For the Sake of the Children
Page 9
She’d convinced the children to do the dishes, but now she had no more excuses left.
So what, then, was she supposed to do with a group of rowdy children who’d been eagerly waiting to meet their newest family member?
“Want baby Ma-few!” Milly tugged at her skirt.
At least appeasing Milly would be easy enough. She was too young to understand that there was another baby besides Matthew.
“Why don’t you check on him? But be very quiet.”
He’d wake the second Milly opened the door, but he needed to wake up now or else he wouldn’t take his afternoon nap. Now that he’d finally started sleeping, Rose had been taking care to keep him on a schedule that allowed the family to have some sort of routine. A nice change from how things had been since his birth.
Life almost felt normal.
A knock sounded at the front door. With Frank at Mary’s, Maddie had gone to the mission to make sure they had everything they needed for the day.
Rose wiped her hands on her apron and answered the door. “Hello.” Rose smiled at the Garretts. “I wasn’t expecting you.”
“Silas said we could visit with Millicent in the mornings, did he not?”
Mrs. Garrett’s tone was more brusque than usual, and Rose wished she’d been more welcoming instead of questioning their presence.
“Yes, of course. Please, come in. Have you breakfasted?”
Mr. Garrett nodded. “The hotel does a very nice one in the mornings.”
“They do.” Rose gestured toward the parlor. “When we first arrived in Leadville, we stayed at the Rafferty for several weeks, and I must say, it has the finest restaurant in Leadville.”
“It’s passable,” Mrs. Garrett grumbled.
“I will own that nothing beats home cooking, and I certainly wouldn’t trade any of the meals we share here for what the Rafferty has to offer, but at least it’s not terrible.”
Rose didn’t know why she bothered trying to defend the hotel, especially since Mrs. Garrett merely harrumphed at her words. But Mr. Garrett nodded, and his face lacked the hostile expression that seemed to be plastered to his wife.
“Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll find Milly for you. We’re still in a bit of an uproar this morning, with Mary having her baby last night.”
The Garretts didn’t comment as Rose led them into the room. With a heavy heart, she remembered Silas’s concern that they were still grieving the loss of their daughter and grandchild. Perhaps their hostility was borne more out of their pain than out of her original assumption that they simply weren’t nice people.
She turned to them and gave them what she hoped was a compassionate look. “I’m very sorry if our family’s happiness brings up painful memories for you. I want you to know that you have my deepest condolences over your loss. Annie was a lovely woman.”
A few weeks ago, she would have choked on that last sentence. In truth, Annie had been very pretty. And though she would have never described the other woman as being a nice person, after hearing Silas talk about her, Rose felt more kindness toward a woman who did the best she could with a life she probably didn’t want. Besides, Annie had been Milly’s mother, and Rose owed it to Milly to find good to share with the little girl.
“I would think you’d be dancing in the streets, now that Silas is free to marry you,” Mrs. Garrett snapped. “You have him. Why must you keep Milly too?”
The words stung, mostly because a couple of years ago, they would have been true. Sometimes having to face the person you used to be was the hardest part about becoming someone new.
“Silas and I aren’t getting married,” Rose said quietly. “I harbor no ill will toward him or Annie for their marriage. From what Silas tells me, they had a good life together, and for that, I’m very grateful to Annie.”
As the words tumbled out of Rose’s mouth, she realized the truth that resided in them. Without Silas’s marriage to Annie, neither Rose nor Silas would be the people they were now, and there was nothing on earth that could induce Rose to want to go back to who she’d been.
“Rosey!” Milly came tearing into the room. “Evewyn won’t let me hold Ma-few!”
Rose caught the little girl in her arms. Just as she could not regret the mistakes that had led to Matthew’s birth, she could not ask to change anything that led to having Milly in her life. How was it possible to love another human being not related to you so quickly?
