by Jen Wylie
He laughed, and the bitterness in it shocked her more than his amusement. "They did not punish me for killing you. It was because I got caught."
She could only stare at him.
He shook his head. "I became a liability, and those are always quickly disposed of. If not for the prince, quite likely I'd have been killed."
"I see." She worked on rinsing blood from his hair. "Who did this to you?"
Angry eyes met hers. "The queen. She is not one to cross, Arowyn. The prince made the right decision in not bringing you home with him. You'd not be alive now if he had."
His words sent a chill down her spine and worry gripped her stomach. Prince could take care of himself. She needed to remember that.
Baelan once told her he'd killed her because she was hurting Prince, she knew that much. But his words made her think further. "Were you to kill me?"
"Your death had not yet been ordered."
The tone of his voice drew her attention and she went over his words again. "You believe it would have been though?"
"Yes. I have no doubt. I was not her only assassin, but I was the best," he continued. "You being…human, others would have been sent before me. Had they failed, I would have been sent eventually." His voice softened as her eyes grew wide. "I am here for a reason. Prince Shael sent me to protect you."
"From his mother," she whispered, still shocked.
"Those she would send. Will send, yes. Vesrin and the others acted on their own. It is quite likely others will as well, trying to gain favor or to hurt him, though I imagine they'll now be more…discreet in breaking our laws. But should the prince continue to behave as he has, others will come."
"Surely he knows this?"
Baelan snorted. "Of course he does. So, they bait him. They push and push, and he cares for you too much not to react. You are his weakness," he said softly.
Yes, she'd heard that before, and didn't want to get into that argument again. "I see." Clearing her throat, she brought the topic back to her question he'd tried to evade. "So, who are you then?"
"I am who I need to be."
He looked away again and she paused in her cleaning.
What a strange thing to say.
∞ ∞ ∞
Baelan brought her bread and burnt fried eggs for breakfast. Still in bed, she eyed the eggs warily, trying not to wrinkle her nose. "Not much of a cook?"
"I have trouble with eggs." A faint, unsure smile curved his lips and disappeared.
With a snort, she took the tray, shaking her head. Had he just attempted a joke? Hopefully, he didn't think their talk last night suddenly made them friends. Yet, something between them had changed. She didn't quite hate him as much as before. Pausing a moment, she forced a smile. "Thank you."
"Bo's gone off to the tavern already."
Her eyebrows rose. Was it later than she thought? She hadn't slept well. Just dozed on and off between spinning thoughts and a few nightmares she thankfully couldn't remember.
Picking at the food, she tried not to look at Kei too often. He remained a motionless body beside her, breathing, but nothing else.
Baelan cleared his throat, yet when she looked at him his eyes rested on the Fey. "He doesn't have much longer," the Elf informed her gently.
Her gaze darted back to Kei. Being with him all the time, she didn't notice the changes. His breaths came soft and shallow, his golden skin had a sickly pallor to it. He'd lost so much weight his cheekbones stood out sharply against the hollows of his cheeks.
He wouldn't die. He couldn't. They had to save the Fey. She couldn't do it without him. Besides, he'd promised he'd never leave her. Her throat closed up, her appetite disappearing.
Holding her barely touched food out, she took a deep breath after he quickly took it from her hands. "I want you to teach me how to go into someone's mind."
Baelan dropped the tray.
∞ ∞ ∞
He didn't speak as he cleaned up the mess on the floor and she left the flustered Elf to his thoughts until he stood, tray in hand, and gave her a helpless look.
"I need to go in and help him." She looked over at Kei. "I've run out of time. I can't wait for him to wake up on his own. I don't think he's going to," she admitted softly.
The Elf heaved out a sigh. Turning, he walked over to set the tray on her dresser. "You're human, Arowyn. This is something I can't teach you."
She could have told him then, of the fortress she built in her mind, of how she even created a Were pack with her boys, but she didn't. She had no idea how much he already knew, but didn't trust him enough to give him more if he didn't already know. "I want to try."
