Star Cat: The First Trilogy (Infinity Claws, Pink Symphony, War Mage)

by Andrew Mackay

  “Dickhead,” Jelly repeated and pretended to shoot him in the face, “Pow.”

  “Stop saying that,” Tor yelled. “I am not a dickhead.”

  “She’s spot on, comrade,” Jaycee nearly choked with laughter.

  Tor buried his head in his hands, lamenting the day he ever set foot on the damned spacecraft. Of all the ridiculous and nasty events that had happened to him, being called a dickhead by a half-cat was the most humiliating.

  Jelly scraped her claws along the table as the howls of laughter died down.

  “Jamie wasn’t friend, really. More like brother. Actually, he is my brother. I miss him.”

  “I’m sure he misses you too, honey,” Wool threw her a smile of affection.

  “Maybe,” she yawned as wide as possible. Her fleetingly scary appearance stunned everyone at the table, “I’m tired.”

  Jaycee leaned over to Tripp and whispered, “I hate it when she does that. She looks so scary. Those teeth and eyes. Brrr.”

  “I know.”

  Bonnie set her spoon down on her plate, “What do you miss about being a regular cat, Jelly?”

  “Why, am I an irregular cat?”

  “You could say that,” Bonnie giggled. “You’re hardly an everyday pet, now, are you?”

  Tripp and Jaycee washed down their food with a gulp of water.

  “Hmm,” Jelly gave the question some thought, “Probably being able to lick my own butt hole—”

  SPRAASSHH!

  The two men spat out their water upon hearing the answer. Much of it hit the table and Wool’s face.

  “Ugh, really?” She wiped the water from her cheek and flung it to the ground, “That’s gross.”

  “Sorry, Wool,” Jaycee cleared his throat, “Say that again, Jelly?”

  Jelly ran the side of her arm along the edge of her plate, pushing it even further towards the edge of the table.

  “Licking my butt hole. And other parts. I hate taking showers, but I can’t reach some areas of my body, anymore.”

  “That sucks,” Jaycee said, “I know if I could do that, you’d be looking at an empty chair right now.”

  Wool kicked Jaycee’s leg under the table, “Jaycee. Don’t be disgusting.”

  “Sorry. It was just a joke. Don’t lose your temper.”

  Tripp stood out of his chair and collected up the dirty paper plates, “We’d better get some rest. This is truly the calm before the storm.”

  “You got that right,” Jaycee cracked his knuckles.

  CLICK-CRUCK-SPLATT!

  Tripp looked at Jaycee’s gloves, “That’s one hell of a bad knuckle you had there, Nayall.”

  “That wasn’t me.”

  Everyone turned to Jelly to see her plate was missing. She stared back at them, refusing to accept any liability. Then, everyone lowered their head under the table - and saw the upturned paper plate bleeding its chicken fusion across the floor.

  “Miew,” Jelly whined as the heads returned from underneath the table, “It fell.”

  “Bad girl,” Wool snapped at her. “You knocked it off again.”

  FIZZ-SWISH!

  A book-shaped holograph appeared above the table with extreme haste, “Guys, can you hear me?”

  “Manuel?” Bonnie stood up, “Yes, we’re here.”

  Manuel scanned the room and flapped his pages together, “Where are you?”

  “R and R,” Tripp said. “What’s wrong?”

  “They’re coming.”

  “Who are?”

  “The Shanta things. They’re headed for Botanix at speed.”

  “ETA?”

  “Thirty minutes, maybe less. If you were planning on getting rest, I’m afraid you’ll just have to wait till we’re all dead.”

  Jaycee walked away from the table, “Pfft, charming. Okay, girls and boys. This is it.”

  “Where are you going?” Tripp ran after him.

  “Weapons and Armory, Healy. Where my specialty lies. I might suggest you do the same,” Jaycee turned to the others, “I suggest you all do the same.”

  He lifted his forearm to his mouth and stepped out of the room, “Tor, this is Jaycee. Do you read me?”

  “Yes, I read you.”

  “Meet me at Weapons in two minutes. We’re at war,” he said, moving off down the corridor.

  Tripp turned to the others. They seemed frightened - Wool, in particular.

  “I guess this is it, then?”

  “The sun didn’t get us first?”

  “Nope,” Tripp backed up to the door, “Wool, take Jelly with you to Medix, please.”

