Avoiding Commitment

by craziebabe45

  "What the…" he said turning around sharply.

  "Jack," she cried stopping him in his tracks. His expression shifted quickly from surprise to delight to anger and then settled at indifferent. It all happened so fast that, had she not known him as well as she did, she certainly would have missed what was going on in his head.

  "Lexi."

  "Can we talk…privately?"

  "Now isn't really a good time," he said pulling her closer to him so they could speak without anyone else hearing. She hovered inches away from him.

  "I think now is the only time," she muttered staring up into blue eyes.

  "Why would you say that?" he asked his brows furrowing together.

  "Jack, I'm just…confused. Please," she begged.

  He glanced around the hallway checking to see who might notice them leaving together. He was an expert of becoming invisible, sneaking around, and not getting caught. All things she had been a source of in his past and now, she reluctantly realized, was forcing him into all over again. After he confirmed that no one was watching them, he said, "Fine. Follow me."

  Lexi followed him around the corner and through a side door that led to a long concrete walkway. She had never been here in the past, but she assumed this must be the staff exit or even an exclusive exit VIP Braves members used while within the private 755 Club. Jack closed the door behind them and led her away from the door.

  "Lexi. It's my birthday. This couldn't have waited until tomorrow?" he asked crossing his arms over his chest and standing before her. His stance made him appear distant and unapproachable…not the way she typically viewed Jack.

  "No. I don't think that's such a good idea," she told him hesitantly.

  "Well I do. I don't have time for this right now." The words came out but he didn't move. She felt as if he had said that he didn't have time for her rather than time for this…whatever this was. He had no clue what she wanted to talk to him about unless he knew how she was feeling. But she highly doubted that, since he was the one screwing with her emotions.

  "Well make time. I need to ask you some questions," she told him firmly.

  "Now?" he whined. "It's my birthday."

  "It's past midnight," she told him checking her watch just to verify. Actually, when she looked down, she noticed that it was twenty minutes until midnight, but she didn't mention that fact.

  He rolled his eyes. "Fine. Ask away."

  "Is this still what you want?" she asked her voice trembling.

  "Lex, baby," he murmured taking her in his arms and hugging her against him, "didn't I tell you that you are what I want?"

  She sighed against his body. She didn't like that he was evading her question with another question. Why couldn't he just answer straight up? "That's what you said three days ago, but Jack I'm leaving in two days. What are we going to do after that?"

  "We'll work it out. I just need time. You have to understand. Bekah and I," he sighed trailing off.

  "I do understand that you have been together for some time…without my distraction. But how can I be sure that I'm not just that…a distraction?" she asked her eyes pleading with him. She had never felt so rigid against his body. He wasn't calming her as he usually was. In fact, the way his body language read, he was only causing her more grief. Even his baby blue eyes, which normally held so much warmth and desire when cast upon her, were almost icy. She didn't know what was going on.

  "You have to just trust me. I've never lied to you before," he muttered glancing towards the door.

  "Jack, what's wrong with you?" she whispered staring up into his blank face.

  When he next looked back at her, the Jack she knew and loved had returned. His eyes looked hungry. It was a look she knew well. His body had relaxed into her even pressing her closer to his. She had to gasp just to breathe properly with how wildly her emotions were being pushed around. One minute he was icy cold and the next he was on fire. She couldn't keep up.

  "Nothing is wrong with me," he spat the words out.

  "I just mean the way you were looking at me…" She shuddered.

  "Lexi, really I don't have time for this," he said eyeing the door again. "I really need to get back inside." He began to walk away from her back towards the door. She knew she had kept him out here too long, but he hadn't answered any questions. He hadn't done anything but shift moods too frequently for her to count.

  "I thought things were going to be different," she muttered stopping him with his hand on the door. She just couldn't help herself. She needed to know what was going on, and if the only way to do that was to elicit a reaction from him, then so be.

  He turned and faced her. "Things are different."

  "It doesn't feel like it. It feels just like every other time." Hurt crossed his features at her accusation.

  "Look just get off my case," he said turning back towards the door.

  "You can't even look at me," she cried knowing she was being completely unreasonable. She just felt as if she were about to burst. She couldn't think of another way to get through to him. All she needed was some sort of answer one way or the other. A part of her knew that she wasn't being fair. He deserved time to figure out what to do about Bekah. Another part of her thought she had given him enough time over the past six years to figure out if he wanted another girl or not and that she needed an answer.

  He turned around and walked slowly back to her standing only inches away from her, but not touching. "There I'm looking at you," he said his blue eyes staring purposely into her brown ones.

  "You'll never change," she snarled. She couldn't believe the words had come out of her mouth. She had been thinking them all along, but the words struck too close to home for their relationship.

  "Maybe I already have," he growled back walking forward and pushing her forcefully against the cement wall. His hand reached down, hitched her left leg up around his waist, and pushed himself against her. She could feel his erection jumping to life as the adrenaline pumped through their bodies. Her black silk thong brushed against the crotch of his charcoal suit pants causing both of them to shudder with desire.

  His blue eyes thawed upon catching her gaze. He leaned forward, pressed his free hand against her bare neck pulling her head away from the concrete barrier, and brought her face less than an inch from his own.

