Trump Sky Alpha

by Mark Doten

  We’re going to rebuild anything in this beautiful country that needs it, rebuild it much better than anything that was lost to these animals, and that has been greatly, greatly exaggerated. We’re doing very, very well. You hear that, Ivanka? I know how to build and if it was lost it is not really lost, it is going back better, just fabulous.

  Ooh! There goes Poland, looks like, ooh, that looks like a bad one, looks like we lost Kazakhstan, I’m going to turn off these video screens, it’s really distracting, the incompetence, the sheer incompetence of these people and their security precautions.

  Maybe we won’t rebuild the Capitol building, not for a few years. Wouldn’t that be nice? Some of these people, they need to be in prison, not a beautiful fabulous piece of real estate. Unbelievable what some of them are saying. Just unbelievable.

  They say some things, and then they repeat it overseas, this dishonest, completely fabricated stuff, and it’s criminal, it really is, it’s to the point where you even have a dishonest prime minister saying that what I’m doing is going to end civilization as we know it.

  I wish I had that power.

  As for the Pentagon, they can just stay in Trump Tower for now, we’ve got all the room we need there, wouldn’t that be great, me and all my generals there in Trump Tower.

  They’re really happy with what’s going on. It’s something that’s been very well received. By the generals and even by the press, it’s been very well received.

  But why is it so cold? When what I’m talking about is getting a handle on radical Islamic terrorists and refugees that are all over the place. The last guy let them come in by the thousands and thousands—they’re in our farms and cities. We have radical Islamic terrorists and they have to be killed. And in this same prime minister’s country, it’s really funny to me, you have people in his country there blowing up whole cities, families blown to bits, children, little crying children, you see arms and legs, disgusting, people blown up, hacked up, people running absolutely wild around all these people who are blown up, and these problems started with people he let in, the refugees he let in by the thousands and thousands.

  And somehow I get the blame.

  I honor all people military or otherwise that were killed and I think it’s very important to do so. I honor the people that were killed in Benghazi, needlessly killed in Benghazi, under Crooked Hillary.

  Cough, cough.

  But when you have parts of the military that are not obeying orders that are not doing what they need to do, then those people will be dealt with, and it’s being handled.

  My understanding is that some elected officials are among those being talked to, some military, but this is a military operation, so I don’t have all the details. Whatever our response is, it’s all vetted by generals. It’s all been very carefully vetted, and if something goes wrong, people are going to try to blame me, but it’s not me. I don’t mind protesters, but you have to be honest. I don’t want the credit but I shouldn’t get these attacks. Not when it’s not true.

  The generals give me the codes, and they’re very beautiful. Some other generals, they need to be dealt with, but it’s all been vetted.

  I was viciously attacked, so I just have to sit there?

  With the White House, when it comes to the White House, we are going to start over and it is going to be much, much better, really fantastic, that place was falling apart, Ivanka said to me, when we first moved in, she said to me, she looked at the first lady quarters, she said, What a dump. I mean they almost did us a favor, I think Ivanka would have said that …

  So let’s see what happens, hopefully the White House will be fine, but the Southern, I mean the Winter White House, or the Southern White House, that’s what some people have begun calling it, Mar-a-Lago, the Summer White House, that’s what they call it. Maybe that’s where we’ll go, my people, my family that are still my family, my Ivanka, we’ll live there. Mar-a-Lago, she can go there with me, the old White House, you don’t have to sit in a place like that, do you, Ivanka, it’s still a free country.

  It doesn’t matter what Ivanka would have said.

  Doesn’t everyone’s family come and go? You tell me.

  I’ve known girls and boys, women, adult sons. Weren’t there so many, so many that were something to me?

  Isn’t there a new life? Someone, someone talked about it, the evil, how we wouldn’t take it, and some mercy that was really the best.

  There’s planes swooping in, look at our boys go, swooping in and out and all around. But it’s cold. If you’re listening, open your mouth, take out a mirror, look inside your mouth. If you’ve got gold in your teeth, open wide, let me see it when I land, we need some gold in here. They’ll go around, they’ll collect the jewelry and the watches, so if you could just open your mouths.

  They’ll knock on your door and ask for the gold you’ve got, it’s fine, it’s just something they have to do now, just go along with it.

  Does it get cold or hot when you’re way up in the air? I thought it was hot way up by the sun, but it’s setting, that’s true, and it’s so cold. The sun is setting, but there’s lights at the horizon from all directions, ringing us around, just beautiful.

  The number of people that have died in this country, now that has been greatly, greatly exaggerated.

  I mean that’s what people do for ratings. You see all these people who are dead, the mounds of people where no one can figure out who they are, and let me tell you, when it’s even people, when it’s not just decoys that some terrorists shoestringed together, when the mounds are actually people, what it is, is it’s the people the last guy let in here and we have no idea who they were, no documentation, no idea where they came from, people coming in by the tens of thousands having some sort of civil war with each other, and that’s why they’re all scattered across the streets and stacked up in mounds. If they want to make it easy on us by just killing each other, be my guest.