  Wool shook her head and screwed her face with anger, “No, Tripp,” she reached into her belt and pulled out her Rez-9.

  “No? Are you defying a direct order—”

  “—I’m defying death, Tripp. Jelly and I won’t waste away like useless mannequins in Medix. We’re fighting with you,” she said. “Am I right, Jelly?”

  Gobsmacked, Tripp and Bonnie turned to Jelly for her reaction.

  “Yeah, okay,” Jelly said and rose out of her chair, “I’ll help you take out the trash.”

  Bonnie smiled at the remark.

  Tripp exhaled and caved in. What other course of action was there, anyway? Everyone would go down in a blaze of glory - together.

  Chapter 6

  USARIC - Weapons & Armory

  Space Opera Beta - Level Four

  Jaycee scanned the weapons in the armory store, “If we’re going to die, then we’re going down fighting.”

  He unlatched three K-SPARK shotguns from the wall and slung two of them over his left shoulder. He passed the third to Tor, “Here, take this.”

  “Really? You’re letting me have a weapon?” Tor thumped the side lever down and armed it.

  “Don’t make me regret this decision.”

  Jaycee grabbed the last six dumb bombs from the wall and tipped three of them into Tor’s hand.

  “I guess we’ll need some of these. You have three, so make them count.”

  Tor’s jaw dropped at the man’s generosity, “Thanks.”

  “I’m not finished yet.”

  Five Rez-9s and a spare D-REZ semi-automatic stared at Jaycee from the wall. He licked his lips and scooped them up in his arms, “Okay, that’s it. That’s all our inventory.”

  He grabbed the D-REZ and pushed it into Tor’s chest, “This is easier for you to aim with. The magazine is full.”

  “Okay,” he said, slipping the strap around his head.

  SCHWUMP!

  Jaycee threw the hatch shut. He kissed his fingertips and pressed them against the surface of the door, praying for good fortune, “Thanks for everything.”

  He stepped away and looked over his shoulder,” You ready to go down in a blaze of glory, comrade?”

  Tor ran after him. The sheer weight of the weapons slowed him down, “I don’t want to die if that’s what you mean.”

  Jaycee palmed the panel on the wall and opened the door. He clipped the five Rez-9s to his belt and snorted, “Funny how we never get a say in what happens to us, isn’t it? Viktor?”

  Botanix

  Space Opera Beta - Level Three

  Tripp stood amongst the rotten plants and stared at the flat horizon. The edge of Pink Symphony loomed against a blanket of a thousand white stars.

  “This is it,” he said under his breath, “This is where it all ends.”

  Bonnie held her Rez-9 in both hands and saw the oncoming horde of Shanta crawling over the dunes, “I figure they’ll reach us in five minutes. I’m going to kill every last one of those bastards before they kill me.”

  “Amen,” Tripp patted her on the back, “How’s your new battery holding up?”

  She reached over her neck and pressed her fingers between her shoulder blades, “Yeah, it’s okay. I’m not freaking out too much.”

  “Good,” Tripp turned to Wool and Jelly, who appeared ready for battle, “You guys okay?”

  “We’ll do our best,” Wool said.

&
nbsp; Jelly held her D-REZ in both hands and swished her tail around, ready for war, “I am a fighter.”

  Tripp walked over to Jelly and squatted in front of her, “I’m proud of you, Anderson.”

  “If Shanta doesn’t kill us, the sun will.”

  Tripp ran the back of his hand over her face, “That’s right. You’re very smart, you know.”

  “I know,” she licked her lips and pushed her gun into his chest.

  Jaycee stormed into Botanix with a range of weapons strapped to his shoulder, “Tripp, catch.”

  He flung one of his K-SPARKS at Tripp, who caught it in his arms, “Fully loaded?”

  “You know it.”

  Tripp looked at the D-REZ firearm in Tor’s hands as he walked in, “I see you trust the Russkie with a gun, now?”

  “Yeah,” Jaycee thumped the man on the back a little too hard for comfort, “I think he knows that he’s way down the pecking order of what’s going to kill us.”

  Bonnie armed her Rez-9 and rolled her shoulders. She widened her eyes at the horizon, “They’re coming. Get ready.”

  Tripp ran in front of crew and addressed them for perhaps the last time. He pointed to Jelly and made sure everyone was listening.

