Only To Me (Secrets of the Past)

by L Baker

  “You will get through this, I can promise you that.”

  I smiled at her and we begin to stand just as Lucas was coming through the door. He immediately ran to me and grabbed me in a big bear hug.

  “Finally. God-damn it, don’t pull anymore stunts like that, I was so worried Anna. You almost gave me a premature heart attack.”

  He took a whiff of my scent.

  “You shifted baby sister?” he asked amused.

  I nodded my head.

  “Well damn, you don’t see that too often, not even eighteen yet and my baby sister out did me. I’m jealous.”

  I giggled at his word but refrained from speaking.

  No one spoke after that and the room seemed awkward and tense.

  “Ok then let’s get these leaves out of your hair” My mother said, interrupting the silence while plucking a dead leaf from my waves.

  I reached up and imagined I looked like a feral wild woman.

  We went to my mother’s room, and I sat in front of her oval mirror. She grabbed the brush and begin pulling it through my long wavy hair, causing the debris from the woods to fall to the floor.

  I picked up the picture that sat on the dresser in front of me.

  I looked at an older version of Lucas. Stress lines had formed around his eyes and the Navel tat-too showed faintly on his forearm. He was smiling, squeezing my mother with a giant hug around her waist. Her hair was long like mines but had more curl to it.

  It was hanging loose, covering her chest and shoulders as she looked away from the camera at an unseen object.

  “How did you do it mom?” I asked almost whispering. “I mean, did you two love each other at all when you married him?”

  She looked at me through the mirror. She stood in the same position for a while and I didn’t think I would get an answer until she grabbed the picture, looking only at it, and begin speaking.

  She chuckled “I absolutely despised your father, I was a wild child and I had no interest in mating. In fact, I had plans to travel…… I was absolutely devastated when my father told me I was to marry him.”

  A frown crossed her face from the memory. I continued to look at her through the mirror.

  “I made it my point to make his life a living hell, but he never gave up. He promised that he would continue to love me even though I could not love him...With time I grew to appreciate your father, he was sweet and gentle, and I loved him for that.” she said rubbing the picture with her hand. I turned around to face her and she looked at me.

  “I promise you Annalise if you give Eric a chance you will grow to love him.”

  Although I was now angry I didn’t let it show, I could feel the redness of my cheeks, and I turned back to the mirror. She grabbed the brush again and continued to brush my hair.

  “I love Christian.” I stated under my breath. Her body tensed behind me and the brush hit the floor. She was frozen as if I had just slapped her in the face.

  “You have to push that from you mind Annalise,” she finally spoke “Christian is no longer apart of this pack, and you are to marry Eric. That is all. It is time to put away childish things and accept your responsibilities to our clan.” The words flew out of her mouth in one breath.

  I didn’t bother arguing with her. I stood and headed towards my room. I could feel her eyes on my back as I departed, but I couldn’t look at her, not now, I was hurt and I had no one on my side anymore.

  Christian was gone and I was alone.

  I made it to my room and stripped from the clothes that I had gotten from Eric, and threw on my favorite pair of sweat pants, and a t-shirt. I collapsed on my bed. I could feel the tears roll-ing down my face and hit my pillow until the burning of my eyes put me to sleep.

  Chapter 9: The Call

  My alarm went off as usual, and I hadn’t realized how much time had passed as it was now Fri-day. There was only a week left, but school wasn’t an option today, only Christian was on my mind. I went to my bathroom and did my normal morning routine.

  Sitting at my mirror I noticed my face was completely pale, I hated the person staring back at me and decided it was time to get up.

  Mom was sitting at the Island alone. She looked worried again but I didn’t bother to ask what was wrong. I walked to the fridge and grabbed the bottle of orange juice. I poured myself a glass and begin drinking it leaning against the sink.

  “Good morning, how did you sleep?”

  “Fine.” I muttered and continued to drink my juice. She picked up the flowers in front of her and came towards me. I slid out of her way as she ran fresh water into the vase. The phone rang and she stiffened. On the second ring she walked and picked up.

  “Hello.”

  I placed my glass in the sink, and grabbed the vase preparing to place it back on the Island. My head snapped to my mother as she angrily spoke into the line quietly.

  “Do not call my house again.” she slammed the phone down.

  “Who was that” I questioned.

  She didn’t answer. “Who was on the phone Mom?”

  “Bill collectors.”

  The phone rang again as soon as she had turned her back to it. She turned and yanked the phone off the hook.

  “She has nothing to say to you.” she snapped into the phone.

  The vase fell from my hand, shattering all over the floor as I rushed towards her and grabbed the phone.

  “Christian?” I questioned with hope.

  “Hey trouble maker, missing me that bad huh!” he joked

  “Where are you,” “What happened,” “When will I see you?”

  “Calm down Anna, I’m ok, a little bruised for now but I’ll live. I have a plan and I’m coming to get you.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Just trust me, I love you, and I’ll see you soon.”

  The line disconnected but I couldn’t remove the phone from my ear. I held on to it with dear life wanting to hear his voice again, wanting to be with him. My mother yanked it from my hand, startling me out of my trance.

