Girth

by Savannah Rylan

  “Wait. Shouldn’t we talk about Hugh first?” I blurted. Girth stopped in his tracks and looked at me again. His golden brown eyes were narrowed and focused on my face now, drinking me in as he stared. The expression on his face was that of being burnt and I could sense that he was not in the mood to discuss Hugh, but we needed to get it out of the way.

  “What about him?” he asked, and his voice was a deep grumble again. I felt my throat go dry and I gulped.

  “I want you to know that there is nothing going on between us,” I said and clasped my hands together.

  Girth gritted his teeth but said nothing. Instead, his face remained turned to me and his eyes roamed all over my body. The silence between us in my house was deathly and I couldn’t control my urge to fill in that gap of silence. I stepped towards him again and his nostrils flared angrily.

  “Seriously, Girth, Hugh is a friend of my dad’s. He has been for a very long time and I can promise you that nothing has ever happened between us. All he feels towards me is a brotherly sort of affection,” I said and Girth shook his head lightly and looked away from me.

  “If that is what you think, then you’re being foolish, Lila. The man has feelings for you, and I can assure you that they are not brotherly ones,” Girth said and I stepped closer to him.

  “Maybe he does, I don’t know. I don’t spend enough time with him to know what’s going on in his head. All I know is that I feel nothing for him, do you believe me?” I was pleading with him and I didn’t even know why. This was unlike me. I never begged a man to give me his attention. If Girth wanted to leave after we had sex, then I should have let him. I didn’t owe him any explanation, but I couldn’t help it. I was drawn to him. I wanted to know that something more could happen between us. That there was still a chance.

  “What does your father think of him, Lila?” he asked and for a few moments, my words were caught in my throat. He’d caught me out, I didn’t like the answer to his question if I was going to be honest with him.

  “Daddy doesn’t know me the way he thinks he does. In his head, Hugh is the ideal man for me, but that’s not what I think,” I said and Girth shook his head and drew in a deep breath.

  “Your father is right, and he does know what is best for you. You should trust his instincts,” Girth said.

  “Trusting his instincts nearly got me killed!” I screeched and he ran a hand through his hair.

  “No, it didn’t. That was a mistake and now he’s doing everything he can to rectify that mistake. But trust me, in this matter with Hugh, he’s completely right. He is definitely the better choice for you and I don’t have the right to be jealous,” Girth said.

  His words sent surges of electricity up and down my spine. He was admitting that he was jealous! And he was also claiming that he didn’t deserve me, which wasn’t true.

  “Girth, you’re being unreasonable. You don’t even know Hugh!” I screeched, in an attempt to change his mind, but who was I kidding? Girth didn’t look like the kind of guy who would be affected by a little girlish squealing.

  He stepped away from me, backwards, in the direction towards my house’s front door.

  “Fine, if you don’t want to talk about Hugh, then maybe we should talk about how you need to keep your hands off me so that you don’t get shot in the head,” I said and crossed my arms over my breasts.

  Girth stopped in his tracks. This time I had successfully caught his attention.

  “What did you just say?” he asked and I arched an eyebrow at him menacingly.

  “You heard me, you need to keep your hands off me if you want to stay alive,” I said and Girth’s eyebrows were crossed. He hadn’t expected me to change my tune so quickly.

  ***

  This time it was him who came rushing towards me with fury.

  “Are you threatening me?” he growled and I had to crane my neck to look up at him, while he stood menacingly in front of me, towering over me as he glared down. I jutted my chin out and held my ground. Strangely enough, even though we were fighting, there was nothing I wanted more than to be held by him.

  “All I’m saying is that you’re going to get beaten up or worse if someone from my father’s MC finds out that you’ve been fucking me,” I snapped and there was a hot sizzle in my voice. Girth gritted his teeth and I could see that he had his fists clenched on his sides as well.

  “Why would anyone find out about it unless you tell them?” he asked and I shrugged my shoulders.

