The Price of Fame: A Price Novel (The Price Novels Book 2)
Page 21
“Oh!”
“Where have you been?” I asked. I knew, but I wanted her to tell me.
“I went to talk to Chief Robbins.”
“You need anything from the store?” I knew she wanted to give me the details, but I wasn’t really happy about her going back this early.
“No. Don’t you want to know how it went with the chief?”
“I guess,” I said.
“Well, that’s shitty! What, you can have a life outside this damn house but I can’t? I should have figured as much.”
“You know what? You do what you want. I know what I say really doesn’t matter to you. I’m not doing this with you now.” I walked out and slammed the bedroom door behind me. Casey looked up when I walked out but didn’t say anything.
When I got home, I didn’t apologize, and neither did she. We barely spoke to each other at all. I was glad there was someone else there at all times. That way it wasn’t as awkward.
A few days later I had to go to New York for a few nights. I had to do an appearance on one of the late-night talk shows, a little promoting for the last film, and a final Calvin Klein shoot that I had been putting off for a year. I was at the photo shoot, sitting at hair and makeup and trying to not think about how worried I was, when I felt someone run a hand up my arm. I looked in the mirror to see Kinley standing beside me.
“Hey, beautiful. How is life?” Kinley asked, winking at me. I jerked my arm away from her.
“Great. Yours?”
“Good, and even better now.” She looked around as if to make sure we were alone. “Nobody tagging along with you today, I see.”
“What do you want, Kinley?” I knew I was rude, but she was the last person I felt like dealing with today.
“Nothing—I was just wondering if she was still around, that’s all.”
Three years later, and I still wasn’t in the mood for this. Kinley and I had a few drunken-night flings before I started dating Arden, and she had always acted like she was better than Arden and given me a hard time when I was still in Paris.
“Well, it was good to see you too.” I got up to walk away, and she put her hand on my chest.
“You don’t have to be so cold. You and I have to spend the whole day together.”
I looked at her, confused.
“I will be working with you in this shoot.”
Oh shit.
“Come on, Slayde, don’t be such a prude. She’s not here. It’s OK if you talk to me.”
“What does that have to do with anything? I just don’t have anything to say to you,” I said.
“Oh, I see. You had to leave your balls with her when you left.” She laughed.
I was furious. “You don’t know anything about her. So stop talking about her, and stop talking to me.” I started to walk away, but she stopped me.
“I’m not trying to piss you off. It’s just weird how you’ve changed,” she snapped.
“What do you mean? I haven’t changed.”
“Yes, you have. I haven’t seen you smile all day. That’s not you. Are marriage and kids really that bad?”
She had a point, even though I would never let her know that. I wasn’t being very friendly these days.
“It’s not that. I’m just tired.” I walked away. But that was a lie. I loved being married, and I loved my kids, but I missed Arden. It was like I didn’t know who she was anymore. She was giving me hell about anything and everything these days. That wasn’t like her at all.
I stayed away from Kinley for the rest of the day and was very glad when the shoot was over. I had a few hours to kill before I had to be at the studio, so I thought maybe I’d go take a nap. After showering at the hotel, I decided to call Arden before I lay down.
“Hey, how’s your day been?” I asked.
“Fine. Your mom and Taylor are staying here tonight, and Milly and I are going to go have drinks.”
“What?” I barked before I could stop myself.
“Slayde, I’m dying here. I have to get out for a few hours.”
“OK, I guess.”
“I don’t need your permission,” she snapped.
“I never said you did. I just, I don’t know, never mind.” I didn’t want to say anything that might start a fight. This sure wasn’t the time to mention I ran into Kinley. “Have fun and be careful.” I hung up. I didn’t know what to think about what was going on with her. I felt like I was losing her.
I decided to call Milly. I knew she would have a better idea of what was going on with Arden than I did.
“Mills, what’s going on?”
“What do you mean?” I heard her turn the music down in the background.
