The Calling

by Destiny Hawkins

  Carmen sighed. “Well, when you feel like you can, you know where to find me.” She walked ahead of me into the classroom, but sat in her usual spot, and I sat in mine. It almost made me want to burst into laughter, because even when she was upset with me, she still stuck around. That was one of the reasons I loved her so much.

  Most of the day, I didn’t really listen to my instructors. My mind was elsewhere, trying to figure out what was going on with my light. I was starting to wonder if I needed professional help, or if these experiences that I were having was real. I mean, one day my eyes were black, and then last night they were blue. I could try to do more research into my problem, but just like before, there was probably nothing that could give me answers.

  Glowing eyes is something a Gods Child can do.

  That very thought bugged me for the entire day. I didn’t think that it was possible, but then again, everything kept leading up to that. The color of my light, the glowing of my eyes, the fact that I was strong enough to go into my Lighter Form－it all lead up to being a Gods Daughter. If I were living in the Wild Lands, the thought of being one would have excited me, but since I lived here in Lytonia, it terrified me. I couldn’t be one.

  The end of the day finally came, and Carmen and I blew off steam in the training room for a few hours. She was obviously still angry about earlier. I could tell with every throw of her energy ball, and it felt as if she were only growing angrier because she couldn’t hit me.

  I ducked, dodged, slid, and hopped so that I wouldn’t get hit by one of Carmen’s blows. I surprised myself as I continued to move out of the way with ease and hadn’t even grown tired yet. Carmen, on the other hand, was dripping with sweat and was clearly exhausted.

  “Wha－” she doubled over. “How?”

  “How what?” I asked, walking over to her.

  “You’re still,” she waved her hand. “Whatever.”

  I smiled. “You feeling better now?”

  Carmen took a deep breath and stood upright. “I was never mad.”

  We both just stared at each other before smiling.

  “You’re ridiculous,” I said.

  “And you’re on energy pills.”

  I bit my lower lip and took a slow step back. I could try energy flowing with Carmen to confirm if what I saw with Soren was real, but then again, Carmen may not even try it, and if she knew that I tried energy flowing before, she’d freak.

  Carmen’s smile turned into a frown. “Are you? You know that those are illegal and addicting.”

  “No,” I shook my head. “But…I’ll show you what I’ve been trying. I kind of need your help.”

  Carmen’s eyebrows furrowed as she pushed herself off the wall. “What did you do?”

  I clenched my teeth and sighed. “Let’s go to the roof.”

  —

  Carmen sat cross legged across from me while leaning back on her hands. “Energy flowing? Are you crazy?” she asked with a raised brow. “That could literally make you crazy.”

  “It could also solve my problems as well,” I stated. “And I’ve done it before. As you can see, I’m fine.”

  Carmen squinted her eyes, inquisitively. “You’ve done it before? With who, Rayah?”

  I took a deep breath and turned to the city. I wanted to tell her about Soren and the Wild Lands, but that was too much information for her in one night. This was too much information for her at all. “I can’t tell you.”

  I could hear Carmen taking a deep breath through her nostrils. “Have you done anything else that I need to know about?”

  I shook my head no, pressing my lips together.

  “Well,” Carmen bit her lower lip, “how does this help solve your problems?”

  I turned back to Carmen with wide eyes. She didn’t ask me a bunch of questions, and she wasn’t freaking out, but it sounded as if she were willing to help me.

  She rolled her eyes. “Don’t look at me like that. I just want to know how this helps you.”

  “Well, it helps me connect with my powers better. It should help me produce light, but I haven’t really gotten the hang of it yet,” I answered.

  Carmen sat upright and slowly took one of my hands. She didn’t offer me a smile, but I could see the hope in her eyes. “Only because it may help you, but I’m not doing this again. We could be collard for this.”

  “I know.” I hated the fact that we were out in the open. We could’ve done it in my dorm, but at risk of being caught by officers.

  I took Carmen’s other hand. “Thanks.”