He shook his head, but then nodded, not able to deny her need.
Did he hate her for that? She didn't ask. She didn't care.
"Now?"
"Yes."
A resigned sigh left his lips, but he came around the side of the bed. "You understand I must go into your mind?"
Her stomach churned and she swallowed back bile at the thought. She didn't want him there, not ever.
She had no choice. She would do anything for Kei. "I do."
He knelt beside the bed. "Lie down. Close your eyes."
A breath shuddered out of her as she did as he asked. Fingers slipped tentatively into hers. Though she knew he needed to touch her, she couldn't stop the flinch. "Give me a moment, and then come in."
Diving into her mind, she opened her eyes and looked around. Was there anything she didn't want him to see? Her gaze settled on the small tree growing alone in the barren dirt. Striding over to it, she couldn't help the small smile that came to her lips. She still didn't know what it represented, but certainly it signified something good. The little tree had grown, almost reaching to her chin now. Stroking the leaves gently, she then stepped back and spread her hands.
"Hide," she whispered.
A misty fog rose around her. Walking backward, she watched until the tree disappeared from her sight. Hopefully Baelan would appear by her and not see it. She'd done her best.
"Arowyn?" As if she'd called him, his voice echoed in the now foggy landscape. "Master?"
"Here. And don't call me that," she added.
He came out of the fog, thankfully from the opposite direction. The mist clung to him, swirled around him, and her breath caught at the sight. It suited him, accentuating his strange gray beauty. Head tipped up, his eyes focused on the fortress behind her, she couldn't help but stare. How could such a sweet and seemingly innocent face belong to an assassin? Gritting her teeth, she called his name, bringing his attention to her.
"How did you do this?" His voice held noticeable awe.
"In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not a normal human," she answered wryly.
"Apparently," he murmured, his eyes once again drawn to the towering walls behind her. After another long moment, they flicked up to her cloud-filled skies, then down and around as he surveyed the rest of the barren landscape. "So…" he paused and cleared his throat. "I've not done this before."
"Just do your best."
He ran a hand nervously over his hair. Neither of them mentioned the dangers she now faced. "You know how to heal, so you've moved yourself out of your mind and into your body." She nodded, even though she didn't have to. "Going into another's mind is similar, yet opposite. You will push your consciousness outward. You've felt the connection, when you mind-speak with others. Going into a mind is an extension of that. We touch," he held out a hand, "as a conduit in finding where we will go."
"Do you have to touch," she interrupted, remembering how Garen hadn't touched her the first time they met, and he briefly went into her mind to see an image of the missing Bo.
His brows drew down as he frowned. "That is how it is done. Perhaps some needn't, but becoming lost along the way would become much more likely."
"Understood."
"We will practice with my mind, going back and forth. I will guide you, which will make it much easier." His gaze flicked up to her fortress a
gain before he held out a hand. "Think of me, of entering my mind."
Gingerly, she slipped her hand into his, surprised to find it shook slightly. "I can do this," she assured him.
Lips pressed tightly together, he held her gaze for a long moment. "Don't let go of my hand."
"I won't."
He paused and did the thing where he went to say something and then changed his mind. For a moment he stared down at their joined hands and then rolled his shoulders and straightened, turning his gaze back to her. "Ready?"
With a nod, she closed her eyes and concentrated on Baelan. She felt a pull…a shift, and for a moment, disorientated.
"Open your eyes."
Baelan's mind was…unexpected. Opening her eyes, she found herself standing within a dark forest, the Elf beside her and still holding her hand.
The black trees drew her attention. Tall, spindly things with reaching empty branches, they looked…burnt. Despite the lack of leaves, the shadows they cast appeared larger than they should be. She couldn't see the sky above her, yet a faint light came from somewhere. As she stared, trying to figure it out, a breath whooshed out of him.
