by Annie Brewer
He smirks, “Absolutely nothing.” And then our lips crush together. My hands explore his pants area, moving them off his hips. His greedy hands squeeze my ass as his lips trail sensual kisses from my throat to my belly button. I arch my back, feeling tingles between my legs, which worsen when his fingers find their way down there, around there. I moan, raising myself up to meet his lips. “Fuck Noah, fuck.” I say against his mouth, not making any sense.
“I don’t fuck, Maddy. Not anymore. I make love…to you, because you’re mine and I love you. Fucking knows no feelings, and I won’t do that with you. Ever. I need you, every bit of you.” His tongue grazes my teeth.
“We have to stop, we have to end this now. We have a plane to catch.”
“We’re going to be in New York for a few days, we’ll finish this there, with no distractions. I’ll show you how you make me feel. I’ll fulfill your every desire, this I promise you.”
I massage the back of his neck and feel his head push against my hand, enjoying the connection. “I believe you.”
“Good. Tell me about your nightmare. What was it about?” We clean the kitchen, finish packing and drink coffee, once we’ve calmed down and controlled our racing hearts.
“It was about flying. I had a couple nightmares that our plane crashed before we landed in New York. I’ve never flown so my head is a little jumbled with scary flying scenarios.”
He lifts my hand, up to his lips and presses a kiss on each finger. “You’re safe. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”
For his benefit, I smile. He makes me feel safe, so I’d trust him with my life. “Ready?” I nod, grasping onto my suitcase and carry on. Luckily we’re only there for five days, or I’d be packing two suitcases. But since we can only have one carry on, I’m okay.
“I’m ready.”
“I promise, I’ll be fine. If anything changes, I’ll call you. But don’t worry, enjoy your trip.” I hug Andi goodbye, partly guilty for leaving. I just hope nothing tragic happens while we’re gone.
“I love you. You’re the best friend, ever.” I hug her tight before Noah pulls her in an embrace as well.
“Take care of yourself.” He tells her sternly.
“Jesus, you both act like you’re going away for a year. Go! Have fun, you deserve it! I love you both!” We watch her get in her car, wave and leave.
“Time to go, babe.” He lifts our baggage and walks to the ticket booth. I remain still, staring out at the road Andi drove down. Please, don’t let anything happen, I say to myself.
I take my suitcase from Noah’s grip and check it in. We get our boarding passes, stand in line to get frisked and find our gate. My stomach knots up, tense with nerves. People scurry about, finding their place in this busy but small airport, either lost or late. I doubt they even worry about the planes crashing. “I need coffee. No, I need Xanax.”
“Hey.” I pace the walkway, glancing at the gift shop, then the Starbucks across from me. Noah grabs me by the shoulders, forcing me to stop and look him in the eyes. “You’re gonna be fine. Millions of planes fly daily and nothing happens.”
“What if we get on one that is broken and they don’t know it?” God, I need to shut up. I’m so paranoid.
“Okay, no more Final Destination movies for you. Come here,” he leads me to a seat and I sit, feeling like such a shithead for being so difficult. “Let’s play a game.”
“Sorry,” I motion with my hands, “I have no brownie mix.” I smirk.
“Well, you just ruined my entire trip.” He shoots back. “I guess I’ll have to find another hottie who has some batter.” I smack his chest with the back of my hand and he yelps, “Okay, okay. Maybe not.” He lays his arm across my knee, clasping our hands together. “I actually had a game in mind.”
“I’m intrigued; your games tend to border on erotic…which is great for when we’re alone. But uh, we’re not…so,” I take a deep breath, feeling slightly relaxed, “Hey, my anxiety is settling.” I kiss his cheek, pleased that I don’t have that nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach anymore. Maybe I can enjoy this plane ride afterall.
“That is perfect. So you wanna play my game?”
“Nah, why don’t we people watch instead? I like trying to figure out what their stories are.” Absently, Noah plays with our clasped hands, observing the passengers waiting for our plane. “Okay, so that chick there,” he discreetly points to a brunette sitting by the window, by herself with a frown on her face, “is returning home after finding out her boyfriend cheated on her and she’s mentally cursing herself for not hooking up with his best friend when she had the chance.”
