Thaumatology 05 - Disturbia

by Teasdale, Niall

  ‘Do we get overtime?’ Lily asked as she turned the car’s lights on.

  Michael, sat beside her in the front of the car since he was navigating, said, ‘I’m not even getting paid.’

  ‘We’ll be sure to provide you with proper recompense tonight,’ Lily replied.

  ‘Huh?’

  ‘You haven’t noticed? If Ceri doesn’t get laid tonight she’s going to go funny.’ On the back seat, feeling tired, irritable, horny, and sick, all Ceri could do was groan in response. ‘You’d be the same if you hadn’t just buried your father,’ Lily added.

  ‘Oh,’ Michael said. ‘Actually, when we were in the hot tub this morning I was feeling a bit, uh…’

  He was interrupted by another groan, a frustrated one, from the back seat. Lily nodded. ‘The stress level dropped, your Dad had a good, kind of upbeat send-off, and you were in a relaxed situation. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. You’re just a bit addicted to my feeding.’ She peered out at the gathering gloom. ‘Do we know where we’re going?’

  ‘It’s been years since I was out this way,’ Michael said, ‘and the farmhouse they’re supposed to be using isn’t on this navigation thing. There’s probably still a pub in the town centre, we can ask there.’

  There was, and Ceri was too relieved to be out of the car to be bothered by the sudden drop in conversation noise as the three strangers walked in. Still, the plump woman with the red cheeks behind the bar smiled as Michael stepped up to the bar, which was a good sign.

  ‘Well, new faces,’ she said. ‘What can I get you?’

  ‘Uh, we’re looking for Llan Farm,’ Michael said and suddenly it was as if someone had stuck something putrid under the publican’s nose.

  ‘Oh, you’re with that lot.’ All the humour had drained from her voice. ‘Did you come in along Wick Road?’

  ‘Yes,’ Lily said, smiling brightly despite the hostility.

  The woman looked at the half-succubus, with her large chest hidden under a tight jersey-dress, and her nose wrinkled even more. ‘You missed it. Go back the way you came.’

  ‘I don’t suppose you could be a little more specific?’ Michael asked. He was looking uncomfortable, distinctly uncomfortable.

  She looked him up and down. Ceri would have to admit that Michael would not have made a bad porn star from the looks department. He was tall, muscled, attractive, and young. ‘No,’ the publican said, ‘I couldn’t.’

  Ceri growled and moved forward, slapping her hand onto the counter. When she lifted it, the publican was left looking at Ceri’s warrant card. ‘We’re not with the production company,’ Ceri growled. ‘We need to talk to them. Now tell us where the widder damned farm is.’

  The rosy cheeks flared brighter, but the woman’s eyes lit up as she took in the card. ‘You’re police? Well why didn’t you say so? Go back the way you came about a mile. You’ll see a track off the road on your left. Take that and go to the end. The farm’s been out of use for years. They rent it out to rich English folk. You can’t see it from the road because of the trees, but it’s there.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Ceri snapped, grabbing up her card and turning for the door.

  ‘They think we’re going out there to arrest them or something,’ Lily commented as they climbed into the car.

  ‘I could care less,’ Ceri said. ‘This car smells like my Aunt Branwen’s socks. Get me to the farm so I can throw up and get it over with.’

  ‘Mad Aunt Branwen?’ Lily asked. ‘The one who thinks you’re a sheep?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  ‘I’ll put my foot down then.’

  Putting her foot down helped, right up until she turned off the main road and onto what could only be described as a goat track. ‘Holy crap!’ Ceri yelped from the back seat. ‘Next time we demand a bloody four-wheel drive!’

  ‘I prefer walking,’ Michael said as he gripped the door handle and his seat.

  ‘There,’ Lily said, waving a hand toward something in front of them and making Ceri wince as the car jerked to the left on a pothole. ‘There’s some lights showing through the trees.’

  ‘God I hope that’s the farm,’ Ceri groaned.

  It was. There was a barn, some sort of stable or cattle pen, and a house. The house itself was moderately large; two floors of stone-built cottage built in an ‘L’ shape with enough windows to suggest it had a fair number of rooms. There were lights on in several windows and none of them masked behind curtains. There were also lights in the stable block, but Lily pulled up in front of the house among a group of other cars and a couple of vans.

  Ceri got out and stood in the courtyard with her hands on her knees. Breathing was her main concern and she concentrating on it very hard for a while. ‘What’s our approach?’ Lily asked, giving her time to recover.

