asked the group. I received no response. “Great,” I said sarcastically.

  My arms hurt from swinging and I only heard a few shots going off. The roof was covered in the detritus from zombie bodies, so much so I thought the roof might be in danger of collapsing under their combined weight. I knew it was only a matter of time. Nobody ever survives a zombie apocalypse, it just isn’t in the cards. A speeder came up on me so fast I was only able to raise my knife in defense. I watched as his mouth closed down on the blade. His teeth splintered on the cold metal and his lips ripped where they made contact with the sharply honed blade. He shook his head from side to side. I guess he thought that he had struck a particularly tough piece of human gristle and if he shook hard enough and long enough he would be rewarded with the sweet, savory satisfaction of meat.

  What the ass did succeed in doing was to pull my knife from my blood soaked hand. Not sure who finished the blade stealer off, but he let go of my knife at the same moment a bullet pierced his skull. The backward push on his brain bucket sent my knife into the air, not far mind you, but I was in a little bit of a sticky wicket. You know, being in the middle of a battle with nothing more than my wits was not a great place to be, considering my wife would probably tell you I’d be wholly unprepared for such a confrontation.

  As I reached out to grab the knife and came back up to defend myself, I felt the press of teeth on my shoulder. ‘What a way to go,’ I thought to myself as I came completely up. “What the…!” is what I yelled.

  Staring back at me, tongue lolling all over the place, was Red Neck Number One. Of course if you remember correctly, he was missing his jaw due to some heavy facial reconstruction from Henry. So Redneck Number One, for the third time, almost got the best of me. “Third time’s the charm,” I told him as I shoved the knife up through his soft palate. There would be no fourth encounter.

  “Sorry man,” BT said, “I missed him completely!” he shouted, blowing a few more zombies to their version of Kingdom Come.

  “It’s alright, this one was personal,” I grimaced as I pulled my knife free. RN#1’s cowboy-boot-wearing feet twitched a couple of times and then I lay to rest at least one of my nightmare s . And then I prepared for more. The zombies stopped their approach at precisely the same time I heard my name spoken.

  “Michael,” Eliza’s voice came silently but with force.

  “That Eliza?” Paul asked.

  “You heard that?” Justin asked him.

  “I thought that was in my head,” I said.

  “Conversing with the enemy?” Alex asked.

  If I thought we were tightly packed beforehand, I was now able to tell who had Chapstick in their pockets and who was just happy to see me.

  “That’s her?” Perla asked, the whites of her eyes more abundantly exposed as fear pulled her features taut.

  “She doesn’t sound so bad,” Cindy said, trying to bolster her flagging spirits.

  Just the sound of Eliza’s voice was enough to suck the soul from a preacher and not many of us looked pious just now.

  “Why are you keeping her waiting?” April asked anxiously.

  “If you’re in such a rush, why don’t you go say ‘Hi,’” BT told her heatedly.

  Like a little kid April hid behind the petticoats of Mad Jack. That is, assuming that he had petticoats on, but you get the picture.

  “See, I told you she only wanted him. El Diablo!” Marta screamed.

  “El Diablo,” Mrs. Deneaux mirrored. “That’s rich!” as she took a puff off her cigarette.

  “When the hell did you have enough time to light that?” I asked her.

  “If I was to die I thought it only dignified that I do so with a Chesterfield in my mouth,” Mrs. Deneaux said smoothly.

  Not a bad ad campaign I thought. Pretty sure Chesterfield wouldn’t have agreed.

  Travis stood up precariously on the lip of the wall so that he could get a better angle over the tops of the zombies’ heads. He blasted two rounds through the open door. We all hoped he got lucky.

  Eliza’s echoing laugh in the stairwell soon answered that question. A lone cataract-eyed zombie fell face first through the portal, his tongue hanging out inches below his open mouth. I was instantly transported back to Day One and Sir Licks A Lot. That was back when a zombie invasion was what it should be, all slow shufflers with no one to lead them. Ah, the Good Old Days.

  “If your spawn deigns to live through the day I would suggest that he does not fire his rifle again,” Eliza said, her voice traveling elusively in the acoustic laden stairwell, making it difficult to get a fix on her. But what do I know? It could be some Vampire trickery.

  “Still though, it is a damn shame he missed,” I told her.

  I think she hissed, either that or a cat got its tail stepped on.

  “I’ve got a surprise for you Michael,” she lilted.

  I quaked as I realized what her surprise most likely was. ‘Oh, poor Tommy.’ I was already mourning his passing.

  “Michael?” a labored voice asked.

  I looked over towards Tracy, whose interest was piqued as was BT’s.