I imagine how shitty her luck would be, feeling sorry for her. Hopefully that’s not the case. “Okay, um,” I look around and spot a blonde chatting with her girlfriend, “Okay, that blonde over there is telling her best friend about this guy who turned her world upside down. She’s clutching her phone, waiting for a text from him so she can experience the butterflies again for the first time in her life. But of course her best friend thinks she’s crazy and needs to get laid because such a love doesn’t exist.”
“Maybe her best friend just never felt the intense swarm of butterflies before or what a thrilling experience it is and doesn’t really think it exists. If she had, she’d understand.” Somehow our game has become personal.
“I’m nervous about meeting your mother.” I state in honesty. He blinks. His arm wraps around my side, pulling me close. “Honestly, I am too. But not because of you. I just worry about her health, well-being. I just want her to be okay. I know she’ll love you though.”
“She’ll be so happy to see you. You’ve changed so much since you moved. You should be proud. I know I am.” His head drops to my shoulder.
“You have a lot to do with that. When I was giving that toast at Derrick’s party, I wanted to tell you that you were the biggest reason that I’m happy and the move didn’t suck like I originally thought it would. But I didn’t want to be rude because my aunt and Derrick had some to do with it too.”
“I know. They’re the reason I didn’t go off the deep end all those years. And of course Andi’s family too.” I choke back my emotions, thinking about them. Noah holds me, comforts me and then kisses me before standing up.
“You still want that coffee?” I shake my head a little too eager. “I’ll be right back.” I look around at all the passengers. Dozens of planes have flown in the sky. They survived, and so will I.
Noah approaches me with a steaming cup of Joe. My hands snatch the cup from him on instinct. “Thank you.” He laughs.
“You’re gonna be fine.” Our flight begins boarding, finally. We gather our bags and get in line. “Ready?” He takes my hand, leading me away from home to a place I never thought I’d get to go.
Chapter 48
Noah
When I was little, before my life went to hell, I flew on my first plane with my parents. I was so excited, even though my father would yell at me for jumping all over the place, hyper. I mean, I was 5, flying on a plane, all kids are rambunctious and excited. But he chose to threaten me that if I didn’t sit quietly like a good little boy, he’d leave me behind in Florida where my grandparents were living at the time. So I sat quietly, but inside I was a Speedy Gonzalez. It wasn’t my favorite memory but it was worth remembering for this case.
I move my head to look at Maddy. She’s sitting up tall, holding her breath, gripping the shit out of the arm rest. I try not to laugh because it’s not funny but she just looks so cute…and funny. “Take my hand.” I hold mine out to her.
“I’m fine.” She grits her teeth, staring straight ahead.
“Babe, breathe. There’s nothing to it. Think happy thoughts.” I wish I’d brought a card game or something to distract her mind. “Wanna play hang man?” That’s the best I got now. It’s a stupid game, I know. She doesn’t answer right away, but then her expression changes to one of remembrance.
“Babe, please get me my bag. I have
a game we can play.”
I quickly get up and open the overhead compartment to find her bag and hand it to her. She opens it and shuffles through it, finding the object. “Okay, so we don’t have the space for the board and I don’t wanna lose the pieces. But here,” she hands me a box with cards. I inspect and open it.
“So we each pull out a card and search through some choices of questions. This game is so fun, but the questions are hilariously outrageous and sometimes embarrassing.”
“Sounds perfect. Let’s do it.” If it keeps her mind occupied on something other than the departure of our moving plane, I’ll do it. “You first.” She takes a card from the deck and reads them to herself, her expression changes several times.
“Okay, so…hold on,” Her eyes scan the card once more. “Okay, would you rather…have the nickname “Premature Jack” or “Little Peter”?” She looks to me for an answer. I think about it, on one hand, I’d hate to refer to my pecker as “little” but being known to ejaculate prematurely is not really ideal either. I squint my eyes in concentration. Well, it’s just for fun…
“Shit, I don’t like either of them. Can I pass?”
“Nope.” Damn, it was worth a try.
