Love or Lust

by Megan West

  As my mind’s eye traced over Rick’s naked body once again my office phone beeped and shocked me back to reality.

  “Kayla, there’s a man coming to see you.” Kimberly, the front desk secretary said over my speakerphone. I couldn’t quite put a finger on her tone of voice, but she sounded annoyed.

  “A man?” I asked as I quickly pressed the talk button on the phone. I rolled my eyes and said a few curse words under my breath as I realize how desperate I sounded with that question. Obviously it wasn’t odd or out of the ordinary for a man to see me at work, but since I had men on the mind my first thought wasn’t work related at all.

  “Yes a man.” Kimberly confirmed as I finished cursing myself for the desperation in my voice. “I tried stopping him and telling him he had to wait, but he didn’t listen and just walked right past the desk.”

  “Okay…” I wasn’t sure what else to say.

  “He had on a leather jacket and boots.”

  My heart instantly dropped. Rick. How could he know where I work? I leaned over my desk to get a better look out my office window and toward the front desk. I couldn’t see him yet.

  “Kayla, he’s tracking in dirt everywhere.” Kimberly said over the phone with an annoyed sigh. “Do you know him?”

  My heart lurched the moment I saw him. It was Rick.

  “Thanks Kimberly.” I said, ignoring her question and promptly muting the speaker.

  Quickly, I scrambled from behind my desk and ran towards the window. I closed my office blinds as fast as I could and leaned against the door. My breath stilled and my palms felt sweaty. I wasn’t ready to see him. Not to mention, him walking into my work looking as unprofessional as he did probably wasn’t the best image for me.

  I peeked out the blinds just in time to see him talking to Jonathan of all people. Jonathan looked at him confused before pointing towards my office. Rick gave him a smile and a nod before heading my way. Even though he looked completely out of place in such a professional atmosphere he was still as dead sexy as ever. He had his leather jacket on, ripped jeans, and motorcycle boots that left a trail of dirty footprints all along the hallway. Either he didn’t seem to care about the mess he was making or he didn’t seem to notice.

  “Fuck…” I muttered under my breath as I shot my hand away for the blinds and readied myself to talk to him. How could he have possibly figured out where I work? Was he some kind of creepy stalker?

  I sucked in a nervous breath. Great, now I had some unkempt man that tracks dirt into my office, who will probably show up there every day. That night was supposed to be my wild and crazy night out. Even though I couldn’t get my mind off of him, it was supposed to be a one-time thing. Now I felt like my two worlds were colliding—my fun night out with Vivian and my professional career.

  A loud thud banged against my office door and I instantly opened it without another moment’s hesitation. I wanted him inside my office and out of sight as soon as possible. The moment the door swung open Rick looked at me with a wide smile.

  “Hey sexy.”

  “Get in here.” I said, grabbing him by the arm and tugging him inside.

  “Who is that? He’s making a mess.” I heard one of my coworkers say as I shut the door behind us.

  Rick looked at me with a confused expression written across his face. “What’s the matter with you?”

  “You can’t come up here like this.” I said, practically scolding him.

  “Like what?”

  I looked him up and down and gave a motion with my hands toward his outfit. He looked down at himself then back up at me, unable to figure out what I was suggesting.

  “This is a professional atmosphere at my job. My career. And your tracking dirt everywhere.”

  “Sorry…” He muttered as he tried to make sense of my anger.

  “How did you find where I worked anyway?”

  He handed me a wrinkled piece of paper with a number scrawled across it.

  “I called the number you gave me. The woman at the front desk answered it has O.P. Advertising Firm. I wanted to see you again, so I looked the place up online and here I am.” He said, holding out his arms like he had just performed some kind of magic trick.

  I sucked in a deep breath the moment he said he wanted to see me again. Clearly I had some kind of effect on him, just like he had an effect on me. It felt good, but I still wanted him out of the office as soon as possible. I walked back towards the window to peek out the blinds. Jonathan was talking to Samantha and pointing to the dirt footprints and then towards my door.

