I’m pretty sure I’m close to peeing myself right about now.
“His scent is all over this! My God, you don’t waste time do you? How many back up ‘plans’ do you have? How many guys are lined up for you? For fuck sakes, Angel! I’ve been defending you everytime Talon said shit about you. He’s right though, the fates did make a mistake. What the hell happened to you? You weren’t such a whore when we first laid eyes on you.”
I feel the tears slipping from my eyes as I stand there speechless listening to his horrible words. He slams the glass on the floor and glass shatters everywhere. He storms past me again, but bumps me harsher this time with his shoulder and I fall onto the broken glass. My hands stop my fall, and I move so that I’m sitting on my knees, now looking at bloodied hands. Both my knees and hands are cut up and I’m pretty sure there’s glass inside, but I don’t feel the pain because the pain in my chest hurts too darn much. I cover my face with my bloodied hands and cry hard.
“Shit baby...” I hear Talon’s soft voice, as he bends down and runs his hand through my hair gently and lovingly. “Please don’t cry... he’s just angry.” I push him away from me. I don’t need this back and forth shit right now. He’s going to make me want to crawl into his arms only for him to throw me away again. I can’t do it.
“Just go,” I say through sniffles, but he doesn’t move.
I push him harder and scream, “GO!” His face is frozen, but he nods his head and leaves through my bathroom towards his bedroom.
I get up on shaky legs and make my way to my bedroom door. I’ve got my cries under control and I need to get out of this house. I sneak down the stairs and head towards the backdoor. As I pass the gaming room I spot the bar and backtrack. Should I? shouldn’t I?
“I think I should,” I whisper through snivels. I grab a half bottle of Tequila, walk out the back door and towards the lake.
Dropping my ass on the edge of the little wooden dock with my feet over the end, I look up at the dark night sky. I let tears fall down the sides of my face and feel them trail towards my ears. I close my eyes, drop my head and take a big sip. I cough and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. I have two small cuts on the palm of my hand but the bleeding has stopped. My knees are another story though. There’s definitely shards of glass in there.
“Fucking disaster,” I mutter to myself, taking another gulp of the strong liquid. Then another, and another, until my eyelids close of their own accord.
****
I’m being lifted; he’s so strong and smells so good. He’s walking and walking until finally I hear the opening of a door, then he’s walking again. I hear the steps as he walks on the wooden floor, then I hear the opening and closing of another door.
I’m barely conscious as I feel my shorts being pulled down my legs. My eyes are too heavy and I can’t open them. The alcohol may still be coursing through my system, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t a dream. I moan and try moving to get comfortable on the soft bed.
“Shh... Let’s get these cuts cleaned up for you, baby,” he says in a comforting voice, as he bends down and kisses my forehead gently. I fall back into drunken bliss wishing that Talon would treat me this way when I am sober enough to respond... and remember.
Chapter 10
“You seriously need to watch where you’re going, Angel. If any wolves from other packs see that you’re not healing they’re going to think something isn’t right with you,” Nixon says, inspecting the little cuts on my hand. I told him I walked into the vase and dropped it. I haven’t told him about the dreadful argument with the twins because he’d want to confront them. I haven’t told him about the little after- party I had by myself either; I don’t even remember finishing the bottle of tequila. I woke up early and surprisingly felt better than I had the day before. Leaving early, I went for a run in the woods for Faith then stopped off at Nixon’s, where I am currently sitting at his kitchen table while he makes me breakfast.
“I know, Nix. That’s what I’m worried about. Caspian saw the bruise and asked me about it. Luckily you saved me from answering, but maybe people will just think I’m weak?” I say hopefully.
“No way, your power is fixed into your scent. You’re definitely powerful, babe,” he says, handing me a plate of bacon and eggs.
“Where is all this power then, huh? I don’t feel very powerful at all,” I mumble to myself as I dig in.
I spend the afternoon with my mother watching movies in the theatre room while dad tends to pack business. She gives me the same speech Nixon gave me when she sees my cuts and the bruise on my forehead.
“Your father and I have been invited to stay with a pack down in Cartersville for a week. They’ve been having trouble with rogues entering their territory, so the Alpha has asked your father to come and check for any faults in their current security operations. Jacob is staying here to keep an eye on things while we are away, and we think it’s safer for you stay here too at the moment,” Alex says, putting some ointment over my cuts. When she’s done she lounges on my bed and pulls a magazine onto her lap.
“I understand.”
I don’t want them to go without me. I don’t want to be around the twins while they’re away, but I don’t let her feel my uneasiness. “I think I’ve had enough of other packs for a while.” I smile at her.
“Speaking of other packs…” She continues grinning. “…Caspian seems to have taken quite a liking to you, sweetie.”
I turn around, sitting on the bed next to her with folded legs, paging through the magazine she’s suddenly forgotten about. “He freaks me the hell out. He’s all moody and evil looking and the way he stares at me is like he…”
“Wants to eat you up?” She blurts out, giggling.
“Mom!” I gasp, and start laughing.
“It’s true though, everyone can see it. That man is drawn to you. Your Daddy used to look at me that way too,” she says, smiling as she pulls my long damp hair over my shoulder and starts braiding it.