"Don't look too closely." His fingers squeezed hers briefly before he let go, drawing her attention back to him. His eyes darted about and he frowned, pushing hair from his face with trembling hands. "Come, this isn't a good place."
He took off through the strange trees surrounding them. After a step, she paused at the crunching sound beneath her feet and looked down. The ground was covered with bones. "Baelan?"
Stopping a few steps ahead of her, he turned, but didn't meet her gaze. It occurred to her then, he didn't want her in his mind any more than she wanted him in hers.
"Is it…safe here?"
A twisted laugh escaped him. "Of course, my lovely. Everyone here is already dead." He gave her a dark smile. "Almost." With that he turned and stalked off through the twisted, black trees. Stopped. Turned abruptly and went in the opposite direction.
Her mouth opened and closed a few times before she quickly followed. Almost? What did he mean almost? Almost dead or almost everyone? A shiver ran down her spine.
"Baelan, wait!"
She walked gingerly, the crunching of the bones beneath her feet unnerving. Pausing, she looked around and shuddered. This dark forest, the bones, they reminded her too much of some of her own nightmares.
Silence surrounded her, and she jerked her head around. "Baelan?" Moving forward, searching the dark shadows, the crunch of bones beneath her feet echoed too loudly.
"Come, come with me…"
She rushed forward at the sound of his singing voice. Why was he singing?
My darling one,
My everything,
To the sea, to the sea.
Of course, he had a beautiful tenor and the lilting tune of the simple song was almost comforting as she hunted for him within the shadows.
"Baelan," she half-whispered.
Come, come with me,
Side by side,
On the cliffs,
By the sea, by the sea.
She followed his voice, pausing once more when wisps of a faint glowing fog began to swirl around the bases of the trees. It gave her more light though, so she continued to follow his voice.
Watch, watch with me,
My darling one,
The sun set,
On the sea, on the sea.
She sped up, worry setting in as no matter how far she walked he never seemed to get any closer. Jerking, she almost tripped as something snagged her pants.
Horror choked her scream away. A boney hand clutched her pants. The fingers moving, trying to grab her leg.
"Baelan!" She kicked the hand away and bolted toward his voice, raising her hands to protect her face from slapping black branches. Brighter light ahead urged her on and she broke into a small clearing, only to stop abruptly.
Glowing fog swirled around the Elf as he sang and danced. She couldn't look away from the morbid sight as he swung his partner around. A skeleton. He danced with a skeleton.
"Die, die with me," he sang softly now, his spinning dance slowing.
My forever,
My sorrow,
In the sea, in the sea.
He stopped, staring down at the grinning skull with such sadness her breath caught. Then he stepped back abruptly, spreading his arms. The bones crashed into a pile by his feet…and he laughed.
Looking up, his wild eyes met hers and he tipped his head to the side. Smiling brightly, he danced off into the trees.
Words evaded her. The Elf truly was insane.
Bones crunched next to her and she jumped, turning quickly to find…Baelan.
"Did you get lost?"
"No…I…" Whipping her head around she searched the shadows and swore she did briefly catch sight of silver hair before it disappeared. Was there more than one of him? Could it be a trick?
A small smile curved his lips and she narrowed her eyes at him. "Come along then," he said lightly, like she hadn't just seen the most terrifyingly bizarre scene ever.
"Wither me," she muttered, dashing after him quickly.
∞ ∞ ∞
"Where are you?" Somehow, she'd lost the rotting Elf again. Tramping over the crunching bones, she glared into the shadows. They weren't supposed to be playing games. She was supposed to be learning so she could save Kei.
"Here," he whispered in her ear.
She jerked and turned, but he wasn't there.
"You understand, don't you," he continued softly. "I saw it in those lovely eyes. Bones, bones, bones…"
Clenching her fists, she spun around again. "Stop it."
"Bones are death. You know death, don't you, Arowyn?"
His words slammed into her and she froze, closing her eyes. "Yes."