  “You have to go.” I said as I turned around and tried to push him toward my door.

  “Not without a date.” He said standing still. He wouldn’t move. It was like pushing up against a brick wall.

  “A date?”

  “Yes a date. Don’t act like the other night wasn’t something special to you.” He said with a smirk as he grabbed me around the waist and pulled me closer. The moment I smelt his manly scent my knees wobbled. All the sexy memories from the other night came crashing over my body in one giant wave.

  “It was, but you have to go.” I said, trying my best to tear away from his grip. His eyes were a piercing stare as he held on tight, refusing to let go until I gave in. “Fine, one date.”

  Rick let go of me, grabbed a pen and paper off my desk, and wrote his number down. He handed it to me with his typical cocky smirk.

  “Text me your address.” He said. His eyes squinted as if he were studying my every expression. “You’re not going to leave me hanging are you?”

  I let out a short giggle. “No, of course not.”

  “After all, I do know where you work.” He laughed.

  “Speaking of work, I need to get back to it.” I said, pushing back toward the door.

  “Oh, you should wear jeans.” He said as he looked me up and down, “a skirt won’t be comfortable on a motorcycle.” He said with a wink before walking out the door.

  I peeked over his shoulder out into the office to see Jennifer and a few others gawking in our direction.

  “Bitch.” I said under my breath.

  “What’s that?” Rick turned around.

  “Nothing, see you later.” I gave him a quick smile before shutting the door behind him. I opened my office blinds just in time to see everyone’s eyes glued to Rick as he walked out. His boots fell with a thud against the floor as he walked out as confident as ever.

  There was a meager knock at my door. I opened it to see Jonathan standing there, eyes cast down to the ground.

  “Who was that?” He asked, barely able to make eye contact with me.

  “It was nobody, just a friend of a friend.” I said, trying my best to brush it off. I grit my teeth and cursed myself inside my head. I knew it was wrong to try and hide Rick from everybody else. But he didn’t belong there and right then I was starting to think I didn’t belong there either.

  That was when the true dilemma washed over me. I felt trapped between two ‘different selves’. On one side of me I wanted to go out and be crazy, live free, and be wild. That was the side of me that wouldn’t judge guys like Rick. The other side of me felt like I needed to conform to office politics and not associate with people like Rick. If I wanted to get ahead in the company, I couldn’t have strangers walking in looking like him and leaving dirt footprints across the office carpet.

  I let out a heavy sigh as I watched Kimberly sweep up some of the stray clumps of dirt. The office was too much of a sterile and boring place anyway. Sometimes things need a little dirt to add character.

  I was too sterile and boring. I was a cookie cut out the perfect businesswoman. I always dressed right and did the right things. Everything about me was predictable. An undeniable part of me started to bubble to the surface that wanted to dress differently and do all the wrong things.

  I needed a little dirt in my life. I needed character.

  I needed Rick.

  But that wasn’t me, if I wanted to get the Vice Pres
ident position I would have to stay as perfect as I had always had been.

  Chirp Chirp.

  I grabbed my phone off the desk. My eyes instantly rolled as I saw my daily motivational text from my mother.

  What you are looking for is not out there…it’s in you.

  Chapter 6

  “You…want to come upstairs?” I asked as I hopped off of the motorcycle.

  Our date had gone well. Rick was completely different from other men and the whole night I could tell he was trying to impress me. He was chivalrous and had great manners. He was also clumsy, but I could tell he was trying to impress me; even though we went to some small burger joint rather than a fancy restaurant like Jonathan took me to. That was what was different about Rick.

  Before our date I hadn’t put a finger on it. But after spending a night with him I figured it out. He didn’t pay much attention to image or how he came across, but he paid attention to me. And that was something I wasn’t used to.

  “Of course I want to come up stairs.” He smiled and hopped off the bike. He walked over to the parking meter and put a few quarters in it before following me up to the door.

