Altered Destiny

by Shawna Thomas

  “Do we have an agreement?”

  Nathan stared at the light flickering against the stone wall. A deal with the devil? So be it. He turned to the Svistra. “Yes. We do. But I’m not done with you yet. As soon as you’re strong enough, you and I are going to have a long talk.”

  “I look forward to it, Commander.”

  Keldar paced the confines of his tent. Blasted gods-cursed Jaden. It was his fault. The humans had caught them unprepared. He and his warriors had to run like a village of human females. How had the soldiers defeated the force he’d sent against the damned fortress so quickly?

  But he knew the answer. He’d sent only as many as it would take to appear a full-fledged attack. Even so, in the light of day, the humans wouldn’t have been fooled. He’d been overconfident. He hadn’t expected them to defeat his warriors, and by the time the Svistra returned to the camp to warn him he’d been distracted by his brother. The girl. If she wasn’t already dead…and he’d had her in his hands.

  He’d made a mistake. He could admit it. But he couldn’t afford to make another. Before now the war had been something like a game of strategy. A cat playing with a mouse. Victory was certain; he’d made sure of it. That didn’t take away this sting of humiliation.

  At least Jaden was no longer a problem. He’d been weakened and almost defeated before the humans attacked. If he hadn’t died of his wounds, the humans would have finished him off. Keldar’s anger grew hotter. They denied him the pleasure of seeing the life drain from Jaden’s eyes. It was only one more grievance against the human commander. A score he was looking forward to settling.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Jaden sank into the thin mattress. His heart pounded in his ears, and his limbs felt weightless. The effort of talking with the commander had cost him, but it had been worth it for the information he’d gained. Murmurs sounded outside the door. He caught Selia’s name a few times and then the sound of footsteps retreating. The commander cared for her. That was good. Jaden grimaced. Good for Selia, anyway.

  As he shifted to stare into the fire, his muscles screamed in protest. Jaden closed his eyes against the pain. He was in even worse shape than the commander imagined, and not just because of his injuries.

  The image of Selia sitting in the Svistra tent, frozen in position—as though he hadn’t moved out of her arms, too stunned even to be as frightened as she should have been—was imprinted in the dark behind his lids. Did she know how close he’d come to losing control? He didn’t think he’d ever hurt her, not if he could help it, but he’d admit it had been a near thing.

  She’d fed him. The idea still inspired wonder. Although she couldn’t know that voluntarily feeding another was part of the mating ritual, warmth and a yearning for something different, something more, welled up inside him until he ached with it. His eyes pricked with unshed tears. Mine. His instincts screamed to declare them joined. He wouldn’t. By the customs of his people, she belonged to him. But she wasn’t Svistra, and she couldn’t be his.

  Some things he couldn’t change, at least not in time to make a difference, but one day others like them might have a chance for something more.

  He’d spoken to Svistra who remembered the old ways. There were even a few on the council. And as long as there were people like Selia in the world, there was still a chance of peace, still a reason for peace. He wouldn’t let her gift be in vain. It was all he had left to give back.

  Jaden couldn’t remember much after his fight with Keldar. He’d known he was about to die but was doing his best to take Keldar with him. And then something, a noise, distracted him right before blackness took him. Disconnected flashes of images scuttled across his mind. Oren. And then he’d floated, with the skies above and a blurry image of Selia’s face to keep him company.

  Oren died protecting him. He would honor that sacrifice.

  He’d realized in the forest—when he heard the Svistra scouts and knew they’d been discovered—that somewhere along the way, Selia had become the most important thing in his life. He’d do anything for her. He could admit, to himself at least, that he loved the human female from the crossroads, and that loving her was both the best and the most futile thing he’d even done, or ever would.

  “Where’s Selia?” Nathan stepped into the hall. He clenched his jaw when the guards looked in trepidation at each other then back to him. Irritation warmed his blood.

  “She went outside,” one of them said. “You—um, said she wasn’t a prisoner, so we didn’t think to stop her.”

