So Fair a Lady (Daughters of His Kingdom Book 1)

by Amber Lynn Perry

  “Samuel, what’s going on?” Kitty faced him, her mouth tight.

  “This is not your affair, Kitty.” Samuel moved to grab her arm, but Nathaniel smacked it away.

  “Don’t touch her.”

  The muscles around Samuel’s eyes twitched as he stared at Nathaniel. “Come ladies, we’re leaving.”

  Thomas held his arms rigid at his side to keep from tightening his fingers around Samuel’s weak neck. If anyone manipulated Eliza it was Samuel.

  Eliza raised her head and turned her face to the beast beside her, her lips stretching in a tight smile. “Do not worry, Kitty. All will be well.”

  Thomas’s heart dried up in his chest. “Eliza, are you making your own decision?”

  Her gaze lifted but landed only at his chest. “Yes,” she said, too quickly. “I’m ready to go, Samuel. I’ll just be outside.”

  She pulled her cloak off its hook by the door and fled outdoors as if escaping a deadly fire. Kitty followed close behind. Then Samuel.

  Thomas’s knees weakened. He checked his stance to be sure he could remain erect. Nathaniel’s grip tightened around his arm.

  His vision blurred. This could not be happening. This morning all was well. Last night they were in love and eager to be wed. Now, in a matter of minutes, his life was upside down and the woman he loved was leaving in the arms of the man who’d made his life a living hell. All of Thomas’s energy collapsed to the floor and he placed a hand on the back of the chair at his side. She hadn’t said goodbye—hadn’t even looked at him.

  Thomas shot a desperate glance to Nathaniel who tilted his head toward their common enemy, his eyes narrowing. Thomas had seen that look before. Nathaniel wanted to stop Samuel and end this madness. There were two of them, and only one measly Redcoat. Thomas closed his eyes and shook his head in refusal. This was Eliza’s choice and he couldn’t compel her to stay, even though he wanted nothing more. He loved her. And if this was what she wanted, then that’s what she would have.

  “Must you leave so soon?” Nathaniel asked, moving out the door and standing next to Kitty. He cupped her elbow and peered back at Thomas as if pulling him out of the house with invisible ropes.

  Somehow Thomas found his strength and followed them into the cold. His emotions bled out, pooling on the snow-dusted ground beneath him.

  Kitty froze, and looked between all of them before her gaze rested on Nathaniel. “This is all very sudden, I know . . . I’m not sure what to make of it.”

  Samuel stepped forward, his icy eyes narrowing. “Eliza is very eager to be home, and I don’t wish to detain her in a place where she’s been so unhappy.” He hugged Eliza across the shoulders. “These girls need to get back to Boston where they belong.” He emphasized the last words and directed his glare at Thomas.

  Kitty’s eyes shimmered and her voice wavered. “Thomas, I . . . I don’t know what to say.”

  Calling upon strength from God, Thomas tried to keep his own voice steady. “I’ll always be here for you. Both of you,” he replied, loud enough for Eliza to hear. She stood with her back toward him and made no indication she’d heard.

  Samuel turned around a last time. He nodded in parting as he nudged the girls forward. A sour smile hinted across his ugly face. He took Eliza under his arm and Kitty shuffled alongside as the three of them walked toward town.

  A dragon raged within Thomas, but he was helpless to bring an end to his living nightmare. Eliza would stay if she wanted, wouldn’t she? If she were in danger she could have said something, knowing both he and Nathaniel would defend her.

  She had made her choice, and the agony of it cracked his bones.

  He walked a few steps forward and watched, paralyzed. Samuel released his hold of Eliza’s shoulders and turned his attention to Kitty.

  A whispering breeze sliced through Thomas as his gaze followed their waning figures. His heart shrunk with every advancing step Eliza took.

  Thomas kept his eyes on her, knowing she would look back. Though she may not feel the same horrid loneliness that dominated him, they had shared so much. Surely she would acknowledge him before leaving his life forever.

  The three of them rounded the far corner that led into town. Thomas’s eyes burned and his throat seized.

  She never looked back.

  Chapter Twenty-five

  The bleakness of the suppressing night compressed Eliza’s already crushed heart.

