A Man of Honor (A Young Adult Paranormal Romance) (The Honor Trilogy)

by Grider, J. P.

“No. We wouldn’t even know what to do with her. We just worked for the guy…got him what he wanted. We’re not empaths or anything like that. Asa just paid us a ton of money to do his dirty work. As you just saw, he’s not the largest of men.”

  “So…”

  “So…” the larger man interrupts. “If you’d like help disposing of the bodies, we can help. We’ll take them to where Asa had us dump all his bodies.”

  “Where’s that?”

  “Now we won’t be giving that away, will we? No. Then you can implicate us. Though we can implicate you, too, for murdering Asa. But we never liked the guy, so just help us drag them out.”

  The other large man speaks up. “I’ll go get the bags, but we’ll have to watch. We’re lucky no one was around today. We should probably stick around ‘til dark before carrying them out.”

  Yeah, we are lucky. All the time thinking about saving Honor, I forgot that it was daylight. “Okay, let’s drag them into some bushes until we can get them out,” I offer.

  “How ‘bout all this blood?” Tamlin asks out of the blue.

  “He’ll get stuff for that with the bags,” the larger man says.

  “Um…Tam…” I say slowly, forgetting who brought Honor here in the first place. “Why the hell didn’t you take Honor to your house like I’d asked?”

  “Storm.” Honor puts her hand on my arm. “I forced her to take me. There was no way I could stay away. I wasn’t going to sit back and drink lemonade while you all were fighting to keep me safe.”

  “And you listened to her?” I’m still talking to Tamlin.

  “Uh, well,…”

  “Stop, Storm,” Honor reprimands. “She could have taken me to her house, but I just would’ve jogged home and got my car. Stop protecting me like that. I mean, I appreciate it, and I certainly couldn’t fight my way out of the Gaffer’s hold, but…”

  “But what, Honor? If you’d listened to me in the first place, you wouldn’t have had to fight your way out of his hold now, would you?”

  Honor sighs, and I inwardly chastise myself for getting angry.

  “Okay, can we just stop this now?” Elijah says, not really asking us to stop, but demanding that we do.

  “Fine. It’s dropped,” I say. Softening my resolve, I hug Honor. “Now that you’re safe, why don’t you and Tam go home? We don’t need you to help clean up. Go put some normalcy back in your life, and be glad it’s done.”

  Honor and Tamlin look at each other and shrug.

  “What do you think, Honor?” Tamlin asks. “You want to get going? I need to have me a big piece of chocolate cake.”

  Honor chuckles. “You have cake?”

  “Of course. Then you can help me dye my hair. I’m thinking of trying green this time.”

  “Green?” Honor and Elijah cry in horror.

  “Yeah, like a mint green,” Tamlin says.

  “Why don’t you two go,” I suggest again.

  “C’mon, Hon,” Tamlin grabs her by the arm.

  “Yeah,” Honor says. “Thank you,” she looks at me, “for getting me away from that man…and…killing him.”

  Hugging her again, I kiss her on top of the head. “That was my only goal, princess – to save you from that man. Now you’re safe. It’s over.”

  Her head leans against my chest, and she tightens her arms around my waist.

  “It’s over,” she whispers, and I know exactly what she’s thinking. Now that it’s over, we need to take that break.

  “I’ll still stay with you tonight, babe. We’ll talk about it later.”

  I give her a soft kiss goodbye, Elijah and Tamlin break their embrace, and the girls walk away. The man with the bags and the clean-up material comes walking back around the lake, a backpack on his back.

  After gruelingly stuffing the dead bodies into the bags while Hunter stands guard, we drag them up the hill and behind some torn down huge tree trunk. Then we proceed to clean up the blood on the dirt with some bleach and some brushes Asa’s men had packed away.

  All the while cleaning up our fatal mess, I think about how tonight would be my last night with Honor for a while. And if she realizes that her feelings for me are only rebounded feelings of mine, then it’d be my last night with her forever.