  “Fred saw you staring at me and glaring at Hugh. Your jealousy was unmistakable, one look in your direction and anyone could have seen what you were feeling when Hugh and I walked out of Daddy’s office together,” I said and I didn’t know why I was torturing him this way. I guess I just wanted him to feel as miserable as I was feeling, and all because he was trying to abstain himself from me.

  Girth looked deep into my eyes and his golden brown pupils were lit on fire. He hadn’t replied to what I’d just said.

  “And it’s against club rules, as I’m sure you’ve guessed already. Nobody touches Lewis’ daughter, unless he approves of it himself,” I said and Girth gulped angrily, before he turned away from me again. The moment he did, I felt a sinking sensation in my heart.

  “And he approves of Hugh, so that shouldn’t be a problem for you two,” he said and he was now walking towards the front door. I followed him.

  “So, that’s it? You’re just going to pussy out of this because my dad doesn’t approve?” I screeched and I could hear the tear in my voice. I wanted him to fight for me, not just fuck me, but it seemed like Girth was too loyal to the MC he was a part of, it always came first. Damn every woman who came in the way, including me!

  Girth whipped around to me and he was glaring at me again, piercing my soul with his eyes.

  “I am going to do everything I can to stay the fuck away from you, Lila, because you make me weak and I don’t like being weak. I know what you’re doing, you’re trying to rile me up so that I make a mistake but that will not happen again. I’m going to stand out on your porch and do my job, because that is what has been assigned to me but nothing more is going to happen between us,” Girth’s shoulders were heaving by the time he completed his speech.

  My mouth was hanging open in surprise. I felt like someone had just slapped me across the face.

  “And if necessary, I’ll speak to Lewis myself, he can do what he wants to me because I know I fucked up. I should have been able to resist you, because you are out of my league and out of my reach. But I didn’t, and I deserve any consequences for my actions that Lewis feels fit for me,” he continued and my throat felt dry again. I could feel the tears brimming in my eyes.

  “I’m not going to tell him, Girth. I was just saying things to get a reaction from you. I don’t want you to get hurt,” I said and a cry escaped my lips as I stared at him. There was a tremble on my lips and I was afraid that I was going to break into tears in front of him, which was something that I definitely didn’t want to do.

  Girth drew in a deep breath and shook his head. He was calm again. Whatever wave of rage had washed over him during our argument had passed now.

  “I don’t care who you tell, Lila. I don’t live a life of hiding. Now, I’m going to go outside and sit on your porch. You should try and get some sleep,” he said and I watched as he reached for the doorknob and pulled the door open.

  I still couldn’t say anything as I watched him step through the door and pull it shut behind him.

  There were hot tears rolling down my cheeks now that I was alone in my house again, and the funny thing was that I didn’t even know why. Was I really crying over a man who I’d met a minute ago? What was there to even cry about? It wasn’t like I was already in love with him!

  Was it the rejection? Was it the fact that I still hadn’t psychologically recovered from the shooting?

  I walked up to the door and placed a palm on it, as though I could sense Girth outside. I looked through the peephole and saw him
standing on my porch, with his back turned to my door, staring out and surveying the area around my house.

  There was nothing but one chair on the porch where he was going to sit. I felt guilty and sad, when he could have so easily been inside the house with me.

  But even though I didn’t really know Girth, there was one thing that I had already figured out about him, it was that he was duty-bound and the kind of man who would die in order to just get the job done.

  I stepped away from the door and dragged my feet to my bedroom, where I sank into bed. I was feeling emotionally and physically exhausted now, but the one thing that had changed was that I would be able to sleep peacefully; knowing that Girth was outside my door, guarding me.