  It’s easy to think, Hey, let’s let it happen, why should I help all the fake news media who are trying to destroy me? The New York Times, if I made certain decisions, would not be the failing New York Times, but the smoldering New York Times.

  I love the media, and I know you love me, but you’ve got to have balance.

  Maybe there’s some people that should be smoldering.

  Maybe there’s lots of things that would be better off as smoldering wrecks, and that would clean them up.

  There’s a map, on Twitter, here’s a map of how it is now, with me, and how much worse it would be if it was Hillary. Look at that. Almost total devastation. That’s what people don’t understand.

  They dislike me, the liberal media dislikes me. I mean I watch people—I was always the best at what I did, I was the—I was, you know, I went to the—I went to the Wharton School of Finance, did well. I went out, I—I started in Brooklyn, in a Brooklyn office with my father, I became one of the most successful real estate developers, one of the most successful businesspeople. I created maybe the greatest brand, and the greatest presidency. I was successful, successful, successful. I was always the best athlete, people don’t know that. But I was successful at everything I ever did and then I run for president, first time—first time, not three times, not six times. I run for president first time and lo and behold, I win. And then people say, Oh, is he a smart person? I’m smarter than all of them put together, but they can’t admit it. They had a bad year.

  So a few things are blowing up? Things are always blowing up. Maybe it’s a good thing.

  You have a corrupt media and they’re saying I’m responsible for this.

  I’ve done nothing wrong, and that’s been proven over and over, but the fake news won’t understand.

  Something isn’t right.

  It’s cold in here. I’m in my beautiful Trump Sky Alpha, and there’s gold spokes on the wheel and I know there’s gold all over, but it’s all smudged. I need more gold—I need to see it. If you’re listening at home, it’s time for the gold. O
pen up those jewelry boxes—hold what gold you’ve got out the windows. Who’s got gold fillings? Let me see those chompers. Look up in the sky and open your mouths and let me see those chompers with the gold.

  I’ll send some guys around. Hand in your gold jewelry, your watches and jewelry, and then let’s talk about the teeth. I need what’s in your teeth.

  I used to live in golden rooms above the city. You’ve seen them, all those pictures, me and my family in golden rooms.

  My daughter, she says to me, she says, Daddy, no, and then she goes on TV and she says it. She’s disgusting. It’s just disgusting. She says no no no, the fake news take that to mean that she thinks what I’m doing is wrong, that we have a choice, that this isn’t what we want. Really? We have a choice?

  Such a lie. And they know it’s a lie! And spread the word, folks, but they know it’s a lie. She’s a baby, she’s being a baby. And I don’t throw babies out, believe me. I love babies! I love my children, I love babies. I don’t throw babies out, believe me.

  We just need some gold.

  Wherever you are, if you’re watching this, if we can open up some of the computers, there’s gold in some of those, gold in the wires.

  Gold chips, gold pins and lids, all those computer chips from all those fantastic companies.

  I mean, my own daughter, I thought she was smart, she says no no no? What a baby.

  And she thinks just because we’ve lost some family that we’re lost somehow? Let me tell you, we have lost some family, they’ve lost a lot of families out there, and that’s why we have to do it, we don’t have to be babies about it.

  We just do it.

  We do what we have to do.

  I don’t lose often. I almost never lose. I have worked hard. It has not been easy for me, it has not been easy for me. And you know I started off in Queens, my father gave me a small loan, and I made so much more. So much money.

  Those tenants complained. They complained so much. Families, poor families, rooms that are dirty, rooms that were wrong, babies that were screaming, little babies who didn’t get it at all. I’d do a walk-through, I’d say, You don’t have to sit here in the cold.

  You can reach right up and fix it.

  Don’t ask me to fix it, you do it.

  The years with your children are gold, they say that’s the golden age. My kids, they’re not kids anymore, but they’re kids as far as I’m concerned. They’ll always be my kids. Even the kids that aren’t anymore, these are my kids, kids come and go.

  I have made a great deal of money and success by getting into certain businesses and getting out of others, and it’s been really fantastic for me. And internationally speaking, yes, we have to get out of certain businesses and get into others, and it can all be very, very profitable, for us as a country, right now. The things and events that have happened—terrible, terrible things—the terrible things all around the world that are happening are things from the weakness and the rot that the last guy put in it, but there is still profit there to be made if you get out right.

  I would say, Ivanka, read the polls, this is all so popular, and we can get out, too, get out of things that are failing, I am very good with getting out. Ivanka, look at yourself, your mouth and your hair, look at how beautiful you are. And I would say, What did I do? What did I do? Look at my mouth and my hair. Aren’t we the same? I loved you, you know?

  And the other. Wasn’t there one? How many are there? How many children do I have?

  On TV someone cut my head off, and they all cried. I had to tell them, it’s not me. I’m still right here. Hey, kids, your daddy, he’s still alive and he’s going to be alive a very, very long time.

  Maybe forever.

  They’re saying now you can live forever, and maybe it’s really true. Maybe it’s true. It could be true.

  So if I’m going to live forever, how is it that I’m expected to apologize?

  How am I supposed to live forever with an apology when it’s not even fair?

  You’re puking, and I should apologize?