  I silently pray that I could handle it if that were the case, but I doubt I would. A life on the run would be my fate again…if Honor doesn’t choose me.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  “Hey, princess, I’m home.” I greet Honor in her bedroom about nine at night.

  It seems that though Mahlon Dickerson by Saffin pond is not a popular place to be during after school hours, it certainly is a hopping place for the after work crowd. It is necessary to wait until all the walkers and runners leave the reservation before carrying the dead guys out.

  “Hey, Storm,” Honor says with sleepy eyes.

  “Were you sleeping already?”

  She holds up the book in her hands. “No, reading, but I may have dozed off a little.” Putting her book aside and sitting up against her headboard, she pats the bed for me to sit. “How’d it go?”

  “It went. There were just all these after work exercisers getting their miles in that we had to wait until they left.”

  “Oh my god, did they see you?”

  “Well, we didn’t hide. We just…acted like we were supposed to be there. Eli and Hunter went walking up some trails while Tom and the big guys hung out talking near where we hid Asa and Moore.”

  “What about you? Where were you?”

  “I just sat on a rock nearby.”

  “You weren’t up for talking with anyone?”

  I settle myself more comfortably on Honor’s bed by sitting next to her and holding her in my arms. “Nah. Wasn’t in the mood.” All I had been able to think about was what would happen to Honor and me if she decided she wasn’t in love with me.

  “Oh,” she says with a sigh. “Storm,” she says after a long pause. “Do we have to take that break?”

  “I think we do, princess. I wouldn’t be comfortable not knowing whether you really are into me or if you’re just into me because I’m into you. Does that make any sense at all?”

  She shrugs beneath my shoulders. “I guess.”

  “Besides, you still have feelings for Ethan. I want to know for sure that you’re done with him before you and I make any commitments to each other.”

  “Yeah.” She sighs and rests her head against my chest.

  I kick off my shoes and grab the pillow beneath us. Placing it behind my head, I settle back and enjoy holding Honor for what may be our last night together.

  “I’ll still see you at school, right? And at lunch?” Her voice breaks.

  “Well, I’ve been thinking of withdrawing from school.”

  She whips her head up to look at me. “You can’t. Please don’t leave school.”

  “Baby, I finished high school like five years ago. They just have my fake school records which say I’m eighteen anyway. I can just sign myself out.”

  She leans her head back against my chest. “But I like having you there.”

  “Sweetheart, in June I’d be graduating anyway. There is no way I’m sticking around for that. Besides, I was only here to watch over you. That job is done.”

  “No,” she cries. And after a few seconds her tears seep through my shirt and onto my chest.

  Gliding my hands through her long hair, I whisper, “Don’t worry, princess, I’m not leaving Jefferson…not until I know what you want.”

  The sweet scent of Honor right beneath my nose lulls me to sleep. I’m not sure who falls asleep first, but when I wake up, the sun is rising and Honor is still in my arms.

  “Good morning, Storm.” Honor surprises me by being awake. She was lying so still in my arms.

  “Good morning, princess.”

  “Storm…I was thinking. What is everyone going to think about Mr. Moore not showing up at school?”

  “Hmm, I hadn’t thought of that. I don’t know.” N
ow that it’s on my mind, I’m worried about it. Plus, withdrawing from school will probably not be the best thing for me, especially since everyone knows how much Moore annoyed me. Not that jumping to the thought that I’d killed him because of my dislike for him would be the natural conclusion. I can’t take that chance. “You know…I think I’m going to stay in school until graduation.”

  “Why? What changed your mind?” She looks up at me with wide violet eyes.

  “I guess I’d like to see how this whole Moore thing plays out.”

  “Oh,” she says. “That’s a good idea…I still feel bad. He was a nice guy.”

  “I don’t know about that, but at least he tried to help us.”

  “Yeah…and…I’m glad I got to see my grandpa.”

  I squeeze her hard. “Yeah. That was pretty cool.”

  While Honor gets ready for school, I pack up all my things and run it to my car, feeling sad about moving out already. When I return, Honor is sitting at the counter with her mom.

  “Storm, coffee?” her mother offers.

