Reaching Her Heart: A Christian Romance (Callaghans & McFaddens Book 8)

by Kimberly Rae Jordan

  “You can’t live in the past, Shayna,” Tristan told her, glancing over at her and wishing he could see her face. “And they shouldn’t dwell on it either. Maybe it’s time to make peace with them.”

  Again, she took her time replying. “And if I don’t? Is that a deal breaker for you?”

  “What?” Tristan tightened his grip on the steering wheel. “No. Not at all. I just don’t want you to be weighed down by stuff like that. I only know Erin and Noella now, and they’ve always seemed to be very nice. Erin’s husband, James, helped Ethan gain custody of his sister, Sierra.”

  “I don’t want to place you in a difficult position because of my past with Erin and Noella. Maybe there will be an opportunity to talk things through at some point, but I’m just not sure what good it would do.”

  “I’m not going to force you to do anything, Shayna. Not at all. If you don’t want to deal with it, that’s your choice. It won’t impact our…uh…friendship. I’m not going to tell you that you have to deal with this or else. Never that.”

  “Thank you,” Shayna said. “I’m just not sure it will make any difference, and I’m not interested in digging that all up right now.”

  “Aside from that, you enjoyed the evening?” Tristan asked, eager to leave the subject of Lorne and the past behind.

  “I did, and I think Timothy did too. It was definitely better than what we would have had at home. Especially this year with Lisa gone. Thank you for including us.”

  Tristan hoped that her desire to be there that evening was more than just not wanting to be alone. If that was all it had been, especially after their dinner, then there really was no use in holding out hope for something more.

  Shayna fell silent, and Tristan wasn’t sure what more to say. Instead, he let the music from the radio chase the silence from the truck as his thoughts focused in on the one thing at the forefront of his mind.

  What was it about Shayna that drew him to her, and what was he going to do if she didn’t return those feelings of attraction?

  Unfortunately, he still had no answers by the time he pulled into Shayna’s driveway.

  “Why don’t you go open the door?” he said. “I’ll get Timothy out and carry him up to his room.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “I know, but there’s no sense in waking him if we don’t have to. I know I’m not the strongest man around, but Timothy isn’t the biggest eight-year-old either. Let’s just say we’re evenly matched. Plus, I managed to get him up there once before.”

  “True. I’ll go open the door.”

  Tristan went around and opened her door to help her down. As she hurried to the front door of the townhouse, Tristan pulled open the back door of the truck to find Timothy sound asleep with his head tipped back against the seat. Tristan leaned in and unsnapped the seatbelt, carefully moving it to the side before sliding one arm under Timothy’s knees and the other around his shoulders. After closing the truck door with his shoulder, Tristan made his way to where Shayna waited.

  Shayna held the door open as they approached. Tristan managed to slip off his boots without losing his balance then followed Shayna up both flights of stairs to the top floor. He noticed a few more things on this trip into Timothy’s room. Things like how, aside from a Spiderman bedspread, there was nothing décor-wise that really identified the room as belonging to a young boy.

  There was a small bookcase that had several books on the top shelf. The middle shelf held what looked like a tub of Lego. Several board games sat on the lowest shelf. When he compared that to the large cupboards in the family room and rec room that had held their toys and books when he was younger, Tristan wasn’t sure whether to feel embarrassed that they’d had so much or sorry that Timothy had so little.

  He watched as Shayna quickly pulled off Timothy’s winter wear and then the clothes he’d worn for the evening. Once she’d covered him, Tristan left the room and waited in the hallway as she turned off the light.

  They walked down the stairs, and while Tristan might have liked to linger for a talk, it was late. He could sleep in the next morning as long as he needed, but she’d have to be up whenever Timothy got up.

  At the door, Tristan put his boots back on then straightened. With his hand on the doorknob, he smiled and said, “Happy New Year.”

  Shayna returned his smile then, after what appeared to be a brief hesitation, she stepped closer to him. Her hand closed around his wrist as she leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek. “Happy New Year, Tristan.”