  “Is Lawrence with you?” the voice struggled to ask.

  Questioning looks passed throughout the group. This was a gravely serious time, but still I couldn’t resist a small dig on my friend. Who knows? It could be my last time, might as well do it while you can… no regrets! “Hey Doc, yeah, BT is with us.” “BT’s name is Lawrence?” Alex asked me.

  BT looked at me like he was going to rip my spleen clean from my body.

  “I’m here Doc,” BT said.

  “She’s killed my wife,” Doc said, choking back the tears.

  “What about the kids, Doc?” I asked hesitantly.

  “She… she hung her upside down and then slit her throat. She made Tommy drink all of her blood as it fell… oh God!” The doc was having a very difficult time reliving the event, but he kept on going.

  “She turned Tommy,” Justin said bowing his head in grief.

  “Then, when the boy was done, she just let the zombies have the rest, like my beautiful wife was a side of beef.” Doc was full on crying, “She made me watch the whole thing. She swore she would do that to my kids… I believed her. I had to do it!” The doc was needlessly asking for our forgiveness. He did whatever he needed to do to protect the rest of his family. Who am I to judge, and I told him so.


  “Doc, you did what you needed to,” I said, putting as much commiseration into my words as I could.

  “Mike…” he paused. “I saved her. I saved Eliza.” He started crying again, or had he ever stopped?

  “Are you not happy, Michael? I once again walk among the immortals,” Eliza said gleefully.

  We could hear the doc being removed from the scene.

  “Where are those kids, Eliza?” I said menacingly.

  “Where I wish them to be,” she answered cryptically.

  That ranged from a room downstairs to a zombie’s belly.

  “Eliza,” I started.

  “Silence!” she yelled. “I owe no answers to you!”

  The force of her words pushed us all back a step or two. I noticed April looking down the wall again as that was a potential avenue of escape. Hell, so was I. Maybe the zombies would break our fall and we could run on top of their heads. It could work, I saw something like it in a cartoon.

  “This ends tonight Michael,” she said in a more even tone.

  “About fucking time!” Travis yelled.

  Tracy and I both turned to him. “No swearing!” we said together.

  “Just get on with it Eliza. I figured you to be above the theatrics,” I told her.

  She was quiet. Any chance I ruffled her feathers? I could only hope.

  “Very well, but one more thing. I have someone here who wishes to say hello.”

  “Hello Mr. T,” Tommy said in the voice we had all come to love but that no longer carried any warmth within its timbre.

  “Tommy?” I asked, hoping above and beyond any recognizable chance that it wasn’t him.

  “It’s Tomas,” he answered. The cold response sent shivers through me.

  “Is there anything from the boy we love still in there?” I asked him unsteadily.

  “Tommy died alone and in the dark, Mr. T.”

  “I’m sorry for that Tomas.”

  “So was he.”

  “What a touching family reunion,” Eliza said, her voice as brittle as broken glass.

  “Any chance of a one-on-one Eliza, me against you for the fate of our souls?” I asked. Rage burned through the fibers of my being like a wildfire sparked from a lightning strike.

  “Mistress, let me be your champion!” Durgan shouted.

  “He’s still alive?” BT asked me quietly.

  “Apparently,” I said dejectedly.

  “That could be amusing,” Eliza said.

  “As soon as you open that door, I’ll blow a hole in his friggen’ head,” I said, meaning every word.

  “Not very sporting of you, Michael,” Eliza laughed.

  “I don’t much see any reason why I should get the snot beat out of me before I die,” I told her.

  “But yet you wish to fight with me. Surely you know that there is not a mortal on this world that can defeat me,” Eliza said triumphantly.

  “I would only agree to fight you if you let my family and friends go unharmed, to live out their lives as they see fit.” “Michael, the fun will be when I kill them all one by one as you watch. I could never let them go. Perhaps we can work out a different arrangement.” “I’m listening,” What choice did I have?

  “What if I allowed Durgan to fight you? If you best him, I would allow your family and friends to go unharmed.” “And what of my husband?” Tracy asked.

  “Either way he dies, of course, and in front of his family,” Eliza answered as if this were the most insane question she had ever heard.

  “No, Talbot!” Tracy said thrusting a finger in my face.

  “Tracy, I will do whatever I can to make sure that all of you are safe.” “What makes you think she will honor her end of the agreement?”

  “What makes you think he could beat me?” Durgan yelled.

  I hadn’t thought about Eliza not following through with her promise but it wasn’t like Vampires were noted for their honor.