  He began to walk away then paused. “Don’t let anyone but me or Selia in or out of that room. Understand?”

  “Yes, Commander.” The guards nodded in unison.

  Nathan made his way down the winding corridor and stepped into the night. Selia leaned against the fortress to one side of the door, staring up at the stars. Shadows played across her face as a nearby torch flickered in a slight breeze. For a moment, Nathan watched her. Her eyes were dry, but sadness hung over her body. The desire to hold her, comfort her warred with the betrayal he felt at her omission.

  Nathan sighed and stepped into the cool air. It must be almost harvest time. He didn’t know what inspired the thought, but with it came the image of his father’s farm and grasses heavy with grain, the heat of the kitchen as his mother preserved vegetables from the garden, and the sweet smell of ripening fruit. An ache of melancholy for a simpler life hit him.

  She watched his approach, her body stiff presumably fearing a reprimand. He probably should tell her not to stray so far from her room. Rumors that she’d protected a Svistra had spread. The men saw Selia as a traitor.

  Now that he’d spoken to Jaden he understood a little better why Selia cared for him. To her Jaden was a person. He had a history, likes and dislikes. Nathan, however, was the commander of the king’s army and if he started viewing his enemies as individuals, he wouldn’t be able to make the decisions he needed to keep his men alive. But neither would he scorn a gift from the gods. He would get information from the Svistra.

  Selia stood before him, waiting. Nathan examined her face as the starlight lit the planes and threw the valleys into darkness. Not beautiful, but arresting. An interesting face. A face made to study over time.

  He closed his eyes briefly to break the contact. “The deal is made.”

  Her body visibly relaxed.

  “He will do as you said he would, but he added a condition.”

  Her eyes widened, reflecting even more of the starlight.

  “I am charged with your safety. Though what I can do in these godsforsaken lands is beyond me.”

  Selia opened her mouth.

  “No. I’m not sending you to Newhaven. The only way I can keep my side of the bargain and assure your friend keeps his is to keep you with me. You can give me your word you’ll stay voluntarily, or I can make you a prisoner. Your choice.”

  “I’d prefer not to be a prisoner.”

  “Then you will not be.” Nathan leaned against the fortress, mimicking Selia’s former posture.

  “Will I be allowed a weapon?”

  Nathan didn’t take his gaze away from the flickering stars. “Will you use it on my men?”

  “Only in self defense.”

  “Your word?”

  “Need you ask?”

  “I’ll have a bow, arrows and a sword brought to you as soon as the Svistra leaves.”

  “His name is Jaden.”

  “Yes, I know.”

  “He’s a—”

  “He is a Svistra, and I must do my job.” His voice rang harsh. He met her gaze. “This isn’t about one Svistra. I’m trying to protect—not just you, but thousands of innocent people. Don’t you understand? If unchecked, the Svistra would ravage the land and its people. We would be massacred. You were in their midst. Can you tell me the Svistra would be merciful?”

  A tremor shook Selia’s body.

  “This is what you weren’t telling me, isn’t it? A Svistra helped you north.”


  “Yes.”

  “I’d thought maybe you’d been raped or robbed or…I gave you the benefit of the doubt, and you lied to me.”

  “I didn’t lie.”

  He glared at her dark eyes, full of the stars.

  “Better that I’d been raped?” She didn’t quite look at him.

  Nathan opened his mouth then closed it, realizing he was about to say yes but wouldn’t have meant it. Instead he turned and grasped her upper arms and forced her to meet his gaze. “Perhaps you have found the only decent Svistra alive. I don’t know. It’s not important. What is important is if we don’t fight, many, many humans will die.” Nathan dropped his hand. “I’m sorry about Oren. He was a good man.”

  Selia dropped her gaze and when Nathan lifted her chin her eyes gleamed with unshed tears. He pulled her close, her head fitting against his shoulder, and he felt her body stiffen and then relax. He stroked her hair while she cried.

  After many minutes Selia pulled away. “I’m sorry.”

