Returning Home

by Toni Shiloh

  Evan sighed and continued to Mike’s office. Her life was in God’s hands.

  He recalled Michelle’s words and the sadness abated. Jo’s going to church! He wanted to jump and shout, but knew he’d probably land on where the ‘sun don’t shine,’ as his mother would say.

  Lord, please let the sermon touch Jo’s heart so that she can lay her burdens at Your feet. Thank You so much for allowing my words to help her see You more fully. Please give me the wisdom necessary to continue to share about Your goodness. Lord, I especially thank You for getting my attention and reminding me of Your everlasting goodness. I love You.

  He cleared his throat, thankful no one was around to hear his thoughts. That was one of the things he loved most about his relationship with God. To be able to unburden himself of all his thoughts, good or bad, and know that not only was he heard, but he was still loved.

  God was good.

  Chapter Twenty

  The next day, Jo drove to her Nana’s house. Despite already committing to attend church, she still wanted to talk it over with her grandmother. If her logic was faulty, Nana would be able to tell it to her straight. Or affirm her decision. Her thoughts evaporated at the sight of a black SUV with Virginia plates parked in the driveway.

  Whose car is that?

  She pulled in beside it, eyeing it warily. Freedom Lake had its share of visitors, but no one visited her grandmother besides her. Nerves ran up and down her arms as she waited for her grandmother to answer the door. It creaked open. Her forehead scrunched, and immediately she relaxed her face to smooth away the lines as her mother’s voice echoed in her head. “Don’t frown so much, Jo Ellen, you’ll wrinkle prematurely.”

  Jo pushed the thought away. Right now she was more concerned that her grandmother forgot to lock the door. No town was safe enough to leave the doors unlocked, including Freedom Lake. She stepped into the foyer intending to call out for her grandmother, but froze at the sound of giggling.

  “Nana?” she called out, cautiously.

  “In the kitchen, Jo.”

  The sight of her grandmother, Guy and two little twin girls greeted her. Wait, Guy’s back in town?

  “Hello,” she said guardedly. She couldn’t help but remember all the times his laughter had spurred Evan’s snide comments.

  “Hey sweetie. You remember Guy, don’t you? And these are his daughters, Rachel and Rebekah.”

  “Hello!” the little girls replied in angelic voices.

  “Nice to meet you,” she said to the girls. “Guy,” she responded curtly.

  “Hi, Jo.” He rubbed the back of his neck, looking sheepish. “Hey, I’m sorry about the way I treated you in high school.”

  She stared at him, surprised. That was a fast apology. Was it sincere? “Technically, you didn’t do anything but laugh and be his amen choir.”

  “And sometimes that’s worse than words.”

  He walked forward and held out his hand. “Bygones?”

  “All right, then.” She shook his hand as she tried to decide if she was more shocked he’d come right out and apologized or that she had accepted it.

  What was wrong with her? Since when did she make nice? Since you started thinking about God, apparently. She shook herself out of her reverie. “Are you visiting or back to stay?”

  “Back. I’m the new sheriff.” He gave her a grin that hinted at its lack of use. “Your grandmother has agreed to watch the girls for me while I work.”

  She looked at her grandmother in astonishment. “Really?”

  Nana nodded.

  Jo turned back to Guy. For the first time, she noted the dark circles under his eyes. He looked thin as well. Who would watch after him? “The girls will be in good hands.”

  “So I’ve heard. Come on girls, let’s go and let Ms. Baker visit with Miss Jo.”

  “I wike your name,” said one of the little girls.

  How in the world did Guy tell them apart?

  “And I like your overalls.” The other one said. “I want some, but Daddy said I have to dress lady-like.” She turned toward her dad. “She’s a lady.”

  Jo hid a smile. Gotta love the guile of a child.

  “Yeah, yeah. We’ll talk in the car.”