“Fine, I’ll go with “Little Peter”, even though I know the truth.
“Are you serious? That’s your answer?” She starts laughing and I wish…”Okay, sorry. I’m not laughing at you. These questions can really bruise an ego.”
“No kidding. At least I know the truth though. This is just for fun. And you know I have no problem with either…” I pick a card from the deck as she sticks her card in the back. I read through mine…holy shit, I’m not gonna be mean but these questions are hardcore. They’re even labeled, “embarrassing, food ingestion, random, pain” and such. “Okay, ready?” She shakes her head. “Would you rather…be a millionaire and then hit rock bottom OR live your entire life with just enough money to get by?”
Something tells me I already know the answer to this one, but it was the best question in the bunch, since 3 of them were about death. Not the topic to get into at this time. “I’d say the second one, because I think I’d be miserable if I was a millionaire and lost it all. I’ve already had to live my entire life with just enough to get by and it’s been tolerable. So I don’t have the fanciest clothes or furniture or house. At least I’m healthy and somewhat mentally stable. Emotionally, I need some work but it is what it is.” My heart breaks for her and all the struggles she faced. “Okay, my turn.” She chooses a card and bursts out laughing. Oh hell.
“Would you rather…be the limousine driver for a movie star OR the bus driver for a rock band?”
That’s easy…”Bus driver all the way. I wanna rock out with a band. Though driving a limo around would be badass too.”
“Yeah, I think I’d choose the bus driver one too.”
The stewardess gets on and announces our departure. I glance at Maddy who’s gone still. I divert her attention back to me. “Hey, it’s my turn. Maddy, look at me.” I pull a card out and look through them. I got my question ready. Holy crap, who came up with this game? “Okay, I’m ready. Maddy, look at me. Pay attention…would you rather…For a full day, be stuck in a full elevator OR be locked inside your car on a deserted road?”
She ponders both scenarios. Personally, I’d go with the elevator one but that’s just me. “I’d say locked inside my car because at least I’d have my music to keep me occupied. Not to mention, I don’t like elevators to begin with and being stuck in one with a bunch of strangers all day is hardly appealing to me.” She grips her arm rest, frantically. “We’re moving. Holy shit.” I take her right hand in mine, “Breathe, it’ll be fine. I’m here. Keep talking or sing to yourself.” She glances out the window as the plane slowly takes off down the runway. “Tell me something, talk…”
“I need Xanax.” She pinches her eyes shut, her palm is sweaty but I keep a firm grip on it.
“You’re doing great, baby. Tell me your first crush.”
“Andrew Harris, he was a good kisser but his teeth were crooked and yellow.” She smiles, “but he was really sweet and had the most amazing blue eyes I’d ever seen.” I watch as the plane takes off in the air, my stomach in my throat but I focus on keeping Maddy calm. I’ve always loved the rush I get from flying. “Babe?” Her eyes are still closed and her grip loosens.
“Yes?”
“Who’s your celebrity crush?”
“Gisele Bundchen or Kate Moss. I also like Cameron Diaz.”
“Why did Gisele and Leo split up?”
“Babe, look out the window.” She shakes her head. “Come on, it’s awesome. Look.” She shifts in her seat and leans forward.
“Wow, we’re really high. We’re like up in the clouds.” A small smile appears as she takes in the sight of us in the air. “Noah, this is incredible.” Her eyes gaze around in amazement. I bring her hand up to my mouth and kiss it, proudly. “I know I ‘m so lame acting like a kid. But this is a sight to see.”
“That doesn’t make you lame, I find your excitement endearing.” I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her in close. “You’re totally sexy right now.”
She leans into me, “There’s a bathroom you know.” And she wiggles her eyebrows making me laugh.
“We’re not in New York yet, baby. Sorry.”
“You suck.” She pouts her bottom lip. “Um, I might do that. And wouldn’t you like to know.” I retort, receiving a glare-pout. “Okay, let’s do one more question.” I shuffle through the cards.
“Hey it’s my turn.”
“Nope, you can go after me. I have a good one.” I look at her, smirking, “Would you rather…take off all your clothes, right now for twenty minutes, OR not take them off for two weeks?”