  “Anna this is unacceptable.” She was holding my arms with pleading eyes. “Please just let it go, Let. Him. Go, it’s for the best.”

  “Let go of me!”

  I squirmed and walked past her and out the door. Her car was now back in the driveway and I shot passed it making my way to the street. I was determined and I would walk right out of town if I had to. If that’s what it took to find him.

  I walked and walked until I saw the exiting sign that stood on the borders of town. I picked up my pace, as I knew I would soon be out of wolf territory and closer to the city. I could hear a car approaching and assumed it was just someone heading to the city to shop. I threw my thumb out hoping to hitch a ride. The driver slowed and rolled down the window.

  Amarog stared at me with his grey eyes.

  “Your mother called, I know what you are thinking, and I’m telling you it’s a bad idea.”

  I ignored him and started walking again. He drove slowly beside me.

  “Listen to me, you’re going about this the wrong way.”

  I continued to walk. He drove ahead of me and pulled to the side before stepping out of the car. I stopped a few feet away from him.

  “What are you my keeper?” I asked angrily

  “No I’m hoping to be a friend trying to help another friend in need.”

  “You are no friend of mine.”

  “I deserve that, but I need you to trust me. Go against everything you heart and head is telling you now. Think about what you’re doing and the consequences that could follow.”

  I glared at him as he spoke, I could feel my frustration building and decided to keep walking. I hurried past him, but he followed a few feet behind me.

  “If you don’t want to do it for yourself, do it for the boy. Do it for Christian.”

  I stopped in my tracks and turned towards him suspicion and shock clean across my face.

  “You know nothing about Christian.” I spat

&nbs
p; “That may be so, but I’m sure he wants no harm to come to you, if you won’t live for yourself, at least live for his sake.” He finished.

  I stood there for a minute considering what he had just said. He made it seem as if death would be the consequence he referred to earlier. Maybe he knew something I did not.

  I pondered my options before taking a step towards him hesitantly. He extended his hand and I placed mine in his.

  “Thank you,” he said holding my hand “I assure you that you are making the right decision.”

  I looked into the grey eyes that read trust me. He released my hand and turned towards the car.

  I followed still questioning myself and the choice I had made. He opened the back door and I slid in. The drive home was silent but I could feel his eyes on me every now and then as I stared out the window, hoping I had not made a mistake.

  The next morning I hurried out of bed as I heard the phone ringing. I was desperate to reach the phone before my mother.

  “Christian?” I answered excitedly, hoping I was right.

  “No it’s just me.” Lily’s said almost disappointed.

  “Hey lil’s, I miss you.”

  “Where the hell have you been, I’ve been calling your phone? I haven’t spoken to Chris-tian……..My mother told me he wasn’t a part of the pack anymore, do you know why?”

  She was fishing for answers but I wouldn’t budge.

  “No” I muttered.

  “Oh.”

  “Well anyways, I hear you and Eric are to be mated.”

  I was now annoyed. “Apparently so.”

  “So how are the love birds doing anyways?”

  “Trust me, there is no love here. I have no interest in him whatsoever. I love Christian, Lily” My words came out bold and exhausted as I said his name.

  “What do you mean Anna, how can you not love a god like that, he’s perfect in every way, and he’s our Alpha, and you wanna disregard him for”

  I cut her off as she tried to sell me on the perfect dream.

  “Lily I have to go.”

  I slammed the receiver down without a proper goodbye and made my way back to my room. I went to the bathroom to clean myself up. In my room I sat at my mirror once again assessing the image. I pulled my hair into a thick ponytail, but decided against it when I saw the bite that lingered on my shoulder. It was now just a faded scar but remained visible as it would forever. I pulled my hair over my shoulders to hide it and stood up to get dressed.

  I met my mother and brother in the family room as they watched TV. I sat down on the floor next to the coffee table and grabbed a magazine.

  The doorbell rang as I begin scanning through the second one.

  “Grab the door” Luke said nudging me with his foot.

  I opened the door and my smile dropped as Eric stood there, two sentinels waiting by the car. He walked in without an invitation and walked passed me. I shut the door and followed him to the family room.

  “Hello Eric, how are you today” my mother asked, Luke nodded what’s up and turned back to the TV.

  I went back to my spot on the floor ignoring his presence as he sat next to Luke.

  “I’m fine, I’m here to remind you of the party this evening.”

  “What party” my mother asked

  “The Half-Moon ceremony”

  “Oh, I completely forgot. Where is my mind going” my mother said

  “It’s totally fine, I came to fetch Anna for the evening.”

  I glanced back at him. He pulled a black box from his pocket, and I immediately turned my head back into my book. My mother gasped as he opened the box. Oh Eric it’s lovely she said holding the box.

  “Anna” she called me and I turned to her “look what Eric has brought”

  I looked at the gold pendant. It was a G with feathered wings behind it and a small Latin phrase below it.

  “Lovely” I said sarcastically

  “You are to wear it tonight” he stated “it is to show the clan of our intention to marry.”