  Once Guy and his daughters left, Jo settled down in her grandmother’s living room to share with her the conversation she’d had with Evan. She knew Nana would be able to offer wisdom. Though she was willing to go to church with Chloe, she wasn’t sure how she felt about running into her mother or Vanessa. She wasn’t overly concerned about Darius. Her brother kept to himself. However, Freedom Lake could feel awfully small when all the townspeople wound up in the same church.

  “I can understand your concern, Jo. Just remember the reason you’re going to church is to learn more about the Lord, not visit with people.”

  “Sure, I get that mentally, but isn’t interacting with the people another reason to go to church?”

  “Of course, part of the beauty of church is to be gathered with those who share the same beliefs, but you have to remember we’re still people...aka flawed.” Her grandmother laughed.

  “Wait, how can you be flawed and a Christian?” That didn’t make any sense. She thought becoming a Christian was supposed to cleanse you. Perfect you.

  “Honey, being a Christian doesn’t make you a perfect person. It makes you a redeemed one. You following me, honey?”

  “Not really,” she said with a shake of her head. She sighed and pulled her ponytail holder out of her head, rubbing her scalp. “Are you saying people still mess up even if they’re a Christian?”

  “Yes, dear heart, because you’re human. We won’t be perfected until we’re praising our Lord in the kingdom of heaven. But the beauty of His gift is that we no longer have to pay the price for our mistakes – past, present, or future. We’re redeemed, baby girl, redeemed.”

  Jo brought her legs up, wrapping her arms around her knees. Redeemed. What would it be like to live life knowing she’d always be accepted regardless of any mistakes she made? The thought was mind blowing in its simplicity and complexity.

  “You go on to church, JoJo, and experience the Lord for yourself. Not for who’s in there, but for you. Go there searching for answers and He will answer them. Believe me.”

  She got up and hugged her grandmother, noting her thinning body. She hated to see her Nana age but knew it was the reason she was a fountain of wisdom. “Thank you, Nana. I love you.”

  “I love you, too, baby girl.”

  Even though her Nana soothed her fears, Jo couldn’t help but think church would turn out to be another place where she’d have to avoid her mother.

  HE WAS GOING TO GET his new leg. Eager to try the prosthetic, Evan rushed behind Julie as she headed down the hall to her office. He tried to breathe slowly, but his stomach twisted like a corkscrew rollercoaster. He was beyond nervous and had to keep reminding himself to breathe.

  “Have a seat, Evan.”

  He lowered himself into the chair, holding the crutch straight up. At Julie’s request, he had left the wheelchair at home. Hopefully, he would walk out of the rehabilitation building unaided. Senior had been brimming with excitement, but Evan needed to do this part alone. So, he asked his father to wait in the waiting room. For some reason, Evan didn’t want his dad to see him if it didn’t fit properly.

  “I’m going to fit your prosthetic to your leg to make sure all is well. After that, I’ll show you how to take it off and put it on, and then you’ll do it. I also have a pamphlet to answer any questions you have about care and maintenance of the prosthetic and your leg as well.”

  “Okay,” he said quietly. His nerves wouldn’t let him speak in a normal tone.

  “Are you ready?” She met his gaze, blue eyes shining bright. It was obvious she loved her job, but right now he wished they weren’t so piercing. He gave a nod.

  She took the leg out of the box, removing the plastic bag.

  He gulped. It was go time. He was about to walk unaided. At
least he hoped he would.

  She put the lining onto his stump and then slid the socket on. He watched, surprised at the fit. It reminded him of putting on his shoe, only higher up.

  After a few moments, Julie spoke. “That should do it. Stand up, and let’s see how it fits.”

  He sent a quick prayer upward and inhaled. He slowly exhaled as he stood and settled his weight upon his foot and prosthetic. He swallowed repeatedly, trying to choke down his emotions.

  It fit.

  “It looks great, Evan.” She slid backward on the wheeled stool. “Walk to me so we can make sure.”

  He took a step forward with his right leg and then with the prosthetic. He continued walking as his brain took over, remembering the command and delighting in the response that the left leg was finally moving. Finally, he had something to receive the commands that his brain had been hardwired for since he was a toddler.