“Slow down, Milly. I’m sure Evelyn will let you have your chance. But first, say hello to your grandparents. They’re here to visit with you.”
Milly turned and glared at them. “I no want visit. I want to pway.”
“We’re going to see the Jacksons this afternoon. But you must behave yourself and use your best manners with your grandparents. They’ve come a long way to see you, and they miss you.”
Her lower lip jutted forward as she appeared to consider Rose’s words. Last week, Milly hadn’t been allowed to play with Moses one afternoon because she’d gotten in trouble.
Milly took a step toward her grandparents. “You pway wif me?”
Mrs. Garrett looked horrified. Mr. Garrett looked confused. If what Silas had told her about the older couple’s interactions with Milly was true, they probably had no idea what it meant to play with a child. What had the couple been expecting would happen in a visit?
Kneeling beside Milly, Rose said, “I don’t think they know any of your games. But I’m sure if you get your storybook, they would love to read a story to you.”
Milly turned to her grandparents. “You wike stowies?”
The older couple looked perplexed, but Milly didn’t wait for their answer. She ran out of the room to get her book.
“I hope that’s all right,” Rose said. “You can certainly do whatever activity you like with Milly, but I thought I’d break the ice with something I know she loves.”
Mr. Garrett nodded slowly. “Thank you. I don’t know much about such young children.”
Mrs. Garrett glared at him but said nothing.
Milly returned, carrying her favorite book, a worn primer meant for teaching early readers their ABCs. Though Milly was far too young to learn her letters, she loved hearing the rhymes over and over. Most of the family had grown tired of reading it to her because she wanted to hear it so much.
“Dis one.” She handed the book to Mrs. Garrett, who looked at it distastefully.
“It’s tattered. Surely you teach her to take better care of her things than this.”
Rose took a deep breath to deflect the criticism. “It was that way when she got it. I believe it was one of the pastor’s from his childhood. He and his wife spent many years living in mining camps, teaching people how to read. Many hands have touched that book.”
“Really?” Mr. Garrett looked perplexed. “Why would a man of God spend his time teaching people to read?”
“People in mining camps live such a transient existence, following the gold or silver to the next discovery. Many places don’t have a church or even a preacher. Uncle Frank wants people to be able to read God’s Word for themselves, so that when there isn’t a preacher available, they’re still able to study it.”
“Extraordinary,” Mr. Garrett said as Milly clambered onto his lap.
Uncle Frank’s plans were extraordinary, which was why they were spread so thin at the mission. Uncle Frank didn’t think it was enough to simply feed, clothe and shelter those in need. When they’d been given an old barn to convert into space to use for the women displaced by the brothel fire last year, Uncle Frank set up classes and activities designed to help the less fortunate better their lives. The family helped out where they could, of course, but they had more people wanting to take reading classes than they had teachers.
Rose spent a good amount of time there herself, not that sh
e’d share that information with the Garretts. After all, the children Milly played with at the mission were children of the lowest parts of society. In Rose’s estimation, still good playmates, but likely not anyone the Garretts would approve of.
In some ways, the mission, or at least the need for it, was Rose’s fault. When she’d run off with Ben, at the time thinking him a respectable man, he’d brought her to The Pink Petticoat, a notorious house of ill repute. He’d promised Rose that it was only temporary, but she soon learned that Ben was a liar, and she was held prisoner. Will, Jasper and Mary had to rescue her, and they accidentally burned the place down in the process.
The town saw the destruction of such a place as a blessing, one less house of sin. But for the working girls, losing all of their belongings in the fire as well as their livelihood was devastating. Though some found work in other establishments, Uncle Frank used the fire as an opportunity to give the ladies a chance at a new life.
Sometimes, Rose felt like it was all her fault—the lives ruined by her selfishness. She’d told Uncle Frank, and he’d merely told her it was as in Genesis, that what had started as something bad, God used for the good of saving so many lives. Their previous lives might be over, but God brought something better to them.
