William Shakespeare's Jedi the Last
Page 6
My newfound friends attempt to reach them still.
8 Editor’s translation: It shall be done, if I can keep these creatures
From eating all th’equipment on the ship.
SCENE 4.
Aboard the Raddus, and in Canto Bight.
Enter VICE ADMIRAL AMILYN HOLDO and LIEUTENANT CONNIX above, on balcony.
HOLDO Thy scanner beep’d, Lieutenant—wherefore so?
CONNIX ’Twas nothing, Admiral—debris now pass’d.
[Exit Holdo.
Thus do I play conspirator today,
And shroud the hidden plan of Rose and Finn.
The beep the admiral hath heard was that
Of their small transport ship departing from
Our cruiser. I must stand with Poe herein—
Respect Vice Adm’ral Holdo as befits,
Yet work to make a better day for us.
[Exit Connix.
Enter ROSE TICO, FINN, and BB-8 below, in transport pod.
FINN The fleet hath only eighteen hours of fuel.
We must make fervent haste to Canto Bight.
ROSE Comes Canto Bight in sight, now drawing near.
And we’ll complete our task sans much ado.
Sneak in, then take the codebreaker away—
Indeed, ’tis the extent of our agenda.
Next, we depart the codebreaker withal,
Our fleet to rescue and our friends to save.
FINN Of this town know’st thou aught? This Canto Bight?
ROSE By reputation, not experience.
The stories of this place are legendary—
Rife with the worst of people thou shalt find
In any place within the galaxy.
Let’s stow the ship upon the beach below,
And slip into the club to find our man.
[Exeunt Rose, Finn, and BB-8.
Enter CHORUS.
CHORUS Behold, the matte of space becomes a sheen
By riches gor’ly deck’d—’tis Canto Bight!
No place is mirèd in such wealth obscene
As here doth bond the patrons night by night.
[Exit Chorus.
Enter various CASINO WORKERS, GUESTS, and two POLICEMEN.
GUEST 1 [to policemen:] I told the knaves, “This is a public beach,
Ye cannot park your shuttle hereupon.”
They paid no heed, but made their way inside—
Rush’d to the warmth and light of the casino
An ’twere their very lives depended on’t.
[Exeunt Guest 1 and policemen.
Enter ROSE TICO, FINN, and BB-8 in the casino.
FINN What feast, preparèd for mine eager eyes!
The opulence and affluence herein,
These rooms of games, each diff’rent from the next.
Such creatures as I’ve never seen before,
From small to large and sizes in between.
Folks e’en in hologram do walk about,
The people all sophisticates, and fair,
Where corks do fly and hearty drinks abound.
I fain would know, good Rose, what thou didst mean
In saying Canto Bight is passing foul?
To me, the place is pure delight and fun.
ROSE Be not persuaded by what thou dost see—
Remember thou our task. Maz said the man,
The master codebreaker, would wear a red
Plom bloom upon his doublet. Let us find
The man herein, flee to our waiting ship,
And then fly hence before an hour hath pass’d.
GUEST 2 [to BB-8:] Thou spherical and hearty orange dome—
Though I am in my cups, I’ll warrant thou
Art some new-fangl’d game for me to play.
I’ll put my ducat in and try my luck.
BB-8 Zoomblic bloo bleereej zzwaflli blis blayblee!
GUEST 2 But one coin more and—urp!—my luck may change.
FINN No matter what we fix our eyes upon,
A red plom bloom we have not found herein.
Where is this man, of whom Maz fondly spake?
[The casino begins to shake.
ROSE Of just one creature have I ever heard,
Which could the building shake with such great force.
Come, Finn, let’s look outside. Yea, there, below!
Observe the cause of all the tremoring,
Down there, in stride upon the racing track.
FINN Such creatures, noble, wonderful—and fast!
What are they call’d? For I do know them not.
ROSE They are call’d fathiers. Never have I seen
A real one—they are wondrous to behold.
FINN This place entire is beautiful, is’t not?
Then, wherefore dost it so inspire thine ire?
ROSE Look thou more closely on what thou dost see—
My sister Paige and I were rais’d within
A mining system poor and desolate.
The rank First Order stripp’d our hard-earn’d ore
To fund their military, then did turn
The weapons they created back on us—
A perfect, feeble, helpless, testing ground.
FINN Forsooth, thou speakest true, I see it now—
The jockeys driving fathiers with a shock,
Brutality among the fathiers’ keepers,
And children are but playthings for the strong.
ROSE They did purloin from us all that we had.
Who then, dost thou imagine these, the people
Of Canto Bight, may be? There is but one
Sole enterprise that maketh one so rich,
Wherever thou art in the galaxy.
FINN The industry of war.
ROSE —Thou hast it, Finn.
These people proffer weapons—for a price—
Unto our enemies, e’en the First Order.
I would my fist could crush the town entire,
Despite the beauty on the surface of’t.