  "Uh Jack," she whispered unable to break his steady gaze. He leaned forward his breathe hot on her face. For a split second, she could see herself giving into him right then and there. She could break down all those walls of sexual tension and give him back the control he so obviously desired. It would be so easy just to let go. He was what she wanted after all. Why did it have to be wrong to get what you want?

  "Shh," he said covering her mouth with his own. He let the kiss be soft, yet urgent. She sighed against his lips letting them part and his tongue to enter her mouth. The kiss turned feverish and she found that she had pushed her fingers up through his thick hair pulling him closer to her. His desire was growing every second he stood with her opening close to him. She couldn't even think properly with the way he had her positioned. His hand had pushed the red material of her dress away from her thigh, cupped her bare ass, and hoisted her other leg up around his waist. He pushed against her then slowly, almost teasingly rubbed himself against her.

  Lexi groaned not sure how they had ended up in this position, but she didn't care. She had resisted him so long, and it was just painful to stay away from him. Even when her mind allowed her the moments where she wasn't thinking of him, he was always there in the back of her mind. And here, in the present, she couldn't imagine anywhere else she wanted to be.

  He bit her lip a little harder than intended and she knew she would have a bruise the next day. Right now she just enjoyed the pain mixing with the pleasure of his hands running across her breasts and fluttering across her erect nipples. Lexi reached between them unfastening his belt, popping the button open and shaking the zipper to the bottom. Her hand trailed the length of him through his cott
on boxer briefs. She felt him gasp and he shoved himself against her harder than before.

  She reacted instantly reaching into his pants and grabbing a hold of the shaft. It lengthened in her hand and he groaned deep in his throat. His hand fumbled for her underwear, ripping the gentle material in his haste to slide them to the side, and pushed his thumb against her clit. He moved his mouth from her lips to her ear and throat roughly biting, sucking, and nibbling as she squirmed against his chest.

  Convulsions were overtaking their body, their desire heightening as each second of public fornication dragged on.

  Jack abruptly stopped his kneading of her, grabbed his dick in his now wet hand, and forcefully pushed inside of her. Lexi's head snapped back against the cement wall not even feeling the pain as his erection filled deep inside of her. She clenched her muscles around him unable to believe how incredible he felt. He let his head fall between her breasts breathing a few deep breathes of desire. Then he lifted his head up and began thrusting inside of her. She gasped at his forceful demeanor. He refused to take it slow as he vigorously pounded into her body. He filled her over and over again. His movements were unrelenting, and she almost cried out, she wasn't sure if it was with pleasure or pain, but he covered her mouth with his hand. Lexi felt the orgasm take over her body. She tightened around him her body shaking with pleasure, but he never let up. Even as the waves of passion took over her body, he continued inside of her holding out on his orgasm so she could have another.

  When she finished, he shifted his hands to a position where he could haul her up and slam her back down onto him. She moaned into his ear as she felt all her weight pushed against his dick as he invaded her deepest core. Her back was chafing against the wall, but she couldn't care less. She wasn't the one who had spent several hundred dollars on the dress. Lexi couldn't believe he was holding out so long, she was almost ready to go again, and his determined, beautiful face looked as if he could go all night.

  Just when she thought she might explode again, he abruptly stopped with just the head hovering over her opening. She felt her body react with yearning and she got even wetter. He smirked at her and reclaimed her lips with his own. She volleyed with his tongue whimpering as he paused over her. "Jack," she groaned wiggling her body hoping, praying he would move.

  He pushed in a fraction of an inch before pulling back out. She whimpered again breaking contact with his lips and glaring at him. His smirk turned into a full on smile as he leaned into, pushed the head in, and stopped. "Did you want something?" he asked the words coming out breathy and desirous. It was obvious that he wanted it too.

  She nodded.

  "I can't hear you," he responded pulling back out of her and moving around in a circle over the sensitive lips.

  She moaned deeper trying to push her body against him, but he had her hips firmly between his hands and wasn't letting her have any control. "I said I can't hear you."

  "Jack," she moaned as he dipped in and out of her again. She didn't want to beg, but she needed him to finish. She was on the brink of a sky-rocketing explosion. He waited teasing her endlessly until she spoke again. "Get inside of me…now," she commanded.

  Her words worked like magic and he couldn't hold out any longer. He forced himself back into her opening and continued his insistent pulsing. She felt like she was going to burst at any second. Her lower half was throbbing with pleasure, and her chest was heaving as her heart raced along ahead of the rest of her body. She closed her eyes and arched her back against him allowing the deepest angle he could reach.

  "Cover my mouth," she murmured feeling a scream bubbling up in her chest.

  He complied easily. Just as his hand came up covering her mouth, they both exploded. He shoved her body down onto him one last time. His eyes rolled back into his head as they came together. By the time she was spent, she found that she was gasping for air and her body trembling.

  After a minute of recovery, Jack pulled himself out of her and quickly readjusted his pants. Lexi slumped against the wall. Her shaky hands yanked her dress back down to its rightful length. Her underwear was ruined beneath the material.