What good was God going to bring out of all this? Mr. Garrett had put his arm around Milly, patiently reading the words she pointed to. But Mrs. Garrett still wore the expression of someone who’d spent too much time sucking lemons. Would she allow Milly to add some sweetness to her life?
Helen entered the room, carrying a tea tray. “I saw you were busy with guests, and Maddie isn’t back from the mission yet, so I thought I’d help out by bringing refreshments.”
“Thank you, Helen, that’s very kind.” Since their talk last night, Helen had been more helpful than ever, and it seemed like, for the first time, her sister wanted to partner with her to make things run smoothly.
Then Rose turned to the Garretts. “Shall I pour, or would you prefer I leave you to your leisure?”
“You may go,” Mrs. Garrett snapped, dismissing Rose as though she were merely a servant. And, she supposed, given that she was Milly’s nanny, that is exactly what she was to the older woman.
But how else was Mrs. Garrett supposed to treat her? Rose thought back to the older woman’s angry accusations and how she thought Silas should just give Milly to them. To see Rose as a legitimate person who loved and cared for Milly as her own meant that taking the child away wasn’t the right thing to do. Rose shook her head. No. As much as she loved Milly, she had no part in the conflict between Silas and the Garretts. Milly wasn’t hers, and she had no claim in Silas.
But still, Milly wasn’t like a person’s favorite horse, which could easily be replaced. She was a human being, and she’d already burrowed her way into hearts that would be devastated if the Garretts took her away.
Which was why, despite Mrs. Garrett’s unkindness, Rose would do everything in her power to help everyone get along, and for the Garretts to see that this was Milly’s home. Though she didn’t relish the idea of entertaining the cross old woman for the rest of her life, the only way to make everyone happy was for these visits to go smoothly.
* * *
Silas trudged up the steps to the Lassiter house after what had ended up being too long a day at work. It had been tempting to sleep at the mine, as he’d done on occasion, but though his body was weary, his heart was even more so. He’d left this morning before Milly had risen, and though she’d be asleep now, he wanted to at least look at her beautiful little face.
Acknowledging his loss to Rose had served to make the deep love in his heart for Milly even stronger. What he most wanted to do was hold his daughter and cherish the fact that he still had her.
The house was mostly dark, but when he entered, Silas heard a noise in the parlor.
“Hello,” Rose whispered, gesturing at the bundle in her arms. “Matthew is having a rough night, but I finally got him to sleep. Busy day and too much activity, I think.”
“Oh?” He leaned against the doorjamb. “What happened?”
“The Garretts had a visit with Milly this morning, and then Emma Jane was feeling ill, so instead of going to her house, we spent the afternoon at the mission, which was a good thing, because I hadn’t realized how shorthanded they were. But that changed Matthew’s routine, and he spent all evening fussing.”
Rose yawned, closing her eyes briefly. Even in the dim light, he couldn’t help but notice how, despite her exhaustion, she still looked lovely. Her hair was down, but in a long braid that fell over the front of her shawl. Though Matthew was wrapped in a blanket, Silas could see his head resting on her bodice. So charming, the scene could be a painting gracing the halls of the finest museum.
“How did the visit with the Garretts go?”
Rose opened her eyes as she gave a wan smile. “As well as can be expected, I suppose. Milly brought them books to read, which Mr. Garrett did in earnest, but Mrs. Garrett spent the whole time alternating between looking cross and complaining. They’re coming back tomorrow, though, so perhaps it will get easier once we’ve established a routine.”
“I’m sorry this is so difficult for you. I just don’t know what else to do. Giving them time with Milly seems like the right thing to do, but—”
“It is the right thing to do.” Rose shifted her weight in the rocking chair. “Mrs. Garrett said some very unkind things to me today, about my being glad Annie is dead, and I realized that you were right when you said that they’re grieving.”