FINN [aside:] Lo, how a Rose e’er blooming ’fore my eyes—
The lady shows a striking sense of right.
BB-8 Flib flit zilfrooh flig bleeflli zoom reej zzwa
Roilblis zoonflit blip bleerooq flir bluublic
Blav blooflew zoodblox bleeblay flibzooz flir
Bloxblee reej zzwa zoonblik blip bleeblis flir!
FINN Thou found’st him, BB-8? He is herein?
ROSE The red plom bloom we shall behold at last!
Enter MASTER CODEBREAKER with two LADIES.
FINN Red plom bloom, by my troth! How fine a man!
ROSE The master codebreaker! We’ll yet succeed.
CODEBR. I am no doctor, no, but codebreaker,
Now comes my tale from Canto Bight with love.
These skill’d gold fingers mine are us’d to crack
Encryptions strong as thunder, balls of lightning.
Right is it said: one only liveth twice:
Not once upon her maj’sty’s secret service
Am I e’er found, for diamonds are forever—
’Tis money’s my joy. Live and let th’die roll!
I’m th’man who hath the golden gunnysack—
Once loyal to the spy who lov’d me but
Now loyal to the gold moon. Rake her in!
Again I’ll win for thine eyes only, pet.
Let me get thee unlock’d—O puss, e’en so!
(Methinks thou ought to ne’er say ne’er again.)
A double! Ha, view two! A killing I
Now make. Yea, I shall roll the living daylights
Out of these dice, no lie. Sense to kill I
’ve,
For with a golden eye comes golden sight.
My money proves tomorrow never dies—
Yea, e’en the world is not enough for me.
So let me die another day—tonight,
To this casino, royal I shall be!
E’en so, a quantum of solace I’ll give,
Respecting those who lose. O sky, fall low—
Yea, ev’ry specter of a code I’ll break.
Enter GUEST 1 and two POLICEMEN.
GUEST 1 These two are they, the errant shuttle parkers.
[The policemen strike Rose and Finn with their electro-shock stun prods.
POLICE. 1 Ye two are under Canto Bight detention,
For these, your many parking violations.
[To BB-8:] And thou, unwanted, naughty little droid,
Thou hereby art forever bann’d. Out, out!
[Exit BB-8. Exeunt policemen holding Rose and Finn, severally.
GUEST 2 What was this odd disturbance, dost thou know?
CODEBR. ’Twas nothing pet—some situation droll.
Pray, stop thy mouth: this man is on a roll.
[Exeunt.
SCENE 5.
On Ahch-To.
Enter LUKE SKYWALKER on balcony.
Enter REY below, practicing with her quarterstaff.
LUKE The girl below: what grace and speed and strength,
See how she spins and parries with her staff,
Exemplar of a mighty warrior.
Though I have shown to her my harsher side,
The truth is that the lady doth impress
By her persistence, readiness, and skill.
Had I a diff’rent past, more life to live,
And aptitude to take on such as she,
I would most gladly train her as a Jedi.
What’s this? She now doth trade her quarterstaff
For my lightsaber, testing newfound skills!
E’en with this unfamiliar tool is she
A talented and brilliant student. Yea,
This nat’ral aptitude I’ve long’d to see.
But O—no sooner did I think this thought
Than she hath swip’d the hulking rock before her.
It splits an ’twere a heated knife through butter,
And falls, straight down the mountainside below.
Ha! It hath crush’d a caretaker’s wheelbarrow—
I’ll hear of that before the day is through.
Away now, Luke, before Rey is aware
Thou watch’dst her here upon the craggy bluff.
[Exit Luke from balcony.
REY Good Master Luke was there—he saw me ply
My craft with quarterstaff and lightsaber.
He turns aside, that I’ll not see him there.
What cross’d his mind whilst he did watch my drills?
Enter LUKE SKYWALKER.
LUKE The second lesson shall be thine today.
The Jedi, having been extinct for ages,
Become the things of legends, stories, tales,
The subject for a wand’ring minstrel’s song.
If thou wouldst take away the pow’r of myth,
To look upon their deeds, and those alone,
’Tis clear their legacy is utter failure,
Hypocrisy and hubris were their sins.
REY Speak thou not so, for thy words falsely ring.
LUKE The moment when they had the greatest pow’r,
E’en in that matchless time they fail’d to stop
Darth Sidious, who rose to prominence
And form’d the Empire, which destroy’d them all.
A Jedi Master was responsible
For training and creation of Darth Vader.
REY A Jedi, too, who sav’d him ere he died.
The evilest, most hated man who liv’d
In all the annals of the galaxy,
Yet thou didst recognize the good within,
The conflict that he felt inside his soul.
Thou didst believe the man within remain’d,
He was not gone and e’en could still be turn’d.
LUKE Thus did I write myself into a legend.
For many years the Force had balance full,
Then Ben arriv’d, my nephew whom I lov’d.
His strong Skywalker blood did lure my pride,
Convinc’d me I could train him, pass to him
Mine ev’ry skill, make him a Jedi Knight.
