A Different Kind

by Lauryn April

“Actually, I’m going to have to cancel,” she said. There was this tenseness to her voice.

  “Why? What’s up?”

  “Nothing really, I’m just not going to have time today.” Jo’s vague answer caught me off guard. She’d never kept anything from me before, but suddenly I felt like she had a secret.

  “Everything okay? You said you wanted to talk about something last night.”

  “Yeah, everything’s fine,” Jo said. “We’ll talk about it later, promise.” We were outside Jo’s house now. She glanced at her front door. “I gotta go though; I’ll call you later.”

  Jo made her way up the steps. With a quick wave, she disappeared into her house. I stood at the edge of her driveway, wondering what was going on with her. I shook my head and convinced myself it was nothing.

  I walked across the yard to my house. Just before I reached the door, I saw Logan was still sitting on his font steps. His sharp stare inspected me. Dark brown eyes, appearing black through the lenses of his glasses, traced my form as if he were searching for something. His gaze reminded me that black eyes were something to be afraid of, but I couldn’t remember why. I squirmed beneath his gaze, went inside, and locked the door behind me.

  I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and chugged it, then made my way upstairs. Before I showered I went to the window and drew the curtains. I was glad to see that Logan was no longer in sight. However, as I slid the window open my fingers traced an unfamiliar groove in the wood; upon further inspection, I saw there were several scratches in the window frame on both sides. A glimmer of a distant memory, bright white and glossy black, flickered through my mind. An echo of a scream sounded in one ear, then the other. I laid my hand over the four deep grooves. Then, I stared down at my fingers.

  I’d broken a nail.

  Saturday night I went to a bonfire with Hailey, meeting up with some of the other cheerleaders.

  Jo didn’t show. I was a little worried about her, but Ian had been there. He’d kept me distracted.

  Ian was tall, blond, and muscular. He had blue eyes like me and was a teammate of my ex, Jared. But the idea that hanging out with Ian might piss Jared off was only a bonus. I’d had a crush on the wide receiver since running into him at a party at the end of the summer.

  “You look nice,” Ian said.

  I smiled. “Thank you.”

  We were gathered in a clearing in Moody’s Woods, hidden from the road and passing police cruisers by the thick forest. I was standing as close to the fire as the heat would allow, watching as orange embers danced toward the tree tops. The flames licked the air, casting Ian’s face in flickering orange light.

  It was obvious Ian liked me back, but I played it cool. I was making him do all the work.

  “Would you like another drink?” he asked.

  I nodded, handing him my red plastic cup to refill with some cheap light beer from the keg. Hailey winked at me from across the way. I smiled back with a wide, confident grin. But inside my stomach was churning, waiting for him to return. Just before he came back, I felt a strange tingling sensation behind my right ear. I scratched at it, but it didn’t go away.

  Ian returned, handing me a full cup of beer. I smiled but was still distracted by the tickling itch at the edge of my hairline. Ian said something, but I missed it completely as the prickling feeling grew. Suddenly it wasn’t just a tingling, but a sharp spark of pain.

  “Payton,” Ian said. I turned to him, realizing I’d zoned him out.

  “What? Sorry,” I rubbed my head, but the pain only grew stronger. “I um…I’m getting a bit of a headache.”

  “Sorry,” Ian said, concerned for me. “If you’re not feeling well, I could take you home. I’m not drinking tonight.”

  I didn’t want to leave. I wanted to hang out and party. I wanted to stand by the fire and talk to him. Then I felt another shock. I winced as the pain spread across my skull, feeling like thousands of tiny needles.

  I nodded at Ian. “Actually, if you wouldn’t mind taking me home that’d be great.”

  On the ride back Ian and I passed the time with light conversation. I did my best to ignore the throbbing pain in my head, but my efforts fell short. I got out of his mother’s SUV. He smiled in a way that made my heart flutter, and even though my head ached and I felt nauseous, that fluttering was the best feeling in the world.

  I chalked my headache up to the fact that I’d been drinking and crashed into bed feeling more than a little tipsy. Eventually, my head stopped hurting.

