Cup of Life

by Juliana Haygert

  “Speak,” Mani said.

  I took a deep breath. “I’ve made a deal with a human. A Soul Oath. She offered her life, her soul, in exchange for her wish. I plan on bringing her back to life after it’s done.”

  “You can’t,” Nay said. “The Soul Oath won’t allow you to alter or break the deal, not even after it’s done.”

  I started pacing. All right. I had thought as much, but I needed confirmation. I hoped I was wrong. Seeing as I wasn’t, I told them about plan B. “The water of the Lake of Life heals deities, right? So it should do more for humans, like grant eternal life? If I give her the water of the Lake of Life, she should be able to cheat death.”

  “No,” Lavni said. “That water is made for deities only. If a human drinks it, she’ll die.”

  “Wait. But Levi drank it.”

  “For one, he drank a small amount, just enough to give him a little strength. Second, his body was human but not his soul.”

  There went my plan B along with any hope I had.

  “There must be something I can do,” I muttered. Keeping my cool in front of the witches was harder than I thought it would be.

  “You shouldn’t have accepted Nadine’s deal,” Mani said. “Now it’s too late.”

  Determination was a beautiful thing. I halted and stared at them. “No. There must be something I can do.” They looked at each other, and I knew I was getting somewhere. “Please. Nadine can’t die. Not now, not ever.”

  “Why?” Lavni asked.

  Why? The question caught me by surprise.

  I thought of her. I thought of Nadine, how beautiful she was, how her touch wreaked havoc inside me, how her kisses set me on fire. However, there was more to her than just the physical stuff. She was loyal, just, kind, dedicated, strong, and completely selfless. To me, she was perfect.

  “Because—”

  “You love her,” Nay said.

  Did I? I hadn’t loved anyone in so long. In fact, other than my human parents, I hadn’t loved anyone ever. Did I love Nadine? Maybe. Probably.

  “I just ... can’t bear to think of living forever when she can’t. My existence won’t mean anything without her.”

  Mani narrowed her eyes at me. “And that’s not love?”

  “Perhaps,” I said. Why was it so hard to admit what I was feeling?

  “What if she doesn’t want to live forever?” Lavni asked.

  Oh. Oh. I hadn’t actually thought of that. I mean, who wouldn’t want to live forever? Nadine, attached to her family the way she was, wouldn’t.

  My shoulders sagged. Here I was, trying to find a solution for a problem that didn’t exist. Damn it.

  But ... but if I found a way of making her immortal, I could tell her about it. I could show it to her and ask her if she wanted it. Of course, I would try to sell immortality to her, even though I already told her it was lonely at times—but it wouldn’t be lonely because we would be together. In the end, it would be her decision.

  “I promise I won’t force her,” I said. Her rejection would hurt like the pit of fire in the underworld, but I would never force her into a life she didn’t want.

  “You shouldn’t interfere with this,” Lavni said.

  “I don’t care,” I said, hearing too well the begging tone in my voice. “Please, tell me there is an alternative. Tell me Nadine doesn’t have to die.”

  The Fates looked at each other again. Mani and Nay rose from their seats, and the three of them joined hands, closing their eyes. They were communicating, seeing the future, or whatever else they did before reaching a decision.

  They opened their eyes and stared at me.

  “There is a legend,” Nay said. My heart raced at her simple words.

  “Thousands of years ago,” Mani started, “a human found the Lake of Life. She was about to drink from the water, expecting to find immortality, when a lesser god, one of the Lake of Life protectors, entered the cave and saw the woman. He told her the truth: she was a simple human, and because of that she would die after drinking the water meant for gods. However, the protector became instantly enchanted by the beautiful woman and promised her he would find a way to make her immortal. He took a golden cup and filled it with the water from the Lake of Life. He went on a difficult series of quests. In the end, he was able to the turn the water from the lake into an immortality elixir for humans.”

  A glimmer of hope bloomed in my chest. “Wait. What was this difficult quest? What did he do?”

  “The details of his quests aren’t to be known, for this action is not to be repeated,” Lavni said, sounding exactly like an evil witch.