“Dad still looks at you that way, and besides…you two were mates. It’s different.” I murmur.
“Well Cass lost both his mates and now he’s looking again, and you haven’t found your mate yet so...” she pushes and I can’t help but recoil at the mention of me not finding a mate.
“What?” she asks.
“Nothing, Mom.” I swallow the lump in my throat. Even though I want to spend as much time with her as I can before she leaves for the week, I know she will start digging and asking questions and I’m not ready for her to know the answers to them just yet. I pull my phone off the side table.
“Look at the time! It’s already eleven, I better go to bed if I wanna wake up early to join Dad in the gym.”
I move off the bed and open the covers making sure she gets the hint.
She kisses my forehead and gives me a hug before leaving my room and shutting the door behind her. I let out a deep breath thinking about how I’ll ever be able to tell them about everything I’m keeping secret. I don’t want to see their disappointment, and what if they’re so ashamed that I couldn’t even get a mate to accept me. Will they regret welcoming me to be a part of their pack? Or worse, welcoming me into their family
****
The next morning I wake up early like I promised Dad, spending two hours with him in the gym and out in the woods. My parents leave an hour after breakfast and I head off to town to meet up with Nixon for lunch. I successfully manage to parallel park my car on the side of the street without bumping the front of my car, or without pulling off my rear bumper on someone else’s. A job well done I’d say - pat on the back for me.
The smile on my face immediately drops when I enter the little bar. Across the room sits my mates laughing with “their girls” close by. Nixon calls me over, and when they hear my name their heads whip in my direction; smiles gone and faces blank. I feel them pulling me, trying to get into my head, but I won’t let them. I turn finding Nixon seated at the bar with two plates of food in front of
him.
“Why’d you ask me to come here?” I grumble. I sit on the bar stool and chomp on a fry angrily.
“You can’t avoid them forever. You need to show them that you’re not going to wallow and sit waiting for them to come around. You’re going to live your life with or without them in it,” he says, taking a big sip of his beer.
“Easy for you to say, you don’t have to sit and watch your mates cuddling up to their girlfriends from across the room whilst your wolf begs you to go to them. This is too hard, you don’t understand.” I stuff my face with the cheeseburger in front of me.
“That may be true, but I can’t sit and watch you avoid them anymore. That’s weak and you told me you aren’t that weak little girl any more, isn’t that right?” He knows he’s got me there. I so wanna stamp my foot like a child right now.
I take another bite instead.
The bartender asks me if I want a drink, but Nixon turns him down and orders a soda for me. I roll my eyes. When I hear Talon’s deep chuckle from across the floor I order a vodka…and soda. The bartender quickly brings it to me then winks; smiling, I wink back. When I hear two low growls from behind me, my mood instantly lightens.
Nixon chuckles and shakes his head. I try my hardest to ignore the boys and have a good time chatting to Nixon, but after a while the giggling and deep laughter gets louder. I turn to see Talon holding Lucy close as he whispers in her ear. Tyler is having a full on make out session with Kate, as if he can sense me, he pulls away from her then looks at me, grins then winks. I let out a breath, shake my head to get the sad thoughts out. I look down at my hands then back up to Tyler, his smile is gone and his face full of regret.
I turn back to look at Nixon who looks at me sadly. “They’re dicks, babe. I’m sorry for bringing you here. It was stupid of me, I can’t imagine what you’re going through.”
“No, Nix, it’s cool. You were trying to help, but if we don’t leave right now I’ve got a feeling that Faith is going to rip this place to shit. I can feel her huffing and puffing within me, she’s jealous and hurt.”
Nixon tells me to wait by my car while he pays. I head out and take in the fresh air. There’s a physical pain in my chest from watching the boys with Kate and Lucy. I’m starting to wonder if maybe I should end all of this; I’m not quite sure it’s worth all this pain, especially If I’m going to be rejected in the end anyway. I take a seat on a bus bench and rest my elbows on my knees. My wild hair covers my face as the wind blows, I don’t even care about how I look to the people passing. I close my eyes, listening to the cars go by and trying to get my wolf to calm down.
I jump when I feel a hand grab my shoulder. I immediately know who it is by the little goosebumps going up my arm and the butterflies in my tummy; his sweet scent gives it away too.
“I’m sorry Angel, you don’t have to leave. I’ll stop,” Tyler says in a soft caring tone.
I shake my head and move away from his touch. He balls his fist as if he’s about to reach out for me again, but he doesn’t.
“I can’t sit there and watch you two together. Isn’t this distance between us hurting your wolf? Or is it only mine that’s dying inside?” I ask him genuinely, I swear I can hear his wolf whimpering.
“It’s hard for me too, Angel. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I can’t stop lashing out at you. Half the harsh things I’ve said I don’t mean; I’m just so angry and confused,” he says, looking down and noticing the cuts and plasters that adorn my knees.
“Is th..that from me? Did I do that last night?” He bends down in front of me and reaches out for one of the plasters, but I slide toward the other side of the bench and move away from him.