  “Eliza, how valid is your word?” I asked, although what was I expecting? If she lied about the first part, wouldn’t she do the same with the second? Maybe some morality would bleed through. Yup, little known fact, soulless demons can’t tell two lies in a row.

  “Cross my heart and hope to die, Michael,” Eliza said coolly.

  “Mike, technically her heart doesn’t beat and she is already dead,” Gary cautioned.

  “Thanks for that,” I told him.

  “Mike, let me fight Durgan, I’ve been wanting to bust his ass up forever,” BT said with a smile that scared the hell out of me. “I’ll fight that racist prick! I’ll be Mike’s champion!” BT yelled before I had a chance to tell him this was my fight.

  “What is this, 1634?” I said, “I can fight my own damn battles.”

  “Who you kidding Mike? He’ll kick your ass,” BT said none too softly.

  “Don’t sugarcoat it man, tell me like it is,” I replied, a little perturbed at his lack of faith in me.

  “Oh hell man, you know what I meant,” BT said, back peddling.

  “Yeah, that he’d kick my ass,” I told him crossly.

  “That’s what he said,” Gary clarified.

  “I have no beef with you!” Durgan shouted through the door, “But me and Mike have some reckoning to complete.” Durgan sounded like the coward that he was. He would only fight when the odds were clearly stacked in his favor. I was sort of surprised that he would even decide to go one on one. He probably figured that Eliza would have his back if I somehow got the upper hand. Although I doubted first that I would get the upper hand and second that Eliza cared anything about him.

  “Did he say reckoning?” BT asked. “What kind of cracker ass speak is that?”

  “I will allow it,” Eliza said as if she controlled the entire production, which ultimately she did.

  “Okay, so there’s a lot going on right now. What exactly are you allowing?” Mad Jack asked her.

  Damn, his balls must be the size of small boulders. His stock just went up in my eyes.

  “I will allow Durgan to fight Michael,” Eliza intoned smugly.

  BT shrugged his shoulders in frustration.

  “Michael, if Durgan kills you,” she started.

  “When,” Durgan said interrupting her.

  “You do that again, I will rip your throat out,” Eliza told Durgan.

  “If Durgan kills you,” she continued disdainfully, “those that you are with give themselves up willingly.” Murmurs of protests arose from the group. I couldn’t blame them.

  “I can’t speak for the people around me,” I told her.

  “You will allow my zombies onto the roof with you during the fight so that I can be sure YOU hold up your end of the agreement.” “What if I say no?” I asked her.

  “I will burn this building and everybody in it, or on it, to the ground.”

  “And when I win?” I said running my hand through my now sweating hair.

  Durgan snorted in derision.

  “If you should somehow best my champion,” Eliza said mockingly, “I will allow everyone you are with to walk away from this site unharmed.”

  “I wouldn’t trust her,” Meredith whispered next to me.

  “Will you allow them to live out their lives without your interference?” I asked.

  “No,” she answered.

  “Most likely the first honest thing she’s said,” Alex said.

  “I understand that you humans like to confer on matters of importance. I will give you one hour and then you will give me your decision,” Eliza said. I could hear her entourage heading back down the stairs, her zombies following suit.

  “Clearly the answer is no,” Mrs. Deneaux was the first to pipe up.

  “I’d really like to thank you, but I’m pretty sure it has nothing to do with my personal safety,” I told her.

  Mrs. Deneaux smirked at me.

  “Should we take a vote?” I asked the group.

  Deneaux shrugged.

  “No,” Tracy said.

  “No,” Justin
echoed his mother. I looked at him sternly but the vote was already cast.

  “Yes,” Travis said. Tracy looked at him with a smoldering gaze that said that she was going to ground him for damn near forever.

  “I don’t see what choice we have. I say yes,” Brian said. I nodded to him and received the same back.

  “If Brian thinks it’s a good idea than so do I,” Cindy said firmly.

  Perla was not dealing well with the whole proposal. Cindy went over to her and attempted to calm her down. “NO!” Perla shouted. “I am sick of seeing people die!”

  I turned to Deneaux who had walked away to light another cigarette. “You already got my answer,” she said, never turning back lest the oncoming breeze put out her lighter’s flame.

  “I will not place the fate of my children in the hands of him,” Marta spat.

  “Does that count as three votes?” Meredith asked the group.

  I shook my head no.

  Gary walked up and looked me in the eyes for a lot longer than I felt comfortable with. “I think he can do it. I vote yes.”

  “That was strange, but thanks for the vote of confidence… I think,” I told him.

  “Oh, I didn’t see anything,” Gary said. “I was just trying to instill some confidence in you.”

  “Again thanks, and don’t tell me any more.”