  As much as I liked him, I couldn’t see myself staying with him. And I definitely couldn’t see myself introducing him to my mother. He wasn’t what she would have approved of. She expected me to find a clean cut man with a professional career—a doctor, lawyer, or a businessman. Not a man rough around the edges like Rick. When I thought of things like that I couldn’t tell if it was how I truly felt about the situation, or if I was just trying to please my mother. I knew I was trying to please her with my career, but was I trying to please her with men too?

  I drew a deep breath in as I unlocked my apartment door, savoring the scent of sandalwood and dead sexy man coming from behind me. As soon as we walked in and shut the door he pinned me to the wall with a rough kiss. I melted against him the moment I felt his strong grip on my hips, pulling me closer to him. He nibbled at my lip before brushing my head aside and sinking his teeth into my neck. The tiny bit of pain sent tingles up the back of my neck and my knees weakened.

  “I’ve been waiting too long for this.” He whispered into my ear as he pushed his hips against me. My heart thundered inside my chest the moment I felt his hard bulge press against my hip.

  “Let’s go to the bedroom.” I panted against his mouth as I ran my hand across his hardness. With that he leaned away from the wall and allowed me to lead the way. As I walked down the hallway I grabbed the hem of my blouse and practically threw it off over my head. His leather jacket and shirt were tossed on the floor behind us as we walked toward the bedroom. I couldn’t help but sneak a glance over my shoulder at his perfectly sculpted chest and abs. He really knew how to take care of himself.

  As soon as we walked into the bedroom Rick threw me onto the bed. I let out a playful giggle as I bounced on the mattress. I gave him a wink as I started to unbutton my jeans. A heavy pant escaped my lips the moment I saw his thick cock come into view as he tossed his jeans and boxers onto the floor.

  “You’re taking too long.” He said as I struggled to get my skin tight jeans down my legs. He grabbed them and forcefully tugged them down my legs. As soon as I was naked he spread my legs apart and leaned between my thighs with a devilish smile.

  I shimmied to the edge of the bed as Rick fell to his knees. Heat and lust swelled up inside me as he leaned down with kisses on the inside of my thighs. His rough stubble rubbing against my soft skin, making my back arch off the bed. With each wet to plant of his lips my heart thundered faster, my fingers gripping the blankets.

  I leaned back as his tongue explored me. He slid over my smooth pussy lips. I couldn’t help myself from begging for more. He let his tongue slide down over my opening, tasting my wetness, feeling me responding to him with the rocking of my hips. Then slowly, he slid his tongue inside my wet folds.

  I laid back with a heavy sigh, the warm soft bed underneath me as Rick buried his tongue inside. He traced it along my clit softly, tasting every drop of me as though it were the first time he had ever tasted anything so sweet.

  My eyes clenched shut as I felt the warmth of his fingers holding my thighs apart. He licked me hungrily now and I knew that the hardness of his cock had to be unbearable as he made sure I was ready for him.

  “Fuck me…” the words came out as a mere whisper, but he heard me and stopped just long enough to respond.

  “No, first you come for me. I want to taste you.”

  His words were enough to make me tighten and a tremor ran through my body as his tongue slid back down over me. Curling and twisting around my sensitive clit. Carefully and rhythmically he teased me with his tongue until I teetered on the edge.

  The sound that came out of my mouth was no more than a guttural moan as I threw back my head. My thighs tightened around his face as hot pleasure arched my back. Waves of weightlessness flowed through my limbs and curled my toes.

  Rick continued teasing me, tasting me as my body trembled and my pussy pulled tightly before releasing me in a shudder of rippling pleasure. “Mmmm” he hummed against my pussy as he sucked gently, playfully dipping his tongue inside.

  “You taste amazing.” He was breathless now as he sucked me one last time before pulling away.

  Rick stood up and I opened my eyes only to see him standing between my legs with his thick cock throbbing.

  “Do you still want me to fuck you?” He teased my opening with the tip of his cock. Slowly, he slipped his head inside.