  Well, maybe she hadn’t been there just so she and Timothy didn’t have to spend New Year’s Eve alone after all.

  “I’ll give you a call.” He lifted his hand to touch her cheek then turned to open the door.

  “Please drive safely,” Shayna said, her words following him out into the cold night air.

  Tristan glanced back just to catch one last glimpse of her before she shut the door. He didn’t linger, and his steps were lighter as he made his way back to the truck. As he drove home, he began to think that maybe the year ahead was going to be wonderful in ways he hadn’t imagined.

  Shayna stared at the car as she tugged the collar up around her ears. Even her scarf wasn’t doing much to keep the cold at bay. She shoved her hands into the pockets of her coat—the wonderfully warm coat Tristan had given her for Christmas—and turned to face him.

  “What do you think?” he asked. “I can vouch that it runs well. Finn goes over each vehicle with a fine-tooth comb to make sure of that.”

  “Noella’s Finn.”

  Tristan nodded. “Yes. He’s married to Noella.”

  “Does she know that he’s helping me get a car?” She reached out to touch the silver reflective surface of the vehicle. If Noella didn’t want her to have the car, Shayna wouldn’t take it.

  “I would assume so. I told Finn that I wanted him to keep an eye out for a car for you. I’m sure that he shared that information with Noella. That’s what married couples usually do, isn’t it?” He paused then added, “You would know about that better than me.”

  Shayna nodded as she turned back to the car. She really wanted it. It was an SUV crossover which meant it would be safer than the vehicle she’d had before the accident. And it was within her budget. She’d taken some of the money she’d been saving up and added it to the insurance payment so that she’d have enough.

  Even so, she was pretty sure she was getting a break on the cost of the vehicle. Either Tristan or Finn were subsidizing the price. They had to be. But she wasn’t going to argue with them about it. If they were doing it out of compassion and generosity, she would accept it because this vehicle would help her keep Timothy safe.

  She hadn’t been able to get him into the new school—yet—so buying this vehicle felt like she was at least doing something to better his life. Tristan had told her she could keep his car indefinitely, but she wasn’t comfortable doing that to him.

  “Is the color okay? I know you said no red or yellow, but you didn’t say if silver would be okay.”

  Shayna smiled as she turned to Tristan. “I don’t think I can be too picky about things like colors. And even if I could, this color would be perfect.”

  “So do you want to get it then?” Tristan asked. “Or did you want to make sure that Noella knows that Finn is selling it to you?”

  She considered his question, but something told her that even though Noella might not like her, she wouldn’t begrudge her a new vehicle. No matter what they thought of her, they had all loved Lorne and, by default, Timothy.

  “I think it would be the perfect car for us.” She looked at him where he stood next to her, his breath coming in white puffs in the cold air. “Don’t you think?”

  “I do think that,” Tristan said. “Let’s go inside and talk to Finn.”

  When they approached the entrance to the building, Tristan pulled open the door and stood back to let her enter. She was immediately assaulted by the odor of oil and rubber, and the muffled
sounds of machines whirring.

  “Hey,” Finn said as he looked up from the desk he sat behind. He got to his feet and motioned to the chairs on the other side of the desk. “What did you think of the car?”

  After they were all seated, Shayna waited for Tristan to relay their conversation from outside, but instead, both men just looked at her. “Oh. Well, I think the car is perfect.”

  “Excellent!” Finn leaned back in his chair, his hands steepled in front of him. “So we just need to get the paperwork in order. Once we’ve done that, you can go to the insurance office—there’s one just down the street—and get your plates.”

  Shayna couldn’t believe how smoothly everything went. She’d thought she would have to go to her bank to get a certified check, but Finn said he was happy to take a personal one from her. Obviously he was willing to place faith in her character that his wife was not.