  Carmen gave me a serious look. “So, how do we go about this?”

  I stared down at her hands while trying to remember how flowing actually worked. “I’m going to try and push my energy into you, and then I’m going to pull it back. You’re supposed to do the same.

  Carmen nodded but didn’t seem to fully understand how to do it, and honestly, I didn’t either. Sora and Soren started the flowing off, and I had no idea how they were creating the connection where our powers intertwined in the first place.

  “Let me try first.” I tightened my grip around her hands and closed my eyes, then tried to connect with my own energy, but behind my eyes all I saw was darkness, and all I felt was emptiness. There was only a second where I felt something, like a spark of power that could ignite into a flame, but then it was gone as soon as it came, and I was completely empty again.

  After a few minutes of silence, I started hearing Carmen’s low laughs, so I popped one eye open. Carmen was across from me while biting down on her lower lip, trying to keep from smiling.

  “What?” I asked in annoyance.

  “Your face,” Carmen giggled. “Gods Rayah, Relax.”

  I frowned and closed my eyes again. “I’m trying to concentrate.”

  Carmen continued to laugh. “I know, but do you have to look so constipated?”

  I tried to continue focusing, but Carmen’s constant laughter was too much of a distraction. “Carmen!” I snapped.

  Carmen let my hands go and continued to laugh. She fell over to her side still laughing at absolutely nothing, but then what she did next threw me completely off guard.

  She began to cry.

  “Carmen?” I drew my eyebrows together in confusion.

  “I miss Tristan.” She sniffled. “Why did he have to die?”

  “Carmen, what’s－”

  “Don’t ask me what’s wrong!” When she waved her hand at me a dark blue flame shot out of her palm and at my head, but I ducked and shielded myself in the fetal position so not to be burned. The large flame continued to blow for a few seconds until it died down. Carmen was already strong, but at the moment, stronger. “I already told you! Tristan’s gone!”

  Happiness, sadness, and then anger. Carmen was experiencing heightened emotions, which meant that I transferred some of my energy over to her, but how much? I barely felt or saw anything.

  Oh gods.

  I slowly got back to my feet, then convinced Carmen to let me take her back to her dorm. Once she was safely tucked into bed, I quickly walked back to my own dorm. I didn’t know what to do or what to think, and after a few hours of staying up I came to the conclusion that sleeping was my best move for now. Until I had answers, there was no way that I could use my energy.

  Chapter 6

  “Curiosity can lead to great things...sometimes.” — Sandra

  “Rayah,” A voice echoed in my mind. The sound of this voice soothed me into relaxation, and my first thought was that it was Tristan’s voice, but when I opened my eyes, I was looking into Soren’s.

  We were standing on the roof of Monroe Academy, and although I knew Soren shouldn’t have been here, something felt off. When I turned my head to face the city, I noticed that it was further than usual, giving little to no light. All we had were the stars and the moons, and for some reason that, of all things, felt right. What didn’t feel right was the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.

  “Rayah, I want you to come back,” Sore
n said softly.

  I opened my mouth to speak, but then closed it and drew my eyebrows together in confusion. “Am I dreaming?”

  Soren smiled. “Something like that.”

  When I took a step towards Soren, I noticed the yellow smoke escaping from under my foot, floating into the air around me. Within it, I noticed sparks of blue and green before it faded into the night.

  “What…” I slowly lifted my head to look back at Soren but met Tristan’s dark brown eyes only inches away from mine. His hair was short and wild on his head, as I remembered, and he was smiling. I had almost forgotten what it was like. “T—Tris…tan?” I knew that I was dreaming but was still excited to see him. My best friend, and the boy that I could’ve fallen in love with given more time and freedom. “I miss you.”

  “I know.” He used his knuckle to raise my chin. “And you’ll be with me soon.”

  I frowned, confused. “Wh—what? But you’re…”

  Tristan smiled, but there was something dark behind his smile that frightened me. “Because of what you are. You’re a monster, Rayah, and in Lytonia they kill monsters.”