  “But if I don’t find out about his quests, how I am supposed to—?”

  “The story isn’t finished,” Nay said. “Listen.”

  I shut my mouth, impatience and anger rolling in my stomach. I blinked, focusing on my hope instead.

  “The protector brought the cup back to the woman. She drank from it and became immortal. However, immortality didn’t go well with her personality. She also wanted power. So it was her turn to go on a quest and strike a Soul Oath with Imha.”

  I gaped. “What?”

  “The woman promised the protector’s life in return for powers. Imha accepted. The woman fulfilled her part of the deal and received powers from Imha.”

  “But ... I don’t understand.”

  “The woman didn’t drink all of the elixir. It is said she still has the cup and the immortality elixir. She calls it the Cup of Life, and she offers it to whoever wants it.”

  The glimmer of hope became a bright light inside me. “So, it’s simple. I only need to find her.”

  “Yes and no,” Lavni said, ripping at my hope. “There’s a price. The woman, Nasya, only gives a sip of her water to those who pass her test.”

  The balloon of hope in my chest deflated a life. “What kind of test?”

  “She chooses the test after meeting with the one who wants the cup,” Mani said. “She tailors it accordingly.”

  I inhaled and exhaled, trying to remain calm. “I must meet her. I must find out what kind of test she’ll ask of me. But ...” I raked my hand through my hair. I grimaced, still not used to how long my hair was now. I dropped my arms and sighed. “I have to find her first.”

  “We know where she is,” Nay said.

  I froze. The ribbons of hope in me grew again. “Then tell me.”

  4

  I was ready to leave the Fates’ cottage and go directly to Nasya.

  However, I had a duty to my creed, so I transported back to New York to talk to Levi, Ceris, and Izaera. Besides, I already missed Nadine. I could use one of her smiles before leaving to face the mysterious test.

  Fuck. She probably wouldn’t smile at me since I sneaked out of her bed before she was awake. Or maybe she would smile, glad I had been gone.

  She complained about my mixed feelings more than once, but she also sent me mixed signals. One minute she was allowing me to get close, and the next minute she was clipping my wings. I knew I shouldn’t advance on her, but whenever I threw caution out the window and tried to get close to her, her mood was hard to read.

  Before entering the apartment, I sensed Nadine and Keisha training in the improvised gym. Damn. I would never get past them unnoticed, and I needed to talk to the other gods first.

  I sent a quick mental message to Levi. “Arriving. Meet me in your room with Ceris and Izaera. No one else.”

  “You aren’t in trouble, are you?” he asked, invading my mind.

  “Not yet.”

  “By the Everlast.” Then he was gone.

  Taking a deep breath, I stepped into the apartment. As I suspected, the gym’s door was open. Nadine—in tight yoga pants and a cropped blue bra top that did nothing to hide her gorgeous curves—and Keisha sparred with wooden swords. I stopped for a second, admiring the view. Nadine was getting better at combat, her movements fluid and sure, her posture and footwork nearly perfect. Her hair, pulled up in a ponytail, swished around her b
ack, a wave accompanying her elegant moves. She was a vision.

  And I was wasting time.

  Shaking my head, I silently closed the front door behind me and started walking to the corridor.

  Zelen appeared from the kitchen. “Morning, Lord Mitrus.”

  Oh fuck.

  Nadine’s arm went slack, her eyes shifting from her opponent to me, and Keisha almost hit her on the chest with her sword.

  “What the—?” Keisha followed Nadine’s line of sight. Her eyes widened and she bowed. “Lord Mitrus.”

  I groaned on the inside. How I hated these formalities. “Morning,” I said, nodding at them.

  Nadine didn’t say anything, but she didn’t need to. I saw the hurt flashing in her gaze before she put on a steel mask. She held my stare, trying to prove to me she didn’t care.

  “Mitrus,” Levi called me from the corridor. “We’re waiting.”

  “Right,” I said, averting my eyes. I followed him down the corridor and entered his bedroom.