  Nathan shook his head. How could he tell her that although he’d won battles and gained the honor of kings, he would never be prouder than if he could comfort her? Would she understand if he said that for the first time in his life, he’d felt a man and not just a soldier?

  She looked up, her brown eyes full of concern. “You won’t make him go anywhere until he’s well, will you?”

  The moment shattered. “No.”

  She sighed. “He will do as he says. He’s honorable. This is difficult for him too.”

  “Of course.” Nathan couldn’t deny the stab of jealousy. He wasn’t used to thinking of Svistra as rational beings, let alone something with feelings to shelter. And he didn’t like that she did.

  “Thank you. I’d better go back now. He’s probably hungry.”

  Nathan reached out and grabbed her arm. It was the word “hungry” that had filled him with alarm. “Be careful. If you need anything, there are guards right outside the door.”

  Selia looked at him, momentary confusion clouded her eyes, and then a sad smile touched her lips as though he’d disappointed her. “Thank you, Nathan.” Then she was gone, and he was alone with the night.

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  “You have to eat.” Selia fought back her growing annoyance, now tinged with desperation. Jaden wasn’t improving as fast as she’d hoped, and she didn’t know why. Her emotions were complicated by guilt. As soon as he improved he’d have to leave, and she didn’t know how she was going to bear seeing him go. “Did talking with Nathan yesterday tire you so much?”

  “No. I simply don’t need any more food.” Jaden handed back the half-eaten bowl of porridge. He searched her eyes as if looking for something.

  Selia dropped her gaze. He was weak and somehow vulnerable. She knew—even though he didn’t complain—he was in pain.

  “Selia, if there was any other way,” Jaden began tentatively. “I need you to do something for me.”

  “What?” She sat on the edge of the bed, but he remained silent. “You told me in the forest that it wasn’t a matter of I save your life, you save mine and now we’re even,” she began. “I didn’t know what you were talking about then. I understand now. I need you to live, Jaden. Please. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and tell me what I can do to make you better!” Her voice had slowly risen with conviction.

  Jaden reached up and briefly touched her face. In the golden depths of his eyes, emotions flickered. His voice was soft and hesitant. “I need fresh game.”

  Selia blinked. She’d been half expecting a request for some strange root or even an incantation, but fresh game? Did he just not like the food? He’d eaten what they’d given him in the barn readily enough and thrived. “Fresh game?”

  “Fresh, as in still alive. A rabbit or a squirrel. Anything with fur.”

  She narrowed her eyes then understanding blossomed. He needs blood. Why hadn’t she thought of it before? But animal blood, not human? Svistra didn’t need to feed on humans. The thought swirled in her mind until she was dizzy with it. No one knew. A thousand questions flew through her mind, but one glance at Jaden’s expression warned her now was not the time to ask them. It had been a difficult enough request for him to make.

  “Alive. I understand.” Selia rose.

  Jaden reached and grabbed her hand. “Thank you.”

  She nodded, squeezed his hand and turned to the door. How in the hell was she going to catch live food when Nathan wouldn’t let her out of the compound?

  Nathan turned to see Selia striding toward him. From the determination in her step, she had something to ask. “Give me a minute,” he told his men, and met Selia halfway.

  “I need to talk to you.”

  “And good morning to you too.”

  “I’m sorry.” She smiled, but her eyes remained guarded. “It’s important.”

  Nathan frowned. That meant it had something to do with the Svistra. “Okay. Talk.”

  “I need to capture a few rabbits.”

  “Rabbits?” Maybe he was wrong. “Why?”

  “I’d rather not tell you.”

  It did have something to do with the Svistra. “I see. Looking for a slightly less bloodthirsty pet?”

  “We’ve had a problem with rabbits in the garden.” She ignored his comment. “I’d like some snares to capture them.”

  Nathan shrugged. “The men have been using them for target practice. They make good stew.”

  Selia shook her head with force. “I’d like them alive.”

  He examined Selia’s face. Whatever she needed the rabbits for was important to her. “You do realize we’re preparing for a war?”