"We are more alike than I thought." His fingers slid gently across her cheek, but when her eyes snapped open he wasn't there.
She shook her head at his words. She wasn't an assassin, a killer. She wasn't crazy. Searching the shadows again, she still couldn't see him. With an irritated huff and a touch of fear, she set out again. "This isn't funny. We're supposed to–"
Arms wrapped around her from behind, pulling her to the side. "Don't step there."
She froze again. He didn't let go of her. The heat of his body pressed against her back, his breath once again by her ear. The soft warmth of it, of him, disarmed her. It shouldn't have. What was he doing to her? "Why?"
"Trap."
She scowled. "I think your whole mind is a crazy trap," she muttered.
"Yes, actually. It is. Very good, my lovely." His cheek pressed against hers. "You pass the test."
"Test?" She turned in his arms, glaring up at him and not caring he didn't step back at all. No, she wasn't going to play that game. Not with him. "You're supposed to be teaching me."
A childish grin crossed his lips and he laughed as he tipped his head to the side. "The lesson is the test. Or the test is the lesson. You understand now, minds are dangerous places. You never know what you'll see. You must always be on your guard and," he leaned in closer, his nose almost touching hers, "fear can kill you. Some traps manifest your fear. Understand?"
Nodding, she fought not to let him intimidate her and make her step away. His gaze dropped to her lips and her eyes narrowed. Rotting Elf. Raising a hand between them, she slapped it against his chest and pushed him a step away.
"Good." Moving past her, he grabbed a hand and pulled her along behind him. "On we go." Still walking swiftly, it wasn't long before he spoke again. "Are you really afraid of skeleton hands grabbing your feet?"
How much had he seen? A stupid question. This was his mind, he probably saw everything.
"Wrong question perhaps? Are you afraid of me kissing you?" He turned his head to see her response. "Or just feeling anything at all for me?"
Glaring at him, she didn't answer. Crazy Elf. She didn't feel anything at all for him but anger and some lingering hatred. And pity, she
decided.
He chuckled and turned forward again, singing under his breath. "Walk, walk with me…"
"I hate the sea," she whispered.
His singing stopped abruptly, but he kept walking.
Finally, he pulled her into another clearing. Eyes wide, she stumbled behind him as he walked into the center and then stopped. With a soft sigh, he closed his eyes and tipped his head back.
Sunshine lit his face, the light accentuating his strange ghostly beauty. Long dark lashes fanning out against his flawless skin. His striking features highlighted by his beautiful silver hair. Even the scar he hated so much seemed to fit him. He was so brokenly stunning she wanted to reach out and slide her fingers down his cheeks. Across his perfect Elven lips...
Quickly turning her gaze to the flowers surrounding them, she smashed down such thoughts. It wasn't him. His mind was playing tricks on her. He was doing it on purpose.
Turning her head away, a tower in the distance caught her attention. An overwhelming rush of sorrow crashed into her and she quickly looked away, blinking back tears. Wither me, his mind is insane!
The flowers were an easy distraction. She'd never seen so many different kinds. So beautiful and bursting with many colors.
A place of such beauty and light existed in his twisted mind? "What is this place?"
His hand squeezed hers and it disturbed her she hadn't even noticed he still held it. "Everyone has good moments in their life. I treasure the few I have and keep them safe." His lips quirked into another smile. "It is also the only place in here that won't try to drive you insane."
Her eyes found his again, and the calm, sane look on his face confused her even more. "Can I make a place like this?"
"In your mind, you can do as you wish. You know that."
She supposed she did, but had never done much more than build her fortress.
"Now that I've found it again, we will practice coming here. Only here." His fingers tightened on hers as she tried to figure out what he meant by that. "Always come here if you enter my mind, Arowyn. It is the only safe place for you." Once she nodded her understanding, he took one more look around, a quiet sated sigh escaping before he pulled her closer. "Now, back to your mind."