  My lips parted before all the oxygen left my lungs. What did he mean, and why did he seem so happy about this? This wasn’t the Tristan that I remembered. My dream was quickly turning into a nightmare.

  Tristan slowly leaned in closer for a kiss, and I wanted to move, but was frozen in place. “Once you’re dead, we can be together forever.”

  I took in a breath and shook my head. “You aren’t real.”

  Tristan gave a low laugh. “I am in your mind. I’m always inside of you, hearing your every thought and feeling your every emotion. All of that screams at me when you’re around Soren.”

  I blinked a few times, then gained the strength to step away from him. “What are you talking about?”

  Tristan cocked his head to the side. “I’m talking about your feelings for him. They’re so…conflicting. So strong.” He chuckled. “You’re falling for him.”

  I squinted my eyes and slowly shook my head. “He’s just my friend.”

  Tristan began to laugh, and as he laughed, he began to change. His body formed into my bringer of nightmares. Into Artemis. “I hope that’s true, Rayah.” A knife formed in his hand. “Because like I said before, no man can have you but me. I can get rid of him as well.”

  I clenched my teeth and took another step back, just noticing the red waves of smoke rising from under my feet until it floated above my head. The smoke was becoming so thick that I could barely see through it to Artemis. “You…you won’t hurt him.”

  Artemis’ chuckle echoed throughout the darkness. “And what will you do about it? You can’t fight me. You can’t use your light.”

  I frowned and balled my fists. “I’ll learn.”

  At this point, the only thing I could see through the red smoke was Artemis’ bright smile.

  “And when I do, I’ll finally be free of you,” my voice echoed. I didn’t know where it came from, but my inner strength was forcing its way to the surface. It didn’t stay long though. When a hand cut through the smoke and locked around my throat, I froze.

  “You will never be free from me, Rayah,” Artemis growled. “Never.”

  —

  “I will…” I rasped.

  “Rayah,” Soren whispered. I felt his soft hand resting over my shoulder, and then a slight shove. “Rayah, wake up.”

  For a moment, I was afraid to open my eyes in fear that I would only be facing another dream, but when I heard Soren call my name again, I couldn’t help but to open them. My chest grew warm, and most of my tension went away, which was an effect that he had on me that I still couldn’t understand, and at the moment, I really didn’t care to.

  When I looked up at him, I noticed the tall dark trees behind his head, and the golden orbs surrounding us. “Soren.”

  Soren offered a worried smile. “I would’ve waited until you woke up on your own, but you were having a nightmare.” His finger caught a single tear that was slowly sliding down my cheek.

  “Thank you,” I said before sitting up and quickly wiping away any other tears that may have fallen. It was embarrassing for people to see me cry, because I wasn’t one to cry often. It made me look even weaker than I already was, and I had to continue to look strong in front of others, even if I wasn’t.

  Soren was sitting next to me but faced in my direction while leaning back on his palms. “Were you dreaming about him?”

  At first, I thought that he was referring to Tristan, but by the grim look on his face I figured that he was speaking of Artemis.

  I nodded and directed my eyes towards my lap.

  Soren sighed and dropped his head back to look up at an orb that was floating a few feet over his head. “I wish that I could get you out of there. I want to take you far away from Lytonia.”

  The corner of my lip slightly curved upwards. “And bring me here?”

  Soren lowered his head and turned his to face me. “Would you want to come back to my village? I mean, if you were to escape Lytonia, you’d be free to do as you please.”

  I thought of the children, the beauty, and of my horse, but the person that really came to mind when I thought of freedom was Soren. He was my friend, and one that I strongly became attached to. I didn’t really understand how I felt about him, but I did know that I’d follow him anywhere. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

  Soren grinned and looked away from me again. I saw his chest rise and fall in my peripheral, and then he lay down on his back. “Lay with me.”