  “This is it. We need to protect Anderson as best we can. Every single one of us needs to return fire if we’re to stand a chance of surviving. On no account are you to leave Opera Beta.”

  Jelly nodded and pressed her baby bump with her elbow, “Miew.”

  “Setting turret, stand by,” Jaycee held his K-SPARK out at arm’s length. The grip on the gun folded out in three directions and shot downward, attaching itself to the floor, “How many of them are there?”

  “We’re vastly outnumbered, let’s put it like that,” Tripp said. “When you’re down to your last clip, use it on yourself.”

  “Last clip?” Bonnie chewed back her anger at that statement, “How many bullets does it take to kill yourself?”

  “You might miss,” Tripp said.

  Jelly’s eyes reverted to the horizon. Something strange took place, “Look, over there.”

  Everyone turned to see what she was talking about.

  “Is it… moving?” Jaycee asked.

  Wool stepped back against the wall and began to hyperventilate, “I can’t do this. I d-don’t want to die,” she said. The sweat forming over her hand caused the Rez-9 to drop from her hand. She caught it before it hit the floor.

  The stars crawled across the black sky at a snail’s pace.

  Tripp looked at the desecrated plants. The branch ends and leaves lifted toward the horizon. The grains of sand outside the broken wall trailed away and shifted.

  Pink Symphony’s surface revolved, enabling a strong pull towards the horizon.

  Jaycee felt his arms lift in front of his body, “What’s happening?”

  “Ugh, ugh,” Wool’s heels skidded across the ground, “Oh God, I’m falling.”

  “You’re not falling!” Tripp scanned Botanix for something to hold on to, “We’re spinning. The whole place is spinning.”

  “Miew,” Jelly grabbed hold of a grounded plant tray to stop herself from flying out of the room.

  In the distance, the hordes of squealing Shanta scurried even faster in an attempt to fight off the pull.

  The disc spun faster... and faster.

  Bonnie slipped and fell on her behind. The pull of the external force sent her sliding toward the sand, “Help me!”

  “Bonnie!” Tripp grabbed hold of a charcoaled plant and aimed his K-SPARK at the horizon, “Grab hold of something—”

  SWOOOOSH!

  Pink Symphony’s spinning grew exponentially as Bonnie unsuccessfully tried to grab at the ground. Her fingertips jumped off each tile as it whizzed under her front.

  Jaycee placed himself behind the turret to prevent himself from flying out with her, “Bonnie, grab the wall!”

  She rolled over to her back and bent her knees. The broken wall screamed towards her. She held out her hand and grabbed it, swinging out above the sand.

  “God damn it,” Bonnie opened fire on the approaching Shanta, “Die you vicious scumbags. Die!”

  BLAM-BLAM-BLAM!

  The thousand-strong Shanta clambered towards Botanix. A giant creature extended all twelve of its limbs and cartwheeled ahead of them.

  “Jeeeeeeeeeesus…” Jaycee thumped the mounted K-SPARK turret. It fired off a round at the enormous rolling beast, “Get some of this, you ugly—”

  BLAM-BLAM-SCHPLATT!

  The barreling Shanta exploded as the bullets tore through its central section. The pink gore splattered to the sand as its body tumbled back into the crowd of beasts.

  “Open fire!” Tripp shouted and blasted at the horde, “Keep holding on.”

  Bonnie’s grip on the wall loosened, “Agh. Tripp, Tripp, my hand… I can’t hang on…”

  “Don’t let go,” Tripp fired another round of bullets at the creatures. The bullets whizzed past Bonnie and tore into three Shanta, severing their limbs.

  They crashed against the floor and swished into the horizon.

  “Nggggg,” Bonnie grunted and continued firing at the creatures. Her fingertips traced against the wall and threatened to release.

  The relentless spinning of the disc wouldn’t cease.

  Jelly looked at Bonnie and released her grip on the plant tray.

  Tripp screamed over the incessant growling of the sun headed in their direction, “Jelly, what are you doing?”

  “Need to save Bonnie.”

  She launched herself toward the broken wall and held out her paws.

  SCHTANG-SCHTANG!

  Her infinity claws spread out into a star shape as she rocketed over to the helpless Bonnie.

  “Jelly, no,” she screamed as Jelly’s face darted toward her, “Grab hold of something.”

  “I’m coming,” Jelly turned over as she flew and fired off a fully automatic clip at the Shanta.