  “Sure. Thanks, Mrs. Stevens,” I say, taking the already poured mug from her hand.

  “Honor filled me in last night about yesterday.”

  “Oh. Well…I’m happy to say, she’s safe now. No one will be out looking for her blood or that elixir anymore.”

  Mrs. S. smiles, but a frown follows. “She also told me about the three of you all needing a break from each other.”

  I just nod.

  “She said it was your idea,” Mrs. S. continues.

  “Yup,” I say with a frown.

  “I think that was very admirable, young man. It takes a real grown up to face the truth like that.” She smiles again and whispers in my ear, “I’m pulling for you.”

  I chuckle.

  “I told Mom about my vacation idea. She said she’ll talk to Dad, but she likes the idea too. She said maybe an island or something,” Honor says with half a smile.

  “Sweet.” I find it hard to be happy that she’s going away. What if she finds her feelings for me have totally disappeared? I’ll just have to deal with it.

  “Anyway,” Honor says. “We should get to school.”

  “Yeah, uh…just let me brush my teeth. Be right back.”

  “Mom really likes you,” Honor says in the car on the way to school.

  “Yeah? Well that’s good.” My heart is just too sad to get excited about it.

  “I’m nervous about going to school. How are we going to hide what we know about Mr. Moore?” When I take a side glance at Honor, she’s biting her lip.

  “Princess,” I say while rubbing her thigh. “Just act natural. It’s only suspicious to us. No one else would have any idea what to think, so c’mon…just act like normal.”

  “I’m not feeling well all of a sudden.”

  “You know what, babe. I’m gonna drive you home. I think you need the day off.”

  “But…”

  “No buts. You and your mom can plan that vacation, and you won’t have to deal with this today.”

  “Okay,” she says, and I can see the relief pass her face.

  We turn around, I take her home, and I kiss her goodbye at the front door.

  “So…I’ll see you soon, I guess,” I say, giving her a long hug after the kiss.

  “Oh. Oh. Does our break…start…now?” she asks, her hands still around my waist.

  “I think it does.”

  I kiss her forehead and look into her violet eyes. “Call me when you’ve made your decision.”

  She nods.

  “I’ll be here waiting.” My voice comes out hoarse, because I’m trying hard to hold back tears. Tears that I don’t usually shed.

  When I see a few tears drop from Honor’s eyes, my own tears come out to meet hers.

  I don’t cry.

  I hate crying.

  But here I am…crying.

  Giving Honor one last strong hug, I turn and walk away.

  Not even bothering to wipe away her tears.

  Chapter Forty

  Walking through the school halls without Honor is like walking through life without a purpose. Honor’s week-long vacation in Berry Islands is almost over and I’m dying to know where I stand.

  The only reason I attend classes is so I don’t go crazy sitting at home. That, and the fact that gossip has run ramped about Moore’s disappearance. Every high school teacher has been questioned about any personal issues they may have known about their peer. Teachers are worried and students are intrigued. Evidently, Moore had no family members. Faculty was concerned about his disappearance, so they were the ones to inform the officials. Now there’s a case, and my brothers and I can’t wait until it’s closed. Trusting that the two large men, who Tom says are named Jimmy and Jack, hold true to their word, Moore won’t be found and his case will close – unsolved.

  At lunch time, instead of going to the cafeteria and socializing, I go out to the track and take a run. Trying to outrun the pain in my chest is futile, but it beats staying still and feeling the pain. When the end of lunch bell rings, I continue running right up the hill and into school, stopping when my cell goes off.

  Not recognizing the out of state number, I let it go to voicemail and head to my next class.

  “Storm,” Tamlin says as I pass her in the hall. “What are you doing after school?”

  “Not much. Why?” I ask, not enthused at all.

  “Eli, Hunter and I are going to the diner. We want you to come. You’ve been so sulky all week.” She takes my hand and squeezes it. “You need to get out. We’re not even asking Ethan to go…since that’d probably make you sulk more.”

  I crack a smile.

  “Is that a yes?” she says with a big grin.

  “I guess.”