  When I tried to fall asleep, however, I found I had other problems. Flashes of light filled my dreams, and this weightless sensation kept shaking me awake. I closed my eyes, feeling the tug of exhaustion pull me under, but the brightness returned. I opened my eyes to find I was still in bed – except things were different. I wasn’t wearing the t-shirt and jeans I’d crashed in, and the smell of campfire no longer lingered in the air. Instead, I wore the soft cotton night shirt I’d had on the night before.

  I squinted into the light. I must have left the TV on again. My eyes adjusted. I focused on the small golden figurine that sat atop one of my cheerleading trophies. My eyes narrowed. Confusion swarmed my mind. Did I move the trophy from the top shelf? Why hadn’t I moved it back? The room shimmered around me as I twisted around.

  All I saw was stark white. I blinked. After a moment, my eyes adjusted for the second time. The light wasn’t coming from my TV. It poured in through my bedroom window. Then I realized something else. I wasn’t lying on my bed. I was hovering three feet above it. My cheerleading trophy had never moved – I had. There was nothing but empty air below me, nothing holding me up. I was floating. A shrill scream broke past my lips.

  This can’t be real. I felt dizzy and I flailed around, trying to grab anything to pull myself back down to earth. My clammy palms grabbed one of my bed posts. I gripped it tight, but it slipped free. No, no, no. Frenzied gasps passed my lips. My head whipped around. A brilliant colorless light streamed through my bedroom window, and I was moving through it. I had shut the window. I had closed the blinds, but now the blinds were drawn, the window was open, and I was floating.

  “Mom!” I yelled, my voice trembling. “Help! Mom. Dad. Help me!” My cries were louder this time. “Help!” My voice broke.

  No one came to my rescue. I was alone. My heart thudded in my chest. I spun around midair. Slowly, I was sucked toward the window. I panicked, but there was nothing I could do. When I reached the window I tried grabbing onto the frame to pull myself back in. I clawed at the molding and scratched at the ledge. My nails dug into the wood, and my muscles strained as I gripped the sill.

  “Please,” I said. “Please, no!”

  The pull was too strong.

  My grasp slipped.

  The window fell out of reach.

  I was hyperventilating. My arms stretched out before me, my fingers still reaching for the window. It became more distant with every tormented breath.

  “Help!” I yelled. My body dangled in the air. “Someone help me!” Again my cries went unanswered.

  I twisted around until I was facing the light. My body stiffened; I found myself unable to move. Completely frozen, I could do nothing but stare into the light that with every passing second grew in intensity. I was crying. Tears ran in streams down the sides of my face, but I couldn’t wipe them away.

  CHAPTER

  3

  I awoke, tangled in my sheets, and stared down at my turquoise comforter. I grasped it in my hands, as if it were my lifeline to reality. Even then, the terror rushed through my veins, though I was quickly forgetting why. I looked to the window. It had been open in my dream, but it was shut now, and the blinds were closed. I wore the t-shirt and jeans I’d fallen asleep in, the smell of smoke still lingered on their threads, and my head throbbed slightly. I realized I was safe in my bed, and the fear faded away. All that remained was just some silly dream where I was floating.

  I laughed and ran my hands through my hair. Still, the
re was something about that experience that felt more like a memory than a dream. A part of me tried to hold on to those feelings, as if they were important somehow. But I couldn’t help it. The memory turned into a fog. Within minutes of waking, I convinced myself it was nothing but a dream. After a few deep breaths I got out of bed and got ready for the day.

  All day Sunday I hung out at the mall with friends. Any remaining thoughts of my nightmare had long since dissipated. Hailey wanted to scope out Homecoming dresses, but neither of us found anything we fell in love with. In fact, other than demanding Melissa tell me where she got the skirt she was wearing (which would have looked adorable on me), I didn’t see anything that I really wanted to buy.

  That night, I actually had a sit-down dinner with my parents. They’d ordered from a local restaurant. Mom wasn’t exactly the Betty Crocker type. Overall it had been a fairly uneventful weekend. Still, there was something bothering me, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Whatever it was, it hovered at the edge of my consciousness, which would occasionally fray, and in the corner of my eye I’d catch a glimpse of something I knew I should remember, but couldn’t.