Han did approach my plan as e’er Han did—
A scoundrel sees a scoundrel ev’rywhere—
But Leia trusted me with her own son.
I took him and a dozen other students,
Began a training temple, rife with hope.
Before I realiz’d I could not forfend
The rising of the darkness in his heart,
’Twas far too late.
REY —What happen’d? Prithee tell.
LUKE I went, by night, there to confront the boy—
And he did turn on me, did use the Force
To bring his roof and beams upon my head,
Then ere I gain’d my consciousness, he fled.
He must have thought I’d died, or would have kill’d me.
I rous’d myself, and from the wreckage rose,
And saw the temple burning, embers wild,
My hopes and dreams aflame in spark and ash.
Ben vanish’d with a group of students mine,
And kill’d the others even where they slept.
Kind Leia put the blame on Leader Snoke,
Yet it was I who should be blam’d. I fail’d
Because I had believ’d in mine own legend:
Luke Skywalker, the Jedi Master he.
REY Perchance the galaxy doth need a legend,
Aught into which we may put our belief.
I someone need, to show me how I fit,
How I, mere pawn, shall be plac’d on the board.
It was not thou who failèdst Kylo Ren,
Instead, ’twas Kylo Ren who failèd thee.
Yet I shall not—Rey ever true shall be.
[Exeunt.
SCENE 1.
Aboard the Finalizer, the Anodyne, and the Raddus.
Enter GENERAL HUX and CAPTAIN PEAVEY aboard the Finalizer.
PEAVEY They manage to remain out of our range,
Yet here is something that shall make thee smile:
Their frigate medical is out of fuel,
With shields unarm’d, an ’twere a sitting duck.
HUX We witness the beginning of their end.
Destroy it, on the instant. Let them bleed.
[Exeunt Hux and Peavey.
Enter the CAPTAIN of the Anodyne above, on balcony.
Enter VICE ADMIRAL AMILYN HOLDO, COMMANDER D’ACY, and LIEUTENANT CONNIX, below, aboard the Raddus.
Enter POE DAMERON, aside.
CAPTAIN Our crew hath been evacuated, ma’am,
In transports gone to thee, and thereby safe.
’Twas e’er an honor, thee to serve, Vice Adm’ral.
I die for right. Godspeed, ye rebels brave!
[Captain dies as the Anodyne is destroyed.
CONNIX Vice Admiral, our fuel reserves do stand
At just six hours—then they shall be no more.
HOLDO Maintain our current course. Yea, steady on!
POE [aside:] O Finn, O Rose, where are ye? Shall you two
Be caught within this mighty tempest toss?
We shall not long survive this terr’ble loss.
[Exeunt.
SCENE 2.
In the prison in Canto Bight.
Enter POLICEMAN
1 with other POLICEMEN and BB-8 severally.
Enter ROSE TICO and FINN aside, in a cell.
Enter DJ behind them, hidden.
POLICE. 1 Hail, hearty lads, let’s have a hand of cards.
POLICEMEN [singing:] Heigh-ho! Raise a glass
To our home Canto Bight,
Where the gambling is fine
And the prices are right.
Where the guests are all rich
But their tips are all slight!
Heigh-ho! Raise a glass
To our home Canto Bight,
Hear, hear! Sing a song
Of our home Canto Bight,
Where the days are pure glee
And the nights a delight!
Where our prospects are grim
But our future looks bright!
Hear, hear! Sing a song
Of our home Canto Bight!
BB-8 Bluureej blik zzwaflit bliczood blikroil blis!
[Exeunt policemen and BB-8.
ROSE Finn, hear: our fleet is nearly out of fuel,
Without a talented codebreaker to
Get us upon the Star Destroyer, how
Shall we make good our plan?
FINN —Fie, fie upon’t!
Unless thou, by some chance, dost keep a thief
Within thy pocket, all our plans are finish’d.
DJ [emerging:] I can do it, could do it, capable am.
ROSE What sayest thou? Who speaks?
DJ —What? Who? When? Why?
ROSE What’s this? Again I ask: what sayest thou?
DJ Apologies, I could not help but hear—
Ye spoke so loudly, whilst I lay me down,
Did try to slumber, sleep, somnambulate.
Codebreaker? Thief? I am the man you need.
FINN We speak not merely of pickpocketing.
DJ Don’t, does he, do not judge me by my raiment.
Long have I been familiar with the codes
The shrewd First Order useth. Yea, long time.
Is, is it, if the price is right, I’ll break
Ye into sneak snake snuck Snoke’s private chamber.
FINN Nay, we are fine.
ROSE —We have the matter fix’d.
DJ Katogah. I’ll be on my way. Farewell.
[DJ short-circuits the cell door and walks out. Exit DJ.
FINN Hath he just found a way to—
ROSE —Verily!
We must depart anon! Finn, hither follow!
[Exeunt Rose and Finn, leaving the cell.
Enter DJ.