“I… I need to apologise for last night. I barely got any sleep, it’s all I could think about. You tried to talk to us, but we completely dismissed you without allowing you a chance to talk. It’s our fault, we shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions, Angel. I’m so sorry… Talon is too. I don’t know what to do, Angel. I’m caught in between and don’t know who to choose-”
“Angel, you ready?” I see Nixon standing by my car calling me. I look over to where Tyler is still kneeling and stand up. I force my eyes to look back at Tyler as I walk past.
“Maybe you won’t need to make a choice,” I say, ever so softly. I watch as the blood drains from his face.
“What does that mean?” he asks loudly, but I continue walking away.
“Angel!” He yells out, making a few of the people walking down the street stop and stare.
“What is that supposed to mean?” He calls out once again. Nixon opens my car door for me and I climb in. I don’t look behind us as we drive away.
We spend the rest of the day running around the woods in our wolf form. I need to let Faith diffuse her anger and cool down, and I know how much she loves exploring the woods. Nixon decides to head home when the sun starts to set, but I’m not ready to head back to a home surrounded by people I hardly know, so I stay out in the forest.
****
Sitting by the lake, I think about the friends I left back home… My old home in Point Bright.
I want to see them, I miss them so much. I miss Ronny’s constant teasing and Chloe’s sweet nature, I even miss the company of all my friends when we hung out together at Frankie’s pack house. There was never a quiet moment with them, I never felt alone, and that’s all I seem to be feeling lately… Alone.
I know Nixon has been trying, and meeting Axel too has helped take my mind off a lot of things. I guess I just miss hanging with girls. Boys deal with their emotions differently, its hard talking to Axel or Nixon about what I’m going through with the twins. They’re super hard and tough when it comes to “sappy” things, but it does make me want to try harder to be just as tough.
It’s only later that night when I reach the little waterfall hidden in the woods in Point Bright that I realise what I’ve done.
I’ve crossed territory lines.
Standing on the boulder, I turn to leave, but freeze when I hear growling from behind me.
“What are you doing on our land?” his voice echoes in my mind as the memories play out.
I turn to look at him.
Drake’s wolf is still as beautiful as ever, his hazel eyes standing out against his brown coat.
I move to dash past, but he halts my movements standing right in front of me, our noses almost touching.
“Speak!” He says, using the authority only a Beta has. I know this because it’s strong and I can smell the power on him. It’s not nearly as strong as the power an Alpha male wields though.
Realising that Jax has kept him as his Beta, even after what Drake put me through upsets me somewhere deep. A palpable sense of betrayal, even though I was the rejected mate.
His teeth are bared and his eyes turn dark. I shiver as the memories flood in.
I take a step back.
I know what Drake is capable of. I know the type of evil that is hidden beneath all that beauty, but I won’t let that scare me this time.
I move to run past him, there’s no other way out but in his direction. He blocks me with his large body.
“Speak to me, wolf or so help me God I will rip you apart limb by limb,” he draws out in a deathly snarl.
“Move!” I say, staring at his eyes as they immediately turn back to their usual brown. He no longer snarls, and I can sense the surprise I’ve just given him as he takes in my voice.
I take the opportunity and bolt past him. I run and run hearing his steps behind me.
I end up at the old trailer park I used to live in. The lights are on and I can hear the sound of the television inside. I don’t have time to stop because Drake is on my tail… literally.
I make it to the opening of the woods and follow the road making sure to keep myself hidden in the woods from the cars driving on the road. I don’t know how long I run, but I can feel it in my bones, I’m close to my territory. Faith is telling me we’re close.
I can no longer hear
him behind me so I turn my head and look back.
He’s gone.
I slow my pace until I’m standing still. I do a full turn looking around through the trees, smelling the air, and trying to catch his scent.
Just as I catch a whiff of it and am about to flee, I’m tackled to the ground by an enormous weight.
“Get off me!” I growl, communicating to him. He’s a big wolf just like any other full blooded male werewolves, so I’m unable to force him off me.
He stands over me, focusing intensely on me. “It is you!” I hear his whispered thoughts.
“Yes, it’s me! Get off me, Drake.” I kick my back legs and he stumbles. I roll onto my four legs and try lifting myself up, but Drake climbs back on top of me. I feel something sharp tugging on my neck. Not piercing the skin, but it’s enough to make me keel and roll over in submission; just the way he always wanted me.
“If I let go, will you stop trying to run away?” He links to me.
“Yes,” I lie.
He slowly lets go of my neck and looks down at me. I turn my head when he moves to lick my face. It doesn’t stop him, he licks me then breathes into my neck.
“God, I’ve missed you.”
“Get off me, Drake. I need to get back,” I say, nudging him. He doesn’t budge.
He lets out a deep growl and looks me in the eye. “Get back where? If you think I’m going to let you run away again, you’re sadly mistaken.”
I hear a loud roar behind us, then Jax’s voice echoes into the night.
“You don’t have a say in that matter, now do you Beta.”
Drake’s body turns stiff over mine. He looks down at me then back at Jax before quickly moving off of me. I roll over so I can see what’s happening behind me.
Angel Blackwood Page 12