  Monday I had English first hour. I was looking forward to seeing Jo. I wondered if she’d gotten her hair cut. It was strange we hadn’t talked more over the weekend, but I didn’t really have a reason to think much of it. When I walked into class, however, I was distracted by the intense stare aimed at me from the back of the room. Logan Reed had ignored me for twelve years, but now every time I saw him, his gaze burned straight through me. What the hell was that about?

  I stood dumbly at the front of the classroom, caught in his gaze, until he looked down at his desk. As his glasses slid slightly down his nose, I took my seat beside Jo.

  “What was that about?” she asked. I realized I hadn’t been the only person to notice Logan’s behavior.

  “Not a clue,” I responded.

  Jo shrugged, glancing back at Logan. “Seems like mister dark and mysterious has a crush on you, if you ask me.”

  “Dark and mysterious? Please, Jo, try loner and weird…and creepy.”

  “He’s not weird, he just keeps to himself,” Jo insisted. “And he’s kind of cute…in a nerdy sort of way.”

  “I know you’re into the whole bookworm deal, and Paul could pull off the glasses make me look smart thing.” Paul was Jo’s ex. “But there’s nothing attractive about Logan and his hipster frames, and the way he’s always hovering in a corner…staring.” I’m sure I made some kind of face. I closed my eyes for a second and shook my head. “Okay, why are we talking about Logan?”

  Jo stared at me for a long moment. “He really does creep you out, doesn’t he?”

  I didn’t respond. I realized she was right. Logan did freak me out. For the rest of English I found myself wondering what it was about Logan that made me feel uneasy, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.

  The day wore on, and I continued to feel like I was forgetting something. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t think of what it was. When I got to the science room fourth period, my uneasiness was sparked in a strange way. Sitting in my usual seat at my lab station, I caught sight of something across the room that I felt unable to look away from.

  Above the cabinets where the microscopes were kept was a group of taxidermy animals. Two squirrels climbed a branch, a small fox was lying down, and an owl stared straight at me. Its large dark eyes set in a white face seemed alive. Something about it absolutely terrified me. A cold sweat broke across my skin. I swallowed the knot in my throat. When I was finally able to look away, I immediately moved to the other side of the table. I couldn’t see the stuffed owl from that seat. My lab partner came in and gave me an odd look, but said nothing about my abrupt change in our seating arrangement.

  Shortly after, Mr. Gregor came in and started discussing a new project he was assigning. Collectively, the class groaned as he handed out the rubric. I’d taken Astronomy because I needed another science credit. I’d been hoping it’d be an easy A class. I mean, how hard could learning about the stars and reading horoscopes be – except that was Astrology. I hadn’t realized the difference until it was too late.

  “Why do stars twinkle? Why isn’t Pluto a planet anymore? Is there life on Mars?” Mr. Gregor attempted to stir up discussion. I lifted an eyebrow in amusement.

  A few girls in the room giggled.

  “These are among your choices for research topics, and though they may sound silly, take them seriously. Papers are due the Wednesday after Homecoming.”

  I didn’t bother to look at the rubric as I slid it between the pages of my notebook. I rolled my eyes at the thought of writing a paper on space stuff. This class would have been way better if it were about horoscopes.

  After class I had practice. We were working on a new routine for the Homecoming game next month. The second I walked into the locker room, I heard Erica complaining about the extra day of practice a week. She caught sight of me and made this “oh shit” face. Then she turned away, tightening her ponytail and pretending like she hadn’t said anything. I rolled my eyes. Sometimes I think Erica forgot cheerleading was a sport. We didn’t just wear short skirts and dress up pretty for the football players to stare at. We were athletes, and the flip I was hoping to add to our routine would take some serious skill.

  “So, you never told me what you did all weekend?” I asked Jo as we walked across the gym.

  We were the last to leave the locker room. All the other girls were stretching when we stepped out. Jo was silent at first, and I caught her cheeks flushing, but she refused to answer. When a coy smile pulled at her lips, I knew there was only one thing that could make her grin like that.