  Chapter 12

  Girth

  I hadn’t slept all night. Not just because I couldn’t get Lila out of my mind but also because I had to stay awake to keep a watch on her property. I’d stood for hours at her door, then sat down and then stood up again. By the time day broke; I could feel a stinging sensation at the back of my eyes. My body was craving sleep and my brain felt like it was shutting down. Lewis was right the other day when he said that I needed a break. I definitely needed a break right now, from Lila and from guarding her.

  I waited till it was nine, forcing myself to stay away from her door and then on the hour, I knocked. Lila was quick to open the door, almost like she’d been waiting on the other side for me to come to her.

  She was freshly showered and dressed in a thin cotton yellow dress, and had her beautiful blond hair tied in a loose ponytail that fell over her slender shoulder.

  “Do you want to come in for breakfast?” she asked, in a small voice. Seeing her again, even though it had only been one night of us being apart; hit me like a punch on the face. I wasn’t prepared for the effect she was going to have on me. I had never imagined that any woman would be capable of it.

  “No, I’m not hungry,” I said and I could feel a rumble in my belly.

  “Coffee?” she asked and I could see the eagerness in her gaze. She was begging me to say yes, but I wasn’t going to fall for it this time, not again.

  “We need to go. I’m going to drop you to the auto shop and then I’m going to take a break for a few hours. You’ll be safe there with your dad and the other men,” I told her and I stood my ground on the porch. I wasn’t going to go into her house again, unless it was absolutely necessary.

  Lila gulped and stared at me. She looked like she could have been crying and I wanted to hold her, but it was against the rules. My job was to keep her safe, not to provide her with emotional support.

  “You can rest here? I’ll make up the couch for you and you can get some sleep,” she suggested, in a small quiet voice and I shook my head.

  “I’m taking you to the auto shop. Let’s go,” I commanded and turned away from her, walking down the porch to my parked bike.

  I had to wait a couple of minutes before she finally emerged from the house. I was expecting her to put up more of a fight but she didn’t. She climbed up on my bike behind me, throwing her legs on either side before she placed her small delicate hands on my shoulders.

  I gulped down every desperate surge of desire I had for her when she touched me and I rode to the auto shop. I would be lying if I claimed that having her sitting behind me, with our bodies just inches apart, her hands on my shoulders…wasn’t distracting, but I said nothing and neither did I do anything. This was a job and I was going to have to start treating it as one before things got out of hand.

  We arrived at the auto shop, where Lewis and the others greeted us. They were clearly happy to see Lila back at the shop again, and Lewis took me aside to thank me for bringing her there. I tried to keep my guilt under the surface.

  The man was thanking me for a job well done, while the whole time I was hiding the secret that his daughter’s hand had been on my cock, milking it, just the night before.

  “I think I’m going to take that break you offered earlier,” I told Lewis and he grinned at me and nodded his head.

  “Of course, you deserve it, brother. You can have the room upstairs at the bar, it’s prepared for you,” Lewis said and thumped my back. I gulped again when I heard him call me brother. I had betrayed him and he didn’t even know it.

  Without looking at Lila again, I jumped back on my bike and rode to T-Bone.

  Like Lewis had promised, the room upstairs was ready for me. It was a simple affair, with nothing more than a single bed and a nightstand and I sank into it without taking off my boots or any of my clothes.

  When my head hit the pillow, I could feel myself drifting into sleep quickly. I wasn’t dreaming, it was more a jumbled stream of thoughts and I was conscious for most of it.

  I was thinking about my mother, and what her addiction to drugs had done to our lives. How my father was never around and I didn’t even remember what he looked like anymore.

  I had managed to get my brother out of that house fast enough, when I could afford it and I was grateful that at least he had the chance now to complete high school. What kind of a family did I belong to? Not the kind that Lila had. She had a good father, a community of men and friends to look after her. Being with me would only cause her trouble. My life would be nothing more than a bad influence on hers and she definitely deserved better than that.

  I was sleeping lightly, waking up every few minutes because I was fantasizing about Lila one minute and then thinking about how being with me would destroy her life; the next. It wasn’t a peaceful sleep, even though my body was craving it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do my job well if I didn’t get any rest but Lila had taken away my peace of mind now. It was like I’d forgotten how to fall asleep.