  "Jack that was…amazing," she whispered into the night air. She brushed her sweaty curls off away from her face. She watched as he wiped his hand across his forehead taking the thin layer of sweat with it.

  "Yeah it was," he said walking towards the door. "But I have to go."

  "That's it?" she asked her voice wavering uncertainly.

  "What? That wasn't good enough for you?" he asked his voice echoing a hint of humor into every syllable.

  "That's not what I mean."

  "This doesn't change anything Lex," he said turning to face her but staying a good distance away from her as if he couldn't control himself not to take her again.

  By the way he said it, it sounded as if it changed everything. She was his again, his for the taking. "I think it changes things. You can't go back to her after that," she squeaked.

  "I'm not sure what I'm going to do."

  Lexi gasped. "You mean…"

  "Look, I don't know what to do yet. I just knew that's what you wanted," he saying eyeing her mussed appearance.

  "That's not what I wanted."

  "If it wasn't, you wouldn't have let me do it," he told her simply.

  "I wanted answers."

  "And I don't have any."

  "So what was this?" she asked tears welling in her eyes. How had this turned south so fast?

  "This was fucking Lexi. You should know that. You're really good at it."

  His words were cold and calculated as if he were trying to hurt her. It was working. "Fuck you Jack."

  "Whenever you want."

  "So this is over?" she croaked.

  He seemed utterly surprised by this conclusion. "No, baby," he said striding towards her and taking her face between his hands. She didn't even have the energy to push him away. "I just need more time. This was…great, but it doesn't change things. Now I really have to go." And with that he strode out of the hallway and back to his birthday party.

  Happy birthday to him.

  Lexi stayed outside for a minute contemplating how she had allowed things to get so out of control. She had promised herself she wouldn't let this happen, but when push comes to shove, literally, she couldn't say no to him. If she were to do it all over again, she'd make the same goddamn mistake. That was the part that miffed her the most. She knew that she should look at it as a mistake, but she couldn't. He had said that it didn't change anything, but she knew deep down that it changed everything. If he could have her like this, would he want her any other way? It was a question she had wrestled with for a long time, and still to this day she didn't know the answer.

  She bit her lip in her consternation and cursed loudly forgetting that Jack had bit down hard on the sensitive tissue. The one thing she did know is that she needed to get away from this place. She didn't care where she went as long as it was far away from here.

  Lexi quickly darted back into the bathroom, shimmying out of her sodden, destroyed underwear and chucking them into the trashcan. She pulled her knot of curls out of the messy bun that looked like a disaster after having been scrapped against a cement wall. She applied a thin layer of clear lip gloss hoping that would cover the bruise that was forming, but she doubted it. She assessed her neck noticing a few red marks beginning to form where Jack had been too violent, but she didn't have any concealer and hoped no one would notice as she snuck out.

  There was no way she could atone for her dress though. The back looked like well…it had been dragged across cement. Some strings were hanging free from the material. The silky fabric was dotted with scuffs that resembled a bathing suit bottom after sitting on the edge of a pool for too long. Not to mention the scratches that covered her upper back where her hair had been held high. She would never be able to explain those. Luckily, her back hadn't bled, but some of the scrapes were so red she was certain had he gone on any longer, they would have. She just ho
ped her long hair would hide as much as possible.

  After deciding nothing more could be done, she snuck back out of the bathroom and made a beeline for the exit. When she got there, she ducked through the double doors and stopped as she almost ran smack dab into Ramsey. She didn't even know how long she had been gone.

  "Where have you been?" he asked concern evident in his voice. "It's twelve-twenty. I've been searching for you everywhere. I had just decided to see if any cabs had taken you home, but no one knew anything. Are you alright?"

  His green eyes were wide with worry. She knew she should feel guilty, and maybe a small part of her did. Ramsey was starting to grow on her and he seemed so genuinely concerned. But this was the last thing she needed after what she had just done.

  "Uh, yeah…" she trailed off not meeting his gaze. "Sorry."

  "It's fine. I'm glad you're alright," he said scooping her up into a hug. She bit back a cry as his hands brushed against her red, swollen back.

  "I have to get out of here," she muttered abrasively. "Can you call me a cab?"

  "Where are you going?" he asked hesitantly trying to meet her eyes.

  "Back to the hotel."

  "Alright. You have a key right?" he asked just to make sure. He snapped his fingers at the concierge to begin to make arrangements.

  "Oh shit," she cried. "Chyna lost the other one and I gave her mine. I have to go find her." She turned to make an embarrassing reappearance into the club.

  "She's already left," he muttered stopping her from leaving. "I think she is going to his place."

  "Fuck!" Lexi could not believe her awful luck. She couldn't stay here any longer, but there was no way she could go back to the hotel. "I guess I can see if they'll make me a new one," she muttered hopefully.

  "Just come back with me," Ramsey said tilting her chin up to him. She did not want him to be in her personal space right now. He was too intuitive and would surely notice her bumps and bruises. She didn't want him to ask questions. If she woke up in the morning with scrapes, bruises, and hickeys all over her, he was going to know something was up, because he certainly wasn't going to be given the opportunity to touch her in that way.