She looked up at him, her gaze settling on his face. “I’m not glad that Annie is dead, and I would not have wished her fate on anyone. I just thought you should know that.”
“I would have never thought that of you. Mrs. Garrett was wrong to accuse you.”
It seemed unfair that Rose had to be the one to deal with Mrs. Garrett’s hostility. Not when it was Silas who deserved it. He shook his head. No, he didn’t deserve it, either. But the older woman was hurting, and she needed someone to blame. Even if it wasn’t right.
“I know. But she has no other outlet for her grief.”
Silas’s chest warmed, and he felt a smile curl his lips. “Funny, I was just thinking that. I appreciate your willingness to see past the barbs for what they truly are.”
“It’s what’s best for Milly.”
“I agree.”
Rose yawned again, then rubbed her eyes with her free hand.
“You should go to bed.”
She shook her head. “Every time I lay him down, he wakes up crying. But he likes being held like this, so I’m just going to spend the night here. We’ve done it enough times. Milly’s upstairs with Nugget again, so she’ll be fine without me.”
Matthew made a sound and Rose adjusted the blankets around him. “He’s so sweet. I think he’s having a good dream. His little lips are moving, and he has a smile on his face.”
She pressed a kiss to the top of the baby’s head. Something in Silas’s heart swelled. How could Rose not see what a wonderful person she was? He’d never met a more loving woman when it came to children. Even Annie, whose love for Milly he never doubted, had never seemed so full of the kind of joy Rose possessed when she was with the children. Even when she was so obviously exhausted.
“You’re a good mother,” Silas said, wishing he could go into the room and brush his lips against the face of a woman so serene that she seemed almost unreal.
“Thank you.” She smiled softly. “It’s been a hard day, and I appreciate the encouragement.”
“What else happened?”
Despite his wish to go to bed, Silas slipped into the room and sat in one of the chairs.
“Milly threw a fit because we didn’t go to Emma Jane’s to play with Moses. Daniel got in trouble in school for fighting with one of the boys. Nugg
et and Bess wouldn’t stop arguing. Maddie was no help because with all of the family either indisposed or traveling, she was at the mission all day. Uncle Frank had an emergency in one of the mining camps to tend to, and he’s not even back yet.”
Her voice sounded weary, resigned. She hadn’t sounded so dejected since their time in Ohio. Back then, all he’d ever done for her was listen, though when things were really bad, he’d find a way to send a basket of food to the house. It hadn’t been much, but he’d done his best to ease her burdens. Even though things weren’t the same between them, he’d still like to help her now.
“I’m almost afraid to ask about Helen and Evelyn.” He kept his tone light and was rewarded by a soft smile on Rose’s face.
“They were a big help, actually. My talk with Helen last night seems to have brought on a deeper willingness to cooperate on her part. Usually, she’s the one arguing about why things have to be done a certain way, but she was wonderful in doing everything I needed. So how was your day?”
Silas looked at Rose. “Long. We had a piece of equipment break, and I couldn’t leave until it was repaired so they could start work again first thing in the morning.”
“Is fixing equipment your job?”
“No. But making sure everything runs smoothly in your brother’s absence is. It’s important that I be there to oversee something like that, so the workers don’t think he’s an absentee owner, the way some of the mine owners are. There, the workers take advantage.”
Rose nodded thoughtfully, like she understood his words, or was at least trying to. “Isn’t that what Polly’s father does?”
“In part. He knows the mining aspect well, but managing the operations gets to be too much for him. That’s why Joseph separated the jobs and gave this one to me.”
“That makes sense,” Rose said. “I know Polly’s father wanted to spend more time with his family, especially now that Polly is married.”
When Annie had been alive, they’d never had conversations like this. Mundane things, really, but they’d never given each other details about how things had gone in their lives. He’d ask about her day; she’d say it was fine, and then they’d switch places. Sometimes he’d come home to see Annie with eyes puffy from tears, but he’d always accept her answer that she was fine.