  Look, Ivanka puked on TV and that’s not nice to look at.

  Should I apologize? I think apologizing’s a great thing, but you have to be wrong. I will absolutely apologize, sometime in the hopefully distant future, if I’m ever wrong.

  She has said all of these terrible things, no no no. And I have a terrific relationship with the generals, and we’ve got all these generals saying I’m right, so I should listen to her? If we could just get some of you with the gold teeth to just wrench them out, if people near them would help them wrench them out, and collect the jewelry, all of it, whatever you got, and I’ll send some guys to pick it all up. All these generals who will pass me the code and I have to say I’m wrong somehow?

  People say I have sacrificed no one and lost no one and I have lost people. I have lost, I have lost—the people I lost are some of the best people you could ever lose, and the people doing the saying are garbage.

  Ivanka, honey.

  She is so beautiful, I mean what a girl.

  If she wasn’t my own daughter?

  She’s gold.

  Her beauty that’s gold came through me, and anyone can see that. Anyone can see it. But there is another beauty, inside and out, you could cut her open and see a whole new way of being beautiful.

  A father could cut open his daughter or really just open like a door in her side and find the beauty inside, and find that everything is gold in there, like clockwork.

  They say a king touches his food and it becomes gold, and he can’t eat it, but I can.

  I can eat gold.

  I can eat all kinds of gold.

  And I know that she has lost people, and that she feels lost, but she hasn’t lost me.

  Together with the gold that’s in us, together we’d be in a golden room, all our gold animals, the tigers and singing birds, it would be so fabulous.

  If she wants to lose me then that’s fine.

  You hear that, honey? It’s just fine.

  Your call.

  Be a baby.

  I really could care less.

  So they’re blowing up everyone all around us, so they’re attacking all that, all of us.

  Whoa.

  Whoa! That was a big one, but folks, I’m fine, this beautiful aircraft, they call it the Crystal Palace of the Sky, but look at us, we’re still flying, more beautiful than ever.

  It’s the kind of thinking you need, it’s phenomenal, that we’re still flying, it’s all excellent, the best deal. It’s complicated, but it will be, it will be one of the great deals.

  Mar-a-Lago, it’s not so far off now, it’s right on schedule, maybe there’ll be some extra lights there, maybe a few flames, but it’s the Winter White House, fabulous.

  I hope everyone listening is okay. I wish I could see you all, I know you all look great, you really do. I think people haven’t been sleeping well, it’s affecting their brains.

  Not me. I sleep like a baby, it’s true.

  Where do you think my old opponent is? Old and sick and dead, I guarantee.

  If they knock at your door and ask for some gold, don’t make a fuss.

  Maybe just leave it outside your front door. But keep an eye on it—don’t let anyone take it until my guys are there.

  We’re all sharing now, if I could offer the generals one piece of advice, I’d say, Let’s wrap up the things in gold. If we’re going to use these things no one has ever used, shouldn’t they be gold? I mean no one has used them before so let’s wrap them in gold leaf, gold filigree, more karats than you’ve ever seen, a world record, beautiful, fabulous, it’s better than anyone’s ever done, in gold.

  They said it couldn’t be done, we’ve done it.

  Some people may be knocking, do what they say, no fuss, no problem. If they say go with them, go with them. If they say open your mouth, you open wide.

  Last night I dreamed of El Dorado, of the seven cities of gold.

  I dreamed of Heron of Alexandria, who bo
iled his daughter’s body and chopped up the corpse into little bits, and he made a fabulous new family of clockwork and bone and gold, and set it free in the world, and that family, that family has been making their way ever since, it’s true, through all those centuries.

  I dreamed of all the presidents, and they were all, this is true, they were dead meat, it turned out you know that they were just dead meat in their graves, and then I saw the emperors of old who were still living, black robes with gold brocade, these huge black robes with gleaming golden fringe, nodding and welcoming me in.

  Why shouldn’t the last guy have gone out there and done something about the thugs, come out of retirement, before he died?

  You’ve got to wonder about that guy, you really do.

  There’s computer chips in the walls, all around our great country, there’s chips in the walls, little trilobites running around in the walls plated gold, it’s true.

  You can break into the walls and grab them, grab one and pop it in my mouth, when I land.

  Bring me a bite.

  Bring me back a bite for when I land.

  Open up your mouth.

  With all the people whose doors we’ve knocked on and whose gold we’re getting, or whose bones we’re getting down there on the ground, or will get when all this is wrapped up, when I’m not way up here in Trump Sky Alpha.

  We’ve got gold leaf right here on the ship’s wheel, on the spokes and handles, and I can eat it off anytime I want.

  It feels like it’s finally getting warm.

  Is it just me or is it finally getting warm in here?

  Part of me feels hot and part of me doesn’t.

  Part of me feels really, really hot and part is ice.

  Are we getting some gold?

  We’ve got gold at Mar-a-Lago, I can’t wait to see all that gold.

  I’m going to wrap it up in even more, even more gold than we’ve had, and we’ve had so much, so much.

  The biggest mansion in Florida, who knows, it may be the biggest in the country by now, depending on what’s happening.