  ‘Go in, ask questions,’ Ceri replied. ‘I don’t want to make this complicated. I’ll question, you watch their reactions and desires, break in with questions if you need to. We’ll do it informally until we find anything interesting. None of them are actually suspects.’ She straightened up. ‘All right, let’s do this.’

  Knocking on the farmhouse door produced no results and there was no bell. Ceri got bored after a couple of attempts and just tried the door. She glanced at Lily and rolled her eyes when it opened. ‘Security conscious, aren’t they?’ Lily gave a shrug and Ceri tentatively pushed the door open further and moved in. ‘Anyone about?’ she called out.

  There was no answer. The room was a kitchen and, while the lights were on, there was no one there. There were dishes waiting to be washed in the sink and four mugs on the large, oak table in the middle. ‘Twill would have a fit,’ Lily commented, which got a giggle out of Ceri. ‘There’s two doors.’ There were, indeed, two doors heading in opposite directions.

  ‘You and Michael take the right, I’ll take the left?’ Ceri suggested.

  ‘C’mon, you gorgeous hunk o’ werewolf bodyguard,’ Lily said, slapping Michael on the shoulder, ‘let’s go find some people.’ Michael blinked and gave Ceri a worried look before following Lily. Grinning, Ceri headed for the other door.

  The place was nice enough, she had to admit. Lots of panelled, oak doors, tasteful “Welsh country” decoration. She winced at the display of love spoons mounted in the hallway beyond the door; far too kitsch, but they were nicely carved. Moving down the hall she could hear nothing from the rooms beyond the inner doors and the only lights were coming from under the door at the end and one near it to the left. She was approaching that one when it opened and a man stepped out.

  At least six foot tall, his black skin glistened with drops of water from, Ceri guessed, a shower. He had no hair, a solid jaw under a handsome face with deep brown eyes, broad shoulders and a barrel chest which dropped smoothly into a narrow waist. His thighs were thick and heavily muscled, and quite visible between them, since he was naked, was a penis which looked huge even when limp. He looked her up and down without embarrassment or surprise. ‘Don’t suppose you know where the towels are?’ He had a deep, resonant voice to go with the chest.

  ‘I just got here,’ Ceri replied.

  ‘Huh, you too? I didn’t know Tawni had called anyone else in.’ His brow creased slightly. ‘Though they did say the fluffer had gone missing. You his replacement?’ He nodded without waiting for an answer. ‘Good, I prefer a girl doing it. Doesn’t seem right with a guy.’

  Before Ceri could say anything he had turned and pushed the other door open. Beyond it, and around his large form, she could see glimpses of a lounge with a big fireplace, with a fire burning in it despite the season, complete with fur rug in front of it. The big man walked in, still dripping; his behind was tight with solid muscle as well. ‘Lia, the new fluffer’s here. Where are the towels?’

  ‘Cupboard opposite the bathroom,’ said someone inside the room. The accent sounded something like German which surprised Ceri.

  The man turned, looked down at Ceri, and stepped back to allow her into the room so he could pass her. Ceri spott
ed the source of the female voice, a tall, blonde woman sitting on a fabric-covered, wing-back chair. She had a towel wrapped around her chest and was carefully painting her toenails in a brilliant scarlet. Glancing up, Lia smiled at Ceri, showing a lot of very white teeth. ‘You’re the new fluffer? Hi, I’m Lia.’

  ‘Ceri Brent,’ Ceri said. ‘I have a couple of questions.’

  ‘Shoot,’ Lia replied.

  ‘What’s a “fluffer,” and who’s in charge around here?’

  Lia’s face straightened. ‘You’re not the new fluffer?’

  ‘I’m here to look into Harry Walls’ death.’

  ‘You’re a cop?! Godverdomme! I’m sorry, Leo said… Kut! Could we maybe start over? I’m Lia van Daal.’

  Ceri grinned. ‘He didn’t really give me time to correct him. That’s a Dutch name isn’t it?’

  Lia nodded. ‘Ja, born in Amsterdam. Used to work the red light district, but this pays better.’ Ceri recalled that they had legalised prostitution in the Dutch territories. ‘You want to talk to Tawni, I think. Terry’s the director, but Tawni’s co-producing as well as performing.’