“You know what I mean, Milly. I’m losing her again, aren’t I?” As soon as I finished that sentence, I felt my throat tightening. I had to take a deep breath, so I wouldn’t cry.
“No, I think she’s just freaking out. I think she needs to go back to work, Slayde. I know you don’t want her to, but I really think she should.”
“I never said that. This is all not working out how I planned.”
“Slayde, you can’t plan life. Look, she loves you. She’s just not adjusting to motherhood as easily as some people do. She thinks she disappoints you and that maybe you’d be happier with someone else.”
“That’s just crazy. She’s the only one I’ll ever want.”
“I know that. I just think the two of you need to do something by yourselves. You at least need to sit down and talk about what’s bothering you,” Milly said.
“Maybe that’s a good idea. When is she going back to work?”
“I don’t know for sure. The sooner the better, though.”
“Milly, please don’t let her do anything stupid. Do you think I need to cancel the rest of this trip and come home right now?”
“No, I think you’re overreacting, and you can’t cancel The Late Show, Slayde. Don’t worry! I will feel her out tonight and text you when I can.”
“Thanks, Mills, I owe you!”
“Yeah, yeah, I’ll put it on your tab.” She laughed, and we got off the phone.
I couldn’t relax. My stomach was killing me. I wasn’t sure if I was nervous about the show, or if it was because I was worried about my marriage. I did know I had to get a grip on myself or I would be a wreck before I had to go on air. I decided to call Arden and try and smooth things over with her.
I called her three times in five minutes and finally got her to answer. “A, I know you’re busy, but can you stop and talk to me?”
It took her a few seconds to respond, and I was starting to think she was going to say no. I’m married to this woman, and she can still make me so nervous.
“Yeah, hold on a minute,” she said. I heard her talking to my mom about making bottles, and then I heard her shut the door. So I knew she was in our bedroom. “OK, what’s up?”
“I really don’t like doing this over the phone, but I’m making myself sick. I really want to cancel all of this and come home.”
She interrupted me. “You know you can’t do that. I’m listening—what’s wrong?”
“Everything! I feel like you don’t want anything to do with me anymore.” I was trying to stay calm, but it wasn’t working out so well. I was crying so hard I could barely talk.
“Slayde, calm down. Why do think something like that? I love you with all of my heart.”
“Well, you sure don’t act like it. You act like you can’t stand me. You don’t even look at me the same. You used to make me feel like I was special and important to you. Now you make me feel like I am just in your way. I know this has got to be hard for you, and I’m trying to overlook all of these little things. But I can’t do it anymore. It’s killing me.”
After a few seconds of silence, she finally said, “You’re right. I have been distant. I’m sorry if it’s made you upset. I didn’t mean for that to happen. I’m just having a hard time with all of this. Don’t you think that’s weird?”
“No, I
don’t think it’s weird. Your whole life has just changed—I get that. Nothing will ever be the same. I get that too. So, it’s scary, but it’s a good change, A. You just have to figure it all out, and I know you will. I just don’t know why you aren’t connecting with me anymore.”
She started crying, but for once I was glad. At least that meant she cared. “I don’t know, Slayde. I feel like I’m doing it all wrong, and I can’t help it. I can’t make myself feel that whole ‘in love with my kids’ feeling, OK? I mean, I love them, but I don’t even know them. They are strangers to me. I feel like they are better off with Casey or Lexi. Or hell, even Taylor. Maybe I don’t know how to be a mom because I really never had one. You are a much better mom than I am. I guess I’m really just taking it all out on you. I’m sorry.”
“Maybe it’s time for you to go back to work.”
“You think?” She sounded surprised.
“I don’t know. What are you thinking? You feel like you’re ready?” I really wasn’t ready for her to go back, but I knew she needed to do what she thought would get her back to where she was happy again. I had thought time with the babies would do it, but obviously I was wrong. Maybe it was just making her feel more imprisoned.