  “Well, what have we here?” Samuel sat higher on the saddle. “Seems as though the gods have provided us with the perfect resting place. We’ll make camp here.”

  Why did he have to pick this spot? Eliza groaned as she stared at the familiar cave and blinked back the rush of tears. They’d traveled all day on horseback and Eliza’s legs and backside ached from sitting sidesaddle in front of Samuel. Why he refused to take the highways and stay in the warm boarding houses along the way she would never understand. It wasn’t as if they were being pursued. Though she had a feeling Samuel believed otherwise and had chosen this as a way to avoid any unwanted company.

  She glanced beside her at Kitty who shared another horse with Donaldson. Her shoulders slumped and she rocked forward. Donaldson reached with a gentle arm and held her steady.

  “You can sleep in a few moments,” Donaldson said, his gentle voice waking Kitty enough to keep her upright.

  Samuel pulled on the reins and slipped off the horse, then reached up to help Eliza down. She shuddered as his hands slithered around her waist. Bile inched up her throat again, as it had all day and she took a deep breath to keep it down.

  “Are you feeling well, my love?” he said, before kissing her forehead.

  “How do you imagine I’m feeling?”

  A satisfied grin laced his mouth. “I imagine you’re eager to wed, as I am.”

  “You can believe that, if it gives you pleasure.” She glared and walked toward her sister.

  Donaldson dismounted and helped Kitty onto the muddy ground. The two girls walked together into the rocky dwelling. Kitty leaned into Eliza as if ready to sleep on her feet. Eliza found a smooth spot on the ground and helped her sister onto the dirt. Warm memories of their first visit to this rocky shelter flickered to life in Eliza’s mind, but she stamped them away, knowing if she entertained such images her heartache would be too much to endure.

  “I’ll start a fire,” Samuel said, coming up behind Eliza and brushing her shoulder with his hand. “Donaldson, grab those bedrolls and bring them here. We don’t want these women to catch a chill.”

  Eliza stood and looked into the beckoning forest. She wanted to run, to escape into winter’s blackness. Her throat closed, clogged with surging emotions. She brushed at her eyes to hide the evidence of tears.

  Donaldson entered, two rolled-up blankets under his arms, just as Samuel managed to start the meager fire. Without a word, Donaldson set the blankets on the hard cave floor and handed one to Eliza.

  “I hope these bedrolls will be enough for you. Your sister was quite chilled as we rode. I suggest wrapping this heavy one around her and staying close to share the warmth of your bodies. Do you need anything else, Miss Campbell?”

  “No.” Eliza took the blanket and found it easy to smile at his kindness. “Thank you, sir.”

  A deep smile crossed the man’s handsome face, before he cleared his throat. “Well, if you do need anything—either of you—don’t hesitate to ask.” He bowed at the waist and turned to assist Samuel.

  Eliza draped the blanket around Kitty, then covered herself with her own and snuggled awkwardly next to her sister for warmth while the men stayed busy on the opposite side of the cave. Sleep would not bless her with its company no matter how she willed it. How else could she suppress the wrenching guilt that plagued her? Without sleep she could not flee the memories of the man she loved—and how she’d hurt him.

  Thomas, I’m so sorry.

  The very thought of him made fresh tears scorch her eyes, and she squinted, burying her face in her cold hands under the
scratchy covering. The image of Thomas’s sorrow-covered features wove into her heart until it threatened to stop beating. She hadn’t been able to look at him—except to try and convince him that she loved Samuel. Doing so had caused her such dizziness she nearly collapsed, but her motivation to keep Thomas safe rose above all else. She recalled how his blue eyes lost their deep color and the blood seeped out of his perfect face. If she’d let her eyes trail over him or allowed herself to be pulled into his gaze, she might not have been able to protect him. Giving away her true feelings would have made him follow her, she knew it, and that was a risk she couldn’t take. Knowing Thomas was alive and could someday lead a normal, happy existence was her ultimate motivation. She loved him more than her own life and prayed with all her strength that somehow he would know it.

  I know you’re a talented little actress, Eliza, Samuel had said. You must make Thomas believe you don’t want him, that you want me instead. Because, deep in your heart I know that’s what you want. Don’t try to warn him or send him any kind of message. I’ll be listening. If he so much as follows us, he’s dead.