  ‘Tawni,’ Ceri said, ‘right. Where do I find her?’ Lily had asked about someone called Tawni when they had visited Jessie. Jessie had said she was filming in Wales…

  ‘Oh, they’re in the stables,’ Lia told her. ‘Me and Leo are just setting up for a scene in here. We’re way behind and with Monty dying…’ She shook her head. ‘It’s going to be a tough shoot.’

  From behind her, Ceri heard a deep voice rumbling. ‘Tawni never said anything about more male talent.’

  Closing her eyes, Ceri heaved a breath in. ‘Excuse me, I need to rescue my boyfriend. I’ll want to talk to you later. Uh, after your scene, probably.’ She turned without waiting for a reply and walked up behind the still naked back of Leo. ‘I’m not the fluffer and he’s not talent,’ she snapped. ‘Now get out the way so I can get past.’

  Looking around and blinking at her, Leo stood to one side. Ceri still had to turn sideways herself to get past his chest. On the other side of the huge porn actor, Michael was looking bewildered and Lily was looking amused. Ceri waved them down the hall and they preceded her into the kitchen.

  ‘It’s Tawni’s shoot,’ Lily said.

  ‘Yeah, so I discovered. They’re in the stables.’ She started for the door, waiting until they were outside and walking across the courtyard before she said, ‘What the Hell’s a “fluffer” anyway?’

  ‘Oh, they’re usually witches these days, but you get the occasional star who prefers the original idea. They make sure the actors are lubricated and they make sure the male stars are ready for takes.’

  Ceri frowned. ‘Make sure they’re ready?’

  ‘Yeah. Y’know? Hard.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘That’s why they’re usually witches these days. You remember that priapism spell Dad taught me? Absolute godsend to the porn business.’

  ‘Oh,’ Ceri said again. ‘Do I look like a fluffer?’

  ‘No of course not,’ Lily said. ‘You look like a porn star, we’ve established that.’

  ‘I do not…’

  ‘Shaven, tight arse, skin that holds a nice flush, and so vocal,’ Lily said, mimicking Jessie.

  ‘Have I missed something?’ Michael asked.

  ‘Just some undercover work,’ Lily said, giggling.

  ‘I think it’d have been undercover if she hadn’t had to go out,’ Ceri commented.

  ‘Huh,’ Lily grunted. ‘Quiet now, I think they’re filming.’ They had reached the stables and Lily cracked the nearest door an inch, peeking through and nodding before putting a finger to her lips. She slipped in and Ceri and Michael followed her as quietly as possible.

  The stable had around ten stalls lining one wall with a wide corridor facing them. There were a couple of feed bins, which looked unused. The whole place looked unused, in fact, aside from the second from last stall which was in use, but not for its original function. A cameraman was standing just outside it with a handheld video camera on a steady-rig. Ceri could see a boom microphone suspended over the stall and a man with headphones concentrating on a box hung around his neck on a leather strap. Two other people were there, one sat on a folding chair and the other standing nearby, frowning. The one on the chair, Ceri guessed, was the director, Terry; he looked arrogant enough. The other was a brown-skinned woman, and Ceri’s eyes widened when she saw her. Quietly, she slipped behind Michael as the trio approached.

  Closer, Ceri could hear moans and grunts coming from the stall. A female voice cried out, ‘Yes! Harder!’ and the moaning became louder. ‘Oh yes!’ the voice cried. Closer still and they could hear the sound of regular, rhythmic rustles of hay.

  ‘Cut!’ the director called out. The rustling sounds stopped almost instantly. ‘All right, set up for the come shot. What the Hell are these people doing on my set?’

  ‘Hey Tawni,’ Lily’s voice.

  ‘Lilith! Is that really you? By God, girl, I haven’t seen you in…’

  ‘Just over five years. You’re looking good.’

  ‘So are you. I thought you got out of the business?’