“Oh my god, that’s ridiculous. I’d say if we weren’t on a plane with a bunch of strangers, I’d take them off now. But…oh hell for two weeks they’d smell. Shit, Noah…you’re cruel.” I am cruel and I’m enjoying watching her squirm. “Okay, first one, fuck it.” I smile at the image of her taking her clothes off right here. “Get that smirk off your face. We’re not in New York, remember?”
“Why’d you have to ruin the picture I just painted?”
“Would you rather…wake up after sleeping walking to find yourself standing in the middle of a freeway OR on a window ledge forty stories up?” Sweet Jesus, they would both suck and possibly kill you.
“Uh, either one is suicide. But I’ll say the freeway. It doesn’t say busy freeway, so maybe you’d have a chance of getting the fuck out of there. But on a ledge that high up, one little slip and you’re fucked. I sure hope that doesn’t happen in real life. I know sleepwalking is a serious disease, though.”
“Yep, I’d be scared shitless. This is awesome.” She points outside.
“Are you thirsty? They should be bringing us drinks soon.”
“Coffee would be great. I feel myself slipping away, quickly.” I gaze down the aisle and see the drinks being passed out toward the front. I don’t know why I even bother asking if she’s thirsty. She’s the biggest coffee fiend I’ve ever met, besides her roommate. I suppose there are worse addictions though. “Noah?” Her eyes are closed and her voice is groggy.
“Yeah, babe?”
“Thank you for taking me to New York.” She lays her legs up on my knees. I give her my jacket to use as a pillow against the window.
“I’m glad I asked you to come.” I kiss the top of her head and hear her sigh. My intentions were uncertain at the time. I knew I liked her and I guess that’s why I acted on impulse. I felt she needed to have something good in her life, happy memories, even if we never started dating. I was happy to be her friend. Well that’s a lie, but I would’ve been, I would’ve made myself be, if just to see her smile. Sitting here now with her against me, it makes all the uncertainties worth it. I grab her hand resting in her lap and hold it up to my chest. When I look back at her, she’s sound asleep. “Sweet dreams, baby.” I lean back in m
y seat and the rest of the ride is a blur.
Chapter 49
Maddy
Flying is not as terrifying as I’d believed it to be. In fact, it’s pretty damn awesome. I got so worked up about nothing, I felt stupid for being such a baby. But if it wasn’t for Noah and his distractions, I wouldn’t have been able to make it through the way I did. He’s been helping me the entire time and I’m so grateful for it. I even enjoyed the trip. And then having very little sleep caught up to me and I passed out. I’d still be passed out if it wasn’t for the stewardess announcing our arrival at the airport.
“We’re in New York. Holy shit, I’m so ready to see everything.” I blurt out.
“Well good morning sunshine. How’d you sleep?” I glance around as the passengers watch out their windows, so I do too.
“Like a rock.” It’s cloudy out, but it doesn’t look like it’s snowed lately. I hope it does while we’re here. Not that I haven’t seen enough snow.
I watch as the plane attaches to the terminal. This airport is huge in comparison to the one we left. Then again, it’s New York where everything is bigger. “Is pizza here really as good as everyone says it is?”
“Yes, it is. I think so, anyway.” I notice Noah’s body language, stiff and trembling, like he’s nervous. I touch his arm to get his attention. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
“I’m fine.” But I can tell he’s not. It dawns on me that he may be nervous about being home again. It’s been 6 months, so I guess the memories of his past might be a bit too much for him all at once. It could be the fact that he’s going to see his mother…or the biggest issue could be that he’ll more than likely run into his dad. As much as I don’t want to see him, chances are I won’t have a choice. But it’s something I can deal with. If he says anything to me, I’ll ignore him, no big deal. My main goal is to support Noah.
Without a word, I take his hand in mine and hold it in my lap. “It’s going to be fine. We’re gonna have the best trip ever.” I smile, wait for his smile in return and kiss the back of his hand. “You’re really something, you know that?” He whispers. I watch people around us stand up and start toward the front. “Time to go.”