  My other clapped her hands excitedly. I rolled my eyes into my book.

  Luke and I sat there quietly while they conversed.

  “Let’s go Anna we don’t have much time’

  He was now standing. I looked to my mother, she nodded, and I got up.

  In the car the, two sentinels rode up front, and Eric and I in the back. I was in no mood for a party. I knew how important the Half-Moon ceremony was. This was when the packs united to celebrate the demise of the Rigors, who brought unnecessary attention to our kind.

  I also knew it would be no fun without him by my side as he was every year before this one.

  Forty five minutes later we pulled up to the house, flowers and lighting had been set up around the fountain and the trees that lined the driveway. Never actually looking at the house the one time I was there I failed to realize the beauty of the lawn and the house itself. The grass was perfectly trimmed with tall trees that lining the drive way. The house looked like a mini castle built from old stones. The windows were bared and security stood at different post around the yard.

  We got out of the car and Eric hiked me by my arm. Up the stairs I could smell blood, and saw that the door had the Gadreal family crest painted on it. When the doors opened the G split in half with the wings separating to each side. Inside the house people were hurrying around with trays and dinnerware, placing flowers and paintings here and there. Eric must have noticed my shock expression because the entire front of the house was much bigger than before. Apparently the walls had been knocked out forming a massive ballroom.

  “Welcome to my home.”

  “I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t forced the issue.” I sneered, but was escorted upstairs without a reply.

  “I’m not going in there” I protested as we walked towards the same room I woke in.

  He continued walking, holding my arm. The same guards were standing there and the one to the left pulled a key from his neck and unlocked the door.

  The door closed behind us.

  “As you know, you have clothes in the closet there, I would suggest wearing the red in the back. The party begins at seven, I’ll see you then.”

  “I’m not staying in here.” I objected again, “you can’t just lock me away whenever you want, this isn’t humane.”

  “For something to be considered inhumane, it must first be classified as human…and you know we don’t fall into that category, love.”

  He smirked and headed towards the door.

  “I’m serious I’m not staying in this room.”

  “Fine” he said folding his arms.

  “How about a compromise. I won’t lock the door if you agree to wait awhile before roaming, it’s busy downstairs and the workers can do without the distraction.”

  “Fine” I said “compromise”

  He smiled and walked out the door. I would have been surprised when the lock snapped right after, but I expected as much from him.

  I flopped down on the bed. I knew boredom would be my only company, so I decided a nap would suffice.

  Chapter 10: The party

  A knock on the door woke me and Sara walked in.

  “It’s almost time dear, Eric sent me to assist you.”

  I yawned groggily, I had forgotten about the party during my peaceful sleep. Sara was rummaging through the closet by the time I rolled out of bed. She surfaced holding a red dress with matching heels.

  “He suggested you wear this one tonight.”

  She handed me the dress and shoes and walked towards the bathroom. I stripped and pulled the dress over my head. It was about mid-thigh and loose because of the unzipped zipper. Sara came towards me and turned me around instantly zipping the dress up, causing it to hug my body. I slipped on the red ballet flats and ran my fingers through my hair.

  “You look lovely honey.” Sara smiled “Now let’s get you downstairs.”

  Downstairs Eric and his mother were talking and I could hear the conve
rsation was about the party.

  “Oh you are so beautiful in red.” She said too happily.

  “Yes, I chose the dress perfectly.” Christian said walking towards me and sniffing my neck. This annoyed me as much as he did and I stepped away from him.

  “Thank you,” I mumbled “when does the party begin?”

  “Our guest should be arriving soon,” Isabelle answered “have a seat dear, there’s something I would like to discuss,” she motioned for the seat across from her, as Eric walked out.

  “Eric tells me you have not accepted him as your mate.” Her voice was almost nonchalant and too polite. “I suggest you remedy this situation. I will forewarn you, I don’t accept embarrassment as an option and you my dear will not be the one to bring shame to my house. Do you understand?”

  Her words hit me razor sharp and the doorbell rang. She excused herself and I could hear the greetings of the first arrivals.

  Eric now in front of me reached for my hand to stand but I refused it and stood on my own. In-stead he grabbed my waist and pulled me to his hip.

  I pushed off.

  “I would appreciate it if you kept your hands to yourself” I spat.

  I was surprised when he grabbed me hard and forced his tongue between my lips as I pushed against his chest in defiance. When he released me I was in motion to slap him but his hand caught my arm in midair.

  “It’s bound to happen sooner or later, so I suggest you get used to my hands.”

  Isabelle walked in interrupting my response.

  “Here’s the happy couple now” Isabelle spoke with a clap. Eric let me go and whispered in my ear.

  “Behave yourself tonight.”

  I composed my posture and looked at the couple who stood with Isabelle

  “Anna these are our cousins, Sheila and Jonathon”

  Eric pulled me to them and we shook hands casually.

  “You are absolutely beautiful, let’s hope the children take after their mother.” Jonathon teased. “So how’s my cousin treating you?”