  “Yes. Although winter is a ways off, I want to make something warm with their pelts. Your men will ruin the fur.” Her dark eyes turned liquid.

  She’s lying. But why? “Okay, we’ll make a few snares.”

  “Thank you. Can I borrow a bow and arrow?”

  “In a hurry?”

  “Can I?”

  Nathan thought if Selia had been younger she would have stamped her foot. He shrugged off his bow and unhooked the quiver of arrows at his belt. “Anything else?”

  “Yes.” Selia gave him the first genuine smile he’d seen since Oren’s death. “Thank you.”

  Selia walked to the garden after retrieving the bow, a few arrows and a piece of cloth that would work like a sack. If she knew Jaden, he’d waited to ask her until his condition was desperate. Perhaps not as desperate as it had been when she’d seen him in the tent—the image of Jaden crouching, staring at her yet not seeing her, flashed through her mind and she shuddered—but desperate enough.

  She checked the direction of the wind, nocked an arrow and settled down to wait. How had she not guessed it? She should have known what was wrong with Jaden. In the tent he was starving. She didn’t know how much blood he’d taken from her, but it couldn’t have been enough. Rabbits? The stories Jaden had told her flashed through her mind. Human and Svistra living in peace?

  The Svistra didn’t need human blood, just blood. But why didn’t he tell everyone? And why didn’t the other Svistra? She realized she’d raised her hopes when they crashed in startling realization. It wouldn’t matter. The humans still wouldn’t trust the Svistra. The Svistra would still want their lands back. Nothing would have changed.

  A movement caught her attention. She waited until she had a clear shot and let go of the string. The arrow flew true, impaling the rabbit into the ground through its hind leg. Selia hurried. She’d seen rabbits chew off their own foot when caught in a trap, and she didn’t want this one to get away. Throwing a cloth over the struggling thing to protect her skin from strong legs and vicious claws, she broke the arrow, picked up the rabbit and almost ran toward Jaden’s room.

  Before the door, the guards looked alternatively at the writhing bundle in her hands and her face. Thank the gods one of them was Deigon.

  “Open the door, please,” she asked with as much nonchalance as she could muster.

>   Deigon shrugged, reached over and let the door swing in.

  Selia nodded and stepped into the room, pushing the door closed with her foot.

  Jaden’s eyes didn’t leave the moving bundle.

  Suddenly she felt unsure. “I…I brought the rabbit.”

  “It’s bleeding.”

  “I shot it through the leg.”

  A ghost of a smile touched Jaden’s mouth. Then he met Selia’s eyes. She stepped forward to hand Jaden the covered rabbit. The creature redoubled its efforts and managed to scratch Selia’s hand badly enough to draw blood.

  Jaden took the rabbit from her, holding it by the scruff of the neck and expertly avoiding its claws. “Thank you.” His voice was solemn, his eyes guarded.

  She hesitated.

  When Jaden looked up again, he almost sounded apologetic. “Please, leave now.”

  Selia nodded and backed out of the room. “I’ll be back soon.”

  Jaden watched her until she closed the door.

  As good as his word, Nathan had set up snares in the garden. Selia pulled a few carrots and placed them as bait. One of the men promised to weave a cage of branches for the rabbits. She didn’t mention she probably wouldn’t need one. Guilt tinged her thoughts. Should she tell Nathan why she needed the rabbits? He’d granted a request that, to him, had to seem odd. He’d never guess what they were for. No one would.

  She made her way to the rotting log where she and Oren had sat not too long ago. She closed her eyes and, for a moment, enjoyed the sun on her face. The moment was brief. How many would he need? How long should I wait before returning to the room? She hadn’t left his side for more than necessary trips to the chamber pot, and the last time she’d slept for more than a few hours had been when the healer had sat with Jaden.

  She closed her eyes. He would be well now; he had to be. Then he’d go away.

  Her limbs grew heavy. She’d lost Oren. Could she adjust to life without Jaden? Did the two even compare? Somehow they did.