“I think so. Do you care?”
“It’s not my choice, baby. It’s your life. This last two years have been kind of easy because most of the time I was working in LA. It’s about to suck. I will be gone most of the time. So I can’t very well ask you to stay home. That would be wrong. You can pump, or whatever you want to do. But I also think we need to spend some time together too, just the two of us.”
“I’d like that. Where do you want to go?”
“I don’t care. Just somewhere with you. I really miss you.” I was getting choked up again. “Are we going to be OK, A? Do I need to be worried?”
“No, don’t worry. We are going to be fine. For better or worse, right?”
“You really mean that, or are you trying to make me happy?” It wasn’t a stupid question. I needed to know. And I needed her to know how serious I was about this.
“Slayde, you and I express our feelings differently, and you know that, but that doesn’t discount how I feel about you. I love you, and I know I never want to live without you again. Whether you believe me or not, I do care more about our marriage than I do my career.”
“I love you too.” I really did feel better, even if I was on the other side of the country. “I guess I’m going to get ready for tonight. Where are you and Milly going tonight?”
“I’m not sure. She made the reservations, and I forgot to ask her where. Have fun tonight. I will be watching at home. I love you. Good night.”
Chapter 21
Arden
I walked in to Chief Robbins’s office, and he came around his desk and hugged me. “I told you your spot was safe, Arden.”
I smiled at him. That really meant a lot, but I didn’t want to be given any special attention. “I know. I needed to come back. I was going crazy. It was time.”
He nodded as if he understood. “Well, I want to see some pictures.”
I pulled out my phone and showed him photos of the twins that I’d taken over the last few days.
“Oh, they are so cute. If you’re half the mom that you are a surgeon, those are two lucky babies,” he said, handing me back my phone.
I put it in my pocket, but I didn’t say anything because I wasn’t sure that I was going to be such a great mom. Would a great mom be this ready to come back to work and leave her babies? Feeling uncomfortable, I changed the subject. “Whose service am I on?”
He shrugged. “Well, you would have been with Townsend by now, and I was going to put you there. But when Greene saw you were coming in, he asked for you. He’s got a large intracranial tumor he is removing today and thought you’d be useful.”
Rat bastard. Of course he does. He knows I can’t turn that down. ”OK. Thanks.”
Greene was a total scumbag. Why did he have to be such a damn good surgeon? He hadn’t bothered me as much at the end of my pregnancy. I wasn’t sure if it was because he wasn’t attracted to whales or if it was because I had been quite bitchy. Either way, I was hoping he had requested me for my amazing surgical skills, not because he was a sicko who really thought I was interested in anything but his kick-ass brain surgeries.
“Oh, there you are,” he said when I walked out of Chief Robbins’s office. Was he stalking me? He stepped back and evaluated me. ”I knew you’d look amazing immediately. I can’t even believe you just popped out two kids.”
Perv. I stared at him like the psycho he was. Then I took a loud, cleansing breath and responded. “Well, I guess I did. What are we doing today?”
As if I’d scolded him, he stepped back. “I am removing an intracranial tumor from a twenty-seven-year-old female, and I thought you’d want to scrub in, but maybe it’s too soon.”
“Too soon for what?” I asked.
He looked as if he were thinking how to respond. I wasn’t sure what he was going to say. “OR four, thirty minutes. Don’t be late, Simms.”
“Price,” I said as he walked away. “Bastard,” I added under my breath.
Of course other interns and nurses gathered around, dying to see pictures of the babies, but I wanted to go over this patient’s chart. “Here,” I said, handing them the phone, and went to sit somewhere quiet and concentrate. I was gone about ten minutes when I came back and found some nurses drooling over a picture of Slayde and Kevin in the boat last summer, shirtless.
“Who’s his friend? He’s pretty too,” a nurse I didn’t even know well said as I snatched my phone from her grasp. I was feeling a bit violated. That was my life, and I didn’t like having to share everything with the whole world.