  “Hurry up already!” I yelped as I rolled my hips toward him, forcing him inside a little more. He teased me by slowly easing his head in and out as he practically devoured my naked and needy body with his eyes.

  He ran the head of his cock up and down my wet lips a few times. I tried to lift my hips up in search of more friction, but he slammed them back down onto the bed. That was when I finally felt him slide his entire length inside me in one swift motion. My mouth locked open and my eyes fluttered closed as I felt the thick width of his shaft stretch me full.

  A breathy moan escaped my chest as I arched my back, enjoying the pleasure of finally being filled with him after wanting it so badly for so long. I tried to lift my hips like I always did, but he wasn’t allowing it. He started pumping in and out of me slowly at first but he must have been worked up too because it didn’t take long for him to pick up the pace. The quiet bedroom filled with the rhythmic slapping of our skin as he caught one of my bouncing breasts in his hand. He leaned down and gave my nipple a playful bite, forcing a quivering moan out of me.

  Everything about him made me a trembling mess—his scent, his body, the way he looked at me like a hungry animal. He was everything I wanted in a man and the last person people would expect me to be with. I knew whatever this was we had, it wasn’t going to last. Even though he felt so right, he was wrong for me.

  He slid his arm under my lower back and lifted my hips so he could penetrate me deeper and harder. It wasn’t long before he was thrusting in and out hard and fast, forcing breathy moans to skip out of me with each slap of his hips. He reached down and squeezed one of my erect nipples just before moving down so he could rub my clit.

  I sucked a deep breath in as he gripped my hips and pulled me toward him, propping my ass on his thighs so that I was angled a bit upward and he could burry himself deeper inside me. I moaned even louder. He started thrusting in and out faster, making sure each stroke was deep and long. Without warning he pulled out, grabbed my leg, and turned me over until I was on my stomach, each of my legs on either side of him.

  I clawed at the bed as he tugged me closer and nestled his cock against my opening. He eased inside, forcing my jaw to lock open in a silent scream. He started to thrust as deep and fast as before. This time it set off a chain of loud cries, purely from pleasure, as he hit the perfect spot inside me with every single thrust. He definitely knew what he was doing and I found the silent way he took control extremely hot.

  R
ick started thrusting harder, never failing to go as deep as possible and making sure he hit my sensitive spot each time. My body tensed up and I squeezed my legs against him, muscles clenching around his manhood as intense feelings coursed through my veins. My teeth sank into my lower lip as tingles cascaded down the back of my legs and my fingers clenched at the covers.

  I was practically a limp ragdoll as Rick turned me back over and started thrusting in and out of me, face to face. He gripped my waist tightly and pounded into me, the headboard smacked loudly against the wall with each punishing thrust of his hips.

  I moaned again, louder and louder, until my body tensed up as the orgasm slammed into me. Waves of pleasure rippled through my body, jerking my legs and curling my toes. I stopped making noise and my mouth hung open as my body practically vibrated with intense pleasure. It wasn’t long before his thrusting stilled and I felt the pumping of his cock inside me, filling me deep.

  We both fell onto our backs and stared up at the ceiling, panting for breath as our hearts began to slow. I turned my head to the side and admired his bright green eyes and strong jaw covered with five o’clock shadow.

  Even though he was everything I wanted in a man—fun, adventurous, and dead sexy—he wasn’t right for me. I was already too deep in my professional life and I needed a clean cut professional man to go along with that life.

  At least that’s what I told myself. That’s what I thought I believed.

  Now I had to tell him the truth.

  This wasn’t going to work out.

  Chapter 7

  “I don’t think this is going to work out between us.” I said as soon as we got dressed.

  Rick stared at me with a blank expression before finally speaking. “What won’t work out between us?”

  “This.” I said, motioning at both of us. “This whole thing…I.” My eyes cast to the ground, I could barely look at him as he sat at the edge of my bed. “It won’t work.”

  He looked somewhat shocked. Everything had been going so well and I’m sure my sudden doubts were coming out of left field for him.