  Samuel’s words swirled like a whirlpool, pulling every remaining hope into its endless spiral.

  She prayed she’d done well enough—that Thomas had believed her charade and would leave them be. She wondered if his heart ached as fierce as hers. Walking away and not looking back was the cruelest moment she’d ever endured. Making her legs step one in front of the other had been like walking through thigh-deep mire. How she managed it, she still didn’t know.

  A slight east wind lacerated her cheeks as it swept into the cave and her body shook again. This was her future now. She must accept it.

  How could life change so quickly from greatest joy to the greatest of sorrows?

  On the long ride, Samuel informed her that they would be married a week from tomorrow. He loved her so much, he said, he didn’t want to waste time.

  Seven days.

  Pulling the blanket over her head to shield herself from the icy breeze, Eliza bit her cheek so hard she tasted blood. Her life was coming to an end, and worst of all, she was to blame. If she had taken Thomas’s wise counsel and stayed away from that formidable rally, then none of this would have happened. Samuel might never have found them and she and Thomas could have lived and shared their love to the end of their days.

  Forgive me, Lord, for what I’ve done. I tried to make things right—to make a proper choice and learn why Father did what he did. But now, I see I have failed yet again.

  Eliza rolled on her side toward the fire, and writhed on the hard ground, her bones pressing her flesh into the unforgiving bed of solid earth.

  Samuel fussed with the small fire and humphed, grumbling curses under his breath.

  Eliza moved back the blanket and peeled her eyes when he rose and walked to the other side of the cave. In the dim light she could only distinguish a faint outline of both men. Donaldson stood over the fire, warming his hands and appearing to ignore Samuel’s presence.

  “Eliza and I will be married tomorrow week.”

  Donaldson turned a disinterested eye at Samuel then gazed again at the growing fire. “So you said.”

  Samuel approached him. “I have one more task for you.”

  “I told you, I’m no longer your pawn.”

  Samuel’s voice lowered even more, and Eliza strained to hear above the popping of the fire. She peeked quickly at Kitty. Thank the Lord she’d found peace in sleep.

  Samuel leaned into Donaldson, heat searing his words. “If you want to continue your military career you will do as I say. Your sister’s medicines need to be paid for, and if I remember correctly, you supply the money, do you not?”

  Donaldson cranked his head sideways, his tone low and heavy with malice. “So you’ll blackmail me as well?”

  “I wouldn’t have to, if you would simply do as I ask.”

  Eliza couldn’t see his face, but Donaldson’s stance showed his rage. “What is it?”

  “Once we get back to Boston and Eliza and I are wed, you will return to Sandwich. Burn Thomas’s house, his barn—everything.”

  Dear God! No! Eliza slapped a hand over her mouth to shelter her gasp.

  Donaldson whipped toward Samuel and grabbed his collar. “Never.”

  Samuel shoved Donaldson into the spiny cave wall.“You have no choice! I suggest you follow my orders.”

  “You’re the devil,” Donaldson seethed, shoving Samuel at the shoulders.

  Eliza clenched her eyes and bit her lip again until the familiar taste of blood trickled over her tongue. She choked on the lump in her throat and clenched her arms around her stomach, trying to keep down the acid that surged in her belly.

  Oh, Lord what have I done?

  “You have to go after her, Thomas.” Nathaniel sank into the Windsor chair across from Thomas at the lonely table in the kitchen. “You’re a fool not to.”

  The dark sky outside grated on Thomas’s thin nerves and matched the despair that swirled within him. Eliza had been gone for more than fifteen hours, but it seemed to him like three lifetimes.

  “Perhaps I am. And yet, I cannot do it.” Thomas ground his teeth together, picking at the day-old bread Eliza had made.

  Nathaniel’s face curled. “You know she loves you.”

  “She never said she loved me.”

  “Did she have to?”

  Thomas sat back and wiped his hand across his mouth, trying to erase the memory of her kisses. Uncompelled, images of her walking away from his life slipped into his pain-clouded mind and rested there like an unwanted guest. “She never looked back at me, Nathaniel. She never said goodbye. If she wanted me to help her, to rescue her—if she wanted to stay here, she could have found a way.”