  I stared down at him and admired his beauty before laying back and staring up at the roaming orbs. We were quiet for a long time until Soren finally spoke.

  “Why did you leave so suddenly last night?”

  I hesitated to speak, because I didn’t want him to judge me, but something told me that he wouldn’t. Away from him, I convinced myself that he’d be as disgusted with me as I was, but at this moment, right next to him, I didn’t feel that way. It may have all just been in my mind, but I felt as if I could tell him anything.

  “I think I got scared,” I answered.

  Soren shifted. “Of what?”

  I squinted my eyes, thinking back to the last time that I was here. “Myself. I think－what I saw when we were energy flowing－it frightened me.”

  “But, what you saw was beautiful.”

  I tilted my head towards him. My head was resting by his waist, but I could still see his face when I looked downwards. “What I saw was different. I can’t afford to be different.”

  Soren frowned. “I know. I’ve actually been wondering for a while, but if you’re supposedly a Null, why aren’t you…”

  “Artemis’ slave yet?” I sighed. “My parents made a deal with the council that if I could reach level six by the age of twenty, then I wouldn’t be collard.” I paused while thinking of my mother. “My mother took my place until then, but if I pass, and even if I fail, she’ll be freed.”

  Soren was quiet, making me wonder what he was thinking.

  “I want to pass leveling so that my mother didn’t sacrifice her freedom for nothing. I would never forgive myself if I didn’t, but now, if my light isn’t a standard color, then it would have all been for nothing, and they would － they would kill me. I thought that I hated myself as a Null, but now, having light energy is starting to feel like a bad thing. Like it’s worse, because it may not be－” When I heard my voice begin to shake, I stopped talking, not wanting Soren to see me cry again.

  “Rayah.” Soren slowly sat up. “I want you to understand something.” When he smiled at me, I wanted to fall apart, but kept my tears behind my eyes. The stress of this entire situation was building up and breaking me down. “Everything will be okay.”

  I stared into his glowing eyes with wonder, and a part of me actually believed him. I gave a weary smile. “You can’t be sure of that Soren.”

  Soren rested his warm hand over mine and caressed the back of
it with his thumb. Butterflies formed in the pit of my belly, but then the heat rising within me scared them away. “I’m sure. We’ll figure something out. Emerald might be able to give us more answers.”

  I sat back up. “But, what if the answers are the ones I don’t want to hear? What if I really am different? You saw the colors of my light, right? One was blue, and the other－”

  Soren put his finger to my lips. “We’ll figure something out.” He stood up and then helped me to my feet. “Let’s go.”

  I drew my eyebrows together. “Go where?”

  Soren grinned. “To see my grandmother.”

  “Now?”

  “Yes now, or do you want to wait until you’re twenty to find out?”

  I licked my lower lip and sighed.

  “I thought you’d like that idea.”

  Soren and I weren’t far from the village, so it didn’t take long to make it back. It must’ve been late though, because most of the villagers were in their tents sleeping, and the elders were sitting around the village fire talking to one another.

  I was searching for Sora with my eyes but stopped when we finally came to Emerald’s tent.

  “Going to try energy flowing again, Rayah?” I heard a little girl ask.

  I turned to my left to see one of the village children, Joci, rubbing her eyes. She had low cut brown hair, light brown freckles, and dark brown eyes just like her mother. I had only met her mother a few times, but when I saw them together, I noticed that they looked just alike. The two of them had a relationship that I wished me and my own mother had. “Not exactly. I guess I haven’t figured it out yet.”

  Joci yawned. “Well, you will. Just keep practicing. Soren says that practice makes perfect.”

  I smiled. “Okay, then I’ll keep practicing.”

  “I’ll make sure that she does.” Soren chuckled. “Now get to sleep Joci. You have a long and full day ahead of you. Make sure that you thank the gods for your freedom when you wake up.”

  Joci yawned again. “I will.” She tiredly walked towards her tent in the opposite direction of us.