  “Oh my God,” I whispered. I stopped walking, forcing her to stop along with me.

  “Oh my God, what?”

  “You’re seeing someone!” Jo’s eyes widened. “Why didn’t you tell me? And don’t deny it. You haven’t made that face since you and Paul were dating.”

  “Shh, okay okay,” she said, glancing over her shoulder to make sure no one else heard. “I had a date, but that’s it, and you can’t tell anyone…not yet.”

  “What. No, you have to tell me everything.”

  Jo shushed me again, “Payton, please, just keep quiet about this for right now.”

  She was so serious it threw me. I didn’t understand why it was such a big deal, but I nodded.

  “Ladies,” Mrs. Davis called. We joined the rest of the group before we were punished with extra laps.

  Practice was ruthless. We stayed a full two hours after school, and by the end I was ready to collapse. It could have been my exhaustion that caused what happened next – that’s what everyone would say later. I know it wasn’t.

  I stood at the top of the pyramid, my arms tight at my sides. Our chants rang though the air. One. Two. Three. Zap. I flinched. The pain pulsed behind my right ear, the electrical impulse snaking along my skull. My whole body jerked. I lost my balance. My team scrambled to adjust for my misstep as I started to fall. They tried to catch me. They didn’t.

  I landed on the blue mat with a smack. My head hit hard. For a moment, everything flashed white. My teammates groaned, and I rolled onto my back. As I looked up, staring at the raftered gym ceiling, I let out a deep breath, then I turned my head. There, standing at the back of the gym, was Logan. He hovered in the doorway, looking straight at me. I pushed myself to my feet.

  “You okay?” Hailey asked.

  I looked to her. “Yeah,” I said in a huff. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  When I looked back, Logan was gone.

  CHAPTER

  4

  The night of the bonfire I’d assumed the shock I’d felt was just a headache from drinking. I couldn’t use that excuse to explain what had happened during practice. Mrs. Davis took the collapse of our human pyramid as a sign to stop for the day. The spot behind my ear didn’t itch or tingle anymore. I didn’t feel electric shocks skate across the surface of my skull, but the me
mory still lingered with me on my way home.

  Once in bed I drifted off, worried something was wrong with me. Maybe I had a brain tumor or a poisonous bug bite behind my ear, but there was also a deeper worry. It was possible something else had happened to me.

  I was missing something. There was a gaping hole in my memory. I could skate around its edges, but I was too afraid to look in. Instead, I looked past it. I pretended it wasn’t there. But, as I slept that night, there were things that clawed out of that hole, things that slithered up past its edge and into my mind. Things, unable to be contained by the dark chasm they’d been banished to, that dragged themselves into the open.

  In my sleep I saw their wide, dark eyes staring at me. I saw my face reflected in the glass-like black discs hovering before me. Bright light backlit grey skin. It created a halo around the demon, his thin lips twisting into a smile. I was frozen, wearing nothing but my nightgown. I could feel the cold metal of the table beneath my arms and calves. I could do nothing but stare at the strange being. His head was too large, his eyes too wide, and his fingers too long. The creature reached one bulbous fingertip to touch my forehead.

  I woke in a deep sweat, panting and shaking. The fear still pulsed through my veins, making me feel like I was hopped up on too much caffeine. I ran a hand through my hair. My fingers traced along the place behind my ear. I feared I was going crazy.

  After shaking my uneasy thoughts away, I got ready for the day. I tried to focus on my life, school, friends, boys: anything other than the messed up dream I’d had.

  When I reached my locker, Hailey was waiting for me. She held her books tight to her chest, and her lips spread into a mischievous smile.

  “Guess what I heard?” she asked.

  I twisted in my locker combination. “What?” I pulled the door open.

  “Darren told me he thinks Ian is going to ask you to Homecoming!”

  With that one sentence, I found my focus. No longer was I thinking about black eyes, bright lights, or shocks across my skull. I thought about Ian, and dancing, and what dress I would wear. A smile crept across my face. When I looked back to Hailey, I felt dizzy and breathless.