  Nathaniel pushed out of his chair and walked to the back of it, resting one hand on the upper rail and pointing with the other. “That man is a . . .” He snapped his jaw closed and shook his head. “And you’re even worse if you believe she is such a woman—to love you one moment and desert you the next.”

  Thomas jerked up and clenched the bread in his fingers. “I don’t know what to believe, Nathaniel.” He stared at the bits of mangled bread. “How can I live a full life without her?”

  Nathaniel let out an exasperated groan and raised his hands in the air. “You don’t have to live without her—why can’t you see that?”

  Thomas grunted and pushed away from the table. “Quiet, Nathaniel, or I’ll be forced to throw you out.”

  He moved from the kitchen into the parlor, reliving the times they’d read to one another, talked, and shared memories. Thomas closed his eyes and could almost feel the slope of her waist, the velvety texture of her skin. He could smell the rose in her hair and taste the sweetness of her lips. The refrain of her gentle voice rang in his mind like the far away bells of a church steeple.

  Nathaniel exhaled and sat in the largest chair in front of the fire. “If I know you as well as I know anyone, and I do, then I know you’ll come to your senses and decide to go after her before too long.”

  Thomas’s frustration crested. He pulled his fingers through his thick hair and growled, stomping his heel into the floor. “Nathaniel, I told you, she didn’t want me to go after her. Didn’t you see her? Did she act like a woman in love to you?”

  “Yes she did.”

  “Are you mad?” Thomas said, ire and confusion melding into poisonous fumes in his chest. “She refused to meet my gaze. Didn’t say a word to me, except to explain she loved Samuel and couldn’t wait to get out of my sight and back to Boston. That doesn’t seem like something a woman in love would do.”

  Nathaniel rested one ankle on top of his leg, fixed his eyes on Thomas and played absentmindedly with the buckle on his shoe. “Then I’m afraid you don’t know much about love.”

  Thomas cupped his hand over his mouth and exhaled through his fingers. It appeared as though he didn’t, yet his heart ached with such raw pain he believed he knew plenty about love.


  He knew it could kill a man. A slow, horrifying death.

  Nathaniel went on. “I didn’t see as much as you did, Thomas, but from what I witnessed, the truth was clear. If she didn’t care, she would have been able to look at you and bid you a civil farewell, if nothing else. It pained her too much to do so. Don’t you understand? I’ve been around the two of you enough to see the starry-eyed longing in her eyes when she looks at you. She’s protecting you. Somehow Samuel is making her do what she’s doing. You must see that.”

  Could he be right? Could Eliza really have been trying to protect him?

  No. Thomas shook his head. “You think very highly of yourself, Nathaniel, but in this case you’re wrong. She wanted to rid herself of me. In the end, it’s better for her that way.”

  Nathaniel launched out of his seat and planted himself in front of Thomas, glaring. “I’ll say it again, Thomas.” His angular features hardened. “I know you are distressed about your past—you’ve had a rough one, but you must leave it at the feet of God. You’ve done much good for many people. Eliza most of all. You’ve done your best with a wretched situation and no one could ask for more. Leave your disquiet behind.”

  Thomas kept his jaw hard as granite. “Are you finished preaching?” He curled his fists and breathed from his nose. How dare his friend advise on issues in which he had no business?

  “No, I’m not finished preaching, but I’ll stop there.” Nathaniel paused and shared a caring smile. “I will bid you good evening.”

  He grabbed his cloak and hat, opened the door and turned to Thomas. “Think about what I said. I know you’ll find bits of wisdom, even though I won’t expect you to admit it. And you know where to find me . . . when you come to your senses.” He tapped his hat on his head and stepped into the dark.

  Thomas closed the door and exhaled loud and harsh, still feeling the heat of their exchange. The revelatory truth of Nathaniel’s words seeped into his mind and trickled into his chest. He slumped into the largest chair and sat motionless as the painful emotions slithered over him like hungry snakes. Thomas closed his eyes. The thought of Eliza being forced to do anything against her will made his muscles cramp—especially when it was at the hands of Samuel. Nathaniel might be right when it came to his past, but he couldn’t be right about Eliza.