  ‘I did. This is… Michael and somewhere there’s…’

  Ceri stepped out from behind Michael and looked across at the woman called Tawni. Tawni’s eyes widened. ‘Hi Tanya,’ Ceri said, ‘long time, no see.’

  ~~~

  ‘I got into porn after I left my folks,’ Tawni said. ‘They’d found a new squat in Birmingham and I hated it. Moved out at eighteen and found my way to Manchester. Ended up with a guy who made a few amateur movies. Some producer saw one of them and I got my break.’ They had moved to one of the rooms in the farmhouse leaving Terry to finish the shooting.

  ‘You were always the confident one,’ Ceri said. She glanced at Lily. ‘Tanya used to live down the road from me, in the squats. We were friends until her family moved out in… two-thousand-three?’

  Tawni nodded. ‘I mostly go by Tawni now.’

  ‘And I go by Lily,’ Lily said. ‘Lilith holds a few bad memories.’

  ‘Oh, but you were the best!’ Tawni exclaimed. ‘You were even good at the actual acting. I mean, “Vampire Lust” was a masterpiece, “Lay with the Dragon” was practically art.’

  Lily smiled, accepting the praise. ‘And then things went wrong,’ she said. ‘I got out before I killed someone.’

  ‘Which brings us to why we’re here,’ Ceri said. ‘Harry Walls, has he done any illegal films?’

  ‘No!’ Tawni said, sounding genuinely horrified. ‘I don’t think so anyway. If I knew he had I wouldn’t have worked with him.’

  ‘To be honest,’ Lily said, ‘it doesn’t fit well. He’d have had to have been pretty hard up to do it, but then I’m surprised Suzie did it.’

  ‘Suzie Stacks?’ Tawni asked, sounding just as surprised.

  ‘She was killed last week,’ Ceri said. ‘We think it’s because she was in a hardcore snuff flick called “The Degradation of Julia.”’ Tawni showed no sign of recognition; okay, she was an actress, but Ceri was watching carefully, there wasn’t even a twitch. ‘It’s looking like the person who killed Walls killed her, and three werewolves who were in the film. On that basis we figured Walls was in it, but if he wasn’t…’

  ‘Change of MO,’ Lily said. ‘That would be bad.’

  ‘We’ll need to talk to your people,’ Ceri said. ‘I guess it can wait until morning now.’

  Tawni nodded. ‘Of course. There aren’t many of us. I tried to keep the production costs down. We’ve got make-up, a couple of guys handling the set dressing, four actors plus me, Terry the director. We had a fluffer, but he left today. Said he wouldn’t work on a movie with “the mark of death.” I haven’t managed to replace him. We’ve been doing it the hard way all day.’

  ‘I’ll need his name and address,’ Ceri said. ‘We can send someone local around to take a statement.’

  ‘How did you end up working with the police?!’ Tawni a
sked, her eyebrows rising. ‘No, actually, forget that. Who’s the hunk? I remember you being this timid little thing who wouldn’t say hello to a boy. Now you’re wandering around with this stud.’

  Michael blushed to the roots of his hair. ‘I’m Michael,’ he said. ‘Battersea pack.’

  ‘A werewolf?’ Tawni blinked and looked between Ceri and Michael uncertainly.

  ‘It’s a long story,’ Ceri said. ‘He’s my mate, Lily’s my pet.’ She lifted her right arm and showed Tawni the inside of it.

  ‘Your tattoos are gone!’

  ‘And now I can work magic. There was an accident in my thaumatology lab.’

  ‘She’s really powerful,’ Lily said. ‘I didn’t touch her for almost five years, but when she started throwing magic around… Well, I couldn’t resist her. So it’s either I’m her pet, or I’m constantly trying to dominate her.’

  Tawni’s brown eyes fixed on Ceri. ‘Oh girl, we got some catching up to do. Where are you staying?’

  ‘We were in a hotel in Cardiff,’ Ceri said, ‘but we need somewhere local.’

  ‘You can stay here,’ Tawni said emphatically. ‘Like I said, it’s a small production. There’s a couple of rooms free.’

  ‘We just need one,’ Lily said.

  Tawni’s grin was positively evil. ‘Oh Ceri girl, you have so changed since I last saw you.’

  ~~~

  The room was not large, but it had a double bed and a cupboard they could hang clothes in. ‘Not quite the hotel,’ Ceri said, ‘but it’ll save the Met some expenses and we couldn’t keep living off Carter.’

  ‘Quite right,’ Lily said. Reaching down she grasped the hem of her dress and pulled it off over her head, shaking out her hair as she tossed the woollen garment onto a chair. ‘So much better.’

  Ceri grinned at her and sat on the edge of the bed, Michael sprawling behind her. ‘What’ve you got on the ones you’ve seen?’ Ceri asked.

  ‘Tawni’s desperate that this film should succeed,’ Lily replied. Turning, she bent over at the hips and reached down to undo the ankle straps on her sandals. Ceri swallowed at the sight of her naked behind. ‘You really went to school with her?’