  “C’mere.” Tamlin gives me a big bear hug. “She’s going to choose you, you know. There’s no doubt in my mind. I think Ethan even knows it. So come on already, smile. She’ll be back in like what two days?”

  “Yeah, she’s flying in from Berry Islands today and then they’re staying in Nassau for two nights,” I explain as I unlock myself from Tamlin’s death grip.

  “See, that’s two nights. You can go two more nights, can’t you?”

  “Yeah.” I sigh.

  “Good.” She punches me in the arm and laughs. “Meet us in the lot, I’ll drive.”

  “Oh great.” I roll my eyes. “I would like to stay alive two more nights.”

  “Jack-ass,” she calls, walking away and holding her middle finger up in the air.

  Though weary from a mind that hasn’t shut down, even with sixteen hours of sleep a day, the trip to the diner is a welcome diversion. Tamlin still manages to make me laugh, and I’m envious of her relationship with Eli. They fit well – as well as I thought Honor and I had. But to watch them brings a small smile to my face. There’s no one cooler than Tam, and she deserves to be happy.

  “So, Storm,” Hunter says, a forkful of pancakes entering his mouth as he speaks. “We’re going to the drive-in tomorrow night. Wanna come?”

  “Uh, I don’t know. We’ll see.”

  “Ah, c’mon, you got anything better going on?”

  “Hunter,” Tamlin reprimands him from across the booth.

  “It’s fine,” I tell her. Turning back to Hunter, I say, “No nothing better going on, but I’ll let you know if I’m up for it.”

  “Okay. But it’s Friday night. Don’t sit home and sulk.”

  As firmly as I can, I repeat, “I’ll let you know.”

  “’kay, have it your way,” Hunter replies.

  Tamlin gives me one of those pity smiles, but I don’t take it to heart. I finish my burger then order another milk shake. Not eating this past week has made me surprisingly hungry. It’s still hard to feel happy though. I have a bad feeling. Even if she doesn’t choose Ethan, something tells me she may not be choosing me either. And I don’t know how to live with that.

  When Tam drops me back at my car, I thank her for
inviting me. If anything, it lifted my mood for a couple hours. Revving my engine, I peel out of the lot and head for home – where I’ll go right to bed so I won’t have to think too much. My nightmares will keep me from forgetting altogether, but at least I’ll get some sort of reprieve from grief.

  What a wuss I’ve turned in to. Once so callous and cocksure, I don’t even recognize myself anymore. Reclining on my bed, I grab my second pillow and hold it to my chest – the pillow filling the void where Honor should be. Attempting to recapture her scent is the last thing I remember before falling off into a restless slumber.

  **

  Clutching the sheets, I wake up drenched in sweat, my heart weighted in fear. Honor never comes back. She never returns from her trip. I sit up and clutch my chest. The pain is so intense, the nightmare so real, I can taste the foreboding rising up in my esophagus. Rubbing my sweaty palms on my blanket, I replay the nightmare in my mind.

  Honor. Saving. Healing. Dying.

  That’s all I can recall. Why can’t I remember my dream? It doesn’t make sense. In my dream, I watch her die. I watch her fall. Her hands, I remember her hands. Dammit, why can’t I remember everything?

  Dragging myself out of bed, afraid to make a movement but afraid to stay still, I pad clumsily to the bathroom, clutching my stomach. My knees betraying me, they buckle and I fall against the sink. Think, Sutherland. Think. What is my dream telling me? It has to have some meaning. I feel it in my chest. Know it in my mind.

  It’s when I’m splashing water on my face that I remember the long-distance phone call I never picked up. Running to the chair I threw my jeans on last night, I pull my phone out of the pocket and retrieve the voicemail.

  It’s Honor’s dad. He’s calling from the princess Margaret Hospital in Nassau. Oh my god, his voice is shaking. He’s muttering something, but all I hear is that something has happened to Honor. His voice goes on and on, but his words don’t register.

  When the message ends, I take a huge breath and will myself to calm down so that I can hear his voicemail over my pounding heartbeat. I press replay and hold my breath.