  Ceris sat on the edge of the mattress, and Izaera took the chair in front of the vanity.

  “What is it?” Ceris asked, always to the point.

  Well, how to start it? What the hell, I was wasting time. “A month ago or so, I made a deal with Nadine,” I blurted out.

  “A deal?” Levi asked, sitting beside Ceris.

  I took a deep breath. “A Soul Oath.”

  “What?” Levi shouted.

  “So that’s the deal I heard you two talking about at the volcano.”

  Levi turned to her. “You knew about this?”

  Izaera shook her head. “No. I heard Nadine and Mitrus talking about a deal. I never thought it could be a Soul Oath.”

  “What did you promise her?” Ceris asked. “And what did she promise you?” Her face was deadpan, but her tone betrayed. She was worried.

  “After ... after her family died, Nadine didn’t want to live anymore. She even asked me in a teasing manner if I could kill her. But she wasn’t teasing. She needed a reason to live, and she found one. She would learn how to fight and help us defeated Imha because she wanted a better world. Her motivation? After we win the war, I’ll bring her family back to life in this better world.” I paused, finding it hard to continue. “And she offered me her soul in exchange for theirs.”

  Levi cursed, Izaera puffed, and Ceris looked at me with hard eyes. “You did what? No, you’re not that stupid. You didn’t accept it, right?”

  “I told you I made a deal with her. Yes, I accepted, but I thought I could find a way around it, you know, being the god of the dead and death and all.” I sighed. “But it isn’t that simple. I went to see the Fates this morning.”

  “By the Everlast, this keeps getting better and better,” Levi muttered.

  I told them everything the Fates told me. About how I couldn’t undo what the Soul Oath had done, how the water of the Lake of Life wouldn’t cure her, and about the legend of the Cup of Life.

  “I’m going to Nasya’s island,” I said.

  “Wait a minute,” Levi said. “I don’t think I heard you right. You’re gonna risk your life for a human?”

  I frowned at him. “I thought you were all about humans.”

  “I am, but you aren’t. Weren’t. What is it?”

  A knowing smile adorned Ceris’s face. “Oh, but Nadine isn’t any human to you, is she?”

  I closed my mouth and held her stare. “No, she isn’t. Besides, I’m a god. I can’t die.”

  “That’s not true and you’re proof of it,” Izaera said.

  “Yeah, but I came back to life.”

  “At what cost?” Izaera shifted her gaze to the dark world outside the window. “We don’t have another thirty years to wait for you. Moreover, the Fates confirmed your soul was lucky for awakening inside a human body. Next time you might not be lucky, and your soul could be lost forever.”

  “She’s right,” Levi said. “You know that in order to have a well-balanced world, we need all of us. Together. Alive.”

  “I know, I know. But I can’t let her die. I just ... can’t.”

  “I’m not sure about this,” Levi said, shaking his head.

  Irritation swam where hope had been a couple of hours ago. “What is your problem? You’re against it because you had a thing for her? Now that she kicked your ass and you went back to Ceris, you want her dead? Is that it?”

  “Mitrus,” Ceris called, a warning in her voice.

  “You’re taking things too far.” Levi raised his hands, palms to me as if offering peace. Peace my ass. “I don’t wish anything but the best for her, but it was her wish. She wants to die. You should respect that.”

  “If it was four, five months ago, if she still cared about you the same way she did then, would you respect her wish?”

  He stared at me, but I could see the conflicted emotions in his eyes.

  Izaera spoke up. “Let’s say you go to Nasya. You pass her test, and receive the Cup of Life. What will you do? Just show up here, open Nadine’s mouth, and make her drink it? You have to consider she might not want it.”

  The same thing the Fates said. What was this? A sign I shouldn’t even try? Fuck that.

  “I know,” I said. “I’ll bring her the Cup of Life and tell her what it is. I’ll tell her she’ll be able to live while her family is alive, and—”

  “But after her family has died, of old age or sickness,” Ceris said. “Do you think she’ll still want to live then?”