  BLAM-BLAM-BLAM-SPRATCH-CRATCH!

  The bullets chewed through an oncoming creature, busting its mid-section open. The pink goo coughed into the air, twisted toward the horizon and blasted toward the stars at the edge of Pink Symphony.

  Its carcass tumbled across the sand like a dead bowling ball, knocking the nearest set of beasts onto the ground.

  “Bonnie, I’m coming,” Jelly squealed and swiped at the woman’s shoulder with her right paw, “Grab my hand.”

  THUMP!

  Bonnie’s hand slammed into Jelly’s right palm. They squeezed together as Bonnie lost her grip on the wall.

  Jelly caught the side of the wall with her left claw - but the propulsive force was too severe. It banged away and sent Jelly and Bonnie tumbling out of Botanix and crashing across the sand.

  “Jelly! Bonnie!” Wool cried out after them from behind the plants. She fired a shot at the creatures.

  GRROOOWWWWLL!

  The sun grew larger and larger, throwing a Godly light into Botanix. It blinded Tripp, Jaycee, Tor, and Wool.

  “The sun,” Tor pointed at the sky, “We’re going to die!”

  “Kill everything,” Tripp shouted over the commotion, “Keep firing!”

  Botanix reverberations punched Tripp around and slammed his back against the wall, “Gaaah,” he screamed and fired a round at a dozen Shanta creatures infiltrating the broken wall.

  Bonnie slid across the sand on her back through the stampeding Shanta.

  SWIPE-STAB-SCHTOMP!

  Dozens of Shanta limbs daggered into the floor either side of her as she scraped the sand on her trajectory, “Agghhh, help meeee.”

  A few feet behind her, Jelly spread her claws out to prevent herself from the same fate.

  Bonnie tumbled forward, unable to fight Pink Symphony’s spin-pull towards the edge of its mass.

  “Bonnie,” Jelly whelped.

  She hopped onto the back of a trailing Shanta and dug her paws into its flesh. Her claws tore out of the Shanta’s skin as she launched over to Bonnie.


  Pink Symphony’s disc tilted diagonally as it spun around. It angled itself like a radar toward the approaching sun.

  SHWOOOOOSH!

  Bonnie’s waist slammed against another creature, pushing her around on her descent towards the edge of Pink Symphony.

  Jelly tumbled around and spun to her feet, “You’re not going anywhere.”

  The sand kicked up around Bonnie’s as she zipped along the sand. The edge of the disc shot towards her feet.

  “Oh God…” Bonnie rolled to her side and looked down the length of her body. Any second now, she’d fall off the edge.

  SCHWIPP!

  Bonnie’s ass hit the edge, catapulting her entire body around. She held out her hands and grabbed the edge of the rock-like surface. Her legs slammed against the edge, “Ugghhh,” she screamed and made the mistake of looking down - an infinite drop of intergalactic proportions threatened to take her life.

  Jelly slid up to the edge and pressed the butt of her paws to the ground. She stared at Bonnie and whined, “I’m not strong enough to pull you up,”

  “P-Please, Jelly,” Bonnie squealed and tried to hulk her body up to safety, “D-Don’t let me fall.”

  Pink Symphony’s spinning slowed down, forcing Bonnie’s front to slap against the cliff edge.

  A wave of terror blasted across Bonnie’s pupils. Frightened beyond belief, she was convinced she’d fall to her death.

  Jelly looked down at Bonnie’s fingers and licked her lips, “Miew.”

  She opened her paw and held it a few inches to the side of Bonnie’s hand.

  “Wh-what are you doing?” Bonnie turned over her shoulder to see the bottomless pit of stars, “P-Please, help me up.”

  Jelly viewed Bonnie’s five fingers as the enemy. She tried to fight against her instincts - to little avail.

  Her paw tapped Bonnie’s hand, trying to release her fingers, “Miew…”

  “What are you doing?” Bonnie screamed. “Don’t, please…”

  “Meow,” Jelly swiped Bonnie’s index and middle finger, releasing her grip, “I need to.”

  “Jesus, Jelly. Please, no—”

  “—Miew,” she took another swipe and tried to knock Bonnie’s fingers off the edge.

  “Nuh-nuh,” Bonnie focused on Jelly’s claw sliding under her thumb, “Oh, God. Please—”