  After they had done all they could there, Tristan drove her to the insurance office where she got what she needed for the car, and then it was back to the garage. Finn had one of his guys put the new plates on while they waited in the office.

  “I’ll follow you back to the townhouse,” Tristan said.

  Sierra had come over with Tristan earlier and was there now with Timothy. She knew he would be excitedly waiting for her to return with the car.

  “Would you like to stay for dinner?” Shayna asked. “We could order pizza or something.”

  “Sure,” Tristan said with a smile. “We could do that.”

  When she got behind the wheel and started the vehicle, Shayna felt a rush of satisfaction. During the test drive, she’d still been nervous and not quite sure, but now that the car was officially hers, all she felt was relief and gratitude.

  All the way home, she only had to glance in her rear-view mirror to see Tristan’s truck behind her. It made her smile to see him there. Ever since New Year’s Eve three weeks earlier, they’d spent quite a bit of time together. And when they weren’t together, they were texting or talking on the phone.

  Though this relationship was completely different from what she’d experienced with Lorne, she found she enjoyed their time together. Their friendship was growing stronger, although she knew Tristan viewed what they had as something more than friends. She did too, but she suspected it wasn’t to the same extent that Tristan did.

  But there was always time.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  “Congratulations on a job well done,” Tristan said as he lifted his glass toward Timothy.

  Timothy beamed at his words and clinked his glass of chocolate milk against Tristan’s glass of soda. “I can’t believe I won.”

  “Well, you did, and you deserved it.”

  “You helped me though,” Timothy said after he’d taken a sip of his milk.

  “Not as much as you think. Once you decided on the project you wanted to do, all I did was help you figure out how to present it. You did everything else yourself.”

  As they went on to discuss Timothy’s success at the science fair, Shayna observed them. Tristan connected with Timothy on a level that Shayna never had been able to. It was a level Lorne wouldn’t have been able to connect with him on, either.

  Frowning, she pulled her thoughts from Lorne. She tried not to think of him when she was with Tristan. Too often lately, comparisons would pop up, and that wasn’t fair to either of them. She was trying hard to be present in the moment, and that moment was for the three of them to celebrate Timothy’s success.

  After Timothy had won at the science fair, they had gone out for dinner. A pancake dinner, of course. Even she and Tristan had ordered pancakes. While hers were just simple blueberry ones, Timothy’s were heaped with whipped cream and sprinkles. And then there was a plate with plenty of bacon to go around.

  It made Shayna feel slightly better about not having been able to get Timothy into Lighthouse Academy yet. At least, for now, he was happy to be in his current school. That wouldn’t last too long though, and there were still almost five months left in the school year.

  The biggest roadblock to the switch in schools had to do with getting him there. The buses for the private school didn’t run to their area, and even though they had a before school program, she couldn’t drop him off for it since she had to go to work so early. The program didn’t start until eight AM, while she had to be at the restaurant by seven for her current shift.

  “Do you have another big project coming up?” Tristan asked as he poured more syrup over his pancakes.

  “Nope. At least not one that I really like.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I have a book report for my special class.” Timothy picked up a piece of bacon and took a bite.

  “Your special class?” Tristan glanced at Shayna. “What’s that?”

  “I want to keep him with his class, so they just pull him out for a couple of advanced classes. Math and reading, specifically. The staff wanted to bump him up a grade or two, but I didn’t want that, so we compromised.”

  “I don’t mind reading, I just don’t like having to write the report. I’d much rather be doing science experiments.”

  “I hear ya,” Tristan said with a nod. “When I was your age, I would rather be doing math, learning about the things that would help me reach my ultimate goal.”

  “Becoming an architect?” Timothy asked.

  “Yes, exactly. What is it that you want to be?”

  Timothy shrugged. “Sometimes I want to be a scientist, but other days, I want to be a chef.”

  “A chef?”

  “A pancake chef.” Timothy took a bite of pancake loaded with whipped cream.

  Tristan looked at Shayna, and the two of them laughed. It felt good to do that together.