  He could walk again.

  “Fantastic, Evan!” Julie grinned at him and he grinned back. “All right, let me show you how to take it off and on.”

  The lesson went swiftly. He had watched many YouTube videos in preparation for this day. He was full of knowledge, thanks to some fellow amputees who were not ashamed but empowered and ready to help those who needed direction. Social media really could be used to benefit others.

  He walked down the hall, looking down. Once, the sight of the fake foot and steel attached to it would have made him scoff. But all he could see was independence. Never would he take for granted the ability to walk down the hallway. To stand tall. Or do all the things two legs made possible.

  The waiting room came into view. His father sat, staring at the clock. Senior must have been anxiously awaiting the passage of time. Evan wanted to call out to him but didn’t want to startle him. He stared at him, willing his dad to sense his presence.

  It must have worked because his father’s head turned toward him. Evan tensed, waiting for a reaction. His father’s eyes became glassy as he stood on shaky knees. Evan blinked rapidly. He hadn’t seen his dad cry in years.

  His father walked toward him, a slight tremor in his hands. The magazine he had been holding fell from his grasp, his gaze riveted to the prosthetic. The last few steps were carried out in a hurry and Evan found himself wrapped in a bear hug. His father swayed back and forth and for a moment Evan was transported in time to when he had broken his arm and his father had wrapped him up in his arms and told him it was okay to cry. For the tears brought by pain cleansed the soul and made way to heal the hurt.

  “It’s okay,” he rasped.

  “I know, Son, I know. Thank the good Lord.”

  “Since the first step.”

  “I’m proud of you, boy.” His dad chuckled and released him.

  He dipped his head in acknowledgement. “Let’s go show, Mom.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  November. The month of thanksgiving. For once, Jo had a lot to be thankful for. Today was day one of Evan’s renovation. She couldn’t wait. There was nothing like taking a sledgehammer to the old and breaking in the new. She lived for it. Which was why she was up and ready at seven this morning.

  Normally this time of day would come and go without so much as a blink. She’d be living in la la land, letting her dreams carry her wherever they chose. But when she had a renovation project such as this one, she was like a blackbird in search of the worm. Even though she had moved into her new place over the weekend, exhaustion stayed away. The thought of beginning a new project lured her out from under her down comforter.

  She peered out of her blinds, grinning when she saw the sunshine. It might be cold, but a few hours of tearing out old cabinets and she’d be warm in no time. Evan and his parents were going to meet her at his place. They were eager to help. Plus, they wanted to take “before” photos.

  Jo donned a gray, long-sleeve Henley and overalls. Sometimes she felt like a cartoon character, always wearing the same type of outfit, but it suited her line of work. She pulled her hair into its standard ponytail and grinned in the mirror. It was time to knock out some walls.

  The drive to Evan’s house took forever. She always thought how funny it was that a ride to someplace exciting seemed to be long and excruciating, but the drive back went by faster than the speed of sound. The first day of a reno always amped her up, definitely better than taking a vacation.

  Turning down Evan’s street, Jo smiled as excitement drummed through her. Doing a wiggle in her seat to the beat of the music, she cruised into the driveway. She had her iPhone, with her reno playlist all set to go at the touch of a button, and her trusty tool belt. Some of the guys she hired for part-time labor would be coming later in the day, but for now it would just be her and the Carters.

  Evan had agreed that gutting the kitchen first was the best plan. It was a wonderful space but it looked like the seventies had thrown up in it. She doubted Mr. Joseph had bought any new appliances since then. The new cabinets and floors were set to come in a couple of days. She just needed the place empty to install them.

  As she strolled to the front porch, she took in the staggered sidewalk. It was on the list to fix as well. Evan wanted a level surface that ramped up and flushed to the porch. Even though he was planning for a prosthetic, he wanted to proceed cautiously. She just needed the forecast to call for no rain before she took on the project. No sense pouring concrete that wouldn’t be able to dry.

  The smile she’d readied on her face froze as Evan opened the door sans crutches. Where were they?