  “I don’t know!” I shouted. Remembering the others could possibly hear us, I lowered my voice again. “I guess I’ll talk to her about all the possibilities and hope she chooses to drink from the cup.”

  “Meaning, you’re hoping she chooses you,” Levi added.

  I glared at him, ready to jump at his throat.

  Ceris rose. “You’ve changed, Mitrus. These past few months you have changed a lot. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it is a good change. I attribute that change to two things: your human family and Nadine. If she can touch your heart like that, make you a better god, a more just and kind god, then you have my support. Go forth, bring the Cup of Life back, and convince her of joining us in eternal life.”

  We all stared at her. Along with my bugged eyes, my mouth hung open.

  “Everyone is surprising me today,” Levi said.

  Ceris had her half-smile back. “After knowing Nadine for over a year, I can attest she’s a good person. A great person. It saddens me she and I aren’t friends anymore, and she only puts up with me for the war’s sake. Hopefully, she’ll accept the elixir from the Cup of Life, and I’ll have more time to earn her forgiveness.”

  Holy fuck. I almost asked Ceris to repeat all that so I could record it and play it back to Nadine. If I was surprised, she would have a heart attack.

  “It’s not a question of who she is,” Izaera said. “She seems like a great person, yes, but is she worth Mitrus risking his life?”

  No hesitation here. “Yes.”

  “His mind is set, my sister,” Ceris said, her eyes on me. “He’s telling us out of courtesy, just so we know where he’ll disappear to. He’s going no matter what. We better support him now.”

  Wow. Way to leave me speechless, and here I thought Ceris could be as evil as Imha sometimes. Perhaps I was wrong.

  Levi sighed. “When are you going?”

  “Now?” I said. “As soon as I leave this room and say goodbye to Nadine.”

  Izaera stood and patted my shoulder. “I’m not against this adventure, but I’m not in favor of it either. Just make sure to come back in one piece.”

  I nodded.

  Levi grabbed my hand and shook it. “If this is what you want, then I’ll respect your choice. Good luck, my brother.”

  My brother.

  I hadn’t heard that in centuries.

  With a small smile, I shook his hand back. I looked at the three of them, relieved they understood me and energized they supported my decision, even if they didn’t agre
e with it.

  As odd as it was, they were my family and their support did matter.

  5

  I rushed out of the bedroom and into the living room. Zelen had pushed the coffee table to the side and was meditating as usual, as Keisha ran on the treadmill in the gym. I walked around Zelen and peeked inside the gym.

  Keisha tripped and almost fell. “My Lord.” She bowed her head in an awkward way so as not to trip again.

  “You’re alone here,” I said. It wasn’t really a question since the room wasn’t that big and I could see every corner of it.

  “Yes. Nadine left a few minutes ago.”

  I glanced back to the corridor. Nadine’s bedroom door was open. If she had been there, I would have noticed when I walked past it.

  “Do you know where she is?”

  “She mumbled something about fresh air and stomped out of here,” Keisha panted.

  “Thank you.”

  I hurried out of the apartment and flew down the stairs. I opened the building’s front door, stepped out, and bumped into her. It felt like nothing more than a simple nudge, but Nadine slipped back in the snow. I grabbed her hand and kept her steady.

  “Sorry,” I said at the same time she said, “Thanks.”

  “My pleasure, darling.”

  She slowly pulled her hand from mine, but she didn’t break my stare. And we didn’t move either.

  Her cheeks were flushed, her ponytail was half-undone, and small fluffs of snow covered her hair. By the Everlast, she was pretty. Beautiful. I could stare at her all day.

  She shivered. She had a heavy jacket on, but apparently it didn’t do much as she was shrunk under it.

  I stepped aside. “Get out of this cold, darling.” Pressing her lips into a thin line, she entered the building, shivering. “If you’re still cold, I can warm you up.” I wiggled my eyebrows at her, trying one of my old tricks. I figured remaining the same cocky guy would be welcome.

  Not so much.

  Shaking her head, Nadine started walking to the stairs. No, no, no. I wanted to talk to her before she left. Before I left. But what could I say to her?