  ***

  I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing and I answered it groggily. I didn’t recognize the number, but it was Abe on the line, sounding anxious.

  “Where’s Lila?” I barked, jumping out of the bed and rushing to the door of the room. I heard a gunshot in the background and I could feel the adrenaline pumping in my veins.

  “She’s fine, you need to get here and take her away, like now!” Abe was shouting, over the voices of the other guys around him. I could hear the commotion and raised voices and another gunshot.

  “Fuck!” I growled and ended the call, before running out of the room and out of the bar.

  I rode my bike hard to the auto shop. What the fuck was going on? I shouldn’t have left her there by herself. It was my duty to look after her, even if it meant going without sleep or rest for days. I shouldn’t have just left her in the care of other people.

  I was cursing under my breath the whole time to the auto shop and I jumped off my bike without parking and ran towards the gate, which was now surrounded by armed men from the Marked Skulls.

  “Where’s Lila?” I barked at them but I didn’t stop running or hear their response. I could hear my own harsh breathing, my heart was racing in my chest. What was I going to do if something happened to her?

  “Girth!” I saw Abe who was standing at the doors of the garage with a gun in his hand.

  “What the fuck happened? Where is she?” I asked, panting. I was running in and Abe followed me.

  “She’s fine, she’s there,” I heard him say, but I’d seen her already.

  She was crouched down on the ground, in front of a car that had a tyre missing. She was in one piece. Other than her hair coming undone, she looked unharmed. In front of her was Lewis’ stretched body, and his ankle was in Lila’s hand.

  “What happened?” I thundered as I approached them, and Lila looked up at me. Some of the other guys were standing around her.

  Her blue eyes were wide with fear and my first instinct was to pull her into my arms and kiss her, but I forced myself to not to do it.

  “It was the Dark Legion, they landed up here and opened fire,” Fred replied.

  Lewis was on his back, stretched out in front of his daughter and I could see that Lila was in the process of bandaging
his foot. She looked afraid, too scared to speak and I wanted to hold her in my arms and stroke her hair and reassure her that I would take care of her.

  “They got Daddy!” she blubbered, but Lewis was lifting himself up on his elbows off the ground.

  “Just my leg. They got me on my leg, it’s just a scrape, I don’t have a bullet lodged me in or anything,” Lewis said, and he seemed to be in good spirits.

  “And we got rid of the bastards,” Abe was walking up to us.

  “How many of them were there?” I asked and Rodeo shrugged his shoulders.

  “Thirteen, fifteen…we didn’t count. More than us anyway,” he said and I clenched my jaws and looked at Lila again. We were surrounded by her friends, her protectors and her father, I knew I couldn’t do or say anything to arouse any suspicion that there was something else going on between us.

  “Are you okay?” was all I said. I had to say something. I was worried for her, especially since she looked deathly pale with fear. She nodded her head and held my gaze. She had a look of relief in her eyes now, like she was happy to see me and I wanted her to know that I regretted leaving her alone like this. She was my responsibility and I knew she trusted me.

  The others were helping Lewis off the ground now and Lila joined in. She’d bandaged his left calf and I could see some blood seeping out from under it.

  “Daddy, you need to go to the hospital. I’m not trained in first aid, I don’t know what I’m doing here,” she said to her father, who was now being carried over to one of the parked cars.

  “I’m fine, mouse, I’m just a little bruised that’s all. I don’t need a hospital for a thing like this,” Lewis said with a laugh, but we could all see that he was in pain but was trying to hide it.

  “Where are you taking him?” Lila was following them and I followed her, I was too anxious to let her leave my sight even for a moment.

  “They’re taking me home, mouse, you don’t need to worry,” Lewis called out to her, as Abe held the car door open for him to be helped in.