  “Hey Jo, come on in. We’re in the kitchen. Mom brought some breakfast over.” He motioned her in.

  She walked by, a little too close, in hopes of catching a trace of his cologne.

  “I think she made so much due to nerves. The way she’s acting, you’d think this was her first renovation.”

  “She’s just excited,” Jo said, her voice coming out a little husky. She cleared her throat. Should she ask him about the crutches? Nah, maybe not. “Are you ready for the renovations?”

  His eyes lit up with his smile. “Definitely.” He shifted, his hands nestled in the bed of his pockets.

  She bit her lip, the question hovering, begging for entry.

  “Do you want to eat before we start?” He motioned toward the kitchen, looking expectantly.

  “Where are your crutches?” She held her breath, not caring that she blurted the question without any kind of class or subtlety.

  He leaned forward and grinned.

  My heart. She couldn’t breathe.

  “So you noticed, huh?” He lifted his left pants leg and showed her a steel colored artificial limb. “I don’t need them now.” He grinned broadly and his cheekbones popped out.

  “That’s wonderful!” And so is your smile!

  She blinked. Since when was she noticing his smile? Or his cologne? Or the way his eyes turned to dark amber when he was happy?

  “I was a little worried it would be difficult since it’s been awhile since my accident and surgery. But so far so good.”

  “Wow.” Jo had never seen him happier. “How do you feel?”

  “Redeemed.”

  There was that word again. “Come again?”

  “It’s a song by Big Daddy Weave. Listen to it sometime. It describes my feelings perfectly. God is good, JoJo. God is good.”

  “Okay, I’ll check it out.”

  “Great.” She turned to make her way to the kitchen. Before she finished the first step, Evan grabbed her hand.

  “Wait a second,” he murmured.

  She froze, staring at his hand holding hers. The difference in their shades was subtle and oh-so fascinating. She watched as his thumb lazily ran back and forth on the back of her hand. She lifted her eyes as his voice penetrated the longing that strummed a chord in her heart.

  “I heard you were thinking of going to church. Is that true?” His eyebrows dipped low.

  Was he concerned? Did he care? Not just about her soul but Jo, the person? “Yes, that
’s true. Where did you hear that?” Why did her voice sound so strange? Why did her mouth feel parched?

  “Michelle.”

  She let out a laugh, humor absent from it. “She’s not too happy with me. She gave me the cold shoulder this weekend.”

  “How so?”

  “We moved in together. Temps in the house were pretty frosty.” Had been ever since the night he held her and let her cry.

  “Oh wow. Do you feel better than being at your mother’s house?”

  “I will once Michelle stops sulking. You’d think I became a nun the way she’s acting. I told her I would try one service. I look at it as investigating, for lack of a better word.”

  “Well, if you have any questions, please ask. I’d be happy to help you investigate.” He winked at her, dropped her hand and headed for the kitchen.

  She stared at her hand, noting the sameness. It hadn’t changed. Yet the feeling coursing through it staggered her. She felt like her heart had literally been touched. All because he touched me. She shook her hand, trying to jar the feeling, but her mind replayed the pattern Evan’s thumb had followed while holding her hand.

  EVAN GRABBED A CUP of coffee as Jo plopped her toolbox on the kitchen counter. Maybe if he gripped the cup hard enough, his hands wouldn’t shake. He didn’t know what made him grab her hand like that, but once he had he couldn’t let it go. His mind still recalled the softness of her skin. The smoothness of it had shocked him, yet he had still felt the calluses on her palm that came with her job. The dichotomy between the two fascinated him. Jo always represented strength and confidence. But with one touch of her hand, he’d been reminded of the one thing he’d tried to forget: Jo was a beautiful woman.

  Sure, she didn’t dress like the stereotypical female but that wasn’t an issue. When her big brown eyes locked onto his, he felt the need to prove his manhood. He wanted to sweep her off her feet, listen to her and take care of her every need. And he desperately wanted her to see him as a whole man.