  “How are things going with Eva?” Tristan asked once they had stopped laughing. Timothy was focused on his pancakes and bacon once again.

  “Good. Eva is friendly but doesn’t feel the need to talk all the time. She’s fairly neat, but not overly so which is good since…well…an eight-year-old boy lives there too. It would have been a challenge if she was a neat freak.”

  “That’s good. I had hoped that having her as a roommate wouldn’t be a problem since Belle said she was a real sweetheart.”

  “She has a boyfriend, so sometimes he stops by, but most the time, they go out or to his place.”

  Tristan regarded her for a moment. “But you still miss Lisa.”

  This time, Shayna was the one to shrug. “Yes. I do miss her. I mean, she was a friend, so I miss having her close, but we also miss her because of how our lives fit together so well. Because she was able to work from home, and had such a deep devotion to Timothy, she had a willingness to help us out beyond what your average roommate might have.”

  “No need for the dreaded babysitter, eh?” Tristan picked up his cup of coffee and took a sip.

  “Lisa took care of all of that for us. She was so great at taking care of Timothy when I couldn’t.” Shayna poked at her pancakes with her fork. “I had more flexibility in my shifts then too. I was able to work extra ones when necessary.”

  Tristan lowered his mug to the table as his brows drew together. “Have you been having trouble at work because you can’t be so flexible with shifts now?”

  Shayna sighed, wishing she could take her words back. She didn’t want to lie to Tristan. “Not trouble, per se, but they keep talking about how they need workers who can be flexible.”

  He leaned forward. “Is your job at risk?”

  “I don’t think so. I mean, I’ve been there for almost ten years, but you never know.”

  At her words, Tristan sat back in his seat, his arms crossed over his chest. “Maybe you need to find a new job.”

  “The thing is, they know about me and are aware of my situation. While they would like for me to be more flexible, they have also been understanding if I need to take time off to care for Timothy.” So far…

  She could see that Tristan was mulling over her sit
uation. It was something she’d come to understand about him. He tended to zero in on a problem to try and solve it, or at least come up with possible solutions. That seemed to be how he dealt with her, too. He took her problems, found solutions, and then presented them to her, letting her make the decisions.

  It was something she appreciated, for the most part. On occasion though, she remembered what it was like to have someone who took care of all the difficult decisions, leaving her to deal with the simpler things in their lives. But now, all decisions that pertained to her and Timothy fell on her shoulders.

  “Will you tell me if something happens with your job?”

  “Uh, I suppose so.” Shayna cut off a piece of pancake and jabbed her fork into it. “We are in constant contact most days now. It would be a pretty hard thing to hide from you.”

  Tristan’s eyes narrowed as he watched her. “Please don’t hide things from me, Shay. Honesty is important if we want to be…together.”

  Shayna agreed with him—honesty was important—she just wasn’t sure she could be completely honest with him about everything. She’d lived a whole life before meeting him. And had experienced a whole love—from the beginning, to their marriage, to the moment when death had parted them. She figured she was entitled to some secrets, hidden deep in her heart.

  She would never lie to him, but there were some things she wouldn’t divulge—couldn’t divulge—not if she wanted to have a life with him.

  “I won’t hide it,” Shayna said. “I promise.”

  Tristan appeared to consider her words then nodded. “Thank you.”

  Timothy had finished his pancakes and bacon as they’d talked, and, for the moment, appeared to be full. Shayna was also full, so she accepted the server’s offer of a container to take the remainder of her pancakes home. Timothy would likely be the one to eat them, even though they lacked the whipped cream he always wanted.

  After they were done, Tristan took care of the bill, and they left the restaurant. They were in the midst of a cold snap that didn’t see the daytime temperatures anywhere near zero and night time was plunging to nearly forty below with the windchill. Thankfully, as usual, Tristan had started his car while they were still in the restaurant, so after a quick walk across the parking lot, they climbed into a relatively warm vehicle.