“Sorry. He’s taken,” I said, turning away. It probably wasn’t very smart of me to leave them with my phone, but I guess women ogling my husband wasn’t anything new.
I went and scrubbed in. I was ready before Greene. He let me stand next to him, so I could see, but barely spoke to me. He was punishing me. I knew it, and now I knew without a doubt that I would have to keep my mouth shut and just take it, or I wouldn’t get the surgeries I wanted anymore.
After he closed up, he left me there with everyone else. We usually discussed the surgery in length over a coffee afterward. He was definitely punishing me.
The only negative thing about going back while the babies were this young was still having to pump a little. Trying to dry up wasn’t something you could do as quickly as deciding you wanted to go back to work. Weaning meant making time every four to six hours to get rid of enough milk just to keep me comfortable.
I hadn’t thought about pumping at all before the surgery, and the surgery lasted four hours. When I removed my gown after leaving the ER and scrubbing out, I didn’t notice anything amiss. Not until I was headed for coffee and ran into Chief Robbins in the hall.
“Dr. Price,” he said, grabbing my arm and pulling me through his open office door.
Shit! Did Dr. Greene say something?
He smiled down at me with kind eyes. “How was your first surgery?”
“Uh, great I guess.” Is he about to move me to Townsend?
“I’m assuming it took longer than you planned.” He handed me his coat, and it hit me.
I looked down to find two huge wet spots on my scrubs. I had leaked through my bra.
“Oh shit!” I said, embarrassed.
He patted my back and said, “It’s good to have you back,” before dismissing me to find a new scrub top.
After I spent the night worrying about how Greene had treated me in the OR, I was actually hoping to be off his team the next day. When he came in in the morning, he caught me staring at the board. ”I’m still with you?” I asked cautiously.
He glared at me. “Unless you want to repair cleft palates for the next six months, which you don’t. You’re a neurosurgeon, for shit’s sake.” He exhaled. “Is that what you want, Simms? Huh?”r />
No, but I didn’t want to be sexually harassed for the rest of my internship. But I couldn’t say that. So all I said was “No.”
His cocky smile reappeared. “That’s what I thought. Come on.”
I reluctantly followed him, feeling a bit defeated. I had to suck it up and play his game for a little bit longer.
Slayde called several times while I was in surgery, and when I finally caught up with him, I knew by his voice that he was aggravated about something.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Uh, nothing serious, but do you know where your phone is?”
“Slayde, I’m on it.”
“Yeah, I know that, but have you had it the whole day?”
“What? Why?” I asked. He wasn’t making a lot of sense.
“Someone has given my number out, and I’ve been getting weird calls and texts since yesterday. My voice mail is full. I just assumed it was some dumb ass who got ahold of it somehow, but then today some pictures showed up on the internet, and they’re of the babies. At our house. If you still have your phone, it must have been Casey.”
I stopped him. “No. I handed my phone to the nurses when I got here my first day back and let them look at pictures while I read a chart.”
“That was stupid. Why would you do that?”
That pissed me off; even though I knew it was stupid, I didn’t appreciate his tone. “Well, Slayde, that’s what normal people do,” I snapped. He let out a deep breath instead of responding, and I immediately felt bad. “I’m sorry, Slayde. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
“I’m gonna change my number, so call Mom if you need me between now and then. And I don’t know what all pictures they got off your phone, but just a heads-up.”
This sucked. ”Sorry,” I said, feeling crappy.
“No big deal. Nothing we can do about it now. Love you,” he said, causing me to smile a little.
“Yeah, I love you too,” I said.
I was furious at whomever had done this to us, but knowing I’d never find out the culprit, I just locked my phone and put it away.
Milly came over to visit that evening after I got home. Slayde was out of town, so she and I would catch up. She brought sushi and wine